CommunicatorIC
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Andy Porter has left the Church of Scientology and has spoken out.
[Yes, I saw this mentioned in another thread with a different thread title. I think it deserves its own thread, thread title and Google entry. YMMV]
Mike Rinder: Andy Porter Speaks
http://www.mikerindersblog.org/andy-porter-speaks/
* * * * * BEGIN EXCERPT * * * * *
So what I achieved during my 5 month stay at Flag in early 2000 was that I used 13 intensives of auditing to gain acceptance to be allowed to start on the level OT 7. And by the time I was finally found to be eligible I decided that I no longer wanted to start the level, but instead wanted to leave.
I was out of money (actually now in debt) and pleaded that I was now without means to stay and needed to return to work. I was pressured heavily to stay and start OT 7 (“You’re SO close…”) but I persisted and was finally given the green light to go. I recall the final “routing out” gauntlet of interviews and e-meter checks I had to pass: I had a form with specific people I had to get to sign off that I was okay to actually leave. I went to see each one, careful to say just the right thing, detailing how I was heading out to work hard and bring in more people to Scientology, how I would save money and return soon for a new eligibility and sec check (if I left now and returned later to start OT 7 I was required to do it all again!!) I expressed my deep regret about having to leave. Finally I made it through the checklist to the last step where I had to see someone who would interview me on the e-meter. They asked me if I was satisfied with my stay at Flag. I was sweating bullets, scared that somehow they would discover my deception and take me back into another auditing room for more interrogations. I tried to focus my attention on being away, far away from this place and free from all of it. My plan worked and my needle floated, probably for the first time since my arrival.
I was free to go.
Hurriedly I left the building and with more than one glance back to see if anyone was following me.
Post Script:
As I sit here at the keyboard I am considering why it took me so long to relate this story in its inglorious detail, what caused me to remain silent for 15 years. And there are several answers. One is that the whole incident is embarrassing. No one wants to admit to being duped. And there has been this lingering fear of reprisal. That somehow they would strike back at me.
Two things have changed this for me. One was that just last month I finally severed any last wispy tendril of connection to the church. I had been working with someone who was still in the Church and did not want to make his life more miserable.
And then last week I saw an interview with the people who made the new HBO film about Scientology “Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief” that comes out later this month. There was Mike Rinder and Paul Haggis, Alex Gibney and Lawrence Wright (all supremely Suppressive People) being interviewed and laughing. I could see that there was nothing left for me to fear. Something clicked, some charge blew, some held down 7 was erased and I finally felt free.
And that’s a good feeling.
Andy
* * * * * END EXCERPT * * * * *
[Yes, I saw this mentioned in another thread with a different thread title. I think it deserves its own thread, thread title and Google entry. YMMV]
Mike Rinder: Andy Porter Speaks
http://www.mikerindersblog.org/andy-porter-speaks/
* * * * * BEGIN EXCERPT * * * * *
So what I achieved during my 5 month stay at Flag in early 2000 was that I used 13 intensives of auditing to gain acceptance to be allowed to start on the level OT 7. And by the time I was finally found to be eligible I decided that I no longer wanted to start the level, but instead wanted to leave.
I was out of money (actually now in debt) and pleaded that I was now without means to stay and needed to return to work. I was pressured heavily to stay and start OT 7 (“You’re SO close…”) but I persisted and was finally given the green light to go. I recall the final “routing out” gauntlet of interviews and e-meter checks I had to pass: I had a form with specific people I had to get to sign off that I was okay to actually leave. I went to see each one, careful to say just the right thing, detailing how I was heading out to work hard and bring in more people to Scientology, how I would save money and return soon for a new eligibility and sec check (if I left now and returned later to start OT 7 I was required to do it all again!!) I expressed my deep regret about having to leave. Finally I made it through the checklist to the last step where I had to see someone who would interview me on the e-meter. They asked me if I was satisfied with my stay at Flag. I was sweating bullets, scared that somehow they would discover my deception and take me back into another auditing room for more interrogations. I tried to focus my attention on being away, far away from this place and free from all of it. My plan worked and my needle floated, probably for the first time since my arrival.
I was free to go.
Hurriedly I left the building and with more than one glance back to see if anyone was following me.
Post Script:
As I sit here at the keyboard I am considering why it took me so long to relate this story in its inglorious detail, what caused me to remain silent for 15 years. And there are several answers. One is that the whole incident is embarrassing. No one wants to admit to being duped. And there has been this lingering fear of reprisal. That somehow they would strike back at me.
Two things have changed this for me. One was that just last month I finally severed any last wispy tendril of connection to the church. I had been working with someone who was still in the Church and did not want to make his life more miserable.
And then last week I saw an interview with the people who made the new HBO film about Scientology “Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief” that comes out later this month. There was Mike Rinder and Paul Haggis, Alex Gibney and Lawrence Wright (all supremely Suppressive People) being interviewed and laughing. I could see that there was nothing left for me to fear. Something clicked, some charge blew, some held down 7 was erased and I finally felt free.
And that’s a good feeling.
Andy
* * * * * END EXCERPT * * * * *