HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Ron never gave me a birthday present, so why was it that I was supposed to give a damn about giving Ron what he wanted for Ron's Birthday Game?
Ron wants this! Ron wants that! There's a Ron Policy, a Ron Bulletin, a Ron Flag Order, a Ron Advice bossing you around from the moment you awaken until you are fast asleep. Everywhere you look there is something Ron is ordering you to do or ordering you not to do.
Here a Ron, there a Ron, everywhere a Ron Ron.
Old McHubbard had a funnyfarm. A to E I go!
But seriously, what the hell was that all about?
I find it (now) quite completely insane to look back at what Ron told me I must do or what was expected of me.
Example. A few minutes ago I received an email from an Org with a call to all Scientologists, reminding me that Ron expects me to "DECONTAMINATE THIS AREA OF THE UNIVERSE."
WTF?
Wait, did I read that right?!!!
Yup, he even repeats it to make sure I know he wasn't kidding. "...TO CLEAN UP THIS SECTOR OF THE UNVERSE."
I live in a house on the planet earth. When I want a cheeseburger, I have to get in an earth automobile and drive to an earth restaurant and sit down in an earth chair and speak my order to an earth waitress who walks back into an earth kitchen and tells an earth cook who puts my earth burger on an earth stove and cooks it. It pretty much goes like that all day long on earth. It was like on the day I was born. And it will be like that on the day that I die. I will be on the earth.
Ron, you're a way cool super-galactic guru and everything, but how the fuck am I supposed to clean up this sector of the universe? Last time I looked, my intergalactic space ship was still in the shop for repairs from the last time I journeyed out in space to salvage a few solar systems. Maybe you should just keep your manipulative, delusional ideas to yourself from now on Ron. And tell those wacked out trekkies who work for you to stop sending me crazy emails ordering me to decontaminate this sector of the universe.
Ron, just stop telling me what the hell to do and I won't tell you what I want you to do--which is FOAD.
Wait, actually I think you may have already complied with my Command Intention.
Thank you for what you have done so far.
Thank you for what you will do in the future.
I know I can count on you."
L. Ron Hubbard
HCO PL 17 Jan 1967
An Open letter to all clears
Ron wants this! Ron wants that! There's a Ron Policy, a Ron Bulletin, a Ron Flag Order, a Ron Advice bossing you around from the moment you awaken until you are fast asleep. Everywhere you look there is something Ron is ordering you to do or ordering you not to do.
Here a Ron, there a Ron, everywhere a Ron Ron.
Old McHubbard had a funnyfarm. A to E I go!
But seriously, what the hell was that all about?
I find it (now) quite completely insane to look back at what Ron told me I must do or what was expected of me.
Example. A few minutes ago I received an email from an Org with a call to all Scientologists, reminding me that Ron expects me to "DECONTAMINATE THIS AREA OF THE UNIVERSE."
WTF?
Wait, did I read that right?!!!
Yup, he even repeats it to make sure I know he wasn't kidding. "...TO CLEAN UP THIS SECTOR OF THE UNVERSE."
I live in a house on the planet earth. When I want a cheeseburger, I have to get in an earth automobile and drive to an earth restaurant and sit down in an earth chair and speak my order to an earth waitress who walks back into an earth kitchen and tells an earth cook who puts my earth burger on an earth stove and cooks it. It pretty much goes like that all day long on earth. It was like on the day I was born. And it will be like that on the day that I die. I will be on the earth.
Ron, you're a way cool super-galactic guru and everything, but how the fuck am I supposed to clean up this sector of the universe? Last time I looked, my intergalactic space ship was still in the shop for repairs from the last time I journeyed out in space to salvage a few solar systems. Maybe you should just keep your manipulative, delusional ideas to yourself from now on Ron. And tell those wacked out trekkies who work for you to stop sending me crazy emails ordering me to decontaminate this sector of the universe.
Ron, just stop telling me what the hell to do and I won't tell you what I want you to do--which is FOAD.
Wait, actually I think you may have already complied with my Command Intention.
------------ RON'S COMMAND INTENTION BELOW (read it, drill it, fuck it!) ---------
WHAT I EXPECT OF YOU
I expect and need your help to carry out the broad mission of decontaminating this area of the universe. If you wish to help, your first duty is to protect the repute of the state of Clear by exemplary conduct. Your second duty is to attain OT as soon as possible. Your third, if you still wish to help, is to become part of the endeavor to clean up this sector of the universe and make it safe not only for ourselves but the billions of others who have been harmed...
Thank you for what you have done so far.
Thank you for what you will do in the future.
I know I can count on you."
L. Ron Hubbard
HCO PL 17 Jan 1967
An Open letter to all clears
Last edited: