Children in the Sea Org part 2

anonmom

Patron with Honors
I was in the Sea Org during the 80s when there was a transition from SO members who were discouraged not to, but still had babies before the 1986 executive directive banning children. The ED stated that if you had a baby in the SO, the parents were transferred out. Only after your child was older and signed a billion year contract themselves would the family be allowed to return.
Parents who got pregnant after the ED ban were being shipped out to orgs back then. The office I worked in “handled” this. But I observed that they were the worst orgs that were one step from being closed from lack of staff. I asked how these unproductive orgs could still be open, when they were so downstat. I was told that scientology never closes orgs under any circumstances. I could see that by sending the new parents to these orgs, it was a way to further punish them for getting pregnant and going through with the pregnancy. One couple that I knew who were both very valuable SO members and who’s only fault was wanting to keep their baby, where being shipped to the Kansas City org. That org was in very bad shape. There was only one person left on staff trying to keep the doors open. He even left as soon as they arrived. How were this young couple soon having a baby supposed to make a living out of this? I heard it said that since they were SO members, they shouldn’t have had a baby so they pulled all this in and they just had to make it go right. In other words screw them and screw them good, I was starting to see.
Before the ED was issued, some SO members did have babies. They were put in the nursery, which was nearby, but I don’t know where it was located. This was where they had the barley water babies. Hubbard claimed that it was very nutritional, even better than breast milk or formula. It was the water left from boiling barley with added sweeteners, like corn syrup. He claimed that he saved his premature newborn son only because he took him away from the hospital and doctors and fed him barley water. I clearly remember also reading in this story written by Hubbard that it was better than breast milk because there were few guernsey- type mothers. He said most breast fed babies were just starving for more food that their mothers could not naturally provide. I don’t know why he was down on formula, probably because it was more expensive than barley water or because formula is based on scientific research, not scientology which is supposed to be the answer for everything. I think it was all just part of Hubbard’s solution to separate babies from their mothers to get her back to work and away from the baby as soon as possible.
One of the nannies who worked in the nursery was in the dorm room where I stayed for my first 3 months before a space could be found for my husband and I. PAC (the big blue LA building) is in an old hospital. So I was in a small hospital room filled with 4 bunk beds, 3 levels high, yes, that was 12 women in this tiny room. I was in the middle and the nanny was in the top of our bunk. To be honest, she was probably a typical example of an SO nanny. She had mild retardation (definitely a management reject). I asked her if the babies were fed the barley water like I had read. She said, oh yes, they make a lot of barley water for them. She was kindly but clearly over worked and overwhelmed by the nursery. She worked very long hours on little sleep just like the rest of us and was quite burned out. I felt sorry for the babies being away from their parents about 15 hours or more a day and to be raised like that.
Another example of child separation from parents I witnessed. I noticed that the SO member that recruited me had a small daughter age 2 or 3. I would see him with her in the morning or late at night, but I never saw the mother. When I finally had the chance, I asked him about his daughter and where her mom was. He said very matter of factly that she was in the RPF so she wasn’t allowed to stay with them. I was pretty shocked by this but he just seemed to shrug it off. When she was out of the RPF someday, she would come back and stay with them. She would have been in the same building, but she wasn’t even allowed to be with or even see her husband and little girl. The RPFed SO members had to stay in the RPF dorms away from the other berthing and it could take several years to get out. It still haunts me how adorable that little girl was and how sad that her mother was taken away though she was still working and living in the same building. So inhumane.
Sometime after I got out of scientology, I realized that something specific had snapped inside of me that made me realize that all of the inhumane things I was witnessing were not justified by scientology goals having the greater good. All of the abuses that went on were worth it, you simply had to have that mindset to make it in the SO. The lack of sleep, the yelling and degrading, the horrible living conditions, the long hours with no days off, earning only $30 a week, being separated from family who didn’t want you there and every awful thing that happened that you normally would never have stood for, it was all worth it if scientology prevailed to save the planet. Every scientologist is indoctrinated that the ends justifies the means. That is why we put up with so much that that is wrong. Tory Christman, who used to work in OSA, says that scientologists “flip it”. When something pops up that goes against their beliefs or morals, they flip it down so they can ignore it. When you can’t flip it anymore, it will lead to your wanting to leave. Here’s my unflippable story; about 2 weeks before I left, I was sitting at my desk working on my computer like I so very often did. There was a person in my office whose job it was to handle the SO parents who got pregnant. She came storming into the office in a furious rage with a group of other people I worked with. Someone else had gotten pregnant and she was trying to handle it. What made her so mad was that the woman was actually glad that she was pregnant and she even wanted to have the baby. In fact, she was even trying to get pregnant! She and her husband were happy about it! I realized that not a lot of SO members were being routed out to have babies when there was a pregnancy; they were being coerced to the point of being forced to have an abortion. That was her real job, to convince people to abort their babies and route out the parents when she failed. I wondered how many women who were married were forced into an abortion when they normally would choose to have their baby. I soon talked with a co-worker about it (they probably saw that I needed to be handled though I tried not to get involved). She had been married and in the SO for several years and she had an abortion and thought others should too. She said it was simply off- purpose for a Sea Org member to have a baby. But the cruelty of the situation really hit me. From that point on, I knew that scientology didn’t care about anyone. They were just using people like slaves for their own personal gain. It’s a good thing for me I wasn’t routed right into a sec check and forced to have this same mindset.
Anything and I do mean anything that a person considers to have any importance, besides scientology is considered “other fish to fry”. It is probably difficult for someone who has never been involved in a cult mindset to understand this. Giving attention to your children is definitely in the “other fish” category. The bottom line is that properly raising children by giving them all of the time and energy necessary is “off policy” in the so-called church of scientology. Yet they have done so much PR to sell themselves as being pro-family. Believe me, nothing is further from the truth.
 

sallydannce

Gold Meritorious Patron
So agree with you Anonmum! Anything that "takes a person off purpose" is considered "other fish".

Years ago I recall meeting a sea org man at an advanced org - his wife had just returned from being overseas for training for about two years. This couple had a young child, the child was about one year old when the mother had left. So when the mother returned the child was about three. The poor kid did not know it's own mother! But wait, the kind loving sea org gave the newly returned mother TWO days off to get to know her child again. So kind of them! NOT!

This must be all so very difficult for someone who is not in the cult mind-set to understand how a mother could leave her little one for two years. At the time I thought "wow what an on-purpose woman". Guilty as charged on thinking like that. But I knew I could never have done that if I had had a child.

What gets me about the forced abortions of sea org woman is that abortion was, according to hubbard gospel, a low-toned form of behaviour. Nothing is what it seems in scientology. So many lies.
 

anonmom

Patron with Honors
Wow, you're right. If I couldn't do that, I would see it as my own weakness. But it would make me wonder, with so many people in the SO, why can't they send someone without kids? Looks to me now like they try to separate families.

I remember all of that book 1 stuff where hubbard talks about a mother trying to give herself an abortion. How sick!
 

free1996

Patron with Honors
I made the barley for the babies

I was an older kid about 9 or 10 yrs old in Scientology terms. Sorry correct that-age was not a consideration. All the babies were given barley formula and the older children would eat in the mess hall. We were trainned at this time how to make the barley and how to santize bottles and nipples. I even remember when the babies were teething, we had to give this gross purple stuff in their mouths. I was never a nanny, but we still had to learn these things as we all had chores. One day it would be cleaning the mop closet or the shower rooms or hallways. We had to get permission to use the phone to call your mom and sometimes the answer was no.

I always noticed that all of us were so skinny. Our diets were bad and not enough. But we also had to take vitamins everyday. So maybe that saved us.
 

The Oracle

Gold Meritorious Patron
I never saw a nursery in the Sea Org.

When I joined there was still "parent time" but I wasn't in on that.

I didn't know anything about the nursery or children.

If I had seen it I wouldn't have joined.

Parents still had infants in their offices when I joined. Sea Org members could even marry outside of the Sea Org.

I think a lot of Sea Org members didn't have a clue what was going on with those children.

In retrospect I should have known something was awfully wrong by looking at the products, the sadistic CMO kids.

But I still hold the parents responsible for abandoning the kids there.

And the men that stayed while the wives left with the babies, I saw a lot of that and it made me want to vomit. I had no respect or trust for those men.

Anyway, I gave a lot of Sea Org people money to get out while I was in, pregnant women mostly. Couples too, to get back home to their parents.

In fact they were practically routed to me.

But this inhumanity was a red flag for me too.

Just another example of how it is IMPOSSIBLE to care about the person in front of you, in that group.

I feel bad mostly for the women who leave and don't have the option anymore to have any family or experience children. Women who will waste away in old folks homes without anyone caring about them.

I feel bad about Ivan who was forced to leave his children behind with his Xwife.

I spent a recent holiday in an old folks home and took my children with me.

It was very sad to see nobody coming to visit their mother on mothers on mothers day.

A lot of people in the Sea Org disowned their parents too. Not only their children. How can you put in any exchange with your parents on a Sea Org schedule?

What about parental abuse? Nobody has even bought that up.

And these people that cast off everyone have nobody when they leave.

It's really sad and destructive.

It's a militia sacrifice type of mentality born of desperate people.

But when you are that low on the tone scale in terms of hysteria, you really cannot create a better world.

T.O.
 

free1996

Patron with Honors
response-the building connected to C.C.

The building connected to C.C. was the daycare for babies. The parents or guardians would get on a bus at PAC and come to pick us up around 11:00 pm.

I would mostly go to get my sister when I was S.O when I was 12 yrs old. Lucky for me, my guardian had a apt down the street. I don't know how they pulled that off to have the Sea Org pay for it has at this time everyone lived on base or downtown hollywood.

Alot of things went on that were bad. My mom actually wants me to pay my freeloader debt. I told her she was responsible for my upbringing and education and if Scientology was my only education, then she needs to pay it because I'm not. So we haven't talked in 10 years.

But your right, when she is old and useless to Scientology and of course has no money to just be a public Scientologist, we as her family will have to take care of her burial. I'm hoping I can just get a glimpse of her one more time before this happens. Not that I would be seeing the person she was before,but I have my memories.

One day I will tell my story.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
The building connected to C.C. was the daycare for babies. The parents or guardians would get on a bus at PAC and come to pick us up around 11:00 pm.

I would mostly go to get my sister when I was S.O when I was 12 yrs old. Lucky for me, my guardian had a apt down the street. I don't know how they pulled that off to have the Sea Org pay for it has at this time everyone lived on base or downtown hollywood.

Alot of things went on that were bad. My mom actually wants me to pay my freeloader debt. I told her she was responsible for my upbringing and education and if Scientology was my only education, then she needs to pay it because I'm not. So we haven't talked in 10 years.

But your right, when she is old and useless to Scientology and of course has no money to just be a public Scientologist, we as her family will have to take care of her burial. I'm hoping I can just get a glimpse of her one more time before this happens. Not that I would be seeing the person she was before,but I have my memories.

One day I will tell my story.

Free, you have been through so much. I doubt many people except those with similar experiences can appreciate the depth of it. Being raised that way colours every thought and action and it's a tribute to your courage and strength to be here right now. :hattip: :rose:
 

duddins

Patron Meritorious
I never saw a nursery in the Sea Org.

When I joined there was still "parent time" but I wasn't in on that.

I didn't know anything about the nursery or children.

If I had seen it I wouldn't have joined.

Parents still had infants in their offices when I joined. Sea Org members could even marry outside of the Sea Org.

I think a lot of Sea Org members didn't have a clue what was going on with those children.

In retrospect I should have known something was awfully wrong by looking at the products, the sadistic CMO kids.

But I still hold the parents responsible for abandoning the kids there.

And the men that stayed while the wives left with the babies, I saw a lot of that and it made me want to vomit. I had no respect or trust for those men.

Anyway, I gave a lot of Sea Org people money to get out while I was in, pregnant women mostly. Couples too, to get back home to their parents.

In fact they were practically routed to me.

But this inhumanity was a red flag for me too.

Just another example of how it is IMPOSSIBLE to care about the person in front of you, in that group.

I feel bad mostly for the women who leave and don't have the option anymore to have any family or experience children. Women who will waste away in old folks homes without anyone caring about them.

I feel bad about Ivan who was forced to leave his children behind with his Xwife.

I spent a recent holiday in an old folks home and took my children with me.

It was very sad to see nobody coming to visit their mother on mothers on mothers day.

A lot of people in the Sea Org disowned their parents too. Not only their children. How can you put in any exchange with your parents on a Sea Org schedule?

What about parental abuse? Nobody has even bought that up.

And these people that cast off everyone have nobody when they leave.

It's really sad and destructive.

It's a militia sacrifice type of mentality born of desperate people.

But when you are that low on the tone scale in terms of hysteria, you really cannot create a better world.

T.O.


In a nutshell TO, it is very sad to see the idea of family: children, parents, grandparents together helping out in the natural processes of birth, development, growing up and growing old....totally being dismantled for the people in the Sea Org.

It leaves some terrible scars.
 

free1996

Patron with Honors
Thanks

This is part of the reason my mom wants me to shut up as I know too much. I was through it all. I never said anything before as I wanted to run as fast as I could once I finally had enough distances from the church. It took another couple of years for my thought process to become my own, not Scientology.

But I'm almost ready to tell my story as I feel I will never have the family I once had. I think my story will highlight what really went on in there. But my story will be a book. Any money recieved from this will go into some kind of charity for survivors.
 

duddins

Patron Meritorious
The building connected to C.C. was the daycare for babies. The parents or guardians would get on a bus at PAC and come to pick us up around 11:00 pm.

I would mostly go to get my sister when I was S.O when I was 12 yrs old. Lucky for me, my guardian had a apt down the street. I don't know how they pulled that off to have the Sea Org pay for it has at this time everyone lived on base or downtown hollywood.

Alot of things went on that were bad. My mom actually wants me to pay my freeloader debt. I told her she was responsible for my upbringing and education and if Scientology was my only education, then she needs to pay it because I'm not. So we haven't talked in 10 years.

But your right, when she is old and useless to Scientology and of course has no money to just be a public Scientologist, we as her family will have to take care of her burial. I'm hoping I can just get a glimpse of her one more time before this happens. Not that I would be seeing the person she was before,but I have my memories.

One day I will tell my story.

It made me sad to read your post Free1996. I was in the SO from 75-85. As a happy and free wog, I have learned the importance of family.

I will ever hold onto the hope that changes will come, and the chasm that Scientology has created between children and their parents will be filled and that those bonds will be rebuilt between mother/father and child. Child and grandparents, sibling with sibling.

I see this destruction of the family unit as one of the greatest sins of Scientology.
 

Bea Kiddo

Crusader
I remember the CEO (building next to CCI). I remember having to take showers there. All the children together in a big room. We did not have any towels so they would make us run from one side of the room to the other in order to dry off.

----

I can't believe anybody really even knew when they were picked up. I never knew the time at all. It was very cery late at night though, that is for sure.

I know anyone over 5 had duties.

I must have really blocked out those younger years, because I barely remember them. I was 3 when my mother joined the Sea Org, in 1975.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
I remember the CEO (building next to CCI). I remember having to take showers there. All the children together in a big room. We did not have any towels so they would make us run from one side of the room to the other in order to dry off.

----

I can't believe anybody really even knew when they were picked up. I never knew the time at all. It was very cery late at night though, that is for sure.

I know anyone over 5 had duties.

I must have really blocked out those younger years, because I barely remember them. I was 3 when my mother joined the Sea Org, in 1975.

Oh Bea - that is so bizarre! :omg: I can't imagine making children run around to dry off....geez.
 

free1996

Patron with Honors
we would play superhero

We would run around the shower rooms pretending we were superman or wonder women. We didn't seem bothered that sometimes we would have towels, some times not. The girls shower room was directly across the hall from the boys. So when either doors opened, we all would laugh as we were naked!!

But this also caused problem for us kids and our curious minds. We wanted to know what was what. But we lived under the Golden Rule-so we were prohibited to explore sexuality. Alot of became so naive to sex, that when adults or older kids would molest us, we didn't know it was wrong..only that it didn't feel good.
 

anonmom

Patron with Honors
This is part of the reason my mom wants me to shut up as I know too much. I was through it all. I never said anything before as I wanted to run as fast as I could once I finally had enough distances from the church. It took another couple of years for my thought process to become my own, not Scientology.

But I'm almost ready to tell my story as I feel I will never have the family I once had. I think my story will highlight what really went on in there. But my story will be a book. Any money recieved from this will go into some kind of charity for survivors.

I would love to buy your book. You are inspirational. It's just my opinion, but I think you should repay your freeloader's debt when the Sea Org can give you back your childhood and your mom.

You deserve to write your book and make a profit for yourself. There is no reason the feel guilty about it when you are telling the truth. Giving some to charity is great, but you had to go through so much and it would be so emotionally painful to recount. It would be great if something good came out of all that you went through.
 
Last edited:

anonmom

Patron with Honors
I remember the CEO (building next to CCI). I remember having to take showers there. All the children together in a big room. We did not have any towels so they would make us run from one side of the room to the other in order to dry off.

----

I can't believe anybody really even knew when they were picked up. I never knew the time at all. It was very cery late at night though, that is for sure.

I know anyone over 5 had duties.

I must have really blocked out those younger years, because I barely remember them. I was 3 when my mother joined the Sea Org, in 1975.

I guess I am just now starting to realize what a blessing it is that I don't have any family currently in scientology. When I blew, I did it by myself. My husband, who I married 2 years before joining the SO stayed. We got divorced when he was still in and I was very out. It was very painful to go through, we had been together since high school. But he got himself out of the SO maybe 3 years after me. I didn't want to get back with him, but we do want each other to do well.

I don't even live in a city that has a scientology org or mission. I moved away years ago. I just can't deal with even being around that crap. But I wouldn't mind joining a protest, however. Especially when I read experiences like yours and Frees.
 

Corsa

Patron with Honors
My first child was born in SO, in 80. As usual then, I had been on post until the night before she was born next day. I was totally unknowing about child birth up to then, I just had heard a few things of other SO mothers. I didn't understand most of the language being spoken in the hospital. But I was lucky, I had a very good midwife taking care of me. Her name was Nightingale! She coached me through somehow, thank you again!
My husband had to go back on post, as soon as we had arrived there.

When our babygirl was 2 days old, she got jaundice and had to be put in another hospital for treatment. I didn't understand what the excitment was all about, until I was put in an ambulance, together with my baby, packed up in a babylift. I was scared to death, desperatlely trying to get my husband there to help me. He had to be on post all the time, you know.

In the other hospital, they spoke my language and got across to me, that they would keep my baby but not me. They wanted me to go home and come back maybe twice a day to nurse my child while the treatment lasted, and this would be 2 weeks.

At that point in time, I didn't have a clue, where I was, where the Org was, where my husband was. I just wanted to sit down somewhere and cry. I took farwell from my newborn. I asked my way home to the Org (no cellphones yet!), and I knew already, they would never let me go twice a day to see my child. And I would not even have money to pay bustickets, and it would be impossible to walk there, in the condition I was in then.

Well, after all, I managed to go to the hospital once every day. And she didn't take 2 weeks, but 5 days for the treatment. Then, we took her home and lay her in a borrowed craddle. We had decorated it with SO symbols, so she should recognize where she was.

When she was 3 months old, I was sent out on mission. After 3 more months, I returned, but just to be fired on the next mission. And the next, and the next.( You know: Back from mission, not yet back on post and already in briefing again. ) My husband sent me fotos and I could see, now my girl starts sitting up, walking, thats how she looks now etc. When I finally got to know her, she was nearly 2 years old.

She had a good nanny though, I must admit. A person that I trusted. Then.

In this nursery, there was no place to put children asleep. So at night time, the kids were put asleep in their parents rooms by the nannies. The idea was, the parents come home from post and find their kids sleeping in their rooms. Didn't work on all kids! Not on mine. When I got home at night, my kid was sleeping somewhere in the hallway, door to our room wide open. Everybody was carefully climbing over this little bundle on the floor which was my child, sleeping and still sucking in the sleep after having cried for some hours. It also happened that I was phoned up on post: Your child is out in the hallway and screams! Can you handle it? Well, I couldn't, as I was in the other end of town and not able to leave my post.

When she was 3, me, her father and her unborn sister blew together.
But thats another story.
 

Free to shine

Shiny & Free
My first child was born in SO, in 80. As usual then, I had been on post until the night before she was born next day. I was totally unknowing about child birth up to then, I just had heard a few things of other SO mothers. I didn't understand most of the language being spoken in the hospital. But I was lucky, I had a very good midwife taking care of me. Her name was Nightingale! She coached me through somehow, thank you again!
My husband had to go back on post, as soon as we had arrived there.

When our babygirl was 2 days old, she got jaundice and had to be put in another hospital for treatment. I didn't understand what the excitment was all about, until I was put in an ambulance, together with my baby, packed up in a babylift. I was scared to death, desperatlely trying to get my husband there to help me. He had to be on post all the time, you know.

In the other hospital, they spoke my language and got across to me, that they would keep my baby but not me. They wanted me to go home and come back maybe twice a day to nurse my child while the treatment lasted, and this would be 2 weeks.

At that point in time, I didn't have a clue, where I was, where the Org was, where my husband was. I just wanted to sit down somewhere and cry. I took farwell from my newborn. I asked my way home to the Org (no cellphones yet!), and I knew already, they would never let me go twice a day to see my child. And I would not even have money to pay bustickets, and it would be impossible to walk there, in the condition I was in then.

Well, after all, I managed to go to the hospital once every day. And she didn't take 2 weeks, but 5 days for the treatment. Then, we took her home and lay her in a borrowed craddle. We had decorated it with SO symbols, so she should recognize where she was.

When she was 3 months old, I was sent out on mission. After 3 more months, I returned, but just to be fired on the next mission. And the next, and the next.( You know: Back from mission, not yet back on post and already in briefing again. ) My husband sent me fotos and I could see, now my girl starts sitting up, walking, thats how she looks now etc. When I finally got to know her, she was nearly 2 years old.

She had a good nanny though, I must admit. A person that I trusted. Then.

In this nursery, there was no place to put children asleep. So at night time, the kids were put asleep in their parents rooms by the nannies. The idea was, the parents come home from post and find their kids sleeping in their rooms. Didn't work on all kids! Not on mine. When I got home at night, my kid was sleeping somewhere in the hallway, door to our room wide open. Everybody was carefully climbing over this little bundle on the floor which was my child, sleeping and still sucking in the sleep after having cried for some hours. It also happened that I was phoned up on post: Your child is out in the hallway and screams! Can you handle it? Well, I couldn't, as I was in the other end of town and not able to leave my post.

When she was 3, me, her father and her unborn sister blew together.
But thats another story.

OMG, that is so sad. As a mother, as a human being, I cry when I read stories like this. :bigcry:
 

duddins

Patron Meritorious
OMG, that is so sad. As a mother, as a human being, I cry when I read stories like this. :bigcry:

But it is oh so very real. When we were called on mission, we went. No questions asked. It was our duty.

I am so glad to hear you got your family out.:happydance:
 
Top