Vittorio
Patron Meritorious
To reader's of this board,
I just wanted to share an experience I had recently which gave me a huge mental shift. It's an example of hurt being given under the guise of help.
I recently started seeing someone who admitted they were in therapy. On our third outing I became vulnerable in said person's presence; I started to suffer from a series of epileptic seizures and badly. As they were not tonic-clonic, I assumed that it would pass like normal. He did offer to call an ambulance and as these seizures come and go I declined. Having already made grand assumptions about me that day already (saying my weight loss was due to anxiety (it's not; it's a side affect of Keppra) and continually saying "I advocate therapy"), when I was in pain and distress he had a cascade of abuse ready for me "all I see in your eye's is emotional trauma" "are you sure you are not blocking thoughts" "I advocate therapy, I cannot relate to what your going through" and a load of old crap about the anxiety attacks he used to get. When my seizure subsided he said with a slight grin "maybe next time you'd be better off with someone who doesn't find it funny" and "you need to develop a personality, humor and rhetoric". He tried to make me feel like I was going crazy with endless statements and a reassurance that he had had "Existential therapy for six months".
I was quite traumatized by my contact with him and took myself back to work a short walk away before seeking medical help and ending up in hospital with a chest infection, dehydration and poor seizure control. Having tried to make sense of the situation I turned to the internet when I was discharged. What did make sense to me was that his "advice" which was designed to undermine me as a person was in complete contradiction to the outstanding care and advice given by the trained medical professionals at the hospital and also in complete contradiction to the medical condition to which I suffer as opposed to the false psychological condition he was trying to convince me I had. Also the support and care from friends and people from my community was simply overwhelming. Genuine compassion.
So what has this got to do with Scientology? Having looked over many psychological disorders and traits on the internet, I eventually came across that of the narcissist which I felt described him well. But it also reminded me of how people with deep seated beliefs will often stop people from getting professional medical help and will offer up their own unscientific jargon and nonsense as a substitute. In a phone conversation I used Scientology as a comparison; where individuals die of untreated cancer because they believe they are not following the scriptures. It could be in any religion, group, culture or mind set. If your intuition or body tells you something and it feels real and someone is trying to make you to blame or trying to stop you from getting proper care; you may very well be in the presence of a narcissist.
I'm not knocking the field of psychology wholly here; because counselling and support is often essential for people escaping abusive relations, victims of trauma/PTSD and many other things. But like Scientology, it is no substitute for proper professional care when needed. It's also a great place for a potential abuser to take a job.
Having spotted the person and his intentions so quickly, I feel somewhat empowered and more able to stop psychological and mental abuse from happening in the future. I reported him to the communal organisation to which we both belong. I'm sure some of you reading this will have been in abusive relationships where, when your on your own with someone or when your vulnerable they carefully cut you up as a guise for help because they lack any empathy or emotion.
Abuse is not OK. It's not a crime to be a victim either. Admitting that is part of the healing process, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Also, let's acknowledge the care givers, medics, volunteers and communal groups that help the vulnerable. If your being abused right now, please seek help. I went through half an hour of that during a time when I needed support; don't suffer a lifetime of it!
Cult/religious/group and familiar control, psychopathy and narcissism are chronic forms of abuse. The abuse can be endless and you cannot win against such personalities; they'll fight tooth and nail for control.
Once you have the knowledge and tools to fight back, you take control of yourself again.
I just wanted to share an experience I had recently which gave me a huge mental shift. It's an example of hurt being given under the guise of help.
I recently started seeing someone who admitted they were in therapy. On our third outing I became vulnerable in said person's presence; I started to suffer from a series of epileptic seizures and badly. As they were not tonic-clonic, I assumed that it would pass like normal. He did offer to call an ambulance and as these seizures come and go I declined. Having already made grand assumptions about me that day already (saying my weight loss was due to anxiety (it's not; it's a side affect of Keppra) and continually saying "I advocate therapy"), when I was in pain and distress he had a cascade of abuse ready for me "all I see in your eye's is emotional trauma" "are you sure you are not blocking thoughts" "I advocate therapy, I cannot relate to what your going through" and a load of old crap about the anxiety attacks he used to get. When my seizure subsided he said with a slight grin "maybe next time you'd be better off with someone who doesn't find it funny" and "you need to develop a personality, humor and rhetoric". He tried to make me feel like I was going crazy with endless statements and a reassurance that he had had "Existential therapy for six months".
I was quite traumatized by my contact with him and took myself back to work a short walk away before seeking medical help and ending up in hospital with a chest infection, dehydration and poor seizure control. Having tried to make sense of the situation I turned to the internet when I was discharged. What did make sense to me was that his "advice" which was designed to undermine me as a person was in complete contradiction to the outstanding care and advice given by the trained medical professionals at the hospital and also in complete contradiction to the medical condition to which I suffer as opposed to the false psychological condition he was trying to convince me I had. Also the support and care from friends and people from my community was simply overwhelming. Genuine compassion.
So what has this got to do with Scientology? Having looked over many psychological disorders and traits on the internet, I eventually came across that of the narcissist which I felt described him well. But it also reminded me of how people with deep seated beliefs will often stop people from getting professional medical help and will offer up their own unscientific jargon and nonsense as a substitute. In a phone conversation I used Scientology as a comparison; where individuals die of untreated cancer because they believe they are not following the scriptures. It could be in any religion, group, culture or mind set. If your intuition or body tells you something and it feels real and someone is trying to make you to blame or trying to stop you from getting proper care; you may very well be in the presence of a narcissist.
I'm not knocking the field of psychology wholly here; because counselling and support is often essential for people escaping abusive relations, victims of trauma/PTSD and many other things. But like Scientology, it is no substitute for proper professional care when needed. It's also a great place for a potential abuser to take a job.
Having spotted the person and his intentions so quickly, I feel somewhat empowered and more able to stop psychological and mental abuse from happening in the future. I reported him to the communal organisation to which we both belong. I'm sure some of you reading this will have been in abusive relationships where, when your on your own with someone or when your vulnerable they carefully cut you up as a guise for help because they lack any empathy or emotion.
Abuse is not OK. It's not a crime to be a victim either. Admitting that is part of the healing process, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Also, let's acknowledge the care givers, medics, volunteers and communal groups that help the vulnerable. If your being abused right now, please seek help. I went through half an hour of that during a time when I needed support; don't suffer a lifetime of it!
Cult/religious/group and familiar control, psychopathy and narcissism are chronic forms of abuse. The abuse can be endless and you cannot win against such personalities; they'll fight tooth and nail for control.
Once you have the knowledge and tools to fight back, you take control of yourself again.
