Mon ami Pierrot - It sounds like a technique based on the tech of reach and withdraw with the man doing a lot of withdrawing. Yes, that makes an awful lot of sense. I can see it working and have seen it at work without fully realizing what tech the mail was using. That "Joe average" friend of my Son's was one of just two or three guys in an Irish Dance clug with say 9 girls. The numbers were in that ratio and this Joe average, real name, Patrick, was in great demand and withdrew from all the girls who were pursuing him. It had the effect you mentioned. It seems to me that very attractive women just hate seeing a man choose another woman over them and they fight and fight hard to get that man's attention and show him that they have more to offer than the other woman. There can be a "no holds barred" war when two or more very attractive women compete for the affections of one ordinary guy. I have seen this happen a lot, once or twice, I've had two girls both go after me but I was not knowingly using the withdraw tech but just happened to use portions of it by accident or happenstance. It seems to be that attractive women are so used to being hustled by almost every man they meet that they find it refreshing and challenging to pursue a man who is ignoring them. Sometimes they will pursue a man who is gay and then when they find that out, they stop the pursuit but if a man is straight and ignores them, that brings out tremendous competitiveness in the woman.
Thanks for pointing his tech out to me. As I say, I had witnessed it happening all the time without fully realizing what I was watching but now I now. I really appreciate the hatting and will read some of your references to learn even more.
Lakey
Dear Lakey,
I'm glad you liked it
you got it right. Actually most of what you'll learn on this subject will be like "I knew that stuff, I've seen others do it, I did it too sometimes, but I didn't understand
why it worked".
Very attractive women deserve a very special treatment. Not that I'm saying there are unattractive women as some body features accepted as norm in the current society don't guarantee fun in whatever relationship. I test always the sense of humor
When you see 2 or more women with this top model like gorgeous girl amongst them you could start a conversation with all of them (or with men if she's alone surrounded by them) completely ignoring the beautiful one. Even telling her, when she says something, as she wants to be part of the conversation, while interrupting her "Could you get me a glass of water at the bar, please, I don't wish to interrupt this very interesting conversation..." You'll get attention, lol!
Beautiful women are approched all the time by men who give compliments, gifts, etc, so they test them with some "I'm out of your reach" attitude to check if that guy is worth it or if he'll behave like a doormat. Don't do what every other guy is doing and you'll notice beautifull women are easiest to date. Like - I remember I approached such a beauty, that looked like a shut up oyster, me asking "It must be awfull to be considered for your body only nobody seeing your personality, who you really are" Sigh of relief in her eyes, "how do you know?" and she spent the whole evening talking to me about men and years after we're still good friends.
It's not exactly reach and withdraw - although we could say at some level the basic interaction between a man and a woman is reach and withdraw.
It's more about "reversing the flow". You sort of steal the game from women, you unmock all their tactics they use while dealing with men. Women will love you for doing that ;-) Do it with humor, with teasing. You'll get hit on your arms, on your body while she laughs.(remember girls at school hitting your body when you were teasing them?)
Reach is important. It happened often I was sitting with a friend talking, then I said "Look, that brunette there is attracted by you" Him "you think so? oh, she looks great.." me "go and talk with her" him " ... ... ..." So I'd stand up, take my friend with me and go talk with the girl. Then I'd get away, and hours later I'd find them still talking. If he didn't reach she might have concluded
he is not interested and move on.
How to reach is important too. In social situations I often see a woman at some point asking the man "and what are you doing for living?" Then the guy, proud, starts to talk about his new car, his house renovation, his awaited business promotion, how good he's at sports, ... ... . Often the woman acknowledges then moves on. The fact she asks means she is interested then the guys wrecks it all.
Instead of turning the conversation into a boring recruitement interview I'd answer anything from "Me? I'm looking for a very rich woman who can satisfy all my very expensive needs so I don't have to work anymore" to "Shhht... don't say anyone but I'm on a secret mission from outer space to find a sexy woman specimen so we can study the rituals of fertility on Earth. Would you have any friends you could recommend?"
It goes on and on, there is no script, no set up language, when you know what the game is all about.
On the very good site given by GoNuclear you'll find books clicking on "pickup artists". You could find anything actually on bittorrent sites and on the net etc for free, but if you like it and use it, then buy it. Good to exchange when it's worth it.
The basic book that started that whole culture is Mystery's "Venusian Arts" (more at
http://www.venusianarts.com) The guy says he didn't understand anything about girls and decided to handle that ruin in his life terminatedly. He studied a lot! From zero he ended up in Time magazine and coaching Hollywood stars.
The story of Mystery is related in the book "The Game" by Neil Strauss, Rolling Stone journalist. Very fun to read, I posted an excerpt of that book, when he meets Tom Cruise at
http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?t=3373
From there on Mystery was incipient of a whole movement. Worth mentionning is David DeAngelo, sort of a marketing guru, I read once his mailing list had over a million subscribers. You can have a free subscription to his mailing list and you'll read his comments to the e-mails like "Now you're complaining you have more women than time to satisfy them all. Poor guy!" lol
David's "Double your dating" e-book is very concise and if anything that book alone gives you all you need to know about the game.
There are a lot of pickup artists having sites, books etc. The litterature they propose and bibliography books they propose range from personal stories to extensive study of NLP, Psychology and hypnosis. Amongst some books worth mentionning is Robert Greene's "The Art of Seduction" which is an extensive study ranging from seducers, womanizers to charismatic leaders. Worth to know so as to avoid unwanted traits of personality, taken up even unwittingly.
You'll recognize the good ones advocating honesty, integrity and warning about abusive use of techniques used. You could, like you did in your post, tie it all up with Scientology Tech too, why not. Tone Scale, CDEINR one, whatever.
Studying it I discovered a very interesting universe. Most guys who "got it" say beyond dating it enabled them to build their personality. Some Psychologists observe in last century while men were absorbed by their businesses boys were educated by women. Most male traits started to disappear since men stopped to go hunting, farming, socialising men amongst men. And what Mommy taught one in order to be a nice boy doesn't work in real life situations especially when dealing with women.
So some say the game enabled them to develop alpha male personality. To connect it with the topic of this thread - they developped confidence, calmness, cool power while getting their job done and well done. Better than testosterone driven brutal force with inhibited sex and inhibited eating per the antique Roman Empire Army model.
Flirting is fun. I don't stop it even when having a long term relationship. It's like I go to the supermarket. The cute girl does her cashier job bored counting items. She says "it's xxx euros, please" I might reply "thanks, and how much will that be after you give me your discount off?" now she's out of boredom "???? but I cannot give you any percentage off, sorry" me then "what a pity for you! you just ruined all your chances of anything nice going between you and me..." she laughs and from then on I get her extra smile anytime I enter the shop. Outside my girlfriend would give me a crossed look - me "What, Honey? you feel insecure because you don't now how to keep a man?" which, btw, is a common problem some women do face. But that's another subject, lol.
Have fun !
Pierrot