Top 100 Stupid "SPEED OF PARTICLE FLOW" Moments in Scientology . For over a half-century Scientology and its 2 bombastic gurus (the "Commodore" and the "COB") have loudly proclaimed that Scientology is the "World's Fastest Growing Religion". Example: Snipped from a promo piece-- After the year 2000, the marketing slogan was updated a bit and now their spokespeople, websites and celebrities are pre-programmed to endlessly keep repeating..... Scientology is the 21st Century's Fastest Growing Religion! It's now 2016, time for another minor marketing update (free of charge!): Scientology is the World's Fastest Talking Religion! . Fast-Talk -verb: 1. To influence or persuade (someone) by talking quickly in a confident and often dishonest way. 2. To manipulate a person's thoughts and/or behavior by fluent, facile, and usually deceptive or tricky talk.