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Lost my love

Discussion in 'Fair Game and Disconnection Victims' started by maxbenn, Aug 27, 2014.

  1. prosecco

    prosecco Patron Meritorious

    It was a very long time ago. Am not sure you can fully trust someone who puts a cult before love, and this is what you need to realize: they will ALWAYS put the cult before you. Some do leave, but the odds are stacked against this if her family are also in the cult.
  2. apple

    apple Patron Meritorious

    People on the internet are making fun of the Xenu story. Well, for me there is no proof of his existance or non-existance. Let's say that he existed...
    According to Hubbard... Einstein was right about the fact, that man can't go faster then light. But Xenu was travelling for only 9 weeks from the Polaris Solar-system which is over 430 LJ away? He must have gone with more than 2000 times more than the speed of light! That doesen't make sense to me! Or am I confusing something and getting it wrong?
    Alpha Centauri, which is the nearest solar system to us is 4-5 LJ away... ?!?!?! WTF?

    Please tell me that I'm wrong with that!


    Yes and according to Hubbard Xenu made the journey on a modified DC 8.
  3. Purple Rain

    Purple Rain Crusader

    People in cults really do love bomb you. That's why they send out the pretty girls to do body routing. How many men here became involved with Scientology largely because of the beautiful women? People of different religious persuasions can and do form happy couples and families, although it is still likely to be one of the biggest bones of contention throughout the relationship, along with money. Even in a cult, you can form a relationship with someone if you can live with the fact that they will dump you as soon as it's ordered. If you can live with not being honest about your true feelings, or your true self. And maybe there are even some people out there who are worth that.

    Also, the pool of potential mates is smaller in cults or some church groups, so people will sometimes think the only way is to find a partner outside the group and try and bring the other one into it.

    As far as being cruel, though, you have not even scratched the surface of it with Scientology.
  4. strativarius

    strativarius Inveterate gnashnab & snoutband

    The 'Children of God' cult in the late 60's specialised in doing this:

    Flirty Fishing Flashes and Fizzles

    In 1974, Berg introduced a controversial conversion method called “Flirty Fishing” or “FFing.” Writer Stephen A. Kent observed that Berg advocated, “COG members practice recruitment and resource acquisition through sexual activities.” Berg urged females to become “hookers for Jesus.”

    Last edited: Aug 29, 2014
  5. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    I know... I have listened to the Lecture... :p
    While listeing to him I've photoshopped this. The Background is downloaded from the internet... just made the plane in it! :)
    AS he claims, they were identical to the ones we know, but without the engines.
    I wanted to make a small logo on the back of it with "Xenu Airways" or smth like that, but it just looked stupid. :/
    Why does NASA not use those if they were already tested and perfect for such journeys? ;p
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2014
  6. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    Somehow I do believe you, but still... I cannot imagine, she would do that! :(
  7. Purple Rain

    Purple Rain Crusader

    Well, maybe she did really love you, but just couldn't be with you. Hopefully you will find your true love one day.
  8. GreyLensman

    GreyLensman Silver Meritorious Patron

    Unfortunately there is no real neutral. Eventually you would have had to participate in Scientology, she would have been brought into ethics and told to stop letting you be yourself (it would not be put that way) and bring you into the fold. And either you would go in and start the delusionary practice of Scientology and become gungho or she would realize this was bullshit and leave (rarely happens like that - usually it happens way way further down the timeline...), or you would break up.

    Your relationship with her would always be subject to the whim of the Church of Scn. Seriously. Even once you were committed (hah hah) as a Scientologist, you are still subject to the arbitrary fortunes of "justice"

    I'm sorry to hear about your pain. But there really isn't a positive in lying to yourself.
  9. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    I want to tell her, that I'll be there for her, even in several years if she decides to join the "WOG" side... They should call us WOC with a C... like: "We own cookies"! :)
    I cannot tell her, that there is going to be a new start for US, but I will not let her down! I have made a plan already if she makes the right choice. So I don't have to think what we are gonna do next but just stick to the plan and get her the hell out of there and make her life as peacefull as possible for the time they will chase her or do whatever. I don't exaclty know what they, the "OSA", is doing and looking for. I know the YouTube stories and so on, but that is not enough info to act against it.
    It really doesen't matter when she is going to contact me... 2 weeks, 20 Years... at anytime and I am willing to help. How should I tell her this? Make her feel, that I mean it and not just say it to win her back right now!
    I already have a secret location for her to stay... even a plan how to get her there without beeing followed.
    If needed financial recources... not in cash off course... as I've learnd that they can use "love bombing", they can also play the "victim" to get the money.
    Friends who will look out for her and "protect" her 24/7 so she wont miss the People from the Org... for now... I dont know if they are gonna be there in the future though. :(

    So how should I tell her? By e-mail? Phone call? Letter? Personally? any other way of communication? What should i say/wirte? When should i tell her?

  10. Purple Rain

    Purple Rain Crusader

    If you can tell her personally that is better than a phone call or email, because that is evidence that you have been antagonistic and she would need to handle it in the standard manner. In person there is a slight chance that her heart will be softened by your presence. Other people have had success with giving their partners a disposable cellphone - or using one themselves. So that is a possibility - in case she ever feels she needs to call you.

    It sounds as if she is not a Sea Org member held against her will or a staff member living in poverty - she is a well-looked after member of a loving family who does not see the bad side of Scientology. I frankly don't think she will see a need to escape unless she joins the Sea Org or staff at some time in the future. I don't really like your chances.

    I understand that you feel the need to wait for her right now, but what if you do meet someone and fall in love ten years from now? Are you really not going to marry her because of some old promise to someone who will probably be married herself - to a Scientologist - with kids of her own? What if you do marry and have a family and she turns up twenty years later like you promised her she could? It sounds like a pie crust promise to me - easily made and easily broken. Much better to promise to always HELP her if she needs it, I think. Otherwise, you should seriously consider just joining a monastery. That promise has the same effect as taking a vow. And if that's not the case, it's not fair to any other woman you might take up with. That's just my two cents, for what it's worth.
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2014
  11. Terril park

    Terril park Sponsor

    In person would be best IMO.

    There is another angle which may be usefull. Let her know she can do Scn
    in the Freezone or Independent arena. There she would have little or no pressure to
    disconnect from anyone. For example my wife is a very devout catholic and
    several times a week goes to prayer meetings and vigils and I have no problem
    with that at all. I'm a freezone scientologist.

    In the COS eyes a Freezoner is worse than an SP. However the COS
    continually treats its people badly and people appear to be leaving in droves.
    Maybe that might happen to her one day, and if she still wishes to
    follow Scn she can and follow you as well.
  12. I told you I was trouble

    I told you I was trouble Suspended animation

    Why do you do this Terril??? You are just adding more complication to this for maxbenn.

    Her whole family are cofs and you know that they would disconnect from her in a heartbeat if she were (silly enough) to join your Freezone.

    Maxbenn ... I think you did really well by not allowing yourself to get sucked into the cult by this girl ... I hope you find someone who deserves you now and forget about her, she's not emotionally available for a relationship and she never was, it's sad but she probably was "recruiting" you (they're all trained to do that).

    It's hard, but please be happy that you avoided being trapped, don't communicate to her at all ... move on and don't look back.

  13. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    That was, what i meant. I don't know if I'm going to be married in 10 or 20 years... All I want to say, that I will help her out! Not that I'll come back to her when she showes up at my door or calls me. I am not going to break up with my partner just to get back to her... It is a promise, that I will just help her getting out!

    And yes... she is not a Sea Org member. And yes, I think so as well, that she does not listen and see what is going on out there. Like I've said before... no TV and just selceted news sites on the net or papers.
  14. prosecco

    prosecco Patron Meritorious

    I'd keep it as neutral as possible and say something like, 'I will always be happy to help you, whatever the circumstances with no questions asked...'
  15. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    She is kind of a free SCN. But as more as I read about SCN I see common behaviours in hers and the ppl who are speaking out loud.
    During our relationship I have never told her to leave the CoS. Never!
    In my opinion she is not that free as she thinks she is. Like I've said... Her parents are OT VIII. Her father owns 50% the building of the curch... It's not like they are just some scientologists from around the corner.
    I've asked her once: "What would happen if you would say, that you are not going to do any courses?" - "Nothing!" I belived in it first of all. But after seeing what was going on between us and the lack of consistency in her sentences during a conversation. She was giving me the feeling that she couldn't speak for herself and that the stuff she was saying was not that, what she was thinking.
  16. I told you I was trouble

    I told you I was trouble Suspended animation

    maxbenn ... your ex is cofs (Church of Scientology) and the "Freezone" is the absolute enemy of the cofs, they are completely different, the Freezone is like a breakaway group.

    Terril is a scientologist (Freezone) and he tries to recruit people here.

  17. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    Ok... let me get things straight...
    It is not the fact, that she was my gf and we broke up because of this... I just saw the similarity to what happened to me and what ppl are saying on the internet. My example is not that extreme, but similarities are there.
    The thing is, that when I imagine, that a human beeing is sucked in so deep that he/she will act for a "life style" based on nothing but sci-fi stories and policys which are out ethics. She is raised by scientologists... She is not acting for herself but what she was "told" to do... even when she thinks, that it is her decision. That is what pisses me off! THat this fucking cult is destroying not my life... that I broke up with my gf, but that ppl are getting disconnected.
    Before all of this happened I was like: "Wow... Ok, sounds bad, but life is brutal and you need to go on."
    I've talked to an ex-scientologist from Hamburg. She needed to disconnect from her mom, cause she stopped lending her money. Maybe I would belive her, but definitely I would not be able to understand her! That's what I know. Thanks to this experience I've had things have changed. I try to get those people and understand them.

    So this is what I believe so far... Yes she is a "free SCN", but just because she got told what is the best for her by SCN's. And therefore she doesen't know the other side. Or she cannot accept it like I did not accept that, cause I was with her and couldn't imagine that it will happen to me!
  18. maxbenn

    maxbenn Patron

    Ohhh... I should study the words I don't understand! ;P Thanks for education!
  19. I told you I was trouble

    I told you I was trouble Suspended animation

    Thinking about this will drive you crazy, if you let it ... because it will never make sense.

    Her parents would have put the 'hard word' on her (told her to dump you) after you said that Dianetics was absolute rubbish (on the car trip) ... you never had a chance.

    Really ... get back out there and have fun and be proud of yourself for refusing to be manipulated.

  20. Enthetan

    Enthetan Master of Disaster

    Believe it. You have NO idea how powerful a hold Scientology has on a long-term committed member, which she evidently was.

    You dodged a bullet. Be thankful for that.