Hi

[Zoe]

My first post... I have been flying under the radar for years as I still have family who are in. How have others dealt with this? Obviously my family is extremely important to me, and having been raised in it they all expect me to "get back into it" at some point. But as I have had time to recover and gain perspective on my own experiences, and now that I am beginning to realize how Scn treated so many people I was close to, I am more and more outraged. I hate that I can't speak out without risking my family!

Zoe

 

[JustSheila]

Hi Zoe,

to ESMB!

You are as anonymous on this site as the information you provide, so please don't worry. Just watch that you don't give personal details and there is no reason anyone would know that you are here. I understand your caution and think you are wise to be careful. Your family is important, but it is also important that you can discuss the various things about Scientology that affected your life and may still be affecting you.

There are some wonderful folks here, as you'll soon find out. It's good to have you. Relax. You are among friends who understand.

 

[PirateAndBum]

My first post... I have been flying under the radar for years as I still have family who are in. How have others dealt with this? Obviously my family is extremely important to me, and having been raised in it they all expect me to "get back into it" at some point. But as I have had time to recover and gain perspective on my own experiences, and now that I am beginning to realize how Scn treated so many people I was close to, I am more and more outraged. I hate that I can't speak out without risking my family!

Zoe

Congratulations on your 1st post Zoe!

I didn't fly UTR. When I found out about the lies I announced my departure. Two kids disconnected and of course everyone else in the Co$ too.

Upside: no more calls, no more regging, no more events. Free to explore other studies.

If you want to keep your family I don't know that there's much you can do. If you try to get them out and are unsuccessful you can expect the disconnection to happen quicker than you can say Do bids fly.

Glad you are finding out the facts.

 

[Type4_PTS]

Hi Zoe,



It's possible that others in your family also have desires to escape from CoS as well, but they've suppressed these thoughts for the same reason as you. They don't wish to endanger familial relationships.

One thing I might do if I were in your shoes would be to get a trusted friend (who's not involved with Co$) to anonymously send a group of people, including you and your entire family, some materials which could hopefully spark a conversation amongst you, or may even create new doubts in the minds of the others.

This could be a number of different things such as content from celebrities who have exited CoS, the infamous email from Debbie Cook, Doubt Formula's that some prominent Scientologists have posted on the internet where they showed how the CoS is corrupt and grossly in violation of LRH policy.

While I personally would never get involved with Scientology either IN or OUT of the CoS, you can also anonymously send them info letting them know that Scientology IS available outside the CoS with some highly trained auditors. They could receive services for less money and less of the insanity that comes with CoS.

Many who have chosen this option eventually stopped any involvement with Scientology, but it helped them to feel that the "Bridge" was there outside CoS for them to make their escape. It was a stepping stone that some needed or felt that they needed.

 

[Zoe]

Hi Zoe,



It's possible that others in your family also have desires to escape from CoS as well, but they've suppressed these thoughts for the same reason as you. They don't wish to endanger familial relationships.

One thing I might do if I were in your shoes would be to get a trusted friend (who's not involved with Co$) to anonymously send a group of people, including you and your entire family, some materials which could hopefully spark a conversation amongst you, or may even create new doubts in the minds of the others.

This could be a number of different things such as content from celebrities who have exited CoS, the infamous email from Debbie Cook, Doubt Formula's that some prominent Scientologists have posted on the internet where they showed how the CoS is corrupt and grossly in violation of LRH policy.

While I personally would never get involved with Scientology either IN or OUT of the CoS, you can also anonymously send them info letting them know that Scientology IS available outside the CoS with some highly trained auditors. They could receive services for less money and less of the insanity that comes with CoS.

Many who have chosen this option eventually stopped any involvement with Scientology, but it helped them to feel that the "Bridge" was there outside CoS for them to make their escape. It was a stepping stone that some needed or felt that they needed.

Thank you. I have some that might listen but some that are entrenched enough that I don't think would ever leave. I have had enough of family problems from the church and at this point would rather let them do what they believe in. I've already almost lost members of my family due to church policy, and it was extremely painful/difficult, I can't imagine being the one to start it. It is interesting, learning about the outside groups - I was under the impression for so long that they had all effectively been disbanded. I really appreciate that this group exists and that there are people I can actually talk to who understand my experiences!

 

[Zoe]

Hi Zoe,

to ESMB!

You are as anonymous on this site as the information you provide, so please don't worry. Just watch that you don't give personal details and there is no reason anyone would know that you are here. I understand your caution and think you are wise to be careful. Your family is important, but it is also important that you can discuss the various things about Scientology that affected your life and may still be affecting you.

There are some wonderful folks here, as you'll soon find out. It's good to have you. Relax. You are among friends who understand.

Thank you! This is exactly what I needed to hear

 

[oneonewasaracecar]

Welcome aboard Z. I hope you have a nice time.

I have had enough of family problems from the church and at this point would rather let them do what they believe in.

I think that is a good idea.

I have to ask: Did the Leah Remini documentary influence you to come here?

 

[Dulloldfart]

Hi Zoe,

There are thousands of threads here covering pretty much anything you can think of regarding Scientology. Uncensored.
Just google any topics you are interested in along with "site:exscn.net" (without the quote marks).

Good luck.

Paul

 

[Zoe]

I have to ask: Did the Leah Remini documentary influence you to come here?

Yes! I avoided looking at any "internet entheta" for years, both when I started doubting and after my slow fade. But the (unavoidable) previews for the documentary made her feel relatable. Like, she's not a journalist, she was just a public Scientologist who probably went through something similar. I figured I'd watch the first few minutes to just see how she was going to present it, and ended up watching the whole thing straight through. I really agreed with a lot of what she presented, but there were a few things I'd never heard of, and at that point I'd broken the tabboo and spent the next 2 days reading everything I could find. It's been a therapeutic few days!

 

[dchoiceisalwaysrs]

Welcome Zoe,

I am so glad you made it here. I very much understand your outrage.
So much to say but first yes, outrage,shock, fear, and for me millions of tears and sobs as I started to learn of the betrayal and the suffering of others.
I guess you are experiencing some of the same or more.

So I say this. Take very good care of yourself and cherish and have gratitude for the freedom you now have.

Second: in your interactions with those you wish to help I think it can be helpful to listen for the disagreements and concerns they may unproded voice or through facial or other clues. Make mental note of such and ask the individual or give he/r the opportunity to come forth and expand on that with more information and or otherwise safe expression.
Fear or concerns or worries are, I would say, in every scientologist. These may not be their "ruin" ( lol but excuse me for laughing at my use of the term) but their feeling SOMEWHAT FREE of oppression and control of the Scientology mind set, educated and ' cultured in' can help a lot.

Encourage that feeling of freedom. Gently

That is obviously my opinion and rather redundant for you but no starrate check will be forthcoming. Cheers.

 

[Gib]

My first post... I have been flying under the radar for years as I still have family who are in. How have others dealt with this? Obviously my family is extremely important to me, and having been raised in it they all expect me to "get back into it" at some point. But as I have had time to recover and gain perspective on my own experiences, and now that I am beginning to realize how Scn treated so many people I was close to, I am more and more outraged. I hate that I can't speak out without risking my family!

Zoe

It can be done to get others out on a personal level. Here's how I dealt with it and what worked for me to get two of the closest family members out of scientology.

You have be a few people at the same time, you have to be Agent Provocateur and Agent Saboteur (on the mental level or critical thinking level and not illegal means) at the same time, and apply good roads and appear innocent.

You have to be Hogan and at the same time Sargent Schultz from that TV series Hogan's Hero's.

You have to subtly introduce critical thinking and doubts all the while being stupid in such a innocent question during conversations, you have to have your wits about yourself and not be judgmental or critical of scientology, you have to pretend, but be innocent and do not tell lies but ask questions without knowing the answers but yet introducing doubt or willingness to look at other sources of philosophy.

Once a person starts reading the internet, and the Mike Rinder blog and Tony Ortega blog and now at present watches Leah remini show, why things accelerate, and it's a long process, as long as you do not create antagonism in the beginning, and you have to bite your tongue during conversations and keep your cool.

Anyways, that's what worked for me.

 

[Knows]

Yes! I avoided looking at any "internet entheta" for years, both when I started doubting and after my slow fade. But the (unavoidable) previews for the documentary made her feel relatable. Like, she's not a journalist, she was just a public Scientologist who probably went through something similar. I figured I'd watch the first few minutes to just see how she was going to present it, and ended up watching the whole thing straight through. I really agreed with a lot of what she presented, but there were a few things I'd never heard of, and at that point I'd broken the tabboo and spent the next 2 days reading everything I could find. It's been a therapeutic few days!

WELCOME ZOE!! :dancer::dancer::dancer:

Glad you are out and here on EXSMB.

Some great reading here to help you "go clear....crystal clear"!!

Hope your family blows soon!! Evil cult is going down! Thanks to Hurricane Leah!

 

[Free to shine]

Welcome Zoe!

It makes me so happy to see brave people questioning, especially when there is family involved. There is a great deal to read on this site, take your time. The New Member Introductions has many stories.

 

[TheOriginalBigBlue]

The way things are going you may not have to do anything. Who goes around announcing that they are a Scientologist these days? Even TC and JT seem to want to be utr and only comment in public if prodded. You might as well wear a bright red T-shirt that says "UFO Cult Pride".

Per LRH a lower level ethics gradient is just noticing the offense. The whole world is noticing the offense.

 

[ThetanExterior]

Hi Zoe,

You are definitely not alone.

I know someone who is a member of a high-profile Scientology family but they are under the radar and even post on critical message boards like this one.

You can do the same so long as you are careful about your personal information.

Best of luck.

 

[Zoe]

The way things are going you may not have to do anything. Who goes around announcing that they are a Scientologist these days? Even TC and JT seem to want to be utr and only comment in public if prodded. You might as well wear a bright red T-shirt that says "UFO Cult Pride".

Per LRH a lower level ethics gradient is just noticing the offense. The whole world is noticing the offense.

So true! My best friend doesn't even know about my past involvement and it got super awkward one time when she was telling a story about running into people doing stress tests - she was like "They DO exist!"

I wish I could talk to my friends without fear of being ostracized. I had a hard time dating due to it (and obviously finding someone accepting of my family) and had to fudge my employment gap to get a good job.

 

[cleared cannibal]

Hi Zoe,

to ESMB!

You are as anonymous on this site as the information you provide, so please don't worry. Just watch that you don't give personal details and there is no reason anyone would know that you are here. I understand your caution and think you are wise to be careful. Your family is important, but it is also important that you can discuss the various things about Scientology that affected your life and may still be affecting you.

There are some wonderful folks here, as you'll soon find out. It's good to have you. Relax. You are among friends who understand.

Hi Zoe,

Take this seriously. My spouse is still in and I will assure you that OSA does monitor this site. I have been through a couple of sec checks because of some postings I made here. Ironically they only reconfirmed my disdain for for at least the organize COS. If the meter is so good I shouldn't have been able to pass. It has caused me to drastically curtail my Scn related postings so in that regard they have achieved their goal.

You have a lot of work a head of you if you look at all the good postings here. If I was you I would try to figure out why you drifted away in the first place. I disagree with the churches line that entheta on the internet causes doubt. One already has doubt or they wouldn't look. It don't sound like you have a lot of attention on it though so it might be a dog best left asleep.

Leah's show is not for those in for they won't look or if they do it will be from the point of that she is a SP and can and should be fair gamed. It's value is to inform the general public about Scn


Welcome

 

[TheOriginalBigBlue]

So true! My best friend doesn't even know about my past involvement and it got super awkward one time when she was telling a story about running into people doing stress tests - she was like "They DO exist!"

I wish I could talk to my friends without fear of being ostracized. I had a hard time dating due to it (and obviously finding someone accepting of my family) and had to fudge my employment gap to get a good job.

Around here we don't say "They DO exist", we say "They Live"...inside joke.

Scientologists are lying liars who lie. They are especially gifted at lying to themselves. Thinking they are oppressed and misunderstood missioned to free the unenlightened from their own ignorance foisted upon them by all kinds of things: misunderstood words, engrams, overts and withholds, whole track implants, residual drugs lodged in fat cells, dead alien body thetans and psychiatrists - is that redundant? How did the human race ever survive long enough to be saved by Scientology? LRH imagines a world where Scientology is the government, and we are supposed to want to inflict this on humanity. It would be one big RPF, so what does that make us?

The FBI raided the Church in 1977. For most people who knew anything about it it was creepy enough before then but the raids really defined it moving forward. Just because Scientologists hide the facts from themselves doesn't mean everyone else does.

Dating is very difficult. You get dumped for being weird or get into a relationship with someone who has empathy for something about Scientology which for most people would be considered to be minimally a seriously unattractive personality quirk.

Yeah, those periods of my resume were left strangely vague or difficult to verify.

The kicker is we all know on some level why this all is. The stuff just doesn't make any sense. LRH laces everything with hyperbole and unfounded assertions that can't stand up in an open debate and the whole subject is riddled with self negating conflicts in doctrine and behavior. It really is a mess and a Scientologist becomes an emissary of this mess. Even as an emissary we can't give verbal data - here's this really great thing but nooo I can't actually say what it is, you have to read or listen to LRH because I can't be trusted to repeat this BS in a way that indoctrinates you properly and if I don't indoctrinate you properly then I personally am responsible for condemning you to the muck for eternity and that would be a huge overt which would cost bookoo bucks to audit out or land me in ethics, bzz bzzz whirr whir...

You see, now you got me going and the coffee is kicking in. Does that mean I have to retreat my Purif? Damn!

 

[JustSheila]

Thank you. I have some that might listen but some that are entrenched enough that I don't think would ever leave. I have had enough of family problems from the church and at this point would rather let them do what they believe in. I've already almost lost members of my family due to church policy, and it was extremely painful/difficult, I can't imagine being the one to start it. It is interesting, learning about the outside groups - I was under the impression for so long that they had all effectively been disbanded. I really appreciate that this group exists and that there are people I can actually talk to who understand my experiences!

Bold mine. Yes, COS would not want you to know how many outside groups exist, nor how large they are. We are only one of dozens. There is an entire range of groups that have left COS with as much variation as a rainbow. Since some 98% of the people who joined Scientology have left it, there are far more people out than in, and it has been this way since at least the 80s. Too many people were used and abused there. The abuse must stop. Families should never be intentionally torn apart. Individuality and human rights should be celebrated!

This is probably the richest Board for researching information about Scientology and the easiest forum to use. It's my personal favorite. I find it easier to just Google exscn.net (with subject) than to use the exscn search function.

 

[phenomanon]

It can be done to get others out on a personal level. Here's how I dealt with it and what worked for me to get two of the closest family members out of scientology.

You have be a few people at the same time, you have to be Agent Provocateur and Agent Saboteur (on the mental level or critical thinking level and not illegal means) at the same time, and apply good roads and appear innocent.

You have to be Hogan and at the same time Sargent Schultz from that TV series Hogan's Hero's.

You have to subtly introduce critical thinking and doubts all the while being stupid in such a innocent question during conversations, you have to have your wits about yourself and not be judgmental or critical of scientology, you have to pretend, but be innocent and do not tell lies but ask questions without knowing the answers but yet introducing doubt or willingness to look at other sources of philosophy.

Once a person starts reading the internet, and the Mike Rinder blog and Tony Ortega blog and now at present watches Leah remini show, why things accelerate, and it's a long process, as long as you do not create antagonism in the beginning, and you have to bite your tongue during conversations and keep your cool.

Anyways, that's what worked for me.

In other words, you are saying that you have to compromise your reality, ignore your integrity, and skulk and simper around your family? You have to be somebody that you are not? Maybe y'all can do that.
I say it's their problem. Let them deal with it.