virginia99
New Member
I was only with Scientology for about 6 months, so my story won't be as fantastic as many of them here, but I really want to talk about it.
In 1988 at the age of 23, I was to be married, but my fiance lived in another state. I had started nursing school and he just quit calling me, and I could not reach him. He had simply disappeared. I became extremely depressed and quit school. I learned later that this was my "ruin."
I had read Battlefield Earth and I thought, "Wouldn't it be fun to work in an organization like that-so bureaucratic and comical!" Later (1989), I picked up a Dianetics book and found what I believed to be the answer to my woes-a way to be mentally healthy. My brother and I took a trip to Seattle to take the introductory course at $200+, can't recall the name of the course. The staff gave us an extremely hard sell on the Purif rundown, which indeed sounded very helpful. My brother became very offended at (Name Withheld but I see he's gotten some honors) and hung up on him, never to look back. I, on the other hand, joined the staff, because I wanted services but couldn't afford them.
I had a fairly mundane time on staff in Seattle. The org was not very busy. I spent much of my time stuffing envelopes or handing out flyers. One late night, several SO members who were visiting ganged up on me and tried to convince me to join the SO. I was not the slightest bit interested. I'm not sure if they spent another evening on me, but they persisted with me, and I became very tired. Somebody read a brief passage written by LRH about sexual promiscuity being due to a lack of connection (or something similar) and a switch flipped in my brain, and I signed up, suddenly.
I headed to Los Angeles and started my EPF course at the scary blue building in Hollywood. I actually had fun with it. I experienced teamwork for the first time in my life and learned principles of productivity that were new to me. I enjoyed listening to the courses on old, worn out reel-to-reel tapes. I lost weight quickly, since I was active and had very little time to eat. I finished EPF in about 2 months. I remember crying for most of a day after speaking to my mother on the phone, she thought I had gone completely crazy. My dad actually came to see me from Montana. He had bought a very expensive plane ticket for me but I ended up not using it. He had also set up a meeting with Bent Corydon, author of Messiah or Madman (how I regret not meeting with him!).
I was assigned to train for my new job-Flag Representative to Seattle. My superior, Sophie, was pretty nice to me. I had some very interesting training courses, which I enjoyed . I had a lot of difficulty getting my stats up. I had to run "programs," some of which were quite simple, some were impossible. One week I had a very easy program in which I needed to only verify that certain items were available in the classrooms. My stats went high that week. The next week, the program had such tasks as: get the bookstore guy to hire 5 new people, sell 2,000 books, get x number of peole to sign up for auditing. Impossible, but I had to "make it go right," or my stats would suffer. I didn't dare face Ethics again (I had a scary event when I left my office door unlocked one time and 2 EOs were in there when I returned a few minutes later and I was downgraded to doubt, I think) and I really didn't want to go RPF, so I stole away one morning, called my mother for a bus ticket home (apologizing that I was quitting yet another endeavor, which she stated was quite alright), and just walked away the next day, no problem. I got a few phone calls but I would not consider returning, because I wasn't good enough to do the job assigned me.
Another complication was that I was not getting paid, and I was not supposed to be getting room and board, since Seattle was supposed to pay my way. Seattle had no income, so I had no income. I would sneak downstairs and steal leftovers to eat, or rice and beans. Also, I wasn't even supposed to be in the room where I slept, but I must have slipped through the cracks.
I felt really guilty about leaving, and it took about a year before I stopped thinking their way. So many strange things happened in that short period of time that I haven't thought about in years, I may write some of them here later.
Well, thanks for listening. If anyone recognizes my name or location, please say hello!
In 1988 at the age of 23, I was to be married, but my fiance lived in another state. I had started nursing school and he just quit calling me, and I could not reach him. He had simply disappeared. I became extremely depressed and quit school. I learned later that this was my "ruin."
I had read Battlefield Earth and I thought, "Wouldn't it be fun to work in an organization like that-so bureaucratic and comical!" Later (1989), I picked up a Dianetics book and found what I believed to be the answer to my woes-a way to be mentally healthy. My brother and I took a trip to Seattle to take the introductory course at $200+, can't recall the name of the course. The staff gave us an extremely hard sell on the Purif rundown, which indeed sounded very helpful. My brother became very offended at (Name Withheld but I see he's gotten some honors) and hung up on him, never to look back. I, on the other hand, joined the staff, because I wanted services but couldn't afford them.
I had a fairly mundane time on staff in Seattle. The org was not very busy. I spent much of my time stuffing envelopes or handing out flyers. One late night, several SO members who were visiting ganged up on me and tried to convince me to join the SO. I was not the slightest bit interested. I'm not sure if they spent another evening on me, but they persisted with me, and I became very tired. Somebody read a brief passage written by LRH about sexual promiscuity being due to a lack of connection (or something similar) and a switch flipped in my brain, and I signed up, suddenly.
I headed to Los Angeles and started my EPF course at the scary blue building in Hollywood. I actually had fun with it. I experienced teamwork for the first time in my life and learned principles of productivity that were new to me. I enjoyed listening to the courses on old, worn out reel-to-reel tapes. I lost weight quickly, since I was active and had very little time to eat. I finished EPF in about 2 months. I remember crying for most of a day after speaking to my mother on the phone, she thought I had gone completely crazy. My dad actually came to see me from Montana. He had bought a very expensive plane ticket for me but I ended up not using it. He had also set up a meeting with Bent Corydon, author of Messiah or Madman (how I regret not meeting with him!).
I was assigned to train for my new job-Flag Representative to Seattle. My superior, Sophie, was pretty nice to me. I had some very interesting training courses, which I enjoyed . I had a lot of difficulty getting my stats up. I had to run "programs," some of which were quite simple, some were impossible. One week I had a very easy program in which I needed to only verify that certain items were available in the classrooms. My stats went high that week. The next week, the program had such tasks as: get the bookstore guy to hire 5 new people, sell 2,000 books, get x number of peole to sign up for auditing. Impossible, but I had to "make it go right," or my stats would suffer. I didn't dare face Ethics again (I had a scary event when I left my office door unlocked one time and 2 EOs were in there when I returned a few minutes later and I was downgraded to doubt, I think) and I really didn't want to go RPF, so I stole away one morning, called my mother for a bus ticket home (apologizing that I was quitting yet another endeavor, which she stated was quite alright), and just walked away the next day, no problem. I got a few phone calls but I would not consider returning, because I wasn't good enough to do the job assigned me.
Another complication was that I was not getting paid, and I was not supposed to be getting room and board, since Seattle was supposed to pay my way. Seattle had no income, so I had no income. I would sneak downstairs and steal leftovers to eat, or rice and beans. Also, I wasn't even supposed to be in the room where I slept, but I must have slipped through the cracks.
I felt really guilty about leaving, and it took about a year before I stopped thinking their way. So many strange things happened in that short period of time that I haven't thought about in years, I may write some of them here later.
Well, thanks for listening. If anyone recognizes my name or location, please say hello!
Good for you for getting the hell outta there! It takes guts to blow so good for you!
