Rant Warning
Disclaimer: This is the opinion of one lurker who has benefitted greatly from this board. This may rub some of you raw, be forewarned. If it does, move on to something else.
/Edit
This is not a reply to nor a rant against Emma, this is more generally to some of the posters that haven't seemed to grasp to concept of this board.
/EndEdit
I'm going to highlight some points that I feel get ignored. I have posted a link to this thread in the past because of what I perceived as violations of the intent of this board. My highlights in
no way make less of any of the other points, just that these are some that I have seen occur here that have bothered
me, one lurker. I still lurk, I'm 99% done with all of Scn now, thanks to this board.
I'm writing this to clarify for all (including myself) what this board is for.
As an ex Scientologist, I felt like there was no place where I could truly be myself.
I felt pressured to conform to a certain set of "rules" about how to think about Scientology & my experience inside Scientology. I was sick of getting abused for defending ex's who found even a glimmer of goodness in Scientology. I was upset that there seemed to be no safe place for ex's to go to
share their experiences, both good and bad.
Over the last 3 weeks or so I've been given a lot of advice about what I should and shouldn't do and who I should and shouldn't have on the board. Some want it this way, and some want it that way. Others want it a some other way.
Some say I should have had all this sorted out before I launched the board. Maybe I should have. Some complain that the rules seem to be forming as we go along. I can't deny there is an element of that as I learn what people want and need.
Maybe my idea of just providing a place for ex's to talk was too simple. I don't think it was, but perhaps it need a further defining.
What this board is:
A place where ex scientologists and interested general public can get together to discuss various experiences in Scientology.
A place where where ex's and non ex's can mingle and chat and get to know how the other half think and live.
A place to learn from each other.
A place to support each other.
A place to swap ideas and suggestions.
A place to civilly debate issues so that other viewpoints can be offered and tossed around and horizons can be broadened.
A place to be allowed to defend your position and not apologise for it, yet at the same time allow others to have their own.
A place that people feel safe to expose the abuses of this harmful cult, so the true story can be told.
A place where newly "out" Scientologists can come and be heard and learn and be supported through a really tough period in their lives.
A place to make people laugh and have some fun and to not take it all so seriously.
A place to expose the traps and pitfalls in returning to a "normal" existance, and to learn some tips and helpful suggestions in making this transition.
What this board isn't:
A vehicle to exact verbal revenge on those who have harmed us both inside and outside of Scientology. By that I mean continuing to trade insults & flame wars that are a hang over from past relationships, fueds from other messageboards, chat channels etc.
A place to blame and crucify others for what happened to you. Over time there are going to be people who find other ex members who they feel were responsible for some cruelty that was bestowed on them. Whilst this is understandable, and needs to be addressed, it needs to be understood that EVERYONE did things in Scientology of which they are not proud.
A place to ridicule "believers". People find their way out of the Scientology mindset at different speeds and to different degrees. What they need is understanding, not to be fobbed off and called a "stoopid clam" etc.
________________________________________
I believe anyone who has been exposed to Scientology for any length of time has had damage done. None of us are perfect, and I doubt any of us would be here if we were all 100% "recovered".
My hope is that this group of misfits can do some good, for ourselves and for each other.
I know there will be differing opinions. I know tempers will flare. I know people will say things they don't necessarily mean. All I ask is that you think before you type and ask yourself if what you are about to "submit" is going to cause more harm than good.
You don't need to like everybody on this board. That would be impossible. It is no different in the workplace or even in family life. But in these situations a "professional" or cordial relationship is established instead. I hope these same social rules can be adopted here.
I've been criticized for wanting to turn this into a "knitting club" or "afternoon tea party". I think that is bullshit. I don't believe that civility automatically means softness or sensorship. I believe that MORE exposure of the harms of Scientology can be achieved if the atmosphere is civil and friendly rather than one of fear. In other words, I don't want to play "momma", handling spats between people. This is not supposed to be a sandpit. If you want to play the flaming game for the mere sake of flaming, then alt.religion.scientology may be the place for you.
I don't know exactly what the stats are of people (staff & public) blowing Scientology. But I know there are 1000s and 1000s of people who will be looking for a place like this to help them. When they do start to look, I hope they will find that this board is designed for them. A friendly, civil, intelligent crowd who have had years of experience in and out of Scientology waiting to welcome them.
Thanks,
Emma
Warning: ranting and generalities follow.
This place is the best place on the net for those on the fence, in doubt, curious, declared, not in good standing, etc., etc., etc. Everyone is different, it will take different amounts of time for each person to come to terms with what they experienced (or are still experiencing) in regards to their stint in Scn. Not everyone will leave it fully. Some will find other technologies, some with squirrel, some may even remain in, who cares. The whole point is to give people a place to look at ALL sides.
Damn, how the hell can one evaluate anything with all the logical fallacies that seem to fly off of some of your keyboards. Fine, point those out as they occur, but dispense with violating the above post, the above reasons for this board. In my opinion, to be helpful to those mentioned above, relay your experiences and link facts. State your opinions as opinions and stop spouting your opinions as fact. Do you not actually know the difference between those two concepts?
Seriously, if you don't like it here, and you don't like these rules, go to OCMB or ARS or some other forum which will pander to
what I perceive as your apparent need to be
right. Violating Emma's intent for this board
does not help people who come here for its purpose, it will drive them away, get it? No, seriously, do you actually
get it?
It amazes me how much I see some posters flip to the complete other extreme of the pendulum. I suspect that these folks were just as gung ho and, in my opinion, blinded by their zeal as much in as they are out. What part of "People find their way out of the Scientology mindset at different speeds and to different degrees." is actually, honestly, sincerely confusing to some of you? No, everyone will
not end up thinking exactly like you. Come on, what the fuck. That's the same robotic mindset that you're complaining about, you just want people to have that robotic mindset on the other side of the pendulum. That's not freedom of thought, that's more mental slavery, get a fucking clue already.
Rant has ended.
Here's, generally, what I did to come out of the fog that I was personally in. This is by no means comprehensive but an overview.
I started just reading every thread and getting an idea of who was around, what viewpoints they had, etc.
I PM'd a few folks with some questions I had and opinions I wanted, and those were answered. Thank you, I value those.
I took my Basics and started from the beginning; using the internet I tried to substantiate the claims made in the materials. You know what's funny, I didn't even get through DTOT before I found too many holes (mind you I was merely looking to substantiate the claims) and got rid of my desire to pursue that line of study any further. This, by the way, led me to finding LRH's death certificate, info on his military history, etc.
In the meantime I was reading stories and experiences of those that were in all the way from Alan and Dart to those who had only brief experiences with Scn, and any and all in between. I didn't engage in or watch much of the debates going on as I was mostly interested in experiences. BFG, LBV and other ex-Int folks' stories were helpful to me as I was not up in that area but have long suspected something not right in that area.
I read up on Knowledgism and Idenics. I read up on various other philosophies, such as Buddhism and found, for me, that what I had agreed with in Scn actually had already existed in other places, for far less money or free even. I studied up on logic and critical thinking and basically started questioning everything. Does this make actual sense? Can this be substantiated? Do I have subjective or objective reality on this? Can I obtain subjective or objective experience with this?
I tried different things out and after a few months, boom, the Scn think is mostly gone from what I can tell. I suspect there is still some more for me to get rid of, but at this point it's so minor I don't even think much of it these days.
I still know a LOT of Scn's who will likely need this board at some point. Keep it true to Emma's intent or GTFO.
Thanks and have a nice day.
P.S. Emma, keep up the great work!