Look, I agree that disconnection as applied by CoS is idiotic. Although there are some situations where it is better not to associate with. But that is not how the CoS does disconnection. The whole idea that another party, somebody else than myself, would decide who "I" am supposed to connect or disconnect is frivolous to say the least.
Friends and the people one loves are the most valuable things on earth. Never, ever let somebody take that away! Money and material things are meaningless compared to a lost friendship. I lost my best friend over 20 years ago (he died very young) and I still miss him.
It is not that I am obnoxious like somebody else suspected earlier.
No, but I do believe in freedom of making one's own mistakes. People don't learn if they are not allowed to make mistakes. And yes, they will wake up one day and realize what they have done! Once they do that, they will never be the same. You have to let them experience the sorrow, pain and shame. If it takes that to drive home the lesson, well so be it. That sounds cruel and heartless, certainly. But in the long run, now I mean long, really long run, it will make them a better person than they would have been without that heartbreaking experience.
I think that disconnection is not the end of the world. You can always reverse it, at least as long the other person is still around. Still, it is unpleasant when somebody disconnects one loves because of Scientology. Happened to me too. She didn't even reply my friendly hello on the street when I bumped into her but turned her face away. Yet, it was not the end of the world.
You have got to get over such things. For me disconnection is not an issue I would be much concerned about. It's a choice people make. Let them make it. Let them go for it, why not? Chicken are coming home to roost later