Another devastating disconnection case

Lone Star

Crusader
Story tied in with the investigation of Herbalife and a rising business star who learned the trade from Kurt Feshbach.

.....The Forbes story made Aaron Smith-Levin sound like a rising star who had come out of nowhere, and with a background of his own in Scientology that he didn’t want to talk about. That was an irresistible combination for us, and we began asking around about him.

And almost immediately, we heard from his mother, who reminded us that we knew her and had written about her two years ago.

And then we realized that Aaron Smith-Levin, and his mother, were a much more fascinating story than we’d realized, one that involves some of the most devastating examples of Scientology “disconnection” that we’ve ever heard of.

And it’s a story that’s reaching its most dramatic chapter as we write these words......

Tony Ortega's article on this....

http://tonyortega.org/2014/04/18/th...ogys-attempt-to-rip-them-apart/#disqus_thread


The Forbes article.....

http://www.forbes.com/sites/nathanv...g-bill-ackman-investigate-herbalife-in-china/
 
Last edited:

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
I've just read this story and I can't help the tears. Anyone who has disconnected from another or been disconnected from, who has extended family that has been torn apart by scientology will no doubt feel the same. This has to stop ... keep talking ....

Gayle, my heart goes out to you.

The words Gayle Smith told me in 2012 continue to ring with as much resonance as they did then.

Through tears, she told me that one of the hardest things about never seeing Colin again after disconnecting from him was that at the time, Scientology had convinced her that she was actually doing him a favor

“I didn’t disconnect from my son because he was a bad SP who I needed to get away from,” she told me. “Disconnecting from them is supposed to snap them back into your life. I thought I was being good to my son.”

And now, her surviving son’s family is facing the same impossible choices.


“I want anyone who is disconnecting to think about that — will they ever really get another chance to be with that person again?”
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
I am going to copy over Derek's reply (Adam7986) to save him having to do it. It is a very powerful statement that says so much.
I am so very grateful that despite taking our family into scientology and overseas, despite all the things that I have done and said, my parents have never disconnected from me in the 50 years or so years since scientology entered our lives - and never will. They are now in their 80's and battling illness and both have apologised to me at various times for the events in our family's lives that their choices caused. Other family members have disconnected from me and this has caused huge distress. I wish they had followed my parent's example, and I had never really appreciated that simple fact - they did not disconnect - so much before.

Derek • 7 hours ago

The first part of this story about Colin is what stuck out to me. I had a lot of trouble getting through it. I identify with Colin because my parents along with my brother and sister have turned their backs on me. The disconnection was a long time coming, and I had steeled myself against it, but it is still hard to swallow. From my point of view, as a child of parents who decided their religion was more important than their child, disconnection is a difficult thing to reconcile.

I have met a lot of people who I love. In time they came to replace my family and eventually made me feel safe about leaving the cult. Knowing what that kind of unconditional love feels like, the only way I can reconcile my own parents shunning me, is that they never loved me to begin with. I don't care what kind of justification they have for their actions. I don't care what the cult or their teachings tell them about disconnecting from me. My parents even actively carried out a smear campaign against me with my extended family--trying to convince them to ditch me as well even though none of my extended family are Scientologists. How can a parent do that to their child?

Now that I understand what unconditional love feels like, it makes it even more difficult for me to understand how parents can do this to their children. I could never stop speaking to my friends. I could never just refuse to answer their phone calls and e-mails. I just...the thought of it makes my eyes misty. Lots of people have tried and tried to tell me that my parents are brainwashed and my parents are just doing what they think is right. This woman, Gayle--her son died. He died and she still stayed in Scientology for three more years. It is entirely lost on me how my parents or other people's parents can be so dispassionate towards the children that they gave birth to. How they can turn them over to an organization built on the backs of child slavery--the Sea Org.

Honestly, I will probably never understand how parents can put their children through this. Mostly because I never want to understand. By the grace of god I will live my whole life without ever understanding what can allow a parent to do something as horrible as abandoning their child.

Stop Scientology. Stop the abuse.

For more on my story please see the story that Tony Ortega originally wrote about me in May 2012: http://blogs.villagevoice.com/...

Visit my blog for even more: http://dbloch7986.blogspot.com
http://tonyortega.org/2014/04/18/th...attempt-to-rip-them-apart/#comment-1345118339

and Derek also says:

Derek • 6 hours ago

To me, this story is not about a mother losing a son. This is about Colin losing his family and dying without them. This is about Aaron's kids who will suffer in the ensuing battle. This is about Aaron being separated from his twin who he'll never see again. This is about Aaron's wife, who's parent's are going to choose between her and their grandkids or the cult. The only good outcome here is if Aaron's wife and her parents also leave the cult.
 
Last edited:

JustSheila

Crusader
Free To Shine,

Can you please edit your post re Derek and his ID here. To my knowledge, he has never revealed himself as being the same person on both IDs.

People have different reasons for anonymity, including having separate IDs. Perhaps some things on ESMB are highly personal to him and not so much on the blog. His reasons don't matter, but the fact that you've linked both IDs with his name will come up on a Google search and that does matter.

Thanks in advance for your consideration.
 

Lone Star

Crusader
Free To Shine,

Can you please edit your post re Derek and his ID here. To my knowledge, he has never revealed himself as being the same person on both IDs.

People have different reasons for anonymity, including having separate IDs. Perhaps some things on ESMB are highly personal to him and not so much on the blog. His reasons don't matter, but the fact that you've linked both IDs with his name will come up on a Google search and that does matter.

Thanks in advance for your consideration.

No he has revealed himself as Derek here.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
Free To Shine,

Can you please edit your post re Derek and his ID here. To my knowledge, he has never revealed himself as being the same person on both IDs.

People have different reasons for anonymity, including having separate IDs. Perhaps some things on ESMB are highly personal to him and not so much on the blog. His reasons don't matter, but the fact that you've linked both IDs with his name will come up on a Google search and that does matter.

Thanks in advance for your consideration.

I would never violate anyone's anonymity. Derek is quite open as to his identity and links to his blog both here and on the Bunker and has the same Avatar.
The more people read his posts, under either name, the better. That's why I included his ESMB name, we want it to come up on Google.
 
Last edited:

secretiveoldfag

Silver Meritorious Patron
This is all so sad. I was moved to tears by Derek's blog and hope his message reaches the people it needs to reach.

THIS IS WHY.
 

JustSheila

Crusader
:bump2: .... as this thread seems to have stopped in it's tracks. This is a very powerful story.


:yes: I agree. What Derek wrote was powerful, and I appreciate your posting it.

Just been busy with work the last few days. There was no intention to offend or distract; I was just mentioning. Lone Star clarified.

:carryon:
 

Purple Rain

Crusader
As much as I feel for Derek, I have to disagree that this story is not about Colin's mother. It's about her too. Gayle is also a victim. Scientology DOES prey on single mothers. It preys on lots of people. I feel sorry for her. Nobody will be castigating her more than she is herself.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
As much as I feel for Derek, I have to disagree that this story is not about Colin's mother. It's about her too. Gayle is also a victim. Scientology DOES prey on single mothers. It preys on lots of people. I feel sorry for her. Nobody will be castigating her more than she is herself.

Yes, this story is about Gayle and I guess that's what affected me, both as a mother and daughter. She can never take back that disconnection and is now facing the reverse role. I think she needs every ounce of love we can send her way, and to her family as they struggle through this all.

ps Good to see you Purple!
 

sallydannce

Gold Meritorious Patron
I don’t want to write a long piece about disconnection. I don’t even like thinking about it. But my heart has other ideas…

I have experienced “disconnection” - in several forms. To explore the ramifications of disconnection “scientology style” and also in more “worldly” styles is to get up close and intimate with pure cruelty. Pure suffering. I do not understand it nor do I think I ever will. I don’t think this level of cruelty can be intellectualised. You can look at it left, right, back and centre, but it always just comes out as painful. There is no sweet balm to ease the hurt when someone else devalues your company, your presence, by slamming the door and walking away.

I’ve thought about disconnection a lot these past few years. I lost all my connections when I left scientology. Click your fingers and look up….all your connections from the past couple of decades are gone. It brought me zero comfort when others said “well they were not real friends if they could do that!” Yeah, that may be right, but still ya hearts aches.

Scientology disconnection severs something very primal. It hits at something almost indefinable. Love. Compassion. And the finer qualities of humanity. What is so abhorrent is that scientology disconnection is based on punishment. Really it is. In life people sever relationships for various reasons – a very common one is abuse. People disappear in the middle of the night from abusive partners and begin new lives. This is healthy behaviour, imo. Women go into shelters in the middle of the night and then disappear into new lives, to heal, to learn to live and love again.

But this scientology disconnection is vile and disgusting and painful. It rips through ya like toxic poison and shatters your faith in humanity. It feels like a part of you has died or never existed. It leaves you feeling valueless, worthless, like a piece of shit to be stepped over. Scientology disconnection exudes pure intolerance. The scientology system is so damn convoluted and hypocritical! Babbling on about “human rights this and that” all the while violating them with a glossy fake smile. Damn that makes me fiery!

I do not know the pain of losing a child to the cult. I can merely skirt the edges of what that might feel like. How desperate and deep that type of pain must feel. I do however know the pain I saw in a woman’s eyes who had 2x of her children shun her. My mother. She died (last year) without any contact from 2x of my siblings for years. I listened to her, I saw her eyes. It was beyond cruel.

The morning she died I wept. For my loss. And for the fact that stupid selfish childish emotional crap had brought such cruelty into my family. I wept for the woman who was my mother and who longed to hear her children’s voices all those years and it never happened! I cried for her.

Sometimes in life associations need to be severed. There can be no denying this is sometimes the most healthy course of action. Boundaries can be forceful and strong. No matter how carefully things are accessed, how much kindness is used, it is an area of life fraught with emotional discomfort, distress.

I try to not cry for the mothers and fathers and children that this cult has fractured and destroyed the connections between. I try to stay strong, perhaps a little stoic. But how in God’s name can any of us not weep when we really face what this God damn cruel barbaric cult is doing to the love and compassion?

God damn you Hubbard!
 

Purple Rain

Crusader
Yes, this story is about Gayle and I guess that's what affected me, both as a mother and daughter. She can never take back that disconnection and is now facing the reverse role. I think she needs every ounce of love we can send her way, and to her family as they struggle through this all.

ps Good to see you Purple!

You too, lovely Free to shine! I think also people need to remember that the only choice Gayle had really was "Sophie's choice" at that point - did she lose Aaron or Colin? That's no kind of choice at all in my opinion. It's worse than not having a choice - to have to choose between one or the other of your babies. What the hell kind of choice is that? It just shows what a twisted fuck Hubbard really was.

I don’t want to write a long piece about disconnection. I don’t even like thinking about it. But my heart has other ideas…

I have experienced “disconnection” - in several forms. To explore the ramifications of disconnection “scientology style” and also in more “worldly” styles is to get up close and intimate with pure cruelty. Pure suffering. I do not understand it nor do I think I ever will. I don’t think this level of cruelty can be intellectualised. You can look at it left, right, back and centre, but it always just comes out as painful. There is no sweet balm to ease the hurt when someone else devalues your company, your presence, by slamming the door and walking away.

I’ve thought about disconnection a lot these past few years. I lost all my connections when I left scientology. Click your fingers and look up….all your connections from the past couple of decades are gone. It brought me zero comfort when others said “well they were not real friends if they could do that!” Yeah, that may be right, but still ya hearts aches.

Scientology disconnection severs something very primal. It hits at something almost indefinable. Love. Compassion. And the finer qualities of humanity. What is so abhorrent is that scientology disconnection is based on punishment. Really it is. In life people sever relationships for various reasons – a very common one is abuse. People disappear in the middle of the night from abusive partners and begin new lives. This is healthy behaviour, imo. Women go into shelters in the middle of the night and then disappear into new lives, to heal, to learn to live and love again.

But this scientology disconnection is vile and disgusting and painful. It rips through ya like toxic poison and shatters your faith in humanity. It feels like a part of you has died or never existed. It leaves you feeling valueless, worthless, like a piece of shit to be stepped over. Scientology disconnection exudes pure intolerance. The scientology system is so damn convoluted and hypocritical! Babbling on about “human rights this and that” all the while violating them with a glossy fake smile. Damn that makes me fiery!

I do not know the pain of losing a child to the cult. I can merely skirt the edges of what that might feel like. How desperate and deep that type of pain must feel. I do however know the pain I saw in a woman’s eyes who had 2x of her children shun her. My mother. She died (last year) without any contact from 2x of my siblings for years. I listened to her, I saw her eyes. It was beyond cruel.

The morning she died I wept. For my loss. And for the fact that stupid selfish childish emotional crap had brought such cruelty into my family. I wept for the woman who was my mother and who longed to hear her children’s voices all those years and it never happened! I cried for her.

Sometimes in life associations need to be severed. There can be no denying this is sometimes the most healthy course of action. Boundaries can be forceful and strong. No matter how carefully things are accessed, how much kindness is used, it is an area of life fraught with emotional discomfort, distress.

I try to not cry for the mothers and fathers and children that this cult has fractured and destroyed the connections between. I try to stay strong, perhaps a little stoic. But how in God’s name can any of us not weep when we really face what this God damn cruel barbaric cult is doing to the love and compassion?

God damn you Hubbard!

Yes indeed! God or Goddess or the Universe bless your soft heart, Sallydannce. And for all the pain your mother had with your siblings, she had the joy of you. That love and acceptance brings joy to a mother with the same depth and power that the rejection by the others brings pain. It was a beautiful gift that you gave your mum in her last days - the gift of your self and your time and your heart.

Anyway, I will keep Gayle and her family in my thoughts and hope with all my heart that Aaron's family chooses him as he did his mother. It seems that he did learn the lesson of his brother's death - that time is short and none of us can take for granted the continuing life of another. Perhaps his wife learned the same lesson - that family and friends are more important. No organised religion has any power over our eternity and they only have the power over the here and now that we give them.

The irony is that if Scientology truly did what it claimed to do, the Scientologists would show the reges and ethics officers and OSAbots the door and tell them, "Don't come crawling around here for money until you can respect my family. If you don't respect my family, you don't respect me. If you ever say another word against someone I love don't darken my doorstep again."

The fact that they are meek, mild, little weakling sheeple PROVES that Scientology does not work worth a damn.

It's not even a case of "Show me a clear" so much as "Show me a Scientologist!"

Anyway, whether it is Colin's story or Gayle's story or Aaron's story - and in truth everyone has a story - it is powerful and I'm glad Tony published it. We should definitely make this known far and wide, especially if Aaron also now loses his own family because of Scientology.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
Sallydannce, I think that is the most powerful piece I have seen written on disconnection, and with Purple's comments as well these posts are something I wish everyone who has disconnection in their lives could read. I think in these times of so many people leaving scientology, this whole subject is becoming even more important than it has been, and finding ways to deal with it and the emotions involved is so terribly important.

Sometimes it is very difficult indeed to stand back and say "they are brainwashed, they know not what they do" when as you say "Scientology disconnection severs something very primal. It hits at something almost indefinable. Love. Compassion. And the finer qualities of humanity." Because as many people here know, disconnection also involves "handling" of other people, family and friends into a mind-set that disconnection is not that important, that it is "simply a choice" and the disconnected person is making a fuss about nothing really. That is even more disrespectful, degrading and abusive as it is intended to 'make nothing' of the disconnected person, to cut their connections and reduce them to rubble.

To anyone out there reading who is struggling with this difficult scenario, please know that there is no excuse for scientology disconnection, that you have shown courage and integrity in standing up for your truth, and that is actually more important than most anything. Keep talking, keep connecting and don't lose faith in yourself because someone else wants you to.
 
Last edited:

sallydannce

Gold Meritorious Patron
I am working on writing something about human rights and scientology disconnection.

It is a system that violates legally recognised human rights. I am constructing my views on this and will post in the next day or so. I feel very strongly about all this.

It is unacceptable that this practise is allowed to continue.

I am not speaking of the emotional content that disconnection evokes. God only knows the amount of angst and suffering this practice has caused over the decades could fill tombs and tombs. I don't want to talk about feelings, not this time. I want to look at this major issue straight on and in line with internationally recognised (and ratified into domestic) laws. I want those that have been through this shit to understand that they have protection and together, maybe we can work together for change. The bully always has weaknesses. Never forget that.

This cult tried to erode (annihilate) my recognised legal human rights. So much gets lost in the emotional misery and the endless details that this cult drowns individuals in. I will explain this when I write more. Kinda busy here at the moment with a few things and can't give my full attention to it.

I'll be back with more. We gotta start talking about disconnection in new ways, in ways that will lead to change and hold the cult accountable to internationally recognised human rights. And yeah I really mean that.

p.s. Fuck you OSA!
 

TG1

Angelic Poster
Very good posts here about disconnection. Thanks to everyone. Disconnection is a nightmare.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
Tampa Bay Times have a powerful article on this disconnection.

http://www.tampabay.com/news/scient...ce-a-mother-to-choose-son-or-daughter/2170325

The Church of Scientology pressured Sara Goldberg for months to kick her son out of her life. She wouldn't do it. So the church put her on trial one night in a Scientology building in Clearwater. It was scary. Goldberg cried. She had been a devoted Scientologist for 36 years. Now her church was accusing her of committing a crime against Scientology — not "disconnecting'' from her renegade son. Goldberg had raised Nick Lister as a Scientologist. But in 2009, he befriended an ally of church whistle blowers. That made him a threat in the eyes of the church. At her trial, Goldberg felt trapped. If she didn't cut off contact with Nick, the church could label her a "suppressive person,'' someone to be shunned. Her grown daughter Ashley, a loyal Scientologist, likely would abandon her. "You're giving me Sophie's choice,'' Sara Goldberg said, sobbing. Son or daughter.
 

ThetanExterior

Gold Meritorious Patron
The CofS told me if I didn't disconnect from a certain person I wouldn't be allowed to go any further up the Bridge.

I was only in Scientology to go up the Bridge so what was I to do?

I told them to fuck off and I left.

They Declared me.

Great. All the phone calls and junk mail stopped.

They lost and I won.:thumbsup:
 
Top