What's new

Just worked up the courage

Opter

Silver Meritorious Patron
Stickbyme


:welcome:


and,we love to read personal stories here.:yes::yes::yes:( You can see that I have an SP trait:omg:I use generalities-we-in my sentence:duh::eyeroll::melodramatic:).


Opter
 

Outethicsofficer

Silver Meritorious Patron
Welcome. If you wish to stay unidentified, you might want to go very light on the details. You have 30 minutes after you post to edit it. :)

I don't know if they do this, but it wouldn't be too hard to make up a computer database of global ex-staff and put in data from life histories (you did at least one, right?), and then it would take less than a second to see if posts like yours give any matches.

Paul

Paul's probably right but don't sweat it. Lurk and post when you want, while stories are read avidly here by us Exs, you don't have to say much if anything about yourself. Believe it or not simply posting here amounts to you have just taken a massive step toward breaking the grip of the cult over you. It drops away little by little. Welcome!
 

The_Fixer

Class Clown
My parents got into Scientology when I was a teenager and I kept going with it long after they got swindled out of a great deal of money. Go to Flag, buy lots and lots of intensives, get labeled an illegal PC and sent home without your money. My mother petitioned to have the status overturned but with no avail.

Hi Stick and welcome. Nice to have you on board.

That little paragraph you wrote has me wondering if your folks would like to get a refund. After all, they were happy to take the money and give nothing for it.

The church (coff! coff!) had no right to keep it. Your folks have the right to have it back.

Just food for thought.....
 

Kookaburra

Gold Meritorious Patron
Welcome to ESMB, StickbyMe.

I understand the fear. It is implanted in the Scientologist with years of ethics training and witnessing "heads on a pike" and "fair game". However, it is mostly spooky shadows. Threat of disconnection keeps a lot of wannabe exes more or less in line and quiet. But once you break out and see the cult and its leader for what they really are, that fear evaporates. Disconnections may happen, but the cult does not have that much longer to wreak havoc on its members and soon they will all be out here with us.

There is heaps of stuff you should read. The unraveling process can take quite awhile, but it is most enlightening. Enjoy.
 

afaceinthecrowd

Gold Meritorious Patron
Welcome SticknyMe. :yes: So glad you are here with all of Us. :clap:

When When I first posted on ESMB I had been Lurking here for 6 months or so and registered for 2 or 3 weeks. I finally decided to just "Let 'er Buck". :happydance:

That was two years ago and I'm still standin'. Take your time and settle in. Tell a story or two when you're ready and, until then, chime in when and where you wish with your "Take". :thumbsup:


Face :)
 

LA SCN

NOT drinking the kool-aid
Hi, I just registered. After going to the Delphian School, I was on staff at a Class V org for 1.5 years before moving up to the SO. I also did some work on a major campaign, but I'm hesitant to list it in this post in case OSA is reading as this would identify me pretty clearly, and I'm not looking for a declare (I still have SCN friends and connections and don't want the disconnection).

My parents got into Scientology when I was a teenager and I kept going with it long after they got swindled out of a great deal of money. Go to Flag, buy lots and lots of intensives, get labeled an illegal PC and sent home without your money. My mother petitioned to have the status overturned but with no avail.

In the 4 years I was a staff member (including SO time), I never got trained or audited. I did my purif as a teenager and this is where I stayed the entire time. All my training was post-related. Now my family doesn't really talk about our time in Scientology, as if it never happened. My girlfriend doesn't know about our involvement and I'd like to keep it that way. My only real connection is when I get barraged with phone calls before major events, but I've managed to minimize this lately.

I have avoided sites like this for a long time because there's a part of me that is still afraid of being declared, although lord knows why as I haven't been in an org since the launch of the NY org several years ago.

I'd love to reconnect with some of my old CLO EUS cohorts (think early-mid 2000s). Although I've essentially edited out this portion of my life, I still have some very fond memories of being on purpose and active. It's really hard for me to reconcile the nostalgia of those times with my current disdain for what the Church has become.

Anyway, I'm here now. Nervous even as I write this that I'm going to get a phone call from the local DSA.

Thanks for joining us and thanks for your facts about another Cof$ 'Success Story' of pseudo-slavery and broken dreams.

May you enjoy and be enlightened by your experience here.
 

uniquemand

Unbeliever
Hi, I just registered. After going to the Delphian School, I was on staff at a Class V org for 1.5 years before moving up to the SO. I also did some work on a major campaign, but I'm hesitant to list it in this post in case OSA is reading as this would identify me pretty clearly, and I'm not looking for a declare (I still have SCN friends and connections and don't want the disconnection).

My parents got into Scientology when I was a teenager and I kept going with it long after they got swindled out of a great deal of money. Go to Flag, buy lots and lots of intensives, get labeled an illegal PC and sent home without your money. My mother petitioned to have the status overturned but with no avail.

In the 4 years I was a staff member (including SO time), I never got trained or audited. I did my purif as a teenager and this is where I stayed the entire time. All my training was post-related. Now my family doesn't really talk about our time in Scientology, as if it never happened. My girlfriend doesn't know about our involvement and I'd like to keep it that way. My only real connection is when I get barraged with phone calls before major events, but I've managed to minimize this lately.

I have avoided sites like this for a long time because there's a part of me that is still afraid of being declared, although lord knows why as I haven't been in an org since the launch of the NY org several years ago.

I'd love to reconnect with some of my old CLO EUS cohorts (think early-mid 2000s). Although I've essentially edited out this portion of my life, I still have some very fond memories of being on purpose and active. It's really hard for me to reconcile the nostalgia of those times with my current disdain for what the Church has become.

Anyway, I'm here now. Nervous even as I write this that I'm going to get a phone call from the local DSA.

You're in the right place, at the right time. You are among people who have (many of us) been on staff and experienced very similar departures and subsequent wierdnesses in our families and friends for years. I got over a lot of it quickly, but the family thing can't be resolved completely, sometimes, until you can re-establish communication (I WAS declared). At any rate, take your time, test the waters, read and listen. We are happy to hear your story, but all of us can understand your initial caution.

Don't worry. The Church has been significantly weakened over the years, such that they only have time and money to go after people who really threaten their income stream. If you want to avoid their attention, you won't have to try hard. Personal stories they might catalog, who knows, but coming after you is beyond their means unless you are a screaming problem in the media right now.
 

Happy Days

Silver Meritorious Patron
A very big :welcome2: to you StickByMe.

Hang around and read some; there are really great people on this board.

And the power of CoS is much less than what you think. All you are doing now is taking back the power and control they stole from you. Enjoy :cheerleader:
 
Welcome ! Anyone who comes to sites like this is in danger of being ' recognised ' but sometimes we have to stand together. Yes they can declare us and yes they can cause problems but for me the freedom from them is worth that hassle . I have recently had some bad experiences and wonder if it will ever end but better to be out than in ! Enjoy and keep talking to people here who understand where you are at the moment .
 

GreyWolf

Gold Meritorious Patron
Welcome! I hope you will be happy here.

The best thing is that you are out. You don't have to do anything here. There is no "hurry up and get to your next service" here. Relax and take your time. Someone will be here for you if you have any questions, or need to talk.
 

Tiger Lily

Gold Meritorious Patron
:welcome: So glad you're here StickbyMe! I remember that same fear of getting declared. At first there was still a part of me that thought Scientology was onto something, and that being declared keep me from going free. It's so deeply laid into you when you are in.

From reading and posting here it started to become clear that Scientology didn't have any exclusive magic key to eternity (and later I realized that it had no key at all to eternity). It comes off in layers.

One of the things that helped me most was dissecting KSW series 1 -- that thing is so loaded with false ideas and brainwashing techniques. I wish I could remember the thread, but that was years ago.

Have fun here! There are so many truly great people here who completely understand what you went through, and what you are going through now.
 

AnonSunshine

Patron with Honors
Sitckybyme: :welcome: :welcome: :welcome: :welcome:

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
I am so happy that you are out of that destructive, malign, money grab cult. I know how do you feel, because I had felt the same when I left. :handinhand: :handinhand: :handinhand: :handinhand:

The wonderful news are that you are not going to be exploited of your last cent, you can move forward in life, the wogs are great, you do not belong to a crazy-false elite, and life still wonderful after the implanting of so many weird and false ideas of $cientology.
Take your time, read a lot the internet as xenu.com, lermanet.com, martyrathbun wordpress site that have a lot of former executives and public telling the truth about all the dirty and degraded tricks played on them by the Cult and what had happened with them.
After you read all those websites, you will decompress. :heartflower: :heartflower:

I read several sites, every night after work, for about 6 months any story of people out of that cult, and it release the bonds that I had.
I felt so stupid to have believed in all that crap. Now, relax :happydance:
:dancer: :dancer: :dancer: :party: :party:
I am sure within months you will start to feel better and will improve in every thing in life. Do not say much about yourself, so OSA will not identify you, or try to recover you or do dirty old tricks with you or your family. They are the dirtiest bastards, destroyers of people's life under the command of a lunatic.
All the best to you, my friend. You are here among friends, but at the moment do not volunteer data that could identify you. :handinhand: :handinhand: :handinhand: :handinhand:

Love and hugs,
 

ILived1984!

Patron with Honors
Hi Stick,

Welcome to the board! I found this place shortly after I left the S.O. and it helped put a lot of experiences and emotions into perspective. I don't come here often, but I visit from time to time. There doesn't seem to be a lot of recent (last five years) Ex-SO on here, which are the people I can identify with.

At any rate, I was at the CLO EUS until mid 2002. Drop a message if we crossed paths, want to laugh about the place or anything really.
 
Top