Jimmymac
Patron
I was an oot at flag, but in the late 90's. I was stuck in this constant ethics cycle, could get no one to audit me, hated f***** work-study, did not have a cent to my name to do washing etc, was making no progress on course etc etc all the stuff that is all your own "out ethics"
Plus I am Australian and my very worried parents were coming to the states to see me, go for a trip to New Orleans and NYC and see what the hell I had gotten mixed up in.
I decided that I would never get through the routing out for the trip with all the associated ethics checks etc and what do you say to your Wog parents, " sorry Mum and Dad but I cant see you until I get my ethics In". They would have gone nuts and all there worst fears but to there credit unspoken fears would have been confirmed. So in my own f***** up sci brain I was protecting the Group from enterbulation.
So I decided to blow. Any way I snuck back to the motels ( I think I stayed in the clipper at that point) down the road about a mile packed up my stuff fled to the phone box next to the motel ( the phone was sort of out of view of the motel security). I got busted some how by security and the deputy captain of oot (a guy called Jason I think who was always alright to me) who happened to be there doing something else. He pleaded with me etc (and I am a pretty big guy, I think he was afraid I was going to belt him) to stay and get handled and that he would personally make sure I could route out for leave in time etc. Any way he was true to his word.
I went away with my folks for a month had a good time and for some stupid reason I went back.
After 3 months of being back I was stuck in the same crap cycles all over again, so I decided I wanted to leave. I started to route out which consisted of basically doing work study the whole time, which to tell you the truth for about the first month I didn't mind that much, I was on it full time with some other people who I really liked and was doing different stuff every day, working in the book warehouse, doing renos at different sites or just generally slacking off doing nothing in one of Clearwater’s fine parks and gardens. Even CB kitchen work I didn't mind that much if I didn't have to do it that often.
After about 4 months of this though I had had enough not moving forward with my routing out back to my org becoming more and more despondent. I decided that any organisation that treated people like this I hated and I wanted out. I thought there is no point blowing, knowing that MAA had my passport and I had no money. I thought the only way I am going to get out of here was to feign suicidal thoughts. Hell it worked; I went to the 14 year old MAA for some usual crap and said to this girl, that I was suicidal. I said it in a calm clear voice, no melodrama or anything. You should have seen the look on this poor girls face. Anyway 3 hours later I was on the way to Tampa Airport with a ticket to LA (where I had some non sci friends) in my hand. I got to LA and that was the last time I had any much to do with Scientology.
I was always proud of myself being able to think of that scheme when my head was pretty F***** up and I was under enormous pressure.
Some other stuff:
The motels were run by this Swiss couple from FC, her name was Sarah (I think) and his I cant remember. He was okay but she was an absolute tyrant always yelling and screaming and scowling. One day I was on work-study in the middle of the day while almost all the other OOT’s where on course. I was gardening or something outside her room and all of a sudden she appeared in the window stark naked and dripping wet. (Let me tell you it was not a pleasant experience). She was always extra nice to me after that; I think she was afraid I was going to KR her.
The whole OOT group was always in trouble over 2d incidents (man were they obsessed with sex or what), it was always the “reason” the group was downstat and people were not getting through there courses etc. It was like the Stasi in East Germany with people writing KR’s for the most innocent incidents (x was 2d flowing with y etc) and not so innocent as well. One day they decided that they were going to clean us all up on the 2d ethics and sec checked all OOT’s. Heaps of people got busted for different thing (thoughts mostly I think) but there were about 6 OOT boys (both class v and SO) of about 16 years old who all ended up going through these major ethics cycles because well they were 16 years old boys and what do 16 year old boys do? Well I was 16 once and if you were a sixteen year old boy once you know what I am talking about.
Any way I glad I am out and this is really the first time I have spoken about since I left Scientology in 1999.
Plus I am Australian and my very worried parents were coming to the states to see me, go for a trip to New Orleans and NYC and see what the hell I had gotten mixed up in.
I decided that I would never get through the routing out for the trip with all the associated ethics checks etc and what do you say to your Wog parents, " sorry Mum and Dad but I cant see you until I get my ethics In". They would have gone nuts and all there worst fears but to there credit unspoken fears would have been confirmed. So in my own f***** up sci brain I was protecting the Group from enterbulation.
So I decided to blow. Any way I snuck back to the motels ( I think I stayed in the clipper at that point) down the road about a mile packed up my stuff fled to the phone box next to the motel ( the phone was sort of out of view of the motel security). I got busted some how by security and the deputy captain of oot (a guy called Jason I think who was always alright to me) who happened to be there doing something else. He pleaded with me etc (and I am a pretty big guy, I think he was afraid I was going to belt him) to stay and get handled and that he would personally make sure I could route out for leave in time etc. Any way he was true to his word.
I went away with my folks for a month had a good time and for some stupid reason I went back.
After 3 months of being back I was stuck in the same crap cycles all over again, so I decided I wanted to leave. I started to route out which consisted of basically doing work study the whole time, which to tell you the truth for about the first month I didn't mind that much, I was on it full time with some other people who I really liked and was doing different stuff every day, working in the book warehouse, doing renos at different sites or just generally slacking off doing nothing in one of Clearwater’s fine parks and gardens. Even CB kitchen work I didn't mind that much if I didn't have to do it that often.
After about 4 months of this though I had had enough not moving forward with my routing out back to my org becoming more and more despondent. I decided that any organisation that treated people like this I hated and I wanted out. I thought there is no point blowing, knowing that MAA had my passport and I had no money. I thought the only way I am going to get out of here was to feign suicidal thoughts. Hell it worked; I went to the 14 year old MAA for some usual crap and said to this girl, that I was suicidal. I said it in a calm clear voice, no melodrama or anything. You should have seen the look on this poor girls face. Anyway 3 hours later I was on the way to Tampa Airport with a ticket to LA (where I had some non sci friends) in my hand. I got to LA and that was the last time I had any much to do with Scientology.
I was always proud of myself being able to think of that scheme when my head was pretty F***** up and I was under enormous pressure.
Some other stuff:
The motels were run by this Swiss couple from FC, her name was Sarah (I think) and his I cant remember. He was okay but she was an absolute tyrant always yelling and screaming and scowling. One day I was on work-study in the middle of the day while almost all the other OOT’s where on course. I was gardening or something outside her room and all of a sudden she appeared in the window stark naked and dripping wet. (Let me tell you it was not a pleasant experience). She was always extra nice to me after that; I think she was afraid I was going to KR her.
The whole OOT group was always in trouble over 2d incidents (man were they obsessed with sex or what), it was always the “reason” the group was downstat and people were not getting through there courses etc. It was like the Stasi in East Germany with people writing KR’s for the most innocent incidents (x was 2d flowing with y etc) and not so innocent as well. One day they decided that they were going to clean us all up on the 2d ethics and sec checked all OOT’s. Heaps of people got busted for different thing (thoughts mostly I think) but there were about 6 OOT boys (both class v and SO) of about 16 years old who all ended up going through these major ethics cycles because well they were 16 years old boys and what do 16 year old boys do? Well I was 16 once and if you were a sixteen year old boy once you know what I am talking about.
Any way I glad I am out and this is really the first time I have spoken about since I left Scientology in 1999.