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Well, it sounds like you need a comforting thought. Here's one. . .
Think of all the Scientologists who worked and slaved and borrowed and put themselves in deep debt and bankruptcy in order to donate money to the IAS. Let's say 50 different Scientologists donating an avg. of $50,000 each ($ 2.5M)
And think of that $2.5M going into the IAS' bank account.
Then later we follow the $2.5M as it is paid to Debbie Cook. So that she will not tell the incriminating and devastating secrets that she knows about how Scientology cons, coerces and defrauds Scientologists out of their money for the IAS hoax.
Meanwhile, those donating Scientologists are still deeply in debt, paying on 2nd and 3rd mortgages, trying to take solace in the idea that they have attained the status of "HUMANITARIAN".
But their "humanitarian" sacrifice is in Debbie Cook's bank account and she is using the money to buy expensive clothes, cars, real estate and jewelry.
Scientology: It's kind of confusing until you realize that it is only made up of 2 things. Lies and money. The Scientologist pays the 2nd one (money) for the first one (lies). And occasionally (when there is a legal settlement for Scientology's crimes) the COS pays the 2nd one (money) for silence about the first one (lies).
Feel better? LOL