CommunicatorIC
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Daughter [16F] announced she's joined Scientology. Father has worries over this, need some help.
Obviously, any helpful advice posted here will not be seen by the father who needs help, and should be posted (or at least cross-posted) on Reddit.
Reddit Relationships: Me [45M]. Daughter [16F] announced she's joined Scientology. I have worries over this, need some help.
http://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/2rycre/me_45m_daughter_16f_announced_shes_joined/
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OK, using a throwaway here, but this issue is troubling me. Anonymity is needed due to the content of this topic, it being a sensitive issue and all.
Last night over dinner, we were talking about how our day was, what we'd been up to at work etc., our plans for the weekend and our daughter then told us she had something important to say.
Our daughter is in college (over here in the UK it is an institution of further education at an intermediate level (in the UK, typically teaching those aged 16 to 19) or an institution for adult education at a basic or intermediate level (teaching those of any age). Mentioned this since I'm aware some readers may not even live in the UK, on here.
I was both hopeful and worried, hopeful that it was something exciting, but worried it might be something shocking like "I'm pregnant" (she is sexually-active, then again she is college-age, we know that as she's told us herself), or "I have an STD." Guess those are normal parental worries when you have a teenage daughter.
She's a lovely girl, we really love her, and want the best for her.
It was something neither me or my wife [her biological mum, not a step-parent] had expected - she told us she's joined Scientology and is going to become a Scientologist.
I've heard a lot of negative things about the group, seen the now-notorious Panorama documentary - it's on YouTube if you know where to look, and I'll be honest, I have worries. However, back then, when I saw it, to me, it was just another documentary on an issue in society, I didn't expect it to happen to our family.
I do know for a fact that Scientology is followed by people like Tom Cruise, Juliette Lewis etc. and that's probably one reason why she joined, and they're controversial too.
I've also heard claims that people in big black SUVs, about as big as a Range Rover, follow and harass people who leave Scientology. Is it realistic to think this will happen? If she decides to leave, could she be harassed by them, like how Tommie Davis harassed John Sweeney on Panorama?
I read online the following things happen to people who leave or speak out against Scientology, but apart from the news, how often have they happened without publicity. The list I read included:
* Phone the critic's parents or family members
* Stage a picket outside the critic's home
* Contact the critic's employer and attempt to get them fired
* Contact the critic's ISP and attempt to get their account shut down
* Kill the critic's pets, or leave dead animals on their doorstep
* Spread libellous leaflets around the critic's neighbourhood
* Sue the critic
(if the critic is an ex-Scientologist) reveal infomation from the critic's confidential confessional folders
DA the critic
Investigate the critic
Support the enemies of the critic (if, for example, the critic is involved in a messy divorce, support their spouse)
Dig up dirt on the critic using spies
Infiltrate a person close to the critic to report on them
Frame the critic
Our family are non-religious - well, we celebrate Christmas, but it's an end-of-year festival not a religious one, so this has surprised us. Our daughter joining Scientology, that is, not celebrating Christmas, sorry, poor grammar there.
Our daughter doesn't have that many friends, in college anyway, so that could be a possible motivation for joining.
For now, I've taken the approach of "take-it-day-by-day", and wait for her to discuss the topic.
Are my concerns valid? Have I done the right thing? I am not criticizing her or saying her religion is "wrong", I am just trying to understand this topic.
I am aware this is a controversial issue, but am seeking advice on the best way to proceed. I could just read about Scientology on Wikipedia (well, I have partially) but that won't always be useful, will it?
I think, but aren't certain, that this is a bit more than teenage experimentation; aren't people recruited into Scientology at any age.
It would be interesting to hear what your experiences are regarding this topic, since the issue is a controversial one, I appreciate that, and it's a first for our family. Please, no harassment, trolling, whatever, I come here for serious advice, this is a serious topic; go elsewhere if you consider this to be funny.
tl;dr: Our daughter announced she's become a Scientologist yesterday, this has worried us. Could do with advice.
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EDITED TO ADD THAT KOOKABOURA POSTED A LINK TO THIS THREAD TO THE REDDIT THREAD:
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationsh...5m_daughter_16f_announced_shes_joined/cnl276x
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Kookaboura 1 point 6 minutes ago
Perhaps you should visit this thread at the Ex Scientologist Message Board :
http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthre...ned-Scientology-Father-has-worries-needs-help
The community at ESMB has provided advice to people who have loved ones involved with the cult (make no mistake, that's what it is). You can also find many stories of people who were once involved, both in the past and relatively recently, get an idea of what it is exactly that they do in their courses, and what their peculiar jargon means.
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Obviously, any helpful advice posted here will not be seen by the father who needs help, and should be posted (or at least cross-posted) on Reddit.
Reddit Relationships: Me [45M]. Daughter [16F] announced she's joined Scientology. I have worries over this, need some help.
http://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/2rycre/me_45m_daughter_16f_announced_shes_joined/
* * * * * BEGIN QUOTATION * * * * *
OK, using a throwaway here, but this issue is troubling me. Anonymity is needed due to the content of this topic, it being a sensitive issue and all.
Last night over dinner, we were talking about how our day was, what we'd been up to at work etc., our plans for the weekend and our daughter then told us she had something important to say.
Our daughter is in college (over here in the UK it is an institution of further education at an intermediate level (in the UK, typically teaching those aged 16 to 19) or an institution for adult education at a basic or intermediate level (teaching those of any age). Mentioned this since I'm aware some readers may not even live in the UK, on here.
I was both hopeful and worried, hopeful that it was something exciting, but worried it might be something shocking like "I'm pregnant" (she is sexually-active, then again she is college-age, we know that as she's told us herself), or "I have an STD." Guess those are normal parental worries when you have a teenage daughter.
She's a lovely girl, we really love her, and want the best for her.
It was something neither me or my wife [her biological mum, not a step-parent] had expected - she told us she's joined Scientology and is going to become a Scientologist.
I've heard a lot of negative things about the group, seen the now-notorious Panorama documentary - it's on YouTube if you know where to look, and I'll be honest, I have worries. However, back then, when I saw it, to me, it was just another documentary on an issue in society, I didn't expect it to happen to our family.
I do know for a fact that Scientology is followed by people like Tom Cruise, Juliette Lewis etc. and that's probably one reason why she joined, and they're controversial too.
I've also heard claims that people in big black SUVs, about as big as a Range Rover, follow and harass people who leave Scientology. Is it realistic to think this will happen? If she decides to leave, could she be harassed by them, like how Tommie Davis harassed John Sweeney on Panorama?
I read online the following things happen to people who leave or speak out against Scientology, but apart from the news, how often have they happened without publicity. The list I read included:
* Phone the critic's parents or family members
* Stage a picket outside the critic's home
* Contact the critic's employer and attempt to get them fired
* Contact the critic's ISP and attempt to get their account shut down
* Kill the critic's pets, or leave dead animals on their doorstep
* Spread libellous leaflets around the critic's neighbourhood
* Sue the critic
(if the critic is an ex-Scientologist) reveal infomation from the critic's confidential confessional folders
DA the critic
Investigate the critic
Support the enemies of the critic (if, for example, the critic is involved in a messy divorce, support their spouse)
Dig up dirt on the critic using spies
Infiltrate a person close to the critic to report on them
Frame the critic
Our family are non-religious - well, we celebrate Christmas, but it's an end-of-year festival not a religious one, so this has surprised us. Our daughter joining Scientology, that is, not celebrating Christmas, sorry, poor grammar there.
Our daughter doesn't have that many friends, in college anyway, so that could be a possible motivation for joining.
For now, I've taken the approach of "take-it-day-by-day", and wait for her to discuss the topic.
Are my concerns valid? Have I done the right thing? I am not criticizing her or saying her religion is "wrong", I am just trying to understand this topic.
I am aware this is a controversial issue, but am seeking advice on the best way to proceed. I could just read about Scientology on Wikipedia (well, I have partially) but that won't always be useful, will it?
I think, but aren't certain, that this is a bit more than teenage experimentation; aren't people recruited into Scientology at any age.
It would be interesting to hear what your experiences are regarding this topic, since the issue is a controversial one, I appreciate that, and it's a first for our family. Please, no harassment, trolling, whatever, I come here for serious advice, this is a serious topic; go elsewhere if you consider this to be funny.
tl;dr: Our daughter announced she's become a Scientologist yesterday, this has worried us. Could do with advice.
* * * * * END QUOTATION * * * * *
EDITED TO ADD THAT KOOKABOURA POSTED A LINK TO THIS THREAD TO THE REDDIT THREAD:
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationsh...5m_daughter_16f_announced_shes_joined/cnl276x
* * * * * BEGIN QUOTATION * * * * *
Kookaboura 1 point 6 minutes ago
Perhaps you should visit this thread at the Ex Scientologist Message Board :
http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthre...ned-Scientology-Father-has-worries-needs-help
The community at ESMB has provided advice to people who have loved ones involved with the cult (make no mistake, that's what it is). You can also find many stories of people who were once involved, both in the past and relatively recently, get an idea of what it is exactly that they do in their courses, and what their peculiar jargon means.
* * * * * END QUOTATION * * * * *
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