A NEW IDENTITY: THE TOMATO IN THE MIRROR

[mockingbird]

Thanks a lot guys, after seeing everything you've written I've realized I need to work on some things. Normal people have boundaries as a way to have and show respect for privacy and individuality. Those things are cornerstones of civilized human interaction. But they are destroyed in scientology as part of the cult's breaking down your precult identity and values . This helps make you vulnerable to further indoctrination.
I now know that I need to work on respecting and establishing boundaries with others . I feel the info I've been getting here is really helping me get exposed to diverse ideas on our experiences with scientology and zero in on specific areas in my life to work on.

 

[Free to shine]

Thanks a lot guys, after seeing everything you've written I've realized I need to work on some things. Normal people have boundaries as a way to have and show respect for privacy and individuality. Those things are cornerstones of civilized human interaction. But they are destroyed in scientology as part of the cult's breaking down your precult identity and values . This helps make you vulnerable to further indoctrination.
I now know that I need to work on respecting and establishing boundaries with others . I feel the info I've been getting here is really helping me get exposed to diverse ideas on our experiences with scientology and zero in on specific ares in my life to work on.

Yes you're right .... boundaries. Oh boy! I'm still working on that one.
You're doing great!

 

[oneonewasaracecar]

ah, GUILT!

It’s a human emotion that helps us stay on track – welcome to humanity… you asked for some advice, so here goes…

The simple answer to your quandary of what to do NOW is to be willing to make amends for damage you may have done, and to then be willing to see, and step up to, opportunities to do so. Those opportunities to make amends are not always what you might think they would be, so just be willing.First, remember that whatever it is you are feeling guilty about, you didn’t do it alone, so it’s only partly your responsibility – I won’t speculate on how big or small a part, because only you can accurately assess that…

… and don’t fall into the old scientology trap of thinking that because you are such a Big Being (one of the special elite chosen) that you are personally responsible for everything that happened and continues to happen to everyone everywhere, or that you and you alone are going to “save the planet” (with scientology – oh wait, now it’s FROM THE EVIL OF scientology…)… blah blah blah.

Try to relax. Spend some time sleeping, and some time contemplating life and your place in it. Let some time pass, let your mind be open to what might be revealed to you when you do NOTHING for awhile. Don’t do anything rash, especially not right now when you’re so new at making a serious change of life. Work at getting over the idea that you MUST find a solution for every problem you come across, right now (certainly before 2:00 pm this coming Thursday!).

Here’s an example of what I mean by an opportunity to make amends: for a couple of months, for a couple hours on one day a week, go serve the homeless (all those DBs that scientology would send to the gas chamber if they could get away with it…) in a soup kitchen, and just LISTEN.

QFT. You beat me to it.

Scientology convinces you that evil is good, good is evil, freedom is slavery, slavery is freedom. It's only when you are out, you realise that you were doing bad.

 

[Ho Tai]

Quite frankly this lifetime (for all ex-scientologists) has been so tame, in whole-track terms, as to be not even worth a footnote in history.

If you guys had been sitting in on my FPRD sessions you would realise what "panty waist dilettantes" you have been in terms of working for the Dark Side.

I'm not sure what you are saying. Do you believe that you were looking at past lives in your FPRD sessions? Or do you now think that the stuff in your mind during your sessions was not much different than the stories that you weave in your dreams at night?

 

[Gib]

I'm not sure what you are saying. Do you believe that you were looking at past lives in your FPRD sessions? Or do you now think that the stuff in your mind during your sessions was not much different than the stories that you weave in your dreams at night?

I myself and me,

really like a good sci fi story when it has emotions of all kinds, makes me cry sometimes and feel exhilarated and everything in between, there is a hero usually which makes me want to be like one, motivates me, the hero has characteristics we all like, thinks clearly with logic, and overcomes obstacles of unimaginable barriers

but I recognize it's a sci fi story and is not real although I recognize the emotions, and creditability and character of the hero is not me really, but maybe it is me,

but it sure makes me feel good to think I can become like the hero. And I might just be motivated to improve myself.

And that is scientology, but it costs a lot of money instead of just going to a good sci fi movie. Or reading a good motivational book, or or or............



The power of words, and the Power of The Bridge to Total Freedom.

 

[BardoThodol]

I have a bizarre question that is not meant to upset or offend but I'm asking anyway. In fiction there is a trope( reoccurring idea or theme) called the tomato in the mirror from the site tv tropes wherein a person at the end of a story realizes that they are the villain and through some twist( amnesia, multiple personalities, time travel etc.) don't know and I feel like realizing the truth of the con and unworkability of the tech and the cult's crimes has made me feel that it's an inescapable conclusion that even IF the deception and mind control relieve me of any possibility of legal culpability I have to face the fact that I still did these things and contributed to this. When we are little I think most of us form an identity as a good person in our minds because we have a conscience and know there are bad things we can't or won't do and hang onto that association as a way to be sure who we are. But I almost feel like all the mitigating factors of the crimes being hidden and coercive persuasion being used still doesn't take away from now knowing I can and have contributed to EVIL and now have an identity as a person and not just an automatic certainty that it's a good person. Does anybody else feel this way or anything similar? I mean for yourself how do you resolve the internal side of this?

Mockingbird,

Just reading your posts makes me realize you're a decent person. The good thing about your OP is that it shows you have a conscience. That you care about good and bad actions, about harming others.

Perhaps the biggest injustice in life is that only those with a conscience care. And in caring, punish themselves for transgressions others dismiss.

Beating yourself up benefits no one.

Love doesn't seek punishment.

Love seeks only well being.

You are not the villain in the mirror. Learn to love yourself as much as you want to love others and everything else you seek will follow.

Scientology demonstrates life without love or compassion. It's not a model any of us need to carry forward. Including the model of handling our overts and withholds.

 

[mockingbird]

Note to anyone who's liked any of my threads/posts please read my new thread ; it's got a link at the bottom of my signature and is to me my most important thread yet ! Thanks

 

[Leland]

Good post Mockingbird! It is part of the mind fuck of Scientology - making members hurt other members.

Part of healing from this trauma is to understand why one did what they did - how did the cult get your agreement. It is like the boiling a frog in water w/o their knowing. The water is cool ... then, slowly over time the frog is completely cooked ...but they did not feel a thing.

The complete understanding of the mind controlling tactics cults use to get members hurting, bankrupting, lying, fleecing, extorting and bribing each other in the best interest of "saving the planet".

Scientology is nothing but training OTHERS to manipulate and CAVE OTHER'S - IN!

It is sort of like the Mafia - they get you to commit crimes to show your "allegiance".

It is sinister, crazy and evil.

I have talked to more people that are "hiding out in the fringes" admit they "borrowed money from a grandparent (who they were the primary caregiver's to and had complete control of their finances over and the grandparent did not know it) to buy Scientology $ervices; thinking they would pay it back when "Scientology worked"...but it never did and they needed more and more and more....also - ex members that dipped into trust accounts w/o permission (if they were trustee's), Staff member's who dipped into "funds raised" etc...

Scientology ~ the Science of convincing members to hurt themselves and others in the best interest of $.



We are flawed, we are vulnerable, we all want to be accepted and matter. Scientology exploits all of it.

Thank you for posting this.

Of course, what you are talking about is criminal activity, and something a person could go to jail for.

Just as for instances of Child Abuse and Child Molestation, this is a area that should be exposed, talked about and to the extent possible, documented here of EXMB.