Lurker5
Gold Meritorious Patron
It's like a wanker.
What's a Wanker?
Just kidding - even though I don't know, I get the gist of it - and Tosser.
It's like a wanker.
That's a Britishism too. Both have a meaning similar to "fuckhead" or "asshole" in American usage.
I apologize - I have a bad sense of humour. Welcome, Monkeyschimps.
My kids were a big part what got me out of Scn. My oldest is very brilliant, and would have had CMO recruiters salivating. When she was young, I started thinking about the kind of pressures that she would be put under to join the Sea Org, and the ethics shit that would come down on my wife and me if we said one word of discouragement about the idea.
This lead to me thinking "Why would I want to be part of a group, from which I would have to fear this?"
God, I don't remember. It was a hundred years ago. Someone told me.
The only thing I remember, personally, is that your dad was a total hottie. No wonder he wound up in RTC. They always went for the good looking ones.
Sorry. I'm sure that wasn't what you wanted to know.
No, I like that kind of humor. I'm new to the board, thought you might be a Scientologist who posts anonymously. Is there anyone like that on here?
I think the majority don't use their real name, for a myriad of reasons.
Some just arent comfortable with having their real life name associated with a past cult fuck up.
Others still have family or friends in and don't dare.
Others really are anons, who are my heroes, each and everyone for stirring the shit, where MOST (not all by a long shot) ex-$CN's feared to tread.
But, you probably knew that? Right?
Part 2
Let me start by saying that my first post and this post are just my opinions, they may or may not be true.
I was recruited by the New World Corps when I was 17. I was on TRs & Objectives at the OC Org when they first started recruiting me. They would show up to my work at FatPipeU and wait for me outside so they could talk to me on breaks and at lunch and then they would drive me home or to the org and keep talking to me. Many, many hours of recruiting.
My dad was actually trying to keep them at bay pretty hardcore. I don't think he felt I could handle the Sea Org. I was kind of a mess back then. One of my recruiters actually wrote a KR on him because he turned her away from our front door so sternly.
So, it was Rose Maracle, HAS at NWC International, Trevor Sales and (I think) Daniel Gardener, both recruiters, if I'm not mistaken who finally got me into the Sea Org. My main objection whenever they asked why I don't join was, "I don't want to." It didn't sound like much fun and was kind of a scary proposition.
But what happened was my dad went out of town on a business trip for two weeks and that's when the recruiters really poured on the coals. Trevor and Daniel stayed at my house one night in an effort to coach me through convincing my dad to sign the paper work. They couldn't wait the 6 months until I turned 18, apparently. My dad raged on the phone. He was pissed the fuck off. But I kept using my TRs on him and that enraged him further. Nothing worse than using TRs on a person who knows what they are when they're pissed. No success there.
The recruiters took me down to CC Int to show me around. This is where they were going to station me, they said. NWC CCI. It was getting late. We were at the make or break point. I called my dad again. He had demands. I was to finish my TRs and Objectives before going in. He knew I wouldn't be able to finish them once I joined. I told him that sounded reasonable and stopped using TRs on him and just talked to him like I normally would. He finally got through to me to where I wasn't being the recruiter's puppet anymore.
I had called my dad from an unused office and private office, so I went out to tell the recruiters that I wanted to wait until I finished TRs and Objectives. They were crestfallen. My dad had sold me, not the other way around. They convinced me to call him back up and convince him to let me join with the promise that I could hop right back on TRs and Objectives right after I finished the Estates Project Force. He finally conceded. He mentioned that the reason he was letting me do this was because I started to talk to him like a normal person finally.
And I wasn't joining because I wanted to. I made that clear to everyone along the way. "I absolutely don't want to join or be here. I'm only doing it because I think it's the right thing to do." They let me join anyways.
When I was packing, they told me, "Bring lots of socks." I had no idea why and I still don't. When I got there, I had way too many socks.
I was first to do the CC EPF and then the FLO EPF. I took 3 months to complete the CC EPF. It's supposed to take 3 weeks, but they had just released the new Ethics book. This would have been 2000 or 2001. The new ethics book was so much thicker than the old one, it added several weeks to my already slow progress. I study like a bat out of hell now, with really good retention, but back then I was constantly second guessing myself because the study tech and almost everything about Scientology makes you introvert onto what you're doing.
I'm going to go on a tangent here real fast. The human brain is not designed to remember every fucking little thing about every God damned policy letter. Not all of us have photographic memories. I challenge any Scientologist to pass a star rate, wait 6 months and then try to pass it again without re-reading. It's almost impossible. We /have/ to keep refreshing our memories of things or we will forget. We only have so much RAM, for fuck's sake.
The CC EPF was pretty much without incident. Besides the fact that it's a child labor force, essentially. It's a grueling schedule and you're yelled at all the time. Really great environment for an introverted kid. I remember just feeling constantly on edge and afraid that I was going to be yelled at again for something. I would constantly make mistakes and feel like the worst human being because I was letting Scientology down. I now know that in reality I was just a teenager growing up. We all make mistakes, but not all of us get screamed at for every single one.
I remember one time, returning from Christmas, I got sick with a sore throat and fever. The MLO put me in Isolation and told me to rest up. He returned the next day to see how I was doing. I told him I felt a little better and he said to rest up and return to post when I was ready. He didn't stop by the next day. My mom had sent me a care package filled with protein bars and junk. I sneaked to the EPF dorms when I knew nobody would be there and grabbed the box with all the food in it and then sneaked back to Isolation. I spent the next two days reading the books they had in there, eating the protein bars and drinking from the tap. I convinced myself that I still had sniffles. It was glorious. When I had enough rest and I was starting to feel like I was going to get in huge trouble if I didn't report back, I packed all my stuff and headed back to the MLO. I pretended that I had been waiting for him to give me the go-ahead to return to post, but I knew. He didn't say anything about it to the EPF I/C because he knew he dropped the ball and the EPF I/C didn't say a word about it. It was great. A little window of privacy and human rights for a few days.
I had a few friends that came and went and the one I remember the most was Bowie Dinkel. We were fast friends. He was supposed to go to NWC too. When we cleaned the galley, we would play the Lion King soundtrack and sing and dance along if no one else was in there with us. It was hilarious. I wonder what he's up to these days. That would be awesome if he was out of Scilonville. I know he's been out of the SO for some time.
Ugh. I remember one thing that was so wrong that I didn't think was so bad at the time. The Head Chef, I forget his actual title, was, like 36 or something and his wife was literally a 16 year old girl from Germany. He told us that he got the parents blessing and everything and explained that we are all 76 trillion years old, so it's all good. Gross!
I eventually finished the CC EPF and went up to NWC Int Headquarters at the Hollywood Guaranty Building. At that time, the SO building across from it with the cafeteria in it was still heavily under renovations. Only the exterior had been completed. I remember my first lunch up on the 6th floor of the HGB. Very crowded, very low-quality food. Like, lettuce and deli ham slices for lunch with hard boiled eggs. It was a far cry from CC food, which was always fucking delicious, especially Sunday brunch leftovers. They had a smoking room up there too. It was almost always packed and they had a high power fan blasting smoke out into the air.
Okay, part 2 over, I'm getting tired. Thanks for the positive responses!
I think the majority don't use their real name, for a myriad of reasons.
Some just arent comfortable with having their real life name associated with a past cult fuck up.
Others still have family or friends in and don't dare.
Others really are anons, who are my heroes, each and everyone for stirring the shit, where MOST (not all by a long shot) ex-$CN's feared to tread.
But, you probably knew that? Right?
I never post my opinions on the Internet under my real name. I like being able to say what I really think, without concern that some future employer or client will do an Internet search on me, and get offended by something I said. Increasingly, employers DO look for what sort of internet "presence" you have.
This is a very good rule. It's true, more and more employers Google you. I don't care if any future OR CURRENT employers read what I've written on this board though.
Oh, I'd say that's relevant! Does anyone know what she's up to these days? What exactly happened with that whole thing? What did she do?
Not exactly. I think the fact that they both refer to masturbation implies that the person is a bit of a loser in addition to being unpleasant in some way.
Hi Sam,
Like you, I was born in Scientology, but I didn't join until I was 15 years old. I found it a very rough road when I got out and tried to make my way.
A different perspective on your parents, and other people in ... we were all pretty fucked up and the the environment did not even give us to try and be decent parents. We honestly believed we were fighting for the future of the world, trying to make a better world for you ... our kids. We believed the sacrifice we made was the best thing we could do for your future. I was a huge shock to me to realize all my "sacrifices" were worthless, we weren't helping the world, possibly more hurting ... doing more bad than good. If your parents were less than ideal, try and have a bit of compassion, the environment didn't allow us to do better. I am sure you remember kids in the CEO who never had parents come and visit.
Interestingly, for me, the greatest single motivation for me to get my shit together after leaving, though it took 10 years of repeated failure to learn it, was the idea that my kids did not deserve a looser for a dad.
As a subject of HM Empire I know what that is but I am not sure Some o' these Yanks will know what that is....It's like a wanker.
More apt term would be "dick head" since British "wanker" = American "Dick"That's a Britishism too. Both have a meaning similar to "fuckhead" or "asshole" in American usage.
Vicki & Rick are living quietly & happily in Texas. Their children & grandchildren are on Facebook.
http://www.bizapedia.com/tx/THE-PHOENIX-GROUP-INC.html