I need help getting my brother out

This is NOT OK !!!!

Gold Meritorious Patron
Take your brother on a day trip around your town.

Show him a ritzy neighborhood....and let him know how much the houses cost. Tell him how much the quarterly real estate taxes are.

Take him to some slums. Tell him how much it costs to live there.

Take him to the Mall. Show him how much various things cost...and what he'd have to earn to buy them.
Take him to a Car Dealership....and have him see the prices of cars.

Ask him if he'd like to have a girl friend....and how much one dinner out at a nice restaurant would cost.

Let him know that if he goes into the Sea Org.....he will learn NO SKILLs to earn a living later in life.

Let him know that College NOW.....will give him skills to earn a better living later in life.

Let him know that the Cult is "Pie in the Sky" and it is time he grew up....and became more responsible for his OWN FUTURE.

Let him know that his life is in HIS HANDS.....and that the Cult would take that all away from him .....and it might occur so slowly....( like a frog in a pot of cool water, yet to be heated ) that he might not recognize what is happening to him.

Let him know that "CULT SKILLS" are not transferable to the real world.....and his entire life is in jeopardy.....if his chooses the Cult.

Let him know that the Cult will DEMAND that he cut off all communication with his family....which they will tell him are poisonous to him.....( but in reality it is a way the Cult blocks any avenue of escape if he changes his mind....)

Let him know that any involvement with Scientology is gonna be deadly!

These are good ideas too.

Did you know he can join the military, get paid AND go to college - all at the same time?

cleared cannibal

Silver Meritorious Patron
Not sure much I have to add but some of my random thoughts.

It is damn near impossible to get some one to leave who doesn't want to or doesn't have doubts. What you are proposing is planting doubt, a very tricky thing to do with a Scn. just getting him away for a while might do it. Getting him another girlfriend would be the fast and dirty way.

I agree with Enthetan that it doesn't work in the big picture but it sort of does at first and that is the problem. The reading all the books has I fear already changed his world view from his own to at least partially Hubbard's. With this indoctrination you don't even realize it has happened.

Scn is a master at making you believe something is good when it is really bad. To use a line from one of my favorite movies, The Outlaw Josie Wales, " Don't pee down my back and tell me it is raining"

Well Scn pees down your back and makes you like it.


Hi all,

I am not an ex scientologist but my brother has been for a year. Initially it was because he moved in with his girlfriend and her parents, who are all scientologists. They got him into auditing and now he's "in love" with scientology. He's never read in his life, but has been eating up LRH's books. He relates all of his life to scientology. Recently he has broken up with his girlfriend and has left their org to move in with my other brother in another state. At this time he has not gone to their local org (we are avoiding it on purpose) but he is in communication with a Sea Org member who is calling him several times a day hounding him about getting back "on track" with his progress.

We've gotten him convinced to attend college, but meanwhile we have several months for cos to rope him back in. And he wants to go. Does anyone have advice on how to get him out? What was your "aha" moment that got you out? I'm so worried that if he gets back into the auditing they are going to label all of us as sps as I'm sure they'll interrogate what we've been filling his head with.

I will say I am amazed at how well their brainwashing works...it's incredible how narrow his vision is. There's an answer for everything which is usually "You have to read Dianetics" or "It's confidential so I don't know"

Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated!!!

In the event that it's not possible to extricate your brother from the Scientological mind set - as a true believing "public person" - you might consider this approach, if it's at all plausible...

If you're brother has artistic inclinations or show business inclinations of any kind, you might encourage him to think of himself as a potential "celebrity." Celebrities, in Scientology, don't join staff or the Sea Org and remain on the periphery of Scientology - with Scientology's encouragement.

The idea is that, some years in the future, your brother, as a successful artist, or personality, of whatever kind, would be an asset to Scientology, etc.

This would provide your brother with a comfortable justification for postponing any further involvement of a serious nature - such as joining staff or joining the Sea Org - since he's attending college so as to become an "opinion leader" so as to - way in the future - promote and assist Scientology.

If he has no money, and not much credit, then there's a limit on how much money Scientology can pull out of him.

Then, if he doesn't join the Sea Org, and remains a "public person," and is away at college, he'll have new experiences and mature.

Then, his views might change naturally over time.

Possible additional step...

Once away at college, with his excitement about Scientology slightly diminished, you might mention that you read that "tech is out in Orgs," and that "real Scientology is not done in the Scientology organization anymore," etc. The idea is to gently separate him from the organization while allowing him to hold onto the subject (books, recorded lectures) of Scientology. You might explain to him that there are people who provide auditing outside - and free from - the organization, and that the organization has "gone squirrel" (is "altering tech"), and that all auditing levels are available outside the organization at a fraction of the cost. As an example: http://www.friendsoflrh.org/

The idea is to nudge him gently away from the Scientology organization without him deciding you're a "Suppressive Person." If he were to decide you're an "SP," he might "cut comm" with you, and that would end any chance you have of influencing him.

So it's delicate.

If, in the several months before he's off to college, he doesn't spend much money, and doesn't join staff or the Sea Org - envisioning himself as a future "Scientology celebrity" - all this might just be passing phase.

That's a lot of "ifs," but it's one approach if nothing else works. :)

The Scientological Onion: http://exscn.net/content/view/178/105/index.html


Gold Meritorious Patron
He has been "indoctrinated" into Scientology and this is tough, if not impossible, to break.

I believe the best thing you could do is to say nothing and let him go. If you try to say anything about Scientology - he will disconnect and it will drive him in deeper.

Get educated and prepare yourself to protect yourself. DO NOT LEND HIM ANY MONEY NOR PROVIDE A HOME FOR HIM IF HE JOINS STAFF. Make up excuses and don't tell him it is because of Scientology - but keep it out of your family. If you have small children - educate them as to WHAT Scientology IS and what it is not.

Keep him away from all children.

Most people leave Scientology and never go back. Scientology already has hurt him in some way or he would not have left his Org.

One of the typical scenes for Scientologist's is they move around - trying various ORGS to find peace...getting manipulated, used and abused. Most people don't last long - especially if you don't give him any money or free rent.

The "defensiveness" are implanted ideas and suggestions by the Organization.

This is very good advice.


Gold Meritorious Patron
If they are calling on your land line, maybe you can have the number changed and tell your brother it has been disconnected.


Gold Meritorious Patron
I did not recommend for mysticsister's brother to read Steve Hassan's book, but intended for her to read it to understand and avoid some of the recommendations on this thread.
" A major contribution...For the first time, a skilled and ethical exit counselor has spelled out the details of the complicated yet understandable process of helping free a human being from the bondage of mental manipulation.....Steve Hassan has written a 'how to do something about it' book."

Please Mystic sister be prepared. I know that occasionally many of the recommended activities in this thread will work in some instances but making a plan that has a very high chance of success should not be, a try this try that, shot in the dark.
I would think that at least reviewing his material based on hundreds of cases he has dealt with, which are probably many more than anyone posting here, would have a lot of merit.
My apologies if I have inadvertantly insulted anyone here. That is not my intention. I just know my parents and others failed multiple times to ease me out, in the first year or so, and again later. I was in about 37 years and the 'opportunities lost' cost is a life that is but a faint shadow of what it could have been if I had so rapidly conned by the fraudulent information and bullshit promises.
All that said, a trip to break the communication with the deceivers aka the Sea Org recruiters is a good idea. But do can they reach him by cell phone?
Also he already has various cult control features embedded in his mental framework and emotional reflexes and is having those influencing/ controlling him to greater or lesser degrees from second to second or hour to hour and a lot of information you give him already has been preprogrammed to be rejected.
Lawrence Wright said it so well "a prison of belief". And the inhabitant is often unaware of how it was built and in fact thinks those on the outside are the ones in prison.
Good luck.


New Member
He is being contacted via cell phone and he keeps it on him like it's a part of him. He does not initiate conversation, they initiate it. They are calling several times a day because they are "concerned about him". With Christmas approaching we are hoping to get a break. Thank you all so much for your advice and support, it is greatly appreciated!


Gold Meritorious Patron
There are no holiday breaks for scientologists. They are open for business Dec 25th.

Wishing you the very best in getting your brother to get the facts. Bottom line, what they promise they can't deliver. Hope he can come to that understanding without wrecking his life.


Gold Meritorious Patron

Or click HERE.

Hi Sister...the link above is to a PDF copy of Miller's bio of Hubbard called Bare-Faced Messiah you can read online or download for free. Have your brother read the intro to it and see if that makes sense to him. It explains very well what it is, and how Scientologists learn an alternate story of Hubbard's life and the development of Scientology, which differs from all the records and accounts from people who knew him, including some from his own children and wives.

Explain to your brother that Scientology is not like Christianity, which has no documentation and virtually no historical evidence that Jesus even existed. Instead, Hubbard's life and the development of Scientology are very well documented.

Throw out tidbits like, "Did they tell you that LRH had a son, Quentin, who was an expert on the tech, and spent a few years on the ship with his father during the first years of the Sea Org, but killed himself when he was 22 years old?" How could that be, that Hubbard's own son, a master of the technology, would kill himself? Some of the answer to that is found in the book.

How could a new Scientologist resist not wanting to read all about Hubbard growing up and the early years of Dianetics and the Sea Org? Well, some of them are pretty quickly indoctrinated not to believe anything a non-Scientologist says, that it is all lies.

I'm not a Scientologist and never was, but I found Miller's bio of Hubbard to be fascinating. It's wild, quirky, exciting, and a real adventure to read.

Scientology seems great at first, like it has all the answers, for someone who is young or vulnerable/gullible enough to think that. Hubbard's childhood is really fascinating also, and how reality and the Church version differ.

For example, the Church used to claim (in the early years of Scientology), in their literature, Hubbard grew up on a cattle ranch which was one quarter of Montana! That is simply not true. For one thing, duh, during that time, there were no single ranches that big in Montana.

Another approach may be to just look up Xenu on wikipedia and read and discuss together with your brother, asking him if there are any errors in it. Tell him you want to know the version he was taught, and what is the right version according to the Church. If he's knew enough, he won't be on guard against learning about Xenu.

Xenu is not unimportant. Xenu is why people have engrams, which later are called "body thetans" on the OT level. So according to Hubbard, Xenu and the evil psychiatrists are responsible for all of the problems we have. It's kind of like Christians believe that we'd all be still living in the Garden of Eden, if Eve hadn't listened to the snake and disobeyed God, bringing sin into the world. And so human beings are burdened with original sin, and flawed. (Incidentally, I don't believe that crazy either.)

Keep throwing out little things like that about Hubbard or Scientology, that you may read in Bare-Faced Messiah yourself, and all you need is to find one that interests him, enough to look further. Tell him he needs to "look at both sides," and that Hubbard himself read a lot of books of all sorts, and so why shouldn't he?

Of course, you want to be sensitive to what alienates him, and try to avoid that. But this is important. He could end up stuck in Scientology for decades, and enduring all kinds of abuse.

Someone mentioned a Hassan book, but if he totally rejects the idea that Scientology is cult-like or not, he won't read that. I like the books and YouTube talks of Sam Harris, on religion in general. His main theme is that we need to question the beliefs of all religions, and how trusting and believing can be destructive. Questioning leads to awareness, opening up, and being free of irrational fears which many religions bring. He speaks plainly and eloquently, and makes so much sense if you think about what he's saying.

It's a relief to know that a person may not have to go down the rabbit hole of a religion, forever seeking answers, which in Scientology are revealed at ever more expensive levels. If your brother isn't aware of it, inform him that packages to Flag can cost upward of $40,000, once he gets to a higher level.
Thank you for posting "Bare Faced Meshiah"
I am going to read it and pass it on to others who have not read it yet. Thank you!!


Gold Meritorious Patron
There are no holiday breaks for scientologists. They are open for business Dec 25th.

Wishing you the very best in getting your brother to get the facts. Bottom line, what they promise they can't deliver. Hope he can come to that understanding without wrecking his life.

Recruits are told that they get a 3 week yearly LOA (Leave Of Absence). I was able to take a few 3 week LOAs but it became increasingly difficult to get my stats up with the work load and to find a replacement to hold my post while I was gone. Also, when you return, your area is most likely down stat or there are emergencies and you are in an instant lower condition with many weeks of hard work to catch up.

Family is POed that you don't take time off and other staff guilt trip you for leaving, especially during the holidays. If you try to use POed family as an excuse to take time off then that can be interpreted as a PTS (Potential Trouble Source) situation resulting in getting sent to ethics. If you are single with no kids then you generally end up covering while other people who are better at gaming the LOA process take off during the holidays.

Stats invariably crash during the holidays and the holidays are not an acceptable excuse so not only do Sea Org members have to work holidays but they may have to work longer and harder to keep the stats up.

Eventually I think many Sea Org members give up trying and go years without an LOA.


Gold Meritorious Patron
He is being contacted via cell phone and he keeps it on him like it's a part of him. He does not initiate conversation, they initiate it. They are calling several times a day because they are "concerned about him". With Christmas approaching we are hoping to get a break. Thank you all so much for your advice and support, it is greatly appreciated!

He is in the "love bombing stage". They are very concerned :whistling:until they get him to sign a contract to work for free for five years on staff for no pay, get money on account and SIGN A CONTRACT where he cannot get it back, sign a billion year contract to join the Sea Org...they won't stop until he tells them to stop.

Tell him that you studied cults in a college and evil, manipulative cults use "love bombing".

Ask him what is love bombing? Maybe he will look it up.

He may have a WOGNITION.

Ask him to read Bare Faced Messiah before he goes back in to Scientology. He may get information that is missing that he may need so he does not get hurt in Scientology like so many others. Tell him to watch "Going Clear" and to read "Troublemaker" by Leah Remini.


Operating teatime
He is being contacted via cell phone and he keeps it on him like it's a part of him. He does not initiate conversation, they initiate it. They are calling several times a day because they are "concerned about him". With Christmas approaching we are hoping to get a break. Thank you all so much for your advice and support, it is greatly appreciated!

His phone could get 'lost'. His phone could accidentally go through the wash, or spend 10 seconds in the microwave, or get some nailvarnish on the battery contact?

Some of these might not be good ideas...