My story from inside Scientology/Sea Org

Lulu Belle

Moonbat
I just wanted to clarify something for Div 6.

Where Scientology orgs have been run by people who have been both interested in helping others and good at running organizations they have been relatively successful. One of the best I saw - and most unsung - was Bern Org in the lat 70's when it was run by Alois Eisenring. It was an org that was steadily expanding because they planned their recruitment, the staff at the lowest end actually received the minimum pay, not great but not bad either. Alois annual pay was around what would be reasonable for the director f a small non-profit organization. Happy field and so on. Good guy running it, knew what he was doing.

I don't remember the HUbbard policies that were brought up but something about recruitment to excess, someone holding down expansion (in an org that had been expanding for almost 2 years...) Alois (he was SO) was removed and ended up at the FB I think, the org got totalled, usual story.

But that whole evolution - good guy doing something well and then getting smashed for it - IS SCIENTOLOGY. That's what Hubbard created. There were good mission holders, Scientology and Hubbard smashed them. It is part of the unworkable system that Hubbard created. The Sea Org was one of the things he used in order to do what he considered to be his system.


Yeah. Same with John Woodruff in Orange County.

A good businessman who believed in treating his staff right. Paying them well, treating them well. When you do that, you get good people. When you get good people to work for you, you get a quality organization.

COS management managed to fuck that up, too.
 

petraph33

Patron with Honors
wow - Gail is out? That is surprising news indeed. I wonder where she went? Did she go home to Oz? She had a swiss passport because of her marriage to Stephan I wonder if she kept it after they divorced. Was Eva still married to Jim Boyd? I did like both of them.

Bev was the chairman of my last comm ev in the SO - I really don't have much good to say about her - and 'tough' is not how I would describe her, LOL.

Heinz I heard routed out and was back in Stuttgart. Did you meet Toni Kinzl the Auditor editor?

Did you ever meet Helen Covary-Fritsch in your Hamburg days? I am not sure she was still around there in 86.


Yes, Gail left in the beginning of the 90's she went off with someone, don't know where, but was a 2D thing. Eva was still married to Jim Boyd, but I think he got declared at some point or kicked out. Not sure why, but I was a member of a Com-Ev that involved him. Could be because of one of the sons IIRC.
Don't know Toni Kinzl, but I know Helen Covary-Fritsch, not well though. Just seen her some time.
 

Bea Kiddo

Crusader
Thanks Petraph for your story. Its interesting seeing all these names....

I think Bev D'Abrey got declared for some reason. Emma is at Flag on the SuperPower project (Bev's daughter). She was up till 2002 or so at least. Who knows now.

---


I remember when I was in the SO and the big Hamburg thing happened, a big question was: If the org was empty, how were they making the payments to Flag? A large org making alot of income would be required to send quite a bit to the mother orgs.

Auditing someone very involved with the orgs back then, I discovered: because of the attacks in Germany at the time, alot of that was let to slide (as were other things.... ha ha). Also there was another org that was making payments FOR Hamburg org. They were taking money from another org to pay management "from HBG".

The lies and cover-up were extensive.

----

Also, there were Sea Org members at CLO level who spotted the false reports and cover-ups and tried to go into the org to investigate and the ED refused to let them in the org and reported them uplines and RTC ordered them out of the org. NO-ONE LOCAL WAS ALLOWED TO GO INTO HBG. It was protected by RTC. And directly run by them too.

----

One of the main "SP's" in Germany, that the church was trying to handle at the time was the landlord for the building Hamburg org was in. Guess who was boffing him? The ED.

And the soap opera continues.

I was not there. I only tell from the stories from someone who was very much involved.
 

Tanstaafl

Crusader
I remember when I was in the SO and the big Hamburg thing happened, a big question was: If the org was empty, how were they making the payments to Flag? A large org making alot of income would be required to send quite a bit to the mother orgs.

IIRC, payments to Flag are at the "discretion" of the FBO, which is his/her main stat. In the past there has been at least one, charmingly named, "financial dictatorship" which effectively bypasses the usual FP line and puts approval under CLO, not the FBO of the org.

It never made sense to me that payments to Flag, however small, were still made while orgs were insolvent and lengthening the duration of the longest unpaid bill - more flaps.

I guess running up unpaid bills while falsifying the cash-bills stat and making payments to Flag would be a short-term way to do this - a recipe for disaster, of course.

Org finance policy may or may not work, but once an org is operating in a chronic "below make-break point" condition, everything falls to pieces and you get stuff like the bookstore account being "robbed" to give staff some pay, etc.

When I was on staff, I would estimate that the make-break point for income was roughly 20x what an org would bring in during a typical week.
 

Div6

Crusader
<Snip>
NO-ONE LOCAL WAS ALLOWED TO GO INTO HBG. It was protected by RTC. And directly run by them too.

----

One of the main "SP's" in Germany, that the church was trying to handle at the time was the landlord for the building Hamburg org was in. Guess who was boffing him? The ED.

And the soap opera continues.

I was not there. I only tell from the stories from someone who was very much involved.


Unbelievable.

More from "Davey the Overt Product Maker Miscavige".
 

Dulloldfart

Squirrel Extraordinaire
IIRC, payments to Flag are at the "discretion" of the FBO, which is his/her main stat. In the past there has been at least one, charmingly named, "financial dictatorship" which effectively bypasses the usual FP line and puts approval under CLO, not the FBO of the org.

It never made sense to me that payments to Flag, however small, were still made while orgs were insolvent and lengthening the duration of the longest unpaid bill - more flaps.

I was FBO at SH for 18 months in 1974/5 and again for 18 months in 1980/81.

The idea was that by sending money to Flag it would raise the org's necessity level to make money.

Two little stories on the FBO Network and sending money to Flag:

1. When I came on post as FBO in 1980 one of the first things I did was a "Bank Rec", a simple reconciliation to see how much money was in the FBO's bank accounts. It's something one would do every week. So guess what? The FBO #1 Account had a reconciled balance of MINUS £18,000. At the time, I thought the previous post holder (Pauline Chatterton, holding the post from above as FBOUK) didn't know how to do a bank rec. The actual balance at any one time hovered around a few thousand, but that was because of the current this-week's income banked into the account and cheques that had been written but not yet cleared.

I wrote it up and fixed it in about a month by not sending any money to Flag at all, but instead just setting aside the usual Flag payment to pay back the account.

2. This was around 1983. I had been completely off all finance lines for two years. I went onto the post of AO Tech Sec, and grabbed the hat of FP Chairman because no-one else was really wearing it. After a couple of weeks I noticed some oddities and did a bit of investigation into the org's finances. I then wrote this scathing report to Flag and elsewhere about what I had found. The org's financial position had worsened by about £200,000 since I had been taken off post. The org VAT account, setasides to pay accrued VAT, had been wiped out. The org's setasides for possible refunds/repayments had been wiped out. The org's reserves had gone. And get this: the org's FBO Accounts were deeply overdrawn (again). Which meant that the FBO (Dawn Crundall) was borrowing money from the bank to send to Flag!

I wish I had kept a copy of that report. :)

Paul
 

Tanstaafl

Crusader
Paul - very interesting. Thanks.

I guess the idea with implementing theories based on the motivational quality of necessity levels is: check your staff aren't in apathy first. :)

These situations betray, among other things, a significant weakness in the personal stat system, especially when it's backed up by penalties/punishment.
There's too much pressure on individuals to keep their personal stats so "greatest good" solutions go out the window.
 

Mick Wenlock

Admin Emeritus (retired)
Yes, Gail left in the beginning of the 90's she went off with someone, don't know where, but was a 2D thing. Eva was still married to Jim Boyd, but I think he got declared at some point or kicked out. Not sure why, but I was a member of a Com-Ev that involved him. Could be because of one of the sons IIRC.
Don't know Toni Kinzl, but I know Helen Covary-Fritsch, not well though. Just seen her some time.

Jim Boyd declared? I am gobsmacked. He was on the Int Fin Police Razzia that declared me in 1982 and even despite that I still liked him.

I saw that Fredy was working in Switzerland for the IAS - do you know if Hildegard also moved down there?

I heard that Bernd Mottl was the CO for a while - he was one of my course sups when I was CO. A good guy.



I remember Helen from when there was only a mission in Hamburg - waaay before your time!
 

petraph33

Patron with Honors
Jim Boyd declared? I am gobsmacked. He was on the Int Fin Police Razzia that declared me in 1982 and even despite that I still liked him.

I saw that Fredy was working in Switzerland for the IAS - do you know if Hildegard also moved down there?

I heard that Bernd Mottl was the CO for a while - he was one of my course sups when I was CO. A good guy.



I remember Helen from when there was only a mission in Hamburg - waaay before your time!

Bernd Mottl was not the CO as far as I know. It was Bernd Koertel, he is still the CO as far as I know. He has been on that post for over 15 years by now if that is true. It seems like people at lower levels are not being busted that much anymore. I wonder if there is someone who has more recent info on the CLO/CMO/AOSH EU scene??? :wave:
 

Mick Wenlock

Admin Emeritus (retired)
Bernd Mottl was not the CO as far as I know. It was Bernd Koertel, he is still the CO as far as I know. He has been on that post for over 15 years by now if that is true. It seems like people at lower levels are not being busted that much anymore. I wonder if there is someone who has more recent info on the CLO/CMO/AOSH EU scene??? :wave:

oh, thanks for the clarification, Koertel eh? He was a different sup! LOL

If he has been CO for 15 years he has my respects indeed.
 

xenusdad

Patron with Honors
Good Stuff

Great Story!
Did you know Dave Griffiths? He is my brother and I want to save him.
He disconnected form me last week by phone.
:nervous:
 

petraph33

Patron with Honors
Great Story!
Did you know Dave Griffiths? He is my brother and I want to save him.
He disconnected form me last week by phone.
:nervous:

Yes I remember David, he was the SSO staff section officer in the qualifications division of AOSH EU when I was still there. He was actually a good friend of mine then. He has also worked for a while in the Gold Rep office in the CLO EU. Do not know where he is now or what he is doing, as I am out now for 7 years. I wish I could give you some good tips to get him out, but I don't have any bright ideas, otherwise I would have gotten a lot of my old friends out already. I do feel now though that things are definitely falling apart from the top of the Scn structure down, with the internet news travel so fast now and people won't be joining them anymore either.

I would love to get some more recent news from Europe if there is any newcomers that would like to give some?

Best of luck with your bro..... :yes:
 

Sharone Stainforth

Silver Meritorious Patron
I am very pleased for you Xenu's Dad. That is great news. Lets hope you will see him soon and his blinders will fall off.

Best wishes for you,and your brother.
Sharone
 

AnonKat

Crusader
Update: 24/10/10, I've just heard from my mother that my SO brother is out!

Still a scilon but out of the SO, yay!

Another One Leaves The Cult is playing loudly!

http://forums.whyweprotest.net/291-...ting-my-sea-argh-brother-52976/3/#post1342402

Party !

lolcat-high-5.jpg
 

AnonyMary

Formerly Fooled - Finally Free
Update: 24/10/10, I've just heard from my mother that my SO brother is out!

Still a scilon but out of the SO, yay!

Another One Leaves The Cult is playing loudly!

http://forums.whyweprotest.net/291-...ting-my-sea-argh-brother-52976/3/#post1342402

Hi xenusdad, aka pedrofcuk, aka Peter! Such good news! Thanks for all your efforts to expose Scientology and your excellent protest videos on YouTube.

Standing outside the mission, you notice the place is empty and staff usually there by then have not arrived. You decide to give them a call : "Hi... Pete Griffiths here. How the hell are you going to clear the planet when you're not even open" Too funny!http://www.youtube.com/user/pedrofcuk#p/u/3/3cNofumLXMg

Great to see Mark Bunker joined the protest and that you recorded it!

October 9th 2010 Dublin protest From: pedrofcuk | October 10, 2010 | 417 views

33rd monthy protest against the fraud and abuses of the "Church" of Scientology. With special guest Mark Bunker from XENU TV. http://www.anonireland.org

I'm sure the angels are watching over matters :0
 
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AnonyMary

Formerly Fooled - Finally Free
petraph33! Thanks so much for writing your story :happydance: You did an excellent job of showing what was going on at the time. :thumbsup: I hope you and your father have been able to reconnect by now.
Best wishes, ~ Mary

It was in the middle of the week when my brother, Harald, came home from work, around 8pm at night, and asked my mother, father and grandma if they wanted to find out about something exciting. My father was sceptical, but eventually they all sat down in the sitting room, and he opened the Dianetics book. I did not understand much he talked about really, and I did not pay much attention either, but when he talked about the theta-mind-body idea, I was all ears.

I thought to myself “wow, this is absolutely amazing, I am not just a body, I am a spirit and I can advance as a spirit, and there is an organization that one can work with/in that makes people go free!” So I decided to join my brother next time he goes there, just to find out what exactly this is all about. He then actually took me with him and I ended up in a smallish kind of office/centre, the Celebrity Centre Hamburg, where people are very friendly and helpful. There seems to be lots going on and there is a buzz about this place, so I am getting interested. I get immediately involved into stuffing promotional pieces into envelopes while I wait to speak to someone. Making a long story short, I was hooked and actually started working as a helper, being 15 years of age, to earn my first training course, the communications-course. Here I end up in the course room for the first time, and while I find it very unusual that persons are being shoved around (upper indoc TRs) I do adjust to it quickly as everyone else seems to think this is normal. Well, I would be doing it shortly myself and be made to see that this actually “works” – you can control your conversations and persons and thus what you want to talk about and where you want someone to go in a positive manner – well if you have positive intentions that is. Next I got to meet the Supervisor. John Scott Webb, who was so “uptone” and helpful, but at the same time absolutely ruthless on the application of study tech that I immediately got the KSW viewpoint from him. They really got that in on the newest persons right then and there as in this small organisation the Div 6 and 4 course rooms where in the same place. He of course was Flag trained as a supervisor.

The year is 1986 and I am just about to turn 16 years of age. After most of the Div 6 courses, that I could either earn myself or get my mother to pay for, my mother gets hooked as well and we start the purif together it is just before my birthday, in the middle of summer and we do it together. These vitamins and oils took something to get used to, but overall it was a positive experience – after all we were setting ourselves up to be ready for a possible nuclear explosion and be immune against radiation! I went onto the Student Hat from there. While on the student hat, I was being interviewed because my father did not agree with the fact that I was in this organisation and I was given the basics of PTS training, the “ups and downs of life” course. I learned about how suppressive persons hinder the progress of those who want to be free and how to handle it. It all made perfect sense, but right there I was alienated from my father and also my grandma, who also had objections. I got so well indoctrinated that I was sure that my father and gran had suppressive tendencies and that I either had to handle or disconnect from them. It was only a “good roads good weather” handling at that stage and I was allowed to go on with my training. I was still on the student hat when I was approached by one of the Network Staff – the Flag Representative (the one representing the management org) to join staff and for me that was a great honour, being 16 years of age now and nearly done with my formal basic school education, I thought this is the best I could do: join this organisation and work very hard to help “clear the planet” and set persons free and make them more able. With all the information I received from the spectacular events being held by Int Management, and all the wins always being told by the people in the course room at night, this was the way to go. Funny enough, it was after LRH had died and there was not much talking about that, it was all so future and expansion oriented. Int Management made Video briefings for the staff about the ingredients of expansion and the 339R programs going along with it to expand the org to Saint Hill Size now!

I did not hear any negative things and the only thing negative was the suppressive elements outside that wanted to prevent people from going free, including the tax office, that wanted to close down Scientology or was investigating the organisations. So I followed the advise to not watch TV or read the newspapers as this was all bad news anyways. So there I was, still going to school for a couple of month and riding on a bus for one hour after school every day to the org and to be on post part time. I made the required 40 hours by also spending my weekends there, which disconnected me from my school friends, who were not interested in Scientology.


I was now living in the well indoctrinated and isolated inside world of Scientology and everything that was against it was bad. Obviously. Right after I completed school, my father wanted me to start a formal education but I wanted none of that, I was totally on the band wagon to clear the planet. So the PTS handlings started all over again, and by now it had torn such a rift between myself, my grandma, my father and my school friends that the only way out was to disconnect – per LRH. As my mother also wanted to stay in Scientology and as there had been friction in their marriage beforehand, the divorce was inevitable and I decided to stay with my mother. So we moved away from home and lived together in an apartment, getting on with our training.

Right around that time, a mission arrived in the Org. Tiziano Fracassetti and Jean-Pierre Muley from the CLO EU. It was two men in Sea Org uniforms that were there to recruit for the Networks – the Flag Rep post and the LRH Comm post. The FR had to be Sea Org to properly represent Management, and as the current FR (Michael) was an LSD case (or so he said, which was found out later not to be the case…) he had to be replaced as he was not qualified to join the SO. I found the SO presence and dedication of this mission amazing and did not need to be interviewed. I signed up and preps were made to send me off to my Sea Org training. I was so happy. My mother found it a bit hard, but she let me go because “it was for the greatest good, for the greatest number of dynamics” and she let me make my own decisions. So off I went, but before I could leave, I had to get a signature from my father, so I could go and get a VISA for the US, as part of my training would be done there. I was drilled for several hours to handle him with “good roads, good weather” and other PTS technology and I got that signature. My father said that he did not want to have anything to do with me anymore if I go, and literally, this was a disconnection rather then a handling. But I got what I wanted (at that time) and so it went.

I arrived at the Continental Liaison Office EU in Copenhagen for my product 0 – the first of the Sea org training courses, the EPF. I had to fill out a life history and get a meter check and do all the tests – OCA, IQ, Leadership and Aptitude. Then I was ready to start. I spent some weeks, I think about 4-6 on the EPF, and just before I completed, I was told I had to do the rest of my training in Los Angeles as I was part of a Command Team that was to be send to one of the Advanced Orgs. I had worked in the FR’s office in the Class V organisation and was qualified to go and do this special training and then come back into the Advanced Org as part of a Command Team. I already had my VISA and off I went. I had never been on a plane before, so was very excited. It took over 13 hours to arrive in Los Angeles. And I had a stop over in NY, where I experienced my first antagonism directly against Scn from the outside world. I had taken the mailpack from the CLO with me and due to the change of flight had to go through customs with it. It was quite big and bulky and I was told to tell them there was letters and administrative papers inside – but surely I did not really know what was in there. I arrived at the customs, and was told “Church of Scientology? – open this!” I did not have much time to fetch my plane, but luckily one of the custom persons helped me to close the pack again after it was ripped open. I found those persons very antagonistic and thought to myself that they must be connected to the government offices that try to stop Scientology. I was so well indoctrinated at that time, and was part of the elite on the planet (or so I was told…) and there could not be any other reason but SPs and overts and withholds connected with those attacks and antagonistic approaches.

I made it to catch my plane and was supposed to be collected at the LA airport, but no one was there to collect me. I called the FCB (Flag Command Bureaux) and got told to take a taxi, so I did. I was very scared to be all alone in this city but told myself to “put my TRs in” and so I managed to arrive at the “complex” – the big blue – just about one hour later. It was late at night when I arrived, so I was just introduced to the Flag Flag Rep Yusha Turrol, and the Supergargo FCB at that time Carmen Cenador as well as her sister Vicky, and then sent to sleep to report for study in the morning.

I was put into a bunk bedroom with about 15-18 other girls, bunk beds 3 beds high, and did not see anything as it was so dark. This was not what I expected the International Management Orgs berthing to be like, but hey – I was just here for training. I was just a trainee and had a lot to learn. So I took it all in and adhered to what I was told. The next morning, and the coming 8-12 weeks I was training very hard to be sent on a Garrison Mission to the Advanced org in my Continent. 3 other persons were going with me, all sent to training at the FCB as well. There was a new Captain, Martin Pimont, an LRH Comm Tiziano Fracassetti, an FBO Jean-Yves and myself. We got our Garrison Mission Orders (which is a long term mission that gets started up with an actual SO mission going with it, and then the Garrison Mission continues with the members of it reporting every week to Management). As the FR, the one who enforces programs and orders from Management, I was made to be the Insurance Missionaire – the one that makes sure they get done and reports about the other members doing their Mission Orders.

Eventually the day came and our Mission was to fire. An Evaluation and accompanying program was made of the Advanced Organisation and everyone had their program targets to get done. We were fully briefed and sent out with a Flag Mission to start our new posts as a Garrison Mission. I learned a lot about Management operations while in training and also while being on Mission in that Advanced org. Now came the time when I had to show what I learned and get compliance to management programs and report about the internal situation of the org to management. I was their eyes and ears. My mentality at that time was to not be too much part of the local team, so I would be able to report out ethics and other situations to management and not be compromised. I was drilled to do this well while I was in training.

About 1 year after I started on that post, as FR in the advanced org, my senior the Continental FR, Brigitte Werngren, became pregnant and based on the Flag Order about Sea Org members and children, (FOs are references and issues that tell management how to operate) which was issued by the Executive Director International, she had to be “cleaned up in ethics” and sent to a lower org. I was chosen to be her replacement. I then recovered, with my senior’s help, a former Flag Rep for the Network, Stephan Schulz, that was able to re-do his EPF and take over the FR of the AO post for me. All that was done in a couple of weeks and it was now the year 1989. April to be exact. I remember that well, because I also just had attested to “past life Clear”.

Well now I was part of the Continental Liaison Office and the Network Coordination Committee. I was at that time at the same level and could issue orders to the CO of the CLO. Just after I arrived, the command channels of Scientology changed, and the CO CLO, Coline Ravachol, was at the top with no direct juniors, and the CO FOLO at that time Angelo Scozzi, and the FOLO staff were made in charge of the management of the organisations in the Continent. I was now at the same level than the CO FOLO. During those years, the LRH birthday game was the top priority, and it was going quite well for the continent in that game for years. ED International had been the Commanding officer for the Cont before the current CO CLO and there was a lot of “successful actions” and Ron’s advices for the continent to enforce. Some orgs started reaching Saint Hill size and broad marketing campaigns started, with the Marketing Exec Int, Ronnie Miscavige and Div 6 Internal Exec Int Diana hubbard, visiting the Cont. Executive Director conferences got held to keep everyone in check.

RTC was becoming prominent in orgs with the Divisional Summaries and the Power Quality Checklist HCO Policy Letters being issued. Orgs were now being directly inspected by RTC to ensure they comply with Keeping Scientology working. It was very exciting days, except that all the standard command lines of Scientology seemed to be bypassed now and the stats were crashing. Nevertheless, the Birthday game was still going reasonably well and it looked very promising until one Thursday when we called to collect the weekly stats of the orgs, and the Commanding Officer CMO International answered the phone in HBG org and told us to basically get lost. Yes, one of the orgs had been taken over by International Management as it’s Executive Director< Wiebke Hansen had blown from the International LRH Birthday event celebrations at the FSO due to false stats. This org had just gotten its RTC pass after an inspection by COB personally and was all over the International Scientology news as the ideal org. What a flap. What a situation.

The CO CLO, Coline, was ordered to come to the org to speak to the Int management terminals there, and when she came back it was seriously lower conditions and justice hanging over our heads. Something was going to change. It was never going to be the same again then. All management Data files got computerized, RTC Checklists were being executed by the LRH Comm NW and it became a very serious business indeed. KSW was the name of the game now, and if you did move just one step out of line, you ended up in ethics trouble. Well, soon enough now the New Era of Management was upon us bringing a whole new executive structure to the CLO. Everyone of them picked and trained at International Management under COBs supervision. The new Command team consisted of Wlater Kotrich as the CO CLO and his Wife Zara as the D/COI, Odile Mueller as the LRH Comm EU, Sarah Fear as the Esto NW I/C, Giorgio Rossi as the Cont FR, and some others. All the former executives were moved to lower org board posts, or send on the “vets return program” to be recycled basically. They were send to Flag Management for an ethics and sec checking program, to be then used as Missionaires and eventually be used as coins or re-assigned to suitable posts. I was kept in the CLO on Management lines and was now made the A/Pgms Aide, the person responsible for the running of all the Class V orgs and the AO. I was made to understand lots of times that I was part of the “old management team” and was an easy target “who” for investigations. I was on and off that post and on and off the decks and in and out of lower conditions for about 3 years.

What had happened now is that RTC Representatives, in CLO EU it was Antonella Tisi, were in every continent and supervising the delivery of the OT levels, and the implementation of the Golden age of Tech in every CLO and the orgs and especially the AO. It was very serious and a heavy ethics period set in. I had to report directly to the RTC Rep that was positioned directly in the AO, every Thursday on every target done on the IG NW Bulletins and programs and propose handlings for every org that was not in compliance. It was going for weeks on end that we were sitting in meetings to handle the non compliant orgs, with no breaks, and about 3-4 hours sleep at night. Stats were pushed up due to the amount of GAT programs and persons now having to do training again, and persons were getting their grades auditing again and all that, but there was no real expansion, so stats inevitably collapsed. I was busted off post and sent on the decks, without any Com-ev, and a Board of Investigation was held without me being present. I was removed from post after an investigation was done by the CMO, approved by the local RTC rep, and then a Board of investigation was held by the CMO, without interviewing me and I was found guilty. I started to wonder at that point what was going on. This was not what I had “signed up for” all the fun had gone out of this. I was then re-assigned to being the ED of DK Fdn, as the ED of that org, was needed by RTC to go for NOTS training to launch the GAT for OTs. It seemed all like a big bulldozer with only RTCs orders now being ruthlessly enforced on an or-else basis.

With the New Era of Management Command Team coming into the CLO, everyone was put on extensive ethics programs, with lots of clay demos and also mest work and even EDs of Class V orgs were called to the CLO to go through these programs. The CLO got a facelift with renos being done every week to make it all look good. Just before that all SO members were on all-hands to renovate the AO completely.

As the ED of a local org, I was happy to have a post again, but did not agree with the way things were going. 9/11 happened then and all the Volunteer Minister actions started as well, and it was the first time I actually got to know news that happened in the outside world. I was so disconnected before that. At one point while being the ED of the local org I was helping to recover a former Class VI auditor and get him to pay his freeloader bill and join the SO, so that he could go for NOTS auditor training for the CLO. I was still considered FOLO/CLO staff, again on Garrison Mission in that local org. The recruitment cycle had come to a point where I wanted to go visit that prospect to help him complete his ethics handling to be signed up for the SO and I wrote a CSW for 4 days to go there and do it. The CO FOLO, Fabio Bravi, agreed, and my senior the Programs Chief Lotte Drewsen approved it in writing. So off I went. I did not realize what I had missed when I enjoyed those couple of days away from the Sea Org discipline and ruthless schedules. I just felt a tiny longing for real freedom inside me at that point. I did not decide to leave, but it was lurking in me then. I did not ever have any holidays in all those years I was in the SO until then. There was just never any time. And I had been disconnected from my father and seldom had seen my mother and brother. There was no time for such family matters, the expansion of Scientology and clearing this planet was that much more important.

So I went to see this prospect, and actually stayed in his home for the 4 days. I did have letter contact with him before and he had been visiting the CLO for recruitment interviews, and when I was the ED of the local org, I got him over for a concert that we both went to and this friendship had somehow turned into more. I thought for myself that there might be a relationship in store – if he joins the SO. Other SO members had noticed that and I also told some of them. It was all in my mind. And I think in his mind too, but nothing physical had happened at all.

After those 4 days, I returned to the CLO/my local org, and one day later was called over to the CMO for ethics interviews. I was to be taken off post and put on the decks and get com-ev’d for this unauthorized leave and for starting a relationship/going out-2D with a non-so member. I could not believe it. All the LRH references available were used and twisted to make me see it. I refused to agree. I did nothing wrong. The CO FOLO was called in and he said he never approved me to go in the first place, and this is where I snapped. I decided to leave. This had turned into something nowhere close to what I though it was going to be and after over 15 years I finally had enough and smelled the coffee. This was no place anymore for me. I made my intentions known to the HCO staff, and they immediately put me under watch with a person following me and even sitting in front of my bedroom 24/7. I told them I would not blow because, at that time, I still had the intention to carry on as a public Scientologist. Now I spent 8 months on the leaving routing form, doing renovations work and working in the kitchen for weeks on end, while waiting to get through all my sec checks and other ethics programs, was told that I was full of misunderstoods and people searched my private stuff while I was not there. I was made to clay several Policy letters and was really loosing it with all this mental abuse. I just wanted to leave. Stop to be yelled at, put under “non enturbulation order” and other things, just to make me stay. I eventually made it out and will never forget the day I was sitting on the train to go to live with my brother for a couple of days before moving back in with my mother. I felt still haunted for weeks after that, thinking that I am going to be told to go back for more mental abuse.
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I then had to find my way in the wog world and that was very hard. I had never had a bank account, had not watched television for years and literally had no idea what was going on in the world. I got myself a job, with no formal education and started a new life. I have never looked back since. I am a very happy person now and just too glad that I made it out. I did try to be a Scientologist and continue up the Bridge when I was out, but that lasted for only about 6 months, after being told that I had to pay tens of thousands for my freeloader bill and being harassed with phone calls to do so, and after being told that I cannot FSM without my certificated (by Fields Exec Int) and that I am basically a degraded being because I left the SO, I decided to leave for real. Something was wrong and 4 years after I left, I eventually typed the word Scientology into the Google search engine and found out what was really going on. I wanted to make former friends aware of this and got SP declared for doing so. My brother disconnected from me for that.
Well, I am so glad this is all behind me now.
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That is my story in a nutshell. There is a lot more details and if any of you have any specific questions, feel free to ask me.

I want to say thanks to Emma and Mick for setting up those message boards for people to speak freely and find out what is really going on.
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petraph33

Patron with Honors
Thank you, it took some doing to write ths story but I am happy I did, and yes, just two weeks ago, my father got back in contact with me and I will be visiting him next year. Thanks for all your support. :happydance::thumbsup:
 
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