My brief SO experience was very different than yours. I could talk to any woman I liked, no one told me to stop talking to a girl or to stay away from her. The same was true for my male friends; nobody tried to put restrictions on them. I guess, it depends on SO location; I was working at Big Blue at that time. I heard that the 2D rules were very strict at Clearwater branch.
I was not planning to stay in SO for long, I just wanted to get to the Class V auditor level, and then get out. I made a decision not to date female SO members because I was not looking for a short-term relation, I wanted a stable one.
I wanted to have one-night stand with one SO girl. though; she wanted the same. I knew how to fool the e-meter, but I wasn't sure about her loyalty -- she could have written a KR on me saying that I showed her how to render the idiotic device useless. I was not afraid of RPF because no one would force me to go there, but, in case of her betrayal, my dream of becoming a NED auditor would never materialize (I didn't get to that level, anyway, but it was not because the lack of trying).
Some SO guys had sex with the outsiders, but, because of my busy work schedule and illegal gambling activities in downtown LA, I didn't have time to go to a bar and pick up a girl.