50% Discount on Scientology Religious Status EXTENDED FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY!

CommunicatorIC

@IndieScieNews on Twitter
50% Discount on Scientology Religious Status EXTENDED FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY!

From Mike Rinder's Thursday Funnies.

http://www.mikerindersblog.org/thursday-funnies-84/

VLY.png


VLY2.png
 

Ogsonofgroo

Crusader
Lololol, "We ain't a business!"
Lolol @ discount basement 'religion' of LRon, hmmm, wonder how all the [strike]suckers[/strike] OldTimerS who've paid the full prices feel about all these latest (and past) bargains? Must be very disconcerting to them eh? :confused2:

There's a deep paradox in this, and this thread needs to be merged with HH's 'stupid moments' one imho.


....*still chuckilin'* ...


:eyeroll:

edit> Not merged, added, this is well worthy of its own thread imho, hilarious!
 

CommunicatorIC

@IndieScieNews on Twitter
There's a deep paradox in this, and this thread needs to be merged with HH's 'stupid moments' one imho.
I of course don't mind if the information in this thread is cross-posted to HH's 'stupid moments' thread. However, I do NOT want the threads to be merged. I find that ESMB thread titles count a lot for purposes of Google indexing, and when people Google "Scientology" or "Scientology religious" or "Scientology religious status," I want them to find this thread.

The word Scientology in an ESMB thread title is also significant if someone, like me, Googles the word Scientology with a limit of the last 24 hours, etc., in search of the latest news.
 

Ogsonofgroo

Crusader
I of course don't mind if the information in this thread is cross-posted to HH's 'stupid moments' thread. However, I do NOT want the threads to be merged. I find that ESMB thread titles count a lot for purposes of Google indexing, and when people Google "Scientology" or "Scientology religious" or "Scientology religious status," I want them to find this thread.

The word Scientology in an ESMB thread title is also significant if someone, like me, Googles the word Scientology with a limit of the last 24 hours, etc., in search of the latest news.

I agree, which is why I attempted to correct that in my post above, the term merge was used incorrectly, I apologise mon :cheers:
 

Ogsonofgroo

Crusader
Lolol, so not a scheme eh :eyeroll:

Like a pyramid scam, only nobody makes any money, but hey, STATUS! Oh goody, you can haz square too! (This will certainly be a legacy to pass onto your kids when they ask what happened to their college funds, or when the family home is re-possessed, "Hey kid, you got the best status (evil/filthy) money can buy, now stfu and eatcher beans!"


:duh::duh::duh:

:eyeroll:
 

AngeloV

Gold Meritorious Patron
Each status has a cost associated with it (and I don't know what they are). Would someone do the math and add up the cost of all of the boxes to see how much the cult wants for the Valley 'ideal org'?

Edit: Here it is (copy/paste from Excel spreadsheet)

NEW CIVILIZATION BUILDER w/honors 2500000 1 $2,500,000
NEW CIVILIZATION BUILDER 1000000 2 $2,000,000
GOLD HUMANITARIAN -- $500,000 500000 3 $1,500,000
SILVER HUMANITARIAN -- $250,000 250000 5 $1,250,000
HUMANITARIAN -- $100,000 100000 10 $1,000,000
PREMIER BENEFACTOR -- $50,000 50000 13 $650,000
VANGUARD WITH HONORS -- $20,000 20000 36 $720,000
VANGUARD -- $10,000 10000 69 $690,000
ALUMNI -- $5,000 5000 90 $450,000
HALF-ALUMNI 2500 200 $500,000
CONTRIBUTOR -- $1,000 1000 500 $500,000
Total $11,760,000
 
Last edited:

Jump

Operating teatime
Each status has a cost associated with it (and I don't know what they are). Would someone do the math and add up the cost of all of the boxes to see how much the cult wants for the Valley 'ideal org'?

Edit: Here it is (copy/paste from Excel spreadsheet)


NEW CIVILIZATION BUILDER w/honors
2500000​
1​
$2,500,000​
NEW CIVILIZATION BUILDER
1000000​
2​
$2,000,000​
GOLD HUMANITARIAN -- $500,000
500000​
3​
$1,500,000​
SILVER HUMANITARIAN -- $250,000
250000​
5​
$1,250,000​
HUMANITARIAN -- $100,000
100000​
10​
$1,000,000​
PREMIER BENEFACTOR -- $50,000
50000​
13​
$650,000​
VANGUARD WITH HONORS -- $20,000
20000​
36​
$720,000​
VANGUARD -- $10,000
10000​
69​
$690,000​
ALUMNI -- $5,000
5000​
90​
$450,000​
HALF-ALUMNI -- $2,500
2500​
200​
$500,000​
CONTRIBUTOR -- $1,000
1000​
500​
$500,000​
TOTAL
$11,760,000​


FIFY :biggrin:



One should give sufficient gravitas, by ideal formatting, to the contributions and contributors to the con. Wait did that come out as con .. it should have been confabulation, no, I mean confidence trick, oops I mean ideal org program.
 

Ogsonofgroo

Crusader
Oooo thanks guys, nice little piece of cash, never to see the light-of-day-buried, given by the goodness of their little hearts for the betterment of the planet ( lolololol), rarely returned.

And.... You get STATUS! You get a piece of paper saying what that is. If you're really generous, Davey will award you with a meaningless trophy of epic ugliness... YAY YOU!

There isn't really much difference in all this from, say, a carnival midway, spend 10$ on 'games-of-chance' , finally win, get yer cheap POS prize that cost them 25cents .... and ya know (having been there myself as a young tad), you feel good, like, you won something! Yay you! Now here's the thing I was thinking on this mangled metaphor~ The Carney needs more business, so they decide to give you 'double-your-chances' on all the games, guess what happens? Yup, when you 'win', you still get a cheap POS pile of junk worth 25cents (or less).

In culty activity I suspect you get even less, and at times it seems, people get worse and more detrimental effects due to becoming involved, and that, at least to me, puts it all into some sort of strange negative zone. But hey big guy, you got STATUS!

:eyeroll:

:duh:

:lol:
 

lotus

stubborn rebel sheep!
I don't know what's on sale (didn't read the thread)
But...50%...hum, let's see ...

*scratching balls*
*sigh*


Okay, I'll take a six pack! :yes:
 

ForLease

Maximus Squirrel
That pyramid of empty boxes looks like a big mistake to me.

Even without running the math, I thought, "Wow, they're much further away than I thought."

If I were a Valley OTC member, it would give me pause.
 

Jump

Operating teatime
Re: Church of Scientology of the Valley Completion Gift Chart

It appears the Church of Scientology of the Valley has revised their graphic. I wonder why.


http://www.mikerindersblog.org/thursday-funnies-88/


Screenshot-671.png


That promo is saying they have got their 10 humanitarian-level suckers. I wonder how the other levels are going. Hopefully the overextended mortgages and loss of retirement funds will come up in the court cases and disconnection stories - or will more cancer save the DM ass.


:shrug:
 

Jump

Operating teatime
Scientology is advertising that status in Scientology is being marked down.


I think the required interpretation is that your humanitarian status for a given level (n) of monetary extortion is being increased. Any increase is good, right?


This in mathematical notation: 0 x n = 0
 

oneonewasaracecar

Gold Meritorious Patron
I think the required interpretation is that your humanitarian status for a given level (n) of monetary extortion is being increased. Any increase is good, right?


This in mathematical notation: 0 x n = 0

MEST arithmetic always makes me laugh.
 
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