A small piece of the story-me as an OOT

[Sky]

In all my lurking in the past few months, I don't think I have ever run across anyone talking about their experience as an Outer Org Trainee.

For those not familiar with this training program, what happens is a Class V Org decides to (or is forced to) send one of their staff members to train at Flag or a Continental Training Org. They get through their training program and return to their Class V org as "Flag-Trained!!" Generally it is to train for some kind of technical post, i.e.: auditor, case supervisor, course supervisor; although sometimes they send people for other training as well.

I went to Flag as an Outer Org Trainee and it was probably the first truly awful experience I had as a Scientologist. At my home org it was very friendly and all about helping yourself and others become more able, yada yada yada. We might have been delusional but we were happily delusional.

So I got talked into going to Flag. "Wow!" everyone said, "You'll love Flag!"

The Flag promo insisted it was the "Friendliest Place on Earth" and "Happiest Place on Earth."

I was really excited! I hopped on a plane as soon as I was approved and took off to Clearwater. The flight my org could afford was a red-eye with quite a long layover, so I ended up arriving without having slept for over 24 hours (couldn't sleep on the plane--too excited!) and the only food in my belly was airline peanuts and OJ.

Well, I wasn't much of a traveler and it took me awhile once I'd arrived to figure out how to get from the airport to Flag, but I finally got a shuttle and was heading to downtown Clearwater.

The rest of the day is kind of blurry. I attribute that to the lack of food and sleep thing, as well as being really confused and lost.

Basically I was put on a routing form and told, "go here" "go there", get on this bus and find this person and get them to sign this and then go onto another place.

For anyone who's never been to Flag, it is actually made up of several different buildings in Clearwater. Some of the buildings are just down the street or across the street from other buildings, and some are further away. They made the OOTs (Outer Org Trainees) ride shuttles between ALL the buildings. Even if it was a one minute walk away, you were supposed to take a shuttle. I got so freaking turned around I had no idea which direction was what, I couldn't figure out why people kept telling me to catch a van to such and such a place and I'd get on the van and tell the driver where I was going and it seemed to me like he'd go around the block and drop me off in the same place I started. I was getting SO frustrated.

And everyone acts like you're in their way or putting them out if you dare to ask them to help you figure out what you're supposed to be doing or where you're supposed to be going.

(Later I would figure out that had to do with the pressure put on everyone to get through their training. I became one of those people myself for a little while. That's probably one of the biggest things that bothers me about being a Scientologist. I WAS one of the nasty ones for a time. I was completely unsympathetic and unreasonable and I had contempt for a lot of people. I look back at that and it makes me nauseous.)

Anyway, I finally got some food and sleep after several hours of trying to get through this routing form. I almost decided to go home right then--I can't tell you how many times I looked back at that and wished I'd just hopped on a plane home. But no, I wanted to be Flag-Trained! So I stayed.

I just noticed how much I've written about this. God, there's a lot to say about it. I think at this point I will focus just one particularly nasty aspect of my Flag experience.

The absolute worst thing for me about being an OOT was WORK STUDY. It should have been called "slaves for the FC."

One thing I probably have to clarify here. Flag in Clearwater isn't considered just one org. The two orgs I dealt with were Flag Service Org and Flag Crew (I don't know, there might be other orgs as well). Flag Service Org was the org that delivered training and processing. Flag Crew was the org that provided all the food, berthing, transportation, etc. for the staff and public and OOTs.

When my org at home didn't bring in enough money to pay for my room and board with Flag Crew that week, I had to do Work Study. Now, I was warned about Work Study before I went to Flag, but the people who told me about it made it sound like no big deal. Just helping out occasionally to "keep my exchange in."

Well, it turned out that to pay Flag Crew back for my room and board (which consisted of sharing an old moldy motel room with five other trainees that I didn't know, and eating my three meals a day that were prepared for 1500 of us and didn't involve much variety) I had to work for them about 35 hours a week, doing whatever grunt job that no one else in Flag Crew wanted to do. We often worked alongside the EPFers, although at the time I didn't know what the EPF was.

In the mornings they would gather all of us together who had non-paying orgs, and tell us how awful our orgs were that they didn't care enough about us to make enough money to pay for us to get through our training. (Since we were doing Work Study about five hours a day, every day, it took a big chunk of time out of our study time. If you were an OOT doing Work Study, it took almost twice as long for you to get through your training. That's a lot of time when you're looking at training programs that are for a year or two.) They would make us take turns calling our orgs and telling them they had to be "Tone 40" about getting us off Work Study, they would make us write Knowledge Reports on our orgs for not paying it. They would read us LRH quotes to get us all riled up about it, and make us chant them.

Now, I loved my org. I knew that they were doing their best to just keep the power and water on. At first I refused to write the reports. But after weeks of listening to how much our orgs were letting us, and therefore the planet, down; I started to kind of resent everyone back home. They didn't have to do Work Study... they didn't care that I did! They were committing a vile disservice by not making it go right to get that $120 to Flag every week!

I can't believe I let it get to me.

So after the 30-40 minutes of this BS, we would have to go with our masters for the day. They weren't actually called this but that's pretty much what they were. Sometimes we'd get lined up and then the staff of the Flag Crew that needed workers would come over and point to us, "I want that Work Study" (yes, they actually called us "Work Studies") or "I'm supposed to get three Work Studies today, those three will do." It was one of the most degrading experiences of my life. I felt like a slave on the block.

You would have to do whatever work they told you to. Most of the work I did was cleaning; cleaning the outsides of the motels, cleaning laundry, cleaning hotel rooms, cleaning dishes. There were other jobs and sometimes you would get in with one of the FC staff and have a nice steady place for a little bit, but then someone else would need you somewhere else and you'd get taken away to work for them. Or your org would manage to pay for you for a week and when you were back the next week someone would have taken your place.

Boy, this has turned out to be a lot longer than I expected when I started writing. I think I will call this my "Work Study" installment of Life as an Outer Org Trainee.

Anyway, I had read a lot of accounts of what it was like for those in the Sea Org, and I just wanted to contribute a different angle on being part of it without being part of it.

Sky

[Emma]

Sky this is fascinating!

I missed out on going to Flag as an OOT and I was devistated!

I heard snippets of how horrible it was from my friend who was sent over for he GAT evolution, but only snippets and only when her guard was down. For the most there was this "stiff upperlip" attitude or a "What happened at Flag stays at Flag" attitude. I knew even back then that they were controlling our thinking when you couldn't even complain about being treated appallingly, and everyone agreed with that rule!

I'd love to know more about this subject. It hardly ever gets discussed.

I'm excited!!

[jodie]

Thanks very much for sharing this story. Very interesting indeed, and I think the same experiences occurred no matter what continent one is on.

In our case, it was when the whole KTL LOC push came through, and all orgs HAD to have KTL supervisors. Two staff at our org were selected to go to Flag, and we all envied them to go to the Mecca of Scientology.

When they returned, they looked tired and stressed, and were also mostly quite tight-lipped about the experience. One was a good friend of mine, and I cornered [the person] eventually - and all they could say was that it was WILD. Having to sleep in mass-packed dormitries, having to find own money to pay for basics, and a non-stop pace to squeeze out the maximum training in the minimum amount of time, so as not to waste any costs on mere staff members. :eek:

The person eventually admitted that it was not what [the person] was expecting at all. Which was as close as it could get to that person admitting they were rattled by the experience.

Even at that time, when I was still in and winning, I was immensely bothered by that account. Flag was supposed to be the Holy Grail of perfection - I had pictured upstat efficiency, upstat setting, and very uptone staff, speed of particle flow in a good way. The image of mass-packed dormitries, and having to scramble for money for basic needs did not fit with my idea of upstat at ALL.

Interesting similarity too - because our org was also always getting hammered by "uplines" for not being upstat enough, not having enough money. The telephone lines were cut a few times for non-payment of bills, for example. I remember quite a few staff in the org, whenever something came from up-lines that was even more demanding at usual - they would roll their eyes. One time, we were given an instruction to kludge central files, when it had been done the week before - stupid things like that. In our org, there was definitely a sense of us taking Hubbard's tech and creating something great, but a general sense that "up-lines" was a little insane. The general feeling was that up-lines were far enough away, so they would be put up with, but they could be a royal pain in the a** sometimes.

When the instruction came down for us to have to clap and cheer LRH's picture after each muster, we all just laughed. None of us could help ourselves. But we did it. We had to. However, none of us could look at each other while doing it, or we would burst out laughing, and have to put all of ourselves into ethics!

- jodie

[Emma]

Originally Posted by jodie

When the instruction came down for us to have to clap and cheer LRH's picture after each muster, we all just laughed. None of us could help ourselves. But we did it. We had to. However, none of us could look at each other while doing it, or we would burst out laughing, and have to put all of ourselves into ethics!
- jodie

This made me laugh

I don't know if you were in when the "Road to Freedom" record came out.

At each muster we had to put that awful record on, all stand around in a circle and sing "Get on the road to freedom...help us free all mankind...."

Uuggh! What an experience. It was all we could do not to fall around laughing. We had to be careful not to make eye contact with anyone lest you get in big trouble

This went on for weeks. Initially it was funny, but then it became engramic!

If you want to hear this clap trap it is here: http://www.ronthemusicmaker.org/listen.htm

[Sky]

Originally Posted by jodie

Interesting similarity too - because our org was also always getting hammered by "uplines" for not being upstat enough, not having enough money. The telephone lines were cut a few times for non-payment of bills, for example. I remember quite a few staff in the org, whenever something came from up-lines that was even more demanding at usual - they would roll their eyes. One time, we were given an instruction to kludge central files, when it had been done the week before - stupid things like that. In our org, there was definitely a sense of us taking Hubbard's tech and creating something great, but a general sense that "up-lines" was a little insane. The general feeling was that up-lines were far enough away, so they would be put up with, but they could be a royal pain in the a** sometimes.

That was exactly how it was at my org--we were trying to get things handled that really needed to be handled, work out a battle plan to get things rolling in a good direction, and then some ridiculous order or program would come from management and it would actually stop us from being productive. Most of the time we just kind of perfunctorily (is that a word?) did the thing so we could get back to what we were doing.

One thing that hastened my departure from the church was that management decided to start getting their hands a little dirtier and would send missions to our org all the time. By the time one had left another would show up. I hated it. Their presence at the org just caused a constant tension in the atmosphere, I was always on edge just waiting to get pounced on for not doing something properly or whatever. It's a lot harder to ignore up-lines orders when they're coming from someone standing in front of you. Combined with my own burgeoning doubts about the validity of the tech and problems I was having applying it, I just couldn't take being there anymore.

Emma wrote:
"I don't know if you were in when the "Road to Freedom" record came out.

At each muster we had to put that awful record on, all stand around in a circle and sing "Get on the road to freedom...help us free all mankind...."

Uuggh! What an experience. It was all we could do not to fall around laughing. We had to be careful not to make eye contact with anyone lest you get in big trouble

This went on for weeks. Initially it was funny, but then it became engramic!"

I think I just missed that one. I probably would have been in big trouble. I've always been the one on the edge of being called a Joker and Degrader. I usually was able to supress it but sometimes things got to be too much.

I'll always remember when I first saw "Orientation". When it got to the end and the guy was talking about how if you didn't do Scientology you might as well jump off a bridge or blow your brains out, I cracked up. I couldn't stop laughing. It was about the most ridiculous thing I think I'd ever heard. I didn't think he could possibly be serious. When the Reg came into the film room I was still laughing. I got a weird look for that one.

[chuckbeatty]

Dear Sky,

Please go on with your story. I would love to hear the rest of your time as an Outer Org Trainee, go into details for weeks. Take your time, spell it all out. Give more details of your seniors in FC, how many cooks, how many maids, how many this's and that's.

I fully grasp your Outer Org Trainee predicaments at Flag. I was there from Dec 75 till Jun 83, and witnessed how the LRH orders to put outer org trainees on work study even came about in the first place.

It really is a sick system, and with trainees indoctrinated and clamoring to be little DMs as the winning valence, it is a wonder Flag staff aren't even more stressed at the dicotomies of having to pretend to be the "Friendliest Place in the World" at the same time outer org staff are doing maid and cleaning duties for the got-bucks FCCIs.

I was a course supervisor during the 1981 FEBC evolution, when the Int Training Org was still at Flag, and the 1981 FEBC evolution (20 students per dorm, they had to get in and out of their bunks in a specific order, shower in specific order, etc.) it was called a "this lifetime engram" by eval later.

The hardships and predicaments within authoritarian setups where "friendliness" is ordered, it turns things into a pretense show.

There was more heart and more sympathy I think the earlier and closer one goes back in time, over the years, but still the same false front pretense and gritted teeth ordering people around without any care for them as human beings, the authoritarianism unfortunately goes back to LRH.

"We'd rather have you dead than incapable!"

"Fit that into the economics ...and you see the cross we have to bear."

LRH was all pragmatism, he was so over the top sure of his (Scientology's) worth that if it meant he had to steamroll anyone in the way of him getting the Planet cleared, then that was simply what it was going to take.

It all comes back to LRH, all of it.

He's a human being, packed with the normal faults and failings, and his own religion, where he got away with making the rules that now no one else can change, so the continuing mess is really his fault, since otherwise internally the movement could rid itself of the idiocies it perpetuates.

Chuck Beatty
ex Scientologist/Sea Org member (1975-2003)
Pittsburgh
412-260-1170
chuckbeatty77 @aol.com

[Kookaburra]

Originally Posted by chuckbeatty

LRH was all pragmatism, he was so over the top sure of his (Scientology's) worth that if it meant he had to steamroll anyone in the way of him getting the Planet cleared, then that was simply what it was going to take.

It all comes back to LRH, all of it.

He's a human being, packed with the normal faults and failings, and his own religion, where he got away with making the rules that now no one else can change, so the continuing mess is really his fault, since otherwise internally the movement could rid itself of the idiocies it perpetuates.

Hi Chuck
From what I can see, LRH had his ruthless side, the winning valence that DM took on, and his paranoid side, the winning valence that OSA took on.

But really the worst blunder in the legacy he left would have to be the idea of dissaffection and the whole rollback thing, and the gruesome punishments for correctly spotting an outpoint on someone/something who wasn't supposed to have any.

I see this as the most fundamental reason that CofS has become the monster it has, and why it it doomed to failure. It cannot correct itself. It cannot even examine it's own faults, or the consequences of it's actions, thus has no conscience.

It's not because someone can't change the rules. They have changed policy and tech left right and centre. It is that they can't say anything when something is wrong.

Sky, your OOT story interests me very much. I was also an OOT but much earlier than you (1977/78) and things were heaps different then. I will let you finish your story, then I'll tell you mine and we can compare notes.

And yes, Chuck, I know you. I spent months in the FBEC.

[Sky]

There were times doing work study where I really felt abused. Like when we would have to clean the outside of the motels (windows, doors, A/C units, etc.) in the July heat with no water or breaks for five hours. There would be one person, I think it was the CO of the motel, who would give us the cleaning supplies and tell us what to do and then just disappear somewhere. There were usually two or three of us doing this job, and if we didn’t get the whole building done when the CO came back, they would tell us how disappointed they were and that we would have to work harder next time.

Or if you were in the galley peeling 50 pounds of onions or chopping 200 pounds of chicken or cooking a thousand hamburgers. Never had more cuts, burns and blisters in my life. Although I have to say, the cooks in the galley (there were five of them) were some pretty amazing people. They put up with crap that would have made me run screaming. Can you imagine being in charge of cooking three meals a day for 1500 people? And pretty much any job they gave us to do, was something they would do themselves. A lot of the time we would work alongside each other getting the massive amounts of food prepared.

It was really difficult to be on Work Study and on some course where you needed a twin. If your twin didn’t have work study, they would get ahead of you and then have to catch you up when you got there. I found that only the most loyal people would stay your twin if you had work study and they didn’t. I remember reading the bulletin on twinning and how you had to have a twin and how a twin was responsible to get their twin through, but I practically never saw people keep the same twins through an entire course at Flag. It was like they were in too much of a hurry to get people through to pay attention to policy. It was for the greatest good, right? And it was practically impossible to get through auditing when on work study. Sessionability was a big problem for most of us.

You know, one thing I didn’t mention was that Outer Org Trainees would also come from the Sea Org orgs. It wasn’t only Class V org staff. Generally the SO OOTs had their room and board paid for by their orgs every week. Occasionally there’d be some problem with FP and some of them would have to do work study for a day or two until their org got the money to FC. I’ve never heard such protesting from SO members as when they had to do work study.

In fact, another one of my pet peeves was the way there was a kind of a caste system for everyone who was there. And we Class V org staff were at the bottom of the totem pole. (The only ones lower than us were the EPFers.)

When I first arrived it was during what they called an Evolution. What would happen is someone in upper management would have a great cognition. “We just realized that if every org had a Flag-trained (fill in the blank) the orgs would all boom and the planet would be cleared in a jiffy!” So then the orders would come for every org to send one or more people to Flag to get this great training. It’s not too easy to get someone who is “qualified” for the OOT program, therefore, most of the time it would take awhile to recruit someone to go or replace someone else who was already on staff and get that staff member qualified. So you’d send what people you could scrounge up and get them the training, and just as the last of the OOTs for that evolution were finishing up, there would be another “realization” about what post needed to be filled by a Flag-trained staff member. And a new evolution would start.

When I got there it was a big scramble to get all the new arrivals routed in and found places to stay and everything. So they just put you where they could fit you. The Class V and SO OOTs were all mixed in together. It was pretty interesting for me to get to know some SO members. But then after they got most everyone routed in and settled down, they segregated us. Put the Class V org staff in rooms together and SO members in rooms together. And we started finding out there were rules about the pecking order. If you were getting onto the bus or shuttle, you had to let an SO OOT get on first. When we were in line for dinner, the SO OOTs got in front of us. On course, it seemed like an unspoken rule to some of the Supes that if there was an SO OOT that needed help (word clearing, checkout on a drill, etc.) and a Class V OOT that needed help, the SO OOT would get help first. Not all the Supes were that way but there were a few that were. Definitely if you were talking about an OOT that was from CMO or a management org, they were the priority.

This bugged me big time. Sometimes I wondered if they did it to try and get the Class V org members to join the SO. When I was there they had a rule that you weren’t supposed to overtly recruit someone who was on staff at a Class V org. If the person originated that they wanted to join the SO, then… have at them.

SO OOTs also seemed to get priority in HCO, Ethics. God, I could go on for days about being stuck in Ethics at Flag. It was like a black hole. Everyone was afraid of going to Ethics because you would never get out.

Once I was in to do an O/W write up. I had originated that I wanted to go home (basically I was just homesick) and so they had me do the write-up, since if I wanted to leave I must have overts.

I was on that stupid thing for weeks. Each time I got to a good point and was ready for a meter check, it would be one or two days of waiting in HCO before I could get someone to give me the check. By that time I was usually kind of irritated at having to wait for so long, and guess what—no floating needle! “Go write more.” It got to the point where I was doing nothing but Work Study and wracking my brain for what O/Ws I had committed that I wasn’t writing up. It got to the point where I would commit some overt (like skipping exercise time) just so I’d have something to write down. After getting yelled at by the MAA, I refused to write more. I said I was done and I wouldn’t write another thing down. I finally got handled in Qual on it and was relieved as hell. But after that I made sure not to do anything that might get me sent to Ethics. I couldn’t believe how inefficient they were there. I mean, it was Flag for God’s sake! You would think this alone would give me a clue about the fact that there were problems in the church and I needed to get out. But no, I decided that it must be that I wasn’t dedicated enough to be willing to experience anything. Although I’ll tell you one thing, it got me to the point where I was never tempted to join the SO!:eek:

[Sky]

Oh, and I would love to hear your stories Kookaburra and Chuck. I always wondered about how the Work Study program got started.

I remember asking for a reference on it from one of the people in charge of the work study program, but they always put me off. I finally asked the Qual Librarian and was directed to some telex that was from Ron that basically said to have the OOTs work for Flag part-time if their org couldn't pay for them. I tried to talk to the work study people about it, but they were very put off by my apparent unwillingness to keep my exchange in. When I told them I felt like they were out exchange with me, they were flabbergasted. It was useless trying to reason with them.

[Nom de Plume]

I haven't thought about this in years! I was an OOT, too. What memories!

Emma said: "What happens at Flag stays at Flag". LOL

Great posts everyone!

Nom de Plume