I'm not sure I can explain it. It wasn't some life changing event. The thing is in order to be there you have to have 100% faith that you are doing the right thing. You are constantly bombarded with these ideas that the world is going to shit and we are the only ones who can save it. This is the most sane group on Earth, they tell you. You have to believe it all the way. When you leave, little chinks start to appear in the wall and eventually it crumbles. That's how it went for me. Nothing Earth shattering, just all the little cracks eventually added up.
There's a PL by LRH called Keeping Scientology Working. He talks about how you can't be open-minded about Scn. If you're there, you have to be there full on. He was right. The minute you start to question, it leads to more questioning.
As for the danger, I didn't get the worst of it. I came out a little older, a lot skinnier and pretty confused about life. Nobody broke my fingers or spit on me. Our crew at EUS wouldn't have done that, I think. Maybe a couple. But I would wager that most exes are more like me than you think. Maybe because they haven't suffered the atrocities, they aren't so motivated to post about their experiences. Most of us didn't get beaten up or thrown in the hole or RPFed. Most of us just fizzled out and went home and tried to move on with things.
I still haven't shaken it all. There have been times I would have liked to talk to a therapist, but I find the idea difficult, due to my time in Scn. I don't like painkillers, even ibuprofen and I still eschew scented products. I wonder if I'll ever really throw Hubbard's yoke off my back.