I'm done

[afaceinthecrowd]

Hey OSA and Scn, here's song for Y'all. Emma told you something. Think about "It"...You might have to make a decision someday.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYCQWL8d9f8

 

[FoTi]

Emma.....I saw in the chat that you are working 12 hours a day. That along with your recent loss of your mother and having a family to take care of and whatever else you have to do in life......I don't know how you manage to take care of ESMB along with all of the rest of what you have to do in life. You must be Super Woman. That all looks like too much of an overload to me. In the face of all this, I don't blame you for wanting to quit, even if the idiots weren't taking pot shots at you.

I hope you can find someone to take it over who has more free time and isn't so pressed with other things. But, if not, please just keep the website up for others to come and research and read, without the posting and chat......at least that way you wouldn't have to monitor it all the time and people could still come here and read what's already been posted. This is too valuable a website to just end, or close down totally, in October.

 

[cakemaker]

If the board must close, I second Dulloldfart's suggestion to keep it as a static web site that is browsable.
The wealth of information and history is so incredibly valuable.
Even without posters, the stories and the truth will continue to heal many others.
Count me in financially to keep the server going.

Thank you Emma!

 

[FoTi]

If the board must close, I second Dulloldfart's suggestion to keep it as a static web site that is browsable.
The wealth of information and history is so incredibly valuable.
Even without posters, the stories and the truth will continue to heal many others.
Count me in financially to keep the server going.

Thank you Emma!

How did you put hair on the smoking smiley?

 

[Mimsey Borogrove]

Judging the way the smiley's hair is shaking it is seriously hung over - this is likely how it was accomplished. No need to thank me. Mimsey

[QUOTE"Hair of the dog" is a colloquial expression in the English language predominantly used to refer to alcohol that is consumed with the aim of lessening the effects of a hangover. The expression originally referred to a method of treatment of a rabid dog bite by placing hair from the dog in the bite wound.[][/QUOTE]

 

[cakemaker]

How did you put hair on the smoking smiley?

Rogaine.

 

[anonynon]

Re: Hoaxie should kept ESMB up and running

I wish there was a way for us all to magically heal the pain that has been handed to Emma.

If I were an OT (if there were any)
and if I was at cause over MEST (if that meant anything)

that's what I'd do.

Otherwise if we can harness the outflows of the Clearwater SP building, maybe we can use that to make everything go right again. Forever.

All that SP power ought to be good for something.

 

[Terril park]

Emma.....I saw in the chat that you are working 12 hours a day. That along with your recent loss of your mother and having a family to take care of and whatever else you have to do in life......I don't know how you manage to take care of ESMB along with all of the rest of what you have to do in life. You must be Super Woman. That all looks like too much of an overload to me. In the face of all this, I don't blame you for wanting to quit, even if the idiots weren't taking pot shots at you.

I hope you can find someone to take it over who has more free time and isn't so pressed with other things. But, if not, please just keep the website up for others to come and research and read, without the posting and chat......at least that way you wouldn't have to monitor it all the time and people could still come here and read what's already been posted. This is too valuable a website to just end, or close down totally, in October.

Of course Emma is a superwoman. This thread acknowledges that in spades.

I think her hubby Tansey is at the very least a potential superman. Had
one skype conversation. I was very impressed. Also by his posts. And his humour

I hope this forum can be continued somehow. It clearly has been a gift from a Goddess. It is also clear that ending it will cause misery for many and cut the comm lines of many. [excuse scientologese]

So Ems, I'll not put it into scn terms, but clearly this forum is needed and wanted in extremis!

love

 

[smartone]

Emma,

Thank you so much for what you have done for us.

You've made many people happy.

I completely understand your reasons for leaving ESMB.

Best of luck for the future.

 

[The_Fixer]

Jeez. All I can say at this moment is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9h2_P8bFUyA

Thanks for your efforts Emma.

 

[Terril park]

No one dispuits that music played on original instruments can be lovely and inspiring. It is a jooy to hear.

But that in no way negates the thrill of hearing Bach being adapted by Busoni for the piano.

Well Ems you possibly can't appreciate the synergy you have created.
Even I didn't fully until 5 minutes ago. I've fulfilled a decades loss of some Bach. Yes am a computer dummy but you were the catylyst. Posted also to the Apollo thread.

Hope you can appreciate his glory


"With you Bro!

I see you also have evil transcriptionists and editors.

I expect the spell check process handles that. Sadly I'm at a lower level.

But then, ...... I think this bach Busoni transcription is Bach's greatest testament.

Currently, and under the influence of the georgeous Helene I even find it greater than the "Art of Fugue".

This is really HARD. For hundreds of years it was considered merely an intellectual effort. An exersise not really music to be listened to.

Ho!

Just searched U-tube and have found my favorite version where Lional Rogg completes the final 4 part fugue!

Years ago asked the record company if they would release it on CD and they said there were problems including London underground trains being too noisy.

Gird your loins. You need to enjoy!"

And Emma but not for you I would never have found this earlier dream
of mine.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEMNU1Wv42w

 

[dchoiceisalwaysrs]

I know I've said it before and I probably won't be taken seriously, but I'm done with this.

I'm done with ESMB

I'm done with having Scientology play any part in my life.

I'm done with everything to do with this game.

ESMB is paid for until October 2012 at which time it will cease to exist. If you are an historian please take what you want from the archives before October. I'm prepared to give a copy of the database to a handful of people who can do what they want with it. Those people are Mick Wenlock, Paul Adams, Ray Hill & Ethercat. Those people might be able to salvage something.

I suggest registering at "Reach for The Tipping Point" message board if you want a new board. It is very well run & I have the highest regards for Ethercat. Also I think OCMB is accepting new registrations currently. Glibby, Sponge & RIF do a great job over there and it deserves support too.

I'm sorry if this announcement upsets anyone, but I simply can't do this anymore. I started out trying to do something good and it's ended up that I have made enemies everywhere. I don't want to read anymore crap about how I'm a sellout, a liar, an OSA operative, a bitch etc. I'm over it. I need to live my own life now, free of Scientology & the effects it has on people while in and also after they leave.

I only have one piece of advice left for anyone considering leaving Scientology. Read about Hubbard & find out who he really was. Read stories from OT8s who made it to the top of the Bridge & found out there was nothing there. Educate yourself as much as you can and as quickly as you can and once you've come to an understanding of what happened to you - RUN LIKE FUCK. Get away from ANYTHING & EVERYTHING to do with Scientology including groups formed by exes.

Go back to school. Travel. Play soccer. Join Rotary. Meditate. Raise kids. Volunteer for the Red Cross. Do ANYTHING except hang around. Scientology took too much of your life already. Don't give it one more second than necessary to recover.

Over & out.

My bolding above.

Can't say that I know you so well Michelle, but you and your ESMB have kept me great company over the last almost 4 years.

Over the last few weeks, I have been coming to the same idea as I have bolded in your Post. And this also:

"Educate yourself as much as you can and as quickly as you can and once you've come to an understanding of what happened to you ...."

I came to ESMB as I was doing exactly as you describe, ..finding out WTF? how could it have happened?!

I found it.

You started and maintained a very very rich board, with so many different people holding so many views, discussing and even thrashing it all out from practically every perspective. Thank you and all here, for sharing and shining the light.

I am working on creating a better balance in my life too.

ESMB just keeps giving. May it somehow remain for many many others to see the whole picture.

Then better choices can be made.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

May your new balance bring you and yours great joy.

 

[Emma]

As I understand it, trainspotting is a closed group that is not accessible from an ordinary Internet search. A person with questions about Scientology would not stumble over it in a million years. Its claim to fame, at this point, apparently, judging by a comment - from someone I never heard of before - in Chat, and by a comment on a thread on a.r.s., is that it has destroyed ESMB.

The drama and intrigue of all this does not interest me, and I don't think it interests most participants or lurkers on ESMB.

It does appear that Emma was taunted by this Trainspotting group, and I don't think it's as benign as you're making it sound.

That said, I don't like the idea that Emma is making a decision, under stress, in the wake of a deep personal loss, after having been taunted by a closed group inaccessible to most people.

I'm not saying that OSA is behind this, but it has similar toxic stink.

Emma, after some time passes, you can always change your mind. Let some time pass.

Why give a few stinkers a "win" ?

You are correct that the group is not as benign as Infinite has made out. I've only gone back a couple of months reading the posts there, but I saw enough. Apparently it was much worse when it was first formed over a year ago. I heard from a number of people who left the group in disgust very early on, that some of the things written about me, Feral, Panda etc were just vile.

The thing is though, it didn't worry me too much. I heard stuff every now & then about what was being written but I never really gave it too much thought.

Then about a week after I lost my mother, a new Facebook group sprung up called "Ex Scientology message bored". I'm pretty sure the timing was no coincidence. Again it was initiated by Zinj and again was a closed group (as in you have to apply for membership or be nominated) but this time the posts were public. This group was a much "milder" group than trainspotting but the same "theme" (bash ESMB, bash Emma etc). I had to wonder why, when this group of people who already had a closed group and could "natter their brains out" already, needed a second group and one that anyone could read but not respond to.

Anyway, after reading the shit on Trainspotting & the other group I realised that these people will never stop. It's been over a year since Zinj et al were banned and still they are at it. For some reason they think it's perfectly fine to sit back in their comfy little group and take pot shots, twist everything I do and say to fit their crazed conspiracy theory that I sold out to Marty blah blah blah. Perhaps they don't realise how insulting that is to me, or perhaps they do, I don't know. But either way they don't care.

I really really don't need this shit in my life & the only way to get rid of it is to say "ok you win, I'm outta here". Which is actually fine because I've wanted to move on for ages anyway, and this has just given me the extra motivation.

I hope someone will take it on. I don't want to lose the history either. It's valuable for that reason alone. But the person who does take it on had better be warned that you are fair game and every single decision you make will be thrown back in your face, turned into a conspiracy & you'll be taunted by this group. Maybe not straight away, but eventually they'll come for you too.

 

[Emma]

I just want to say that that just about every post in this thread has made me cry. I'm really glad that ESMB was helpful to so many.

Thank you for your love & support over the years.

I'll be around until one of two things happen:

1. Someone takes it over
2. The hosting expires

But I won't be posting much.

I need time for me right now (to adjust to life without my mum) and I've also just gotten a big promotion at work & need to concentrate on my career.

I will keep you updated on any developments regarding the future of the board though.

Thanks again everyone for your kindness.

 

[NoName]

I'm thankful for ESMB and its helpful residents who helped me out with detoxing from the Indies spin on LRH. I would love ESMB to be around for my in friend when he is ready.

Won't do paypal or anything no anonymous but will send cash to a physical address to Emma or anyone who wants to take it over.

 

[Terril park]

"For some reason they think it's perfectly fine to sit back in their comfy little group and take pot shots, twist everything I do and say to fit their crazed conspiracy theory that I sold out to Marty blah blah blah."

This is complete nonsense!

I could well be cited as "Sold Out To Marty". Met the guy and liked him and has been some what supportive of him on this forum and elsewhere.

Marty has posted lots of snide comments to me especially when I call him out on saying the FZ are Squirrels and denigrating David Mayo. But I still support his efforts. And he's blocked me many times from posting. And
I'm pro tech.

You sold out to Marty!! What delusional stupidity!

Tell those assholes to bring it on with me!

Anyway, posting this just gives me another excuse to hear the last
part of Bach's " The Art of Fugue"

Another reason to thank the Goddess.

 

[FoTi]

You are correct that the group is not as benign as Infinite has made out. I've only gone back a couple of months reading the posts there, but I saw enough. Apparently it was much worse when it was first formed over a year ago. I heard from a number of people who left the group in disgust very early on, that some of the things written about me, Feral, Panda etc were just vile.

The thing is though that it didn't worry me too much. I heard stuff every now & then about what was being written but I never really gave it too much thought.

Then about a week after I lost my mother, a new Facebook group sprung up called "Ex Scientology message bored". I'm pretty sure the timing was no coincidence. Again it was initiated by Zinj and again was a closed group (as in you have to apply for membership or be nominated) but this time the posts were public. This group was a much "milder" group than trainspotting but the same "theme" (bash ESMB, bash Emma etc). I had to wonder why, when this group of people who already had a closed group and could "natter their brains out" already, needed a second group and one that anyone could read but not respond to.

Anyway, after reading the shit on Trainspotting & the other group I realised that these people will never stop. It's been over a year since Zinj et al were banned and still they are at it. For some reason they think it's perfectly fine to sit back in their comfy little group and take pot shots, twist everything I do and say to fit their crazed conspiracy theory that I sold out to Marty blah blah blah. Perhaps they don't realise how insulting that is to me, or perhaps they do, I don't know. But either way they don't care.

I really really don't need this shit in my life & the only way to get rid of it is to say "ok you win, I'm outta here". Which is actually fine because I've wanted to move on for ages anyway, and this has just given me the extra motivation.

I hope someone will take it on. I don't want to lose the history either. It's valuable for that reason alone. But the person who does take it on had better be warned that you are fair game and every single decision you make will be thrown back in your face, turned into a conspiracy & you'll be taunted by this group. Maybe not straight away, but eventually they'll come for you too.

People got banned for playing dirty, so they just went elsewhere to play dirty. People who play dirty like to play dirty.....that's what they do. If that's their game, they are not going to change for you or anybody else. Crazy people is what they is. You can't change them. You can only avoid them and refuse to play with them. Recognize your rightness and ignore their trying to make you wrong or smear you or make nothing of you. The village idiot is recognized by others as the village idiot. The village idiots will stick together, but who cares?

It's a shock when one finds out that people they thought were their friends turn out to be their enemies, behind their back. Slime is ugly. Betrayal can be devistating.

Unfortunately some people are just nuts.....and it might take a while to see how nuts they really are. They're kind of like werewolves.....they only show themselves under certain conditions, and when they do, they have very ugly teeth. When they show up in your garden, they can be a bit dicey to get rid of and even when you do, they might still try to find a way to have you for dinner. It's advisable not to go into their territory or else you might get clawed and bit.

Time for a peaceful, loving life now, Emma.....filled with lots of fun for you and your family. If anyone deserves it, you do.

 

[Free Being Me]

Hi Emma, I'm very sorry to hear about your Mother. My heartfelt condolences to you. She raised a rare person .... you.

As to the Ex's that have banded together for their shitz n giggles on F.B. to live in a land of meaningless spiteful tinfoil, shame on all of you. All of you have become the very abhorrence we strove to break away from in the first place. That makes each of you the lowest of the low.

 

[oneonewasaracecar]

You are correct that the group is not as benign as Infinite has made out. I've only gone back a couple of months reading the posts there, but I saw enough. Apparently it was much worse when it was first formed over a year ago. I heard from a number of people who left the group in disgust very early on, that some of the things written about me, Feral, Panda etc were just vile.

The thing is though, it didn't worry me too much. I heard stuff every now & then about what was being written but I never really gave it too much thought.

Then about a week after I lost my mother, a new Facebook group sprung up called "Ex Scientology message bored". I'm pretty sure the timing was no coincidence. Again it was initiated by Zinj and again was a closed group (as in you have to apply for membership or be nominated) but this time the posts were public. This group was a much "milder" group than trainspotting but the same "theme" (bash ESMB, bash Emma etc). I had to wonder why, when this group of people who already had a closed group and could "natter their brains out" already, needed a second group and one that anyone could read but not respond to.

Anyway, after reading the shit on Trainspotting & the other group I realised that these people will never stop. It's been over a year since Zinj et al were banned and still they are at it. For some reason they think it's perfectly fine to sit back in their comfy little group and take pot shots, twist everything I do and say to fit their crazed conspiracy theory that I sold out to Marty blah blah blah. Perhaps they don't realise how insulting that is to me, or perhaps they do, I don't know. But either way they don't care.

I really really don't need this shit in my life & the only way to get rid of it is to say "ok you win, I'm outta here". Which is actually fine because I've wanted to move on for ages anyway, and this has just given me the extra motivation.

I hope someone will take it on. I don't want to lose the history either. It's valuable for that reason alone. But the person who does take it on had better be warned that you are fair game and every single decision you make will be thrown back in your face, turned into a conspiracy & you'll be taunted by this group. Maybe not straight away, but eventually they'll come for you too.

After reading this, I understand that Scientology 'tech' and particularly, the upper levels truly shut down people's humanity.

A normal person would not be able to attack someone while they are vulnerable and grieving. Their human emotions would stop them doing this.

There are a number of people, still tolerated on this board, who behaviour is such that they capable of ignoring a majority opinion that they are wrong on issues regarding Scientology. I cannot imagine how fucked up the people are, who are so intolerable as to need to be banned.

It seems that the people you have banned are among those that will never recover, in part, because they don't think anything is wrong with them.

I cannot imagine what it must be like to tolerate the harassment of truly deluded people who have allowed themselves, perhaps unwittingly, to become evil monsters. My sympathies to your for your varying and ongoing losses.

As to the twisted little group - you are deranged, delusional people who have lost your humanity. You are Ronbots. You have the hand of long dead psychopath up your arse making you attack people. You shall not breathe fresh air this side of the grave.

 

[Dilettante]

I just want to say that that just about every post in this thread has made me cry. I'm really glad that ESMB was helpful to so many.

Thank you for your love & support over the years.

I'll be around until one of two things happen:

1. Someone takes it over
2. The hosting expires

But I won't be posting much.

I need time for me right now (to adjust to life without my mum) and I've also just gotten a big promotion at work & need to concentrate on my career.

I will keep you updated on any developments regarding the future of the board though.

Thanks again everyone for your kindness.

I think it was Goodtwin that said she needed to clean out her junk drawer I always thought that was a good way of putting it. God bless, take your time and enjoy different noise.


Dil