Disillusioned
Patron
Hi. I'm an ex-scn org exec of 8 yrs. I completed my last contract but was told i couldn't leave until my routing form was completed. One yr later, and many ethics and reg cycles later, i'd had enough of being brushed off in the hopes i'd just re-sign, so left. Then i was told i'd be declared, and was followed, staked out at my home and school, rung constantly and sent mail. My email crashed from the influx. I was really scared and contemplated going back and copping the ethics, just to feel safe, when it finally stopped one year later.
I've witnessed over the years supposed ethical sea org members reg pensioners out of their super, homes and into debt when they can't pay it off. I've been called an sp many times for using policy to point out wrong actions, though this was my post. I've not been allowed to go home despite being a day org staff who stayed back nights and wknds during so missions. I've also stalked others, harassed others, regged when i knew the person would be declared bankrupt, etc. All because i tht i was doing Ron's bidding and those higher up, in so or on the bridge knew better than me.
I've known for a fact that certain clears and ot's were no such thing, but was so afraid to speak out, there was always an explanation as to why they're still so reactive, what we were promoting we never actually saw in the final result.
And i know it changed me, my personality, from happy and outgoing to sad, withdrawn and anxious. Some years later, i remember how i enjoyed life and wish i could be that same person, having never been tricked into joining staff. "Oh yes, we have lots of people from other religions on staff, ur under no pressure to join scn at all....". Yeah right, apart from the courses, and auditing and events. "and we average about $500 a wk for pay, so it's enough to live on." Sure, but you'll need another job or two to do around the 16hr days in order to survive. It's just a big exercise in manipulation and everyone ends up losing in the end. So freakin glad i got out. My family and friends are glad to have me back!
I've witnessed over the years supposed ethical sea org members reg pensioners out of their super, homes and into debt when they can't pay it off. I've been called an sp many times for using policy to point out wrong actions, though this was my post. I've not been allowed to go home despite being a day org staff who stayed back nights and wknds during so missions. I've also stalked others, harassed others, regged when i knew the person would be declared bankrupt, etc. All because i tht i was doing Ron's bidding and those higher up, in so or on the bridge knew better than me.
I've known for a fact that certain clears and ot's were no such thing, but was so afraid to speak out, there was always an explanation as to why they're still so reactive, what we were promoting we never actually saw in the final result.
And i know it changed me, my personality, from happy and outgoing to sad, withdrawn and anxious. Some years later, i remember how i enjoyed life and wish i could be that same person, having never been tricked into joining staff. "Oh yes, we have lots of people from other religions on staff, ur under no pressure to join scn at all....". Yeah right, apart from the courses, and auditing and events. "and we average about $500 a wk for pay, so it's enough to live on." Sure, but you'll need another job or two to do around the 16hr days in order to survive. It's just a big exercise in manipulation and everyone ends up losing in the end. So freakin glad i got out. My family and friends are glad to have me back!
Disillusioned! Great screen name, very cute thread title!
to ESMB and to your OWN LIFE and FREEDOM (on every level), huh?
