Nothing can replace a good humor
Finally, a little bit about myself.
And I am sorry it took me a bit long. Thank you for your patience!
I am going to be somewhat brief at this time, please forgive me for that too.
I have my reasons.
I joined Scn in early 90's, after reading Dn book and deciding to see if the technology described there work and the states can be achieved, sounded
so good, you know.
I attended Dianetics Workshop, few other Life Improvement courses and even though nothing amazing happened, all the information was making sense and was sure giving hope and positive vibe in general.
So I decided to continue on that path and hopefully to go Clear by the end of that year. I got trained as Dianetics Auditor and was co-auditing with my buddy. Shortly, I accepted an offer to join mission staff, got trained as a Supervisor and was working in a course room for the most part.
I also had a brief contact with a Freezone and decided that things were too loosely interpreted/applied, mixed with other schools of though/practices and decided it was not for me.
Few years later, I joined an Org and got trained as a Class V Golden Age Of Tech Auditor. I delivered many Rundowns, Grades and New Era Dianetics to many.
I also got some auditing myself and most of it was rather a positive experience. I am not Clear though (17 or so years later, I know).
(Most ethics interviews and some of the admin shenanigans is a whole different story that most of you all already know or heard about anyway and is just a plain BS.)
I am getting closer and closer to the subject that actually concerns me.
To make long story short - on many occasions when I was audited, I felt emotionally better after wards. So as my pcs after I audited them, but some of them also would get rid of some physical pains, like tooth ache, etc., as a result, which made me happy every time, needless to say.
All that first-hand experience, plus observing some other cases (like some girl getting rid of really bad psoriasis and a friend of mine fully recovering from 3 strokes, etc.) is the main reason I stuck around for that long, even though I am not on staff anymore. My main motivation was always to help others around anyway I can and to be happy myself. That's probably what kept me on staff for so long, despite of sometimes enormous amount of horseshit.
Now, throughout my career I observed some "Clears" and "OT's", both public and staff that had some serious physical and emotional issues that even from my not-Clear perspective/position were some heavy out-points that go against LRH's descriptions of the states mentioned above.
Like illnesses (from cold to cancer and anything in between), yelling in people's faces, humiliating others in public, etc.
I also know some very cool people who reached Clear and OT. I have very warm feelings toward them, some very good people.
However, all these discrepancies, if it's the right word made me question things I have been part of for almost half of my life and that includes Ron.
Are the case gains I produced on myself and others are just a placebo effect (which is still not a bad thing, considering some results/outcome) and the whole thing is a really clever hoax where common sense and some workable tools/ideas were mixed with an amazing sci-fi stuff presented as a next step to achieve in order to trick others into the most brilliantly orchestrated scam in history?
Or is it just some massive out-tech originated by DM or god knows whos, that prevents everyone from getting consistently great results, in terms of spiritual freedom/advancement, super abilities, great health and all that good stuff?
So I am looking at all these factors, still trying to make my mind.
I have seen and heard it all, from extremely negative to extremely positive.
And then there is also me and my own experiences.
I hope I make sense, let me know if you want me to clarify any of the above please.
I will respect any honest opinion/comment, even if critical, but I am especially interested to hear from "tech people" or I guess "Ex-tech people".
Thank you again to every single one of you for giving me a warm welcome here, I really feel the sincerity of it, like you guys knew it's not an easy thing for me to join you here and start talking, which it is not.
I work a lot, but I will try to be here at least once a day for now and will be glad to try to answer every question from everyone and participate otherwise, as I feel like.
With all respect, Stat.