Farcyde
Patron
Hello I am an ex-scientologist OEC grad class V exec who just couldn't take it any longer. I have been out for a while and have now been surfing the web for about a year now so heres my first post and i do hope not my last. Pls take it easy on me as i see your debates get very heated.
I found myself living on daily hypocrisy.... The right way (per policy which by the way from my experience is non existent in an org) or the just F@$%ing make it go right way come hell or high water.It was just miserable. My family were not Scientologists (probably my saving grace) and what i found was, I was drifting apart from them and getting more and more vehement on what there idiocy was and how they had no answers to the worlds problems "but hey i had all the answers " (Scientology).
Well when it boiled down to those answers that i thought i had, well there were non, the bridge which i vehemently protected was taken away from me due to exec Csing and constant sec checking trying to identify why i a staff member of 10 years wanted to leave.
Well let me tell you on this board now why i wanted to leave the staff of CofS. I just couldn't handle the constant emergency of situations. The hard sell to staff the hard sell to public and basically the creation of a dangerous environment for all with the threat of justice et al. Is that what i signed up for. NO I remember signing up to become better and to help other become better. I think the goal for me at the beginning was to be a kinder and more giving person (sounds a bit of a christian implant) well i can tell you that didn't happen for me. I got harder and more ridged in my perceptive and for those who weren't SCN I was probably a bit of a dick wait a real cock. My veiw-point was unwavering. Then you know what happened well the whole ridged hard unwavering view-point was run on me because i had swayed and wanted out.
and i saw the hypocrisy for what it is.
If i remember correctly the policy letter "The structure of organisation what is policy" (please forgive the mis quoting if i am its been a while and i don't have the vols any longer) The formula for expansion was " direct a channel towards attainment, put something on it and remove all stops and barriers" Stops and barriers in the CofS today is counter intension or other intension. Well that should be removed in accordance to the formula am i right, because its a barrier. Is this flawed and who directs the channel is it Ron or is it the Exec strata???
You see if we are all as SCN not cow towing to the exec expansion game then we have other intensions. So i was sec checked for my crimes and they boiled down to false report on one or two stats because it was 2 in the morning and i couldn't get hold of someone or something (justification) or taking a pen from HCO and not returning it etc etc.
I just found that the lack of autonomy in my area and the lack of motivation ie the crap pay was just not leading me to any growth.Let alone having been pulled of my bridge the only reason i got in in the first place. Its your life as i have come to know it with freedom to think freely talk freely and criticize freely or ...... scientology "and I am still trying to figure that one out." You have no freedom of movement in the Org you have no freedom of critical thought. Don't for the love of god question anyone in the SO as they are "policy".
What i just want to say is that Im a Scientologist and boy do i have a tail to tell....
I think tommy said it well
Im angry real angry.
Yes Tommy Im real angry but for what i just don't really know right now because i have no more contact with you guys, wait but hows this one for you SCN stole 10 years of my life. For what???? A world without insanity and war etc etc etc. Well what the f@%$@ is SCN doing about it. Reging the world.. Oh wait were gonna give them all a touch assist. Bud let me tell you something theres no touching at the negotiations table and all the money in the world is not gonna save scientology..
Thats it for me folks.
I found myself living on daily hypocrisy.... The right way (per policy which by the way from my experience is non existent in an org) or the just F@$%ing make it go right way come hell or high water.It was just miserable. My family were not Scientologists (probably my saving grace) and what i found was, I was drifting apart from them and getting more and more vehement on what there idiocy was and how they had no answers to the worlds problems "but hey i had all the answers " (Scientology).
Well when it boiled down to those answers that i thought i had, well there were non, the bridge which i vehemently protected was taken away from me due to exec Csing and constant sec checking trying to identify why i a staff member of 10 years wanted to leave.
Well let me tell you on this board now why i wanted to leave the staff of CofS. I just couldn't handle the constant emergency of situations. The hard sell to staff the hard sell to public and basically the creation of a dangerous environment for all with the threat of justice et al. Is that what i signed up for. NO I remember signing up to become better and to help other become better. I think the goal for me at the beginning was to be a kinder and more giving person (sounds a bit of a christian implant) well i can tell you that didn't happen for me. I got harder and more ridged in my perceptive and for those who weren't SCN I was probably a bit of a dick wait a real cock. My veiw-point was unwavering. Then you know what happened well the whole ridged hard unwavering view-point was run on me because i had swayed and wanted out.
and i saw the hypocrisy for what it is.
If i remember correctly the policy letter "The structure of organisation what is policy" (please forgive the mis quoting if i am its been a while and i don't have the vols any longer) The formula for expansion was " direct a channel towards attainment, put something on it and remove all stops and barriers" Stops and barriers in the CofS today is counter intension or other intension. Well that should be removed in accordance to the formula am i right, because its a barrier. Is this flawed and who directs the channel is it Ron or is it the Exec strata???
You see if we are all as SCN not cow towing to the exec expansion game then we have other intensions. So i was sec checked for my crimes and they boiled down to false report on one or two stats because it was 2 in the morning and i couldn't get hold of someone or something (justification) or taking a pen from HCO and not returning it etc etc.
I just found that the lack of autonomy in my area and the lack of motivation ie the crap pay was just not leading me to any growth.Let alone having been pulled of my bridge the only reason i got in in the first place. Its your life as i have come to know it with freedom to think freely talk freely and criticize freely or ...... scientology "and I am still trying to figure that one out." You have no freedom of movement in the Org you have no freedom of critical thought. Don't for the love of god question anyone in the SO as they are "policy".
What i just want to say is that Im a Scientologist and boy do i have a tail to tell....
I think tommy said it well
Im angry real angry.
Yes Tommy Im real angry but for what i just don't really know right now because i have no more contact with you guys, wait but hows this one for you SCN stole 10 years of my life. For what???? A world without insanity and war etc etc etc. Well what the f@%$@ is SCN doing about it. Reging the world.. Oh wait were gonna give them all a touch assist. Bud let me tell you something theres no touching at the negotiations table and all the money in the world is not gonna save scientology..
Thats it for me folks.
Farcyde!
