Don`t mean to derail your thread, but the abuse I have suffered in the past is WHY I`m a $cientology critic today. I was lucky to not have gotten involved in a cult, although I married an abusive man. Really, not that different.Hi Folks
I just want to introduce myself. I've been lurking for a quite a while on ESMB, and there's a bunch of incredibly bright people here. I've also learned so much about people; not just peoples experiences within Scientology, but also peoples experiences as human beings.
I had some involvement with Sci when I was 17 - 19, back in the mid 1990s.I was a collage student at the time. I did some courses, bought lots of books and did some Dianetics auditing (no emeter). They tried to pressure me to go to Saint Hill in the UK, but I managed not to get in too deeply. The staff were just quite creepy. I would smile at one of the staff members and they'd look straight through me. I'd try to make jovial conversation about life in general, and they'd switch to a topic more Hubbard friendly. I knew there was something not quite right. I asked someone on staff 'How did Hubbard die?' A fairly reasonable question I should think. But his personality completely changed and he snapped at me that Hubbard didn't die! he just left his body, and his soul, or thetan, still lives on. What a strange reaction I thought, a reaction that bordered on the irrational. And this guy was a Clear. Another time I brought a friend of mine in to see what she thought. Straight away she could see it was a scam. Calmly and diplomatically, she told the Scientologist that you simply can't expect the average person to be able to afford the cost of your services. I could see the Scientologist, also a Clear, getting redder and redder in the face, clearly reacting with what seemed to be bordering on anger. But Clears, I thought, don't have a reactive mind, and so don't get irrational. The truth is that as soon as somebody challenges or disagrees with any aspect of Scientology, The Scientologist can get as irrational as he likes. My friend and I left without purchasing anything. I'm surprised I wasn't labelled PTS because of my friend asking questions and making observations that demand honest answers and acknowledgment
So the staff made me uneasy, and the cost of their services set bells ringing in my head. Being a college student at the time I didn't always have the kind of money they were looking for. And to be honest, I can safely say that if I had of had the money, I would have handed it over to them. Sure I was interested in the human mind and in helping people, but more than anything i just wanted to belong somewhere, anywhere away from home. Having grown up in a very abusive household, I had seen Scientology as an escape. A chance to feel part of something. Something I just did not feel at home. And I think that was my primary motivation. I did voluntary work through most of my teen years - a crisis helpline for abused kids or visiting the old folks in their homes. But Scientology seemed to be offering something that addressed my needs. It's interesting that I was drawn to Scientology considering that my father had already successfully brainwashed me through his abuse, particulary the emotional and mental abuse. I'm still fighting that to this day. I really internalised everything he said.
Thanks for taking the time to read this. I sincerely hope I can contribute meaningfully to the board.
Best wishes to everyone
Young people are just SO vulnerable, and I hope that education will stop the cult from gettiing their nasty claws in them....