My story: staff 2004-2011 at Jo'burg and Flag

mich

Patron
ls:biria

=

long story: but I read it all

WoW!

Sorry to hear that you were put through the ringer there but I am glad about one thing for you and that is that at the end of the story you and your husband appear to still be together.

On a bright side of things Scientology was not able to destroy your family.

I tip my hat to your husband for having the love to have stuck through this all with you.

Go give him a hug for me.

Okay wait, I don't mean give him a hug "for me".

What I mean is go give him a hug and tell him I said that you should give him a hug, a real big one.

Rd00

Thanks! And you are so right! He really is the hero in my life. No matter what I put him through he remains my friend first and foremost (and he's got a real cute butt). The thing that amazes me the most - he never even liked Scientology - thought some of it was logical, and rational, and even clever - but hated the Org and the environment, and wanted nothing to do with it. And yet, he supported my going to Flag, donated money when they told him to "do it for" me, and did anything else he could do to help me. Let's face it ... the guy deserves more than a hug - he should get a medal! To say that I love him just seems like an understatement, after all, I love chocolate too. There are no words...
 

mich

Patron
Thanks for your story, Mich!
Good account of how it goes for outer org trainees!
Hopefully, others will be inspored to run the other way!
Thanks for sharing the story of your childhood and family.
That must have been tough to tell. It was a heck of a lot
to survive but survive it you did! And now you've survived
the cult as well. I hope the next chapter of your life is filled
with peace, health, good friends and close family.
Glad you landed here!

Thanks, Arthur. And thanks for the encouragement to tell my tale. It's good to have a space to lay the baggage down....:biggrin:
 

mich

Patron
Thankyou so, so much...:thankyou:

One thing I would watch is any tendency to blame yourself, to bring it all back to you for not making right decisions and so on. Scientology reinforces that concept to a huge degree and makes finding the "lynch pin" of issues that much harder to find... as it can be easy to say "well if only I had done blah" or "I got sick to stop something happening" and miss the deeper ones (which in my experience tend to be about loving yourself). I'm sure you are aware of this, I'm commenting for others to read as well. :)

You have much courage. :thumbsup:

Thank you! You're right ... the whole introverting thing is it's own trap, but even as a toddler I was aware that I was aware. I knew when I was "playing" someone, and I knew when it was wrong, or just self-centred. But there are other times when I should've known, but honestly didn't. It took me a while to be able to tell the difference, and honestly so, and now I only kick myself for those times when I knew I was doing something wrong and did it anyway. Courage is a funny thing... it's not natural, you have to learn it. Fear is natural, courage is learning that fear won't kill you unless you let it - "there's nothing to fear except fear itself" - or my particular favourite from Herbert's Dune, "I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killler. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. "
 

mich

Patron
Oh Mich, my wonderful friend. God, I wish I could fly all the way to Africa to give you a big hug. But this will have to do for now... :bighug:

Needless to say, your story brought back a LOT of memories of what you and I endured at Flag, together and separately. I remember many of the events and situations you described.

And you folks reading it: she isn't exaggerating what it is like to be an OOT at Flag. There are some people who do manage to fly through and seem to have a good time there, but for many of us it was confusing, introverting, frustrating, infuriating, and just plain hard, with little decent exchange.

Thanks be to all the good forces in the universe that provided good friends to help us get through it! (And to loan each other their emeters as session spares during their auditing internships...)

Flowers for you, my sweet friend, for being so brave and telling us your story so beautifully.

:heartflower: :heartflower: :heartflower: :heartflower: :heartflower: :heartflower:

Thank you, my angel.... and many times you were just that to me - sometimes one who cared for me, and sometimes one I could care for. You kept me sane on those days when it was touch and go. A true angel <3 ...Okay no more soppy stuff - I'm supposed to be a tough cookie, damn it!
 

BunnySkull

Silver Meritorious Patron
I would just like to say I appreciate a post being written with thought beforehand and being posted all at one time!! I know some people on this board like stories dooled out in paragraphs at a time, over weeks, but it drives me freaking nuts. So thank you for posting the major part of your story at one go.

If the story is worth telling, like yours, it's worth taking the time to it properly, edit itand post as a whole. screw the tl;dr bullshit, that's for people with the attention span of fleas or for subjects that don't merit many words.

I actually found the posting of long stories as small posts over time at esmb really surprising and terribly frustrating. At other forums I've been a member at the practice was banned on grounds of reply & compliment grubbing - clogging up the thread with pages of posts consisting of repetitive praise and "can't wait till next update!" and popcorn eating smilies. (it ended up threads of 50 pages - being 10% story & relevant answers and 90% non-relevant posts) I do understand when a story is posted and people post questions which lead to more of the story - I appreciate a story being naturally fleshed out like that.

When I find interesting stories being posted paragraphs at a time I usually tend to just wait till they wrap up and then read them.
 

Miss Pert

Silver Meritorious Patron
A LITTLE HISTORY...

I will start with my birth into this lifetime, because I can see the links between events that led me to Scientology, and led me out again. I have no problem talking about my life, but I can't be sure my family feel the same, so forgive me if I don't use their names.

I was born on 22 March 1968, in Jo'burg hospital, South Africa, to a mother who fell pregnant at sweet sixteen (and she is still truly sweet) and couldn't confront the fact, until her belly was too big to ignore. My father accepted responsibility, and they married shortly before I arrived.

My Dad was a funny, smart, ambitious guy and the first few years of my life were filled with adventure and admiration. I was a fat little girl who struggled to crawl, but I am told I could talk in sentences by the time I was nine months old. My Dad showed me off a lot, so I had a strong sense of being important. We lived a good life, financially above average, but what did I know or care about money. I was loved, wanted, and spoilt – although my Dad was not one to be crossed. I did as I was told, and took advantage only when I knew I could get away with it.

When I was two my first brother arrived, and a year and a half later my second brother followed. He spent time in hospital with TB-meningitis, and it was considered a miracle that he survived.

My Dad was very involved with the Christian church: he played the organ at services, distributed Gideon Bibles, and as a member of "Youth for Christ" ministeries, helped arrange for Cliff Richard (pop-star in the 70's) to come to South Africa. He was also a pilot and flew for a sky-diving club.

One Easter Sunday, just after my sixth birthday, he flew his 'plane into the ground, and in the blink of an eye my whole life changed. There was suspicion of sabotage (I remember listening to a radio news broadcast about it), but I was too busy trying to get my head around what had happened to my life to worry about the grown-up details.

My father died without a will, or life insurance, and suddenly everything that belonged to us was ours no longer. My mother actually "stole" her bed when we moved from our home. I remember very little from that time – but two events stand out for me. One was a friendly "uncle" telling me that "God must have needed my Dad", the other that "it was up to me" to take care of my family, because I was the strong one.

We moved from place to place, struggling to find our way, depending on my mother's parents to keep us going. I learnt a lot about survival over the next three years ... how empty Coke bottles could be collected for the deposit to buy bread ... how to steal bread when my mother was so ill she couldn't even sit up, and my brothers and I had pink-eye and whooping cough ... how to make glue out of flour so I could do my homework ... how arriving at a school in the middle of the year, with the wrong uniform, could really single you out as a target ... how a bully could make you eat human faeces (I still remember the taste)...

All the while I kept silent about my suffering and just kept going, being the strong one. Then my mother met a man...

Now I have heard many Scientologists over the years talk about SP's, but I gotta tell you I never met any in the church. Sure I met a lot of people who dramatised SP behaviours, both in and out of the Church, but no true-blue SP's. You know how I can tell the difference? Because I've lived with the real-deal, someone who had every single one of the characteristics, every single moment of his life. He was not dramatising, or choosing the winning valence... he was the real thing.

He used my love of my family to control me, to turn me into his personal kiddie-whore, and then he beat them and abused them anyway. The lesson? When you do something bad for the sake of good, you lose. Everytime and without fail. I allowed him to sexually abuse me, to protect my family – that was the agreement – but when you make a deal with the devil......

Now, I know that we have all been led to believe that the ends justifies the means, that the greater good has overall importance. But I can tell you that no amount of wrongs make a right. I couldn't stop him when he started to hurt them. I tried. I would do whatever he asked, stretched further and further to please him. But the kind of man who would do that was not the kind of man who would keep his word.

Should anyone convince you to do anything you disagree with, you have to ask yourself, "If this small wrong is okay to them, how do I know they'll turn away from the bigger wrong?" Answer: they won't. Any small cruelty just leads to further cruelty. I know you know what I'm talking about – no matter where you come from or where you've been, or who you are – this is a universal truth. This experience got me into Scientology, and it also got me out ...but more about that later.

By the time I was twelve I was a mess. Once he destroyed us he let us go, and found a new family to "play with". I chose to go to boarding school for my high school years, as being around my family restimmed me, and me them, severely. The suffering never ended with him gone. We all took turns dramatising his valence, three kids that would explode violently, especially at each other. And as we grew older it got more dangerous.

My youngest brother had the least control. His violent outbursts were going to turn him into a murderer. His first victim would've been his own brother – but the gun misfired. The next time he used the gun, it was on himself, and as much as we loved him we all sighed with relief. My remaining brother and I turned to drugs and alcohol, and in my case, bouts of extreme promiscuity followed by long periods of solitude.

I knew there was something wrong with all of us, but there were no real solutions. My younger brother had psychiatric meds which led him to his suicide (he couldn't live with the fear of losing his temper, but he wasn't living at all when he was on his meds), my other brother just kept rollercoasting through his life ... but I got lucky. I met my husband.


I'm going to respond to this a section at a time so I can keep up with my thoughts.

Mich my girl, although we never discussed this at Flag, I always felt that life was hard for you as you grew up. I must admit I never imagined this, I do relate to your statement which I've made bold, I learnt this lesson many times in different ways. Fortunately I was only abused once but it still left a scar.

Here is my first big hug to you, I have a feeling I will be sending many. Mind you I would send them to you even without your story.

:bighug::bighug::bighug:
 

mich

Patron
I would just like to say I appreciate a post being written with thought beforehand and being posted all at one time!! I know some people on this board like stories dooled out in paragraphs at a time, over weeks, but it drives me freaking nuts. So thank you for posting the major part of your story at one go.

If the story is worth telling, like yours, it's worth taking the time to it properly, edit itand post as a whole. screw the tl;dr bullshit, that's for people with the attention span of fleas or for subjects that don't merit many words.

I actually found the posting of long stories as small posts over time at esmb really surprising and terribly frustrating. At other forums I've been a member at the practice was banned on grounds of reply & compliment grubbing - clogging up the thread with pages of posts consisting of repetitive praise and "can't wait till next update!" and popcorn eating smilies. (it ended up threads of 50 pages - being 10% story & relevant answers and 90% non-relevant posts) I do understand when a story is posted and people post questions which lead to more of the story - I appreciate a story being naturally fleshed out like that.

When I find interesting stories being posted paragraphs at a time I usually tend to just wait till they wrap up and then read them.

Thanks, bunny. I felt the same way... takes too long to go through all the comments when you just want to get on with it. :thumbsup:
 

mich

Patron
A LITTLE HISTORY...

I will start with my birth into this lifetime, because I can see the links between events that led me to Scientology, and led me out again. I have no problem talking about my life, but I can't be sure my family feel the same, so forgive me if I don't use their names.

I was born on 22 March 1968, in Jo'burg hospital, South Africa, to a mother who fell pregnant at sweet sixteen (and she is still truly sweet) and couldn't confront the fact, until her belly was too big to ignore. My father accepted responsibility, and they married shortly before I arrived.

My Dad was a funny, smart, ambitious guy and the first few years of my life were filled with adventure and admiration. I was a fat little girl who struggled to crawl, but I am told I could talk in sentences by the time I was nine months old. My Dad showed me off a lot, so I had a strong sense of being important. We lived a good life, financially above average, but what did I know or care about money. I was loved, wanted, and spoilt – although my Dad was not one to be crossed. I did as I was told, and took advantage only when I knew I could get away with it.

When I was two my first brother arrived, and a year and a half later my second brother followed. He spent time in hospital with TB-meningitis, and it was considered a miracle that he survived.

My Dad was very involved with the Christian church: he played the organ at services, distributed Gideon Bibles, and as a member of "Youth for Christ" ministeries, helped arrange for Cliff Richard (pop-star in the 70's) to come to South Africa. He was also a pilot and flew for a sky-diving club.

One Easter Sunday, just after my sixth birthday, he flew his 'plane into the ground, and in the blink of an eye my whole life changed. There was suspicion of sabotage (I remember listening to a radio news broadcast about it), but I was too busy trying to get my head around what had happened to my life to worry about the grown-up details.

My father died without a will, or life insurance, and suddenly everything that belonged to us was ours no longer. My mother actually "stole" her bed when we moved from our home. I remember very little from that time – but two events stand out for me. One was a friendly "uncle" telling me that "God must have needed my Dad", the other that "it was up to me" to take care of my family, because I was the strong one.

We moved from place to place, struggling to find our way, depending on my mother's parents to keep us going. I learnt a lot about survival over the next three years ... how empty Coke bottles could be collected for the deposit to buy bread ... how to steal bread when my mother was so ill she couldn't even sit up, and my brothers and I had pink-eye and whooping cough ... how to make glue out of flour so I could do my homework ... how arriving at a school in the middle of the year, with the wrong uniform, could really single you out as a target ... how a bully could make you eat human faeces (I still remember the taste)...

All the while I kept silent about my suffering and just kept going, being the strong one. Then my mother met a man...

Now I have heard many Scientologists over the years talk about SP's, but I gotta tell you I never met any in the church. Sure I met a lot of people who dramatised SP behaviours, both in and out of the Church, but no true-blue SP's. You know how I can tell the difference? Because I've lived with the real-deal, someone who had every single one of the characteristics, every single moment of his life. He was not dramatising, or choosing the winning valence... he was the real thing.

He used my love of my family to control me, to turn me into his personal kiddie-whore, and then he beat them and abused them anyway. The lesson? When you do something bad for the sake of good, you lose. Everytime and without fail. I allowed him to sexually abuse me, to protect my family – that was the agreement – but when you make a deal with the devil......

Now, I know that we have all been led to believe that the ends justifies the means, that the greater good has overall importance. But I can tell you that no amount of wrongs make a right. I couldn't stop him when he started to hurt them. I tried. I would do whatever he asked, stretched further and further to please him. But the kind of man who would do that was not the kind of man who would keep his word.

Should anyone convince you to do anything you disagree with, you have to ask yourself, "If this small wrong is okay to them, how do I know they'll turn away from the bigger wrong?" Answer: they won't. Any small cruelty just leads to further cruelty. I know you know what I'm talking about – no matter where you come from or where you've been, or who you are – this is a universal truth. This experience got me into Scientology, and it also got me out ...but more about that later.

By the time I was twelve I was a mess. Once he destroyed us he let us go, and found a new family to "play with". I chose to go to boarding school for my high school years, as being around my family restimmed me, and me them, severely. The suffering never ended with him gone. We all took turns dramatising his valence, three kids that would explode violently, especially at each other. And as we grew older it got more dangerous.

My youngest brother had the least control. His violent outbursts were going to turn him into a murderer. His first victim would've been his own brother – but the gun misfired. The next time he used the gun, it was on himself, and as much as we loved him we all sighed with relief. My remaining brother and I turned to drugs and alcohol, and in my case, bouts of extreme promiscuity followed by long periods of solitude.

I knew there was something wrong with all of us, but there were no real solutions. My younger brother had psychiatric meds which led him to his suicide (he couldn't live with the fear of losing his temper, but he wasn't living at all when he was on his meds), my other brother just kept rollercoasting through his life ... but I got lucky. I met my husband.


I'm going to respond to this a section at a time so I can keep up with my thoughts.

Mich my girl, although we never discussed this at Flag, I always felt that life was hard for you as you grew up. I must admit I never imagined this, I do relate to your statement which I've made bold, I learnt this lesson many times in different ways. Fortunately I was only abused once but it still left a scar.

Here is my first big hug to you, I have a feeling I will be sending many. Mind you I would send them to you even without your story.

:bighug::bighug::bighug:

Thanks, babe :bighug: back to you... I only hope this is a lesson I never forget again!
 

xseaorguk

Patron Meritorious
I think this is the first long story on here I have ever managed to start reading and just kept on reading to the end - was actually disappointed when it ended:yes:

My first thoughts are for some loved ones of mine still "in", who I would wish to read this, but know they are still not ready for such truth.
How tempted I feel to send a link to them, but know I must be patient and hope that one day they will be ready and search (as I did myself) for the truth.

I truly believe your story would make a good book or film even.

You have started off my day here in the UK with a lovely feeling that stories of the abuses within $cn are getting out to people all around the world, and this powerful truth will win in the end.

Wishing you also many hours of reading other stories and accounts on ESMB, as there is so much valuable data to take in.

Thank you....
 

vumba

Danielle Chamberlin
Eish Mich well done on surviving in the first place! Thank you for your story. I read every word. I see so much in your story that resonates with mine. I too grew up in Joburg, and was connected to Jobury Org. My step-father abused us mentally, and his sons physically and sexually. I too ended up at Flag and bore the brunt of pushing, pushing, pushing for completion and stats. I too went back the UK, then was called back to Flag and the immigration guys wouldn't me back in to be an Scn staff member, which was actually probably a good thing.

You have been through so much, and I really applaud you for your strength and courage. Well done. x
 

lurkanon

Patron with Honors
Thank you for the wonderful compliments! Yes - I do feel lighter and brighter!!

Sorry, Kyalami was one of those things that got left out when I realised my story was becoming a novel. We worked like demons, begged, borrowed and probably stole to raise half of what we needed, so the very generous DM could persuade the IAS to fund the other half.... and then we spent the next few years paying thousands of big bucks (my guess about $6500 per night) renting their hall for our events!! How'd ya like them apples? Good scam, huh? I went many a week without pay so we could afford those events... As far as I know the place belongs to us, but is still operating as a hotel....? Another one of those things no-one really wants to talk about, and when it comes up, we get told that the staff are at Flag at this very moment, in training, for our wonderful Advanced Org (I met one of them while I was at Flag - she's the Saint Hill SHSBC-Sup now)

You really duplicated the education (or rather, lack thereof) situation in South Africa. I wish you could watch the news here - there's some kind of student rioting or demonstrating almost every week. Poverty and illiteracy go hand-in-hand and create a catch 22 - you can't get out of one without handling the other, but at the same time one keeps the other in place. My plan was to push Dianetics, as most black South-Africans have experienced or been exposed to violence of some kind (and yes I really mean most - I've given enough Book1 sessions to know that very few people have not), and they respond really well to Dianetics, but alas no Book1 auditor on staff.

The other trainee from CT... Matt or Keith? Is he still in?

Thanks for the info on Kyalami, very much appreciated - I thought as much!

I cannot give too much info on a public forum, sorry, as I am "under the radar" for good reasons, but I totally duplicate the situation in South Africa, and how dire it is.

The other trainee - Matt, and still in.

Thanks again, you shine bright, and beautiful!!!! :thumbsup:

- LA
 

Disinfected

Patron Meritorious
I know what you mean, and at first it was confusing for me. I figure I owe my loyalty to those people and their moments of care and help (sometimes a person would help me the one day and hurt me the next), but I don't owe a system anything! I know ('cause I've been looking) that a lot of what Ron came up with was 'borrowed' from other people and systems, and I owe them and him thanks for that. But it was the support of those who really cared, that gave me the strength and belief that I could "come right", and I believe there's more room for improvement, and more people who can help. I'm just gonna be a little more careful about finding them....:thumbsup:

Mich, please understand that when I say I owe them some loyalty, I mean that I owe them the loyalty of being true to the good I found in Scientology and LRH in that I acknowledge that while openly acknowledging their faults and condemning their crimes. I do not mean I own the the "loyalty" of remaining in the group or being "the good Scientologist" if that means lining up behind LRH, David Miscavige, or any autocrat. As an analogy to some ex's, it's like when I see some divorced guy that has nothing, nothing good at all, to say about his ex-wife and the mother of his children and is happy to bad mouth her to a complete stranger. Come on!

disinfected
 

Kookaburra

Gold Meritorious Patron
Mich, thank-you so much for writing this story. I found it fascinating.
There is not much very recent information coming out of CoS, and even less from South Africa, so this was a real treat.

Your story really resonated with me. Even though you are much later on the chain than me, by about 20 years, I see the outcome of some of the ideas that were extant but not really dramatized to the max as they are now. It seems that when I was in, we had rough spots and pockets of insanity. Now it is one one continuous stream of lunacy, making it much harder for any halfway sane staff member to function at all. Kudos to you for sticking it out for as long as you did. :thumbsup:

I am glad to hear you are out and out with your family intact. Many are not so lucky these days. May your future be bright and you reap the rewards for all the hard work you have put in to help others. :hug:
 

Kutta

Silver Meritorious Patron
Thank you Mich for your story. i wish for your family, your mother, brother, husband, son, and yourself a happy and satisfying life. So much to look forward to now.

I hope you are able to get back to growing your own veges (I think I read earlier that you used to do that), and that your find your place in society where people know they will be valued and rewarded for their labours, enjoy weekends for leisure and family, annual paid holidays, paid sick leave, are not required to do the impossible or punished for not achieving that.

In other words, a happy life in the real, regular, beautiful world. You deserve it. Take care of yourself; others will benefit.
 

mich

Patron
I think this is the first long story on here I have ever managed to start reading and just kept on reading to the end - was actually disappointed when it ended:yes:

My first thoughts are for some loved ones of mine still "in", who I would wish to read this, but know they are still not ready for such truth.
How tempted I feel to send a link to them, but know I must be patient and hope that one day they will be ready and search (as I did myself) for the truth.

I truly believe your story would make a good book or film even.

You have started off my day here in the UK with a lovely feeling that stories of the abuses within $cn are getting out to people all around the world, and this powerful truth will win in the end.

Wishing you also many hours of reading other stories and accounts on ESMB, as there is so much valuable data to take in.

Thank you....

Thank you, xseaorguk. I know my story is a more 'average' experience, and many others have more powerful examples of the 'rot'. Still, I wanted to go on the record, because I believe that the sheer mass of bad experiences are enough to crush the monster, and I wanted to add my little piece. Also, I found it to be the best way for me to lay the baggage down, and move forward with a lighter step, and would highly recommend it to anyone who feels like they just can't let it go.
 

mich

Patron
Eish Mich well done on surviving in the first place! Thank you for your story. I read every word. I see so much in your story that resonates with mine. I too grew up in Joburg, and was connected to Jobury Org. My step-father abused us mentally, and his sons physically and sexually. I too ended up at Flag and bore the brunt of pushing, pushing, pushing for completion and stats. I too went back the UK, then was called back to Flag and the immigration guys wouldn't me back in to be an Scn staff member, which was actually probably a good thing.

You have been through so much, and I really applaud you for your strength and courage. Well done. x

Thanks, Vumba. I kinda guessed you'd been in SA - the name and the Afrikaans slang gave you away. I think you owe the embassy a big thank you - I know I do! If I'd gone back again, God only knows how much more trouble I would've landed
up in! :biggrin:

I may be wrong, but there seems to be a high incidence of that kind of abuse in SA - it's almost common. I hope I'm wrong, but I tend to be a good shoulder, and I've heard a lot of stories. I look forward to a world where it doesn't happen, and I'll keep looking for a way to help that world become our reality. Well done yourself for surviving with enough humanity to want to help.:thumbsup:
 

mich

Patron
Thanks for the info on Kyalami, very much appreciated - I thought as much!

I cannot give too much info on a public forum, sorry, as I am "under the radar" for good reasons, but I totally duplicate the situation in South Africa, and how dire it is.

The other trainee - Matt, and still in.

Thanks again, you shine bright, and beautiful!!!! :thumbsup:

- LA

Thanks, LA. Count on it!:biggrin:
 

mich

Patron
Mich, please understand that when I say I owe them some loyalty, I mean that I owe them the loyalty of being true to the good I found in Scientology and LRH in that I acknowledge that while openly acknowledging their faults and condemning their crimes. I do not mean I own the the "loyalty" of remaining in the group or being "the good Scientologist" if that means lining up behind LRH, David Miscavige, or any autocrat. As an analogy to some ex's, it's like when I see some divorced guy that has nothing, nothing good at all, to say about his ex-wife and the mother of his children and is happy to bad mouth her to a complete stranger. Come on!

disinfected

Absolutely! Sorry - I didn't mean to sound like I thought otherwise ... I was just voicing my agreement, and being more specific as to how I see it. I feel the same. I would be lost without what Scn did for me - no-one else had been able to help. I guess I'm just pissed at those who won't see that their behaviour is very un-scn. Most of the people I met were good, and wanted to spread that goodness. It's those that brought bad into it, especially when they claim it's for the good, that just get my goat! scn wasn't something LRH created, as much as he wished he was that influential. scn was created by good people, getting together to do more good, and it just sucks that some have managed to ruin it for the rest.
 

mich

Patron
Mich, thank-you so much for writing this story. I found it fascinating.
There is not much very recent information coming out of CoS, and even less from South Africa, so this was a real treat.

Your story really resonated with me. Even though you are much later on the chain than me, by about 20 years, I see the outcome of some of the ideas that were extant but not really dramatized to the max as they are now. It seems that when I was in, we had rough spots and pockets of insanity. Now it is one one continuous stream of lunacy, making it much harder for any halfway sane staff member to function at all. Kudos to you for sticking it out for as long as you did. :thumbsup:

I am glad to hear you are out and out with your family intact. Many are not so lucky these days. May your future be bright and you reap the rewards for all the hard work you have put in to help others. :hug:

Thanks, Kookaburra. It's the guys who were earlier on the chain like you that make it easier for guys like me when we do make it out! By the by, I love Ozzies - so much like my people, and they love a good joke, which is part of what kept me sane.

As for my family, don't ask me how they put up with me through all that, but they did. I am truly loved, and I don't take it for granted.

I'm looking for a new way to help... might just get into water conservation and fish-farming, as it combines my skills with my husband's, and I think he's ready to dump the rat-race. Watch this space...:biggrin:
 

mich

Patron
Thank you Mich for your story. i wish for your family, your mother, brother, husband, son, and yourself a happy and satisfying life. So much to look forward to now.

I hope you are able to get back to growing your own veges (I think I read earlier that you used to do that), and that your find your place in society where people know they will be valued and rewarded for their labours, enjoy weekends for leisure and family, annual paid holidays, paid sick leave, are not required to do the impossible or punished for not achieving that.

In other words, a happy life in the real, regular, beautiful world. You deserve it. Take care of yourself; others will benefit.

Thanks, Kutta! Got myself some tomatoes, butternut, peppers and chives in the garden as we speak. Got a problem keeping the animals away from my lettuce - they get chomped as soon as those baby green leaves see the sun, but I'm working on a solution.

I'll probably never have a "normal" life - it's just not in my nature - but I do have those wonderful weekends and holidays, and enjoy them wholeheartedly! I've dropped the slave-driving mentality (it did take a while), and have promised myself to only do what I love, for as long as I love it, and not a moment longer. Thanks for the wishes - I promise to use them well :coolwink:
 
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