Finally out. Still fighting.

Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by Isy, Jul 24, 2018.

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  1. Isy

    Isy Patron

    Hi guys.

    I've been in Scientology from 2007-2017. My last service was a confessional after my last relationship was cheating on me for a long time... That was the final thing that made me leave for good.
    I've never been staff but volunteer helper for years up to eight hours after work. I went to the mission every day. Writing letters to others. Cleaning the restrooms. Going outside, selling books... I worked for the psychiatry IAS idiot tour, giving Flyer to people. Oh... I'm German. It's a big deal here... I also traveled a lot. I've been in Kopenhagen, Malmo, London, CC Int, Berlin... Talked to people there. Made ''friends'' on events...
    I have a million stories to share . Still fighting with losing many of my friends...

    The fun fact: I wanted to stop smoking. I couldn't until a friend made a deal with me. For every cigarette I smoke I have to donate 100 bucks to the Scientology Mission here in Bremen. Since then I did not touch a single cigarette. Haha.

    I really hope I find people here to exchange experience.
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  2. HelluvaHoax!

    HelluvaHoax! Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on


    There are a lot of really great stories, fascinating posts and cool people here, have fun!
    Last edited: Jul 24, 2018
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  3. Enthetan

    Enthetan Master of Disaster

    Scientology tries very hard to ensure that nobody thinks they can have greater loyalty to any friend, family, or spouse, than their loyalty to Scientology.

    Some of your friends may wind up re-connecting after they leave themselves. Make sure they are able to reach you when it's time.

    Many of us have been out a long time, and our stories are from many years ago. It would be interesting to hear stories about how things are now in Scientology.
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  4. Emma

    Emma Mother of Dragons Administrator

    Yes some fresh news would be great!

    Welcome to ESMB :welcome:
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  5. tesseract

    tesseract Patron with Horrors

    Hallo aus Wien. :)
    I'm not an ex, though, just a cult watcher...
    As others mentioned, some recent stories would be of great use... :cool:
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  6. Veda

    Veda Sponsor


    The link at the bottom of this post connects to the old ESMB web site that contains quite a few accounts of experience.

    Here's an account from a half century ago.

    Public Scientologist William Burroughs

    An excerpt from the book Naked Scientology by William Burroughs, who was a "public person," regarding his experiences at St. Hill in the late 1960s:

    ...I remember one weekend after a few drinks confiding certain doubts about Scientology to a supposed friend.

    "They'll wring it out of me at the next Sec Check," he sobbed. "Why don't you go straight to Ethics and make a clean breast of it?"​

    I remember some old biddy dragging me into a broom closet... and asking me on the e-meter, "Do you have any unkind thoughts about L. Ron Hubbard? ... That reads. What do you consider that means?"

    "He's so beautiful he dazzles me. I can't help resenting it sometimes."

    In the words of Celine - "All this time I felt my self respect slipping away and finally completely gone. As it were, officially removed..."

    Like an anthropologist who has, after unspeakable indignities, penetrated a savage tribe, I was determined to hang on and get the big medicine...

    ...I was ordered for a Joberg [Security Check] because I rockslammed [a type of 'read' on the e-meter] on a question, "What would have to happen before Scientology worked on everybody?" (I couldn't confront it.) The [1961] Joberg published for the first time in Inside Scientology [1972]...

    ... "That's it!" barks a sulky Sea Org lieutenant in the doorway of the Public Ethics Officer.

    "Everybody line up for a Sec Check."

    When my turn comes I pick up the cans.

    "Do you consider St. Hill a safe environment?"

    "Yes, of course I do."

    "There's a read there. What do you consider that could mean?"

    "Well, we're surrounded by suppressives. It frightens me to think of these devils all around us."

    I was learning...


    Also, in the mid and late 1960s, John McMaster, "the first real Clear" - having been the first person to have completed the newly released 'Clearing Course' - traveled the world promoting Scientology. He was very popular.

    In 1969, McMaster was officially "erased" from Scientology after Hubbard had him Declared a Suppressive Person.

    Interviewed in 1985, he said this about Scientology of the 1960s:

    He [Hubbard] got the technology to a point where he had a sort of assembly line as he called it. And he told me he was putting all these square ball bearings on the assembly line, and then turning them into round ball bearings at the other end.


  7. Isy

    Isy Patron

    OK. Some news... Well after the objective process is now called ''survival rundown''. The brand new thing now is Gat II which means Miscavige and a bunch of people worked really hard to ''finally'' deliver just Ron's tech and not tech which is changed by former SPs. That means the objective processes you did before (many times) were not flat anymore ... AGAIN.. . so again you had to pay 2000 bucks (in Germany) to do the whole thing INCLUDING the purification rundown where you now NEED to be on 5000 mg Niacin before you can even think of being done with that I was throwin up over and over and over... I didn't get to the survival rundown because I had to do ethics for two years because of relationship stuff. My partner was cheating on me and it was all my fault. So I wrote overts all the time. Marriage counseling. I did a confessional... Thousands of dollars ... Anyway.
    The student hat is new. No more staring at the wall. No endless reference learning but still you gotta know all the phenomenons by heart ...
    The time I was ''blowing'' I was on the second turn of the student hat. You have to do it two times now and then the exam ...
    The times before... Some years ago I studied the basics. I became the Hubbard Dianetics Auditor and as helper for my mission I gave auditing to other publics, wrote letters....

    Just today I got a call from Hamburg... DSA. I made some trouble because of all the calls and letters ... And I'm still dealing with losing my friends ...
  8. ThetanExterior

    ThetanExterior Gold Meritorious Patron

    Is it true they no longer have the Tech (red) volumes and OEC (green) volumes in the courseroom?
  9. Isy

    Isy Patron

    They are there but locked in a closet.
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  10. pineapple

    pineapple Silver Meritorious Patron

    If you need further help to quit smoking, I highly recommend nicotine chewing gum. I smoked for over 40 years and finally quit, using nicotine gum. Then I quit the gum a few years later. I've been smoke-free for 10 years now.

    Congratulations on getting out of scn. :thumbsup:
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  11. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    Hi Isy!


    I suspect you may have came up with some good Tech on how to quit smoking. :D
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  12. Isy

    Isy Patron

    Haha. Indeed there's a way now to get a special program from the cs. Lol. You write down the goals you want to achieve in life before the survival rundown and you get a bunch of additionals to fix your whole life. Smoking is part of that too. You go outside with a pack of cigarettes and smoke and smoke and smoke ... The instruction is : smoke this cigarette ... Until you have a cognition of throw up. Too bad I missed it...
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  13. Isy

    Isy Patron

    Thank you . I'm doing well and it works good so far .
  14. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    You do have to be careful now with quitting smoking.

    LRH indicated that not smoking enough could cause lung cancer! :eek:

  15. Isy

    Isy Patron

    Oh... I thought I die because I blowed on the student hat and all my life stats are going Dien from now on and I get terrible sick... Damn
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  16. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    LRH was masterful at using fear to control us all and keep us within the bubble. :thumbsup:
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  17. tesseract

    tesseract Patron with Horrors

    Well as I was working in a lab full of fuel samples and verrry inflammable chemicals, my addicted co-workers used to vape the stuff.* Seems to work if I may say so, with acceptably little maintenance, and no tar or other cancerogene substances anymore in your lungs...
    Quitting nicotine altogether, ofcourse, is the by far better solution, as even pure nicotine has some bad effects too (not to speak of the glycerine,... etc in the vapo liquids).

    * Except one. Nice guy, but sometimes I still wonder how old he'll get! :eek: :cool: :D
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  18. pineapple

    pineapple Silver Meritorious Patron

    Seriously, do they really do that? C/S you to smoke until you have a cog or puke? But if you puke, don't you need to flatten the process? Keep smoking until you stop puking? :roflmao:

    When I was younger, kids were sometimes forced to smoke until they got sick, as a kind of aversion therapy, on the theory that this would "turn them off" to smoking. Sometimes it worked. I never heard of anyone having a cog, though -- unless it was, "I'd rather stop smoking than have my old man make me do that again!"
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2018
  19. Wilbur

    Wilbur Patron Meritorious

    Welcome Isy!!! I hope you find ESMB useful and enlightening.

    So the Survival Rundown is EXACTLY objectives, is it? Or is it objectives plus other stuff added? (I'm asking because I don't know, not because I think what you said is wrong. 'Survival Rundown' sounds like the kind of thing that would have sec checks in it, just from the name). When I was in, Objectives was just called Objectives, on the Bridge. What about the auditor training courses? When I was in, there was a Class V course, then a Class V graduate course. What is it now? Is it Class V, then Class VA, then Class V graduate? I seem to recall that something else had been added as well.

    Are people still doing the Key to Life and Life Orientation courses?
  20. Isy

    Isy Patron

    OK. It's all the same. Just different names. The new Objectives include more reading. Now you study the whole SOS again before the sessions beginn. Sec Checks are made randomly. Like it was before. Missions normally are not that strict. For marriage counseling I was in Hamburg in the Org. There I had to make several checks ....
    The survival rundown includes:

    TRs of course
    Another book of the basics. (not sure which one)
    The audit includes so called undercuts which prepare you for the main sessions. The main part are the objectives you guys all know from the past. And after that there are three additionals. These processes are to handle EVERY difficulty in life. But like I had to take the other route. And I quit on the student hat. I freaked out in the course room after the supervisor wanted me to listen to one of the tapes the 6th time changing my definitions like I never said it. It was really horrible. I always got in trouble with her .