So far, I have not found a story here on ESMB that takes place in New York, probably because there are a lot more Sea Org staff at the PAC base, Flag Land Base, and Gold Base. I feel my story can contribute to the overall picture of what the EPF is like no matter where it was done.
This story is about my experience on the EPF (Estates Project Force). As any Ex-scientologist, ex-SO member can probably agree, it is where you first SEE and experience a lot of what is wrong with Scientology. But somehow you get indoctrinated with the idea that it is okay to suffer, to go without, all because you have a noble purpose of doing something great - clearing the planet.
From what I remember, the purpose of doing the EPF was to enable the new Sea Org member in-training to “confront MEST”. The idea is that if you can confront MEST (matter, energy, space, time) you can do anything. The end result is that you can make anything go right, just like an OT. Some days it was hard, and I was told “many are called and few are chosen”.
I was determined to be one of the chosen. It is my inherent nature, that when I participate in something I feel is worthwhile, I go balls-to-the-walls all the way, 100%.
I was going to be an executive in Scientology, a member of the CMO (Commodore’s Messenger Org), the elite of the Sea Org.
I was young, passionate, and optimistic. Of course I wanted world peace, wanted to help create it, and wanted to live in such a world. It was spring 1985, and I was 19 years old.
I quit my job, an excellent one, as a draftsman/designer at a civil engineering/land surveying firm. I quit college. I no longer needed to learn how to build bridges - I was going to be part of bringing the bridge of all bridges to the world, the ultimate infrastructure - The Bridge to Total Freedom.
I gave away most of my stuff, including my car. I kept my bicycle, some clothes, books, a fish tank and collection of tropical fish. I moved all my remaining belongings into a room on the 7th floor of 349 W. 48th St. New York City, which was the floor where all the CMO staff lived. It was the nicest floor with carpeting and freshly painted walls. The whole building at that time was berthing for CLO and CMO. Each floor had two common bathrooms, one for men and one for women.
My first day, I was told that I had to stay in the “guest” berthing until I finished the EPF. One of the CMO staff promised they would take care of my fish. The guest berthing area was where Class IV staff members from the EUS (east U.S.) Orgs would stay when doing training at the CLO. It was a big room on the 2nd floor at the front of the building, accommodated with a few sets of metal bunk beds. I did not bring linens, blanket, or a pillow with me, and was a bit grossed out about sleeping on dirty sheets that who knows how many people slept on? I figured it was part of the test of being able to competently “confront MEST”.
(Part 2 tomorrow)
"balls to the wall"
you got it...
used the same words myself; as kesey said "go the whole hog; don't do anything by halves"