Continuation
Okay, so now I'm at AOLA on KTL with a new twin.
My new twin is in his 60's, OT V and kind of deaf and refuses to wear a hearing aid, so he can't hear me most of the time and I have to repeat myself, but we're getting along okay together making turtle progress. Neither one of us are fast students.
One thing that happened while we were twinning together was that the demo kits suddenly disappeared from the KTL courseroom. We were using the demo kits everyday and suddenly they were gone. Why? Well, we were told by the sup that because the materials that described how the course was to be delivered didn't include instructions to use demo kits, that we could no longer use them.
After all the years of demo kits being a standard part of study tech, we are no longer allowed to use them?
I was upset.
What in the hell was going on here?
He and I both lived close to AOLA and neither one of us had a car, so when events came up we both rode the Scientology bus to the events. There was an event coming up and one day on course he asked me if I was going. I said yes and he said, do you want to go together. I said okay thinking he meant to ride the bus to the event together. When the time for the event came, we met at the bus and rode to the event together. Then when we got to the Shrine auditorium, since we were together, we sat together at the event. After the event when we were herded like cattle through the lobby and mooooved into the anex where the party was and the regging was going on, we went to the food table and got food and went and sat down at a table to eat. I wasn't paying much attention to him and I think I wandered off to see what was going on elsewhere.
The next day we came on course, he was livid. Apparently he thought we were on a date and I thought we were just riding on the bus to the Shrine together. I did not want to date him. He told me I was rude in that I didn't pay him enough attention at the event.
I told him I did not want to date him. He was my twin on course and that's all I wanted of him.
He started hanging around me and following me down the stairs after course and was becoming a pain.
I finally went to the guy in Qual and talked to him about it and asked him to please do something with this guy. I didn't want any 2D with him. And per the study bulletin he wasn't supposed to get emotionally involved with me as his twin. The guy in Qual pulled him in and spoke with him, then pulled me in and spoke with me. The guy in Qual said...."I understand how he feels...he's in love with you....just humor him".
This was supposed to be a courseroom, not a lonely hearts club. This really pissed me off. What kind of Qual is this? Then the guy in Qual pulled us both in together and read off the Acceptable Student Behavior bulletin to him, and I told him I didn't want any 2D with him. We go back on course. He's still bugging me, so the guy in Qual tells him he isn't allowed to communicate with me off course and during course time he is to do the course. He still couldn't get it, so one day when I walked out the front door of AOLA and he was sitting on the bench outside the door, I walked up to him and told him I didn't want to have a 2D with him during or after this course, that I just wanted him to be my twin on course. He got mad and told me...."If you're not going to marry me, I'm not going to be your twin".
Geesh! This was crazy, so I went back upstairs to the course sup and told her what was going on and she wrote it up and said she would split us up and get us both new twins, which she did. She got him a twin and left me without one for about a week. So here I was twinless again.
Then in walks my new twin.
She was the LRH Comm at LA Org. Her ex husband had left the SO, and she had a child, so she had to live off the base. We got along okay and were turtling our way slowly through 6C getting lost in word chains, but getting each other through them very slowly. She told me she was going to go OT 8 on KTL.
Okay. I was having some really nice wins on course and writing up 2 or 3 success stories everyday. I couldn't really put into words very well what I was experiencing so I don't think the sups could very well understand what my wins were, but I was loving this course. It was like candy to me. When I talked to other people on the course or who had also done KTL, I never found anyone who was having the kind of wins or degree of wins that I was having. I really loved KTL. I felt like I was getting something out of it that most other people weren't. I was also bound and determined to take my time and get everything out of it that I possibly could. I was there for my own gains, not the org's stats.
During this time I was also working with OSA on the Cult Awareness Network problem that the church seemed to be having. A bunch of us were flown back east to the CAN Convention and as a result of being there, there was a lawsuit filed against CAN and my name was on it and Scientology won the suit and CAN had to pay me and some other people money. Of course when the check came in, we had to endorse it over to the lawyers. I remember seeing this check flashed on a big screen, at an event at the Shrine, with my name on it. It really surprised me to see it there. I'm sorry to say that I didn't know any better or I would have never done that.
I remember one little guy from OSA who was there at the CAN convention back east who told me and several others that he had ridden up in the elevator and two goons from CAN had gotten in the elevator with him, one stood on each side of him and they were going to take him to the top floor and get rid of him.
He said when the elevator stopped and the door opened, he punched one of them, ducked and ran out the door. That guy he hit took a swing at him and hit the other guy instead and the OSA guy ran and got away from them. True? I don't know. It was a good story. Convinced us how evil CAN was.
CAN never would let any of us into their convention, so that's why they got sued. It also didn't ever let any of us hear any of the other side, so the only story we had was the one from OSA.
One night at the hotel, the fire alarm went off and we were staying on the 8th floor. I barely heard this noise....if I'd been asleep, I never would have heard it...the rooms were very sound proof, which could have been dangerous in a real fire. The whole hotel emptied out down the stairwells in their pajamas and we all waited around in the lobby to find out what was going on. Someone had pulled the fire alarm. OSA was blaming CAN for doing it. Who did it? :confused2: We never did find out who or why.
About a week or so after we got back from this trip to the CAN Convention, the OSA gal who was the I/C of our group was in a meeting at PAC. She was tired and put her head down on the table and went to sleep. She never woke up. She died right there supposedly of an aneurysm. I wondered if someone had done something to her at the convention, but I was told that her family had a history of aneurysms. She was young. This really bothered me.
The next CAN convention was in LA. This time we were allowed in some of their rooms for their convention, but not in others. I remember sitting there with another guy.....we were both Clear. A gal got up to speak who had been an auditor at CCLA, but had since left Scientology after finding out what was on OT III. She didn't have any hair because she had cancer and was on Chemo. I wondered if she had cancer because of her overts of leaving Scientology and speaking out against it or maybe from reading the OT III materials. I didn't notice that it didn't kill her to read those materials. When she started to talk about the OT III materials that she had read, both myself and this other guy put our hands over our ears so that we wouldn't hear something that might kill us. It's no wonder that a lot of Scientologists won't listen to critics.....those who haven't done the OT Levels are probably afraid they'll hear something that might kill them.
I remember Cynthia Kisser - she was one of the leaders in CAN and she was nasty like an evil witch. She also made me think that CAN was evil. She was awful.
I also remember one lady there who had done OT VII....Solo NOTS and I tried to talk to her to ask her why she quit Scientology or why she was doing this, but she wasn't willing to educate me on this. Nobody there was willing to talk to us.
One night at this convention they had a Shabbat service for the people there that were Jewish. They wouldn't let us in, so one of our guys was Jewish and he got himself an invite from one of the people who was at the CAN convention. I said I wanted to go too because I'd never been to a Shabbat service, so he took me and another lady who was with our group with him. The CAN people didn't like us being there , but I really enjoyed the service despite that. It was very nice.
One of the gals that was working with us at this convention was an OT 8 public. I remember she got sick at this convention and I wondered, since she had already done these levels, why was she getting sick and I wasn't? I also remember talking to her about my KTL. I was telling her about all my wins and what a wonderful time I was having on this course. She said that she did the KTL on the Freewinds and that she was pushed so hard and pressured to get through it quickly and she didn't get that much out of it. After listening to my wins, she said she was going to do it over again and take her time with it this time. It really makes me mad that the orgs are so into stats and making money instead of making an individual's gains the most important thing.
Okay, so back to my own KTL. Now that I have this new twin and things are going okay for me.....but my twin keeps having problems....can't get to course on time and all sorts of other stuff going on in her life. After a while, I went into the guy in Qual and I said....since she's having so many problems, is there any possibility that she didn't really EP her Clay Table Auditing? So, he went back and checked her folders and came back and put her back on Clay Table again and we did it over at LA Org, since that was her org and her C/S was over there.
When she was done with her Clay Table, and I looked at the EP, I got to thinking......I don't remember ever making that origination, so I asked the guy in Qual at AOLA, to check mine as well. That was kind of a dumb thing to do since I wasn't having any problems, myself except for having to continually go with my twin to ethics all the time while she got straightened out. The guy in Qual came back from looking over my folders and said he couldn't find that I'd made that origination, so he put me back on Clay Table as well.
This time, my clay replicas weren't real big. I did a few and then what started showing up in the clay were my problems and upsets with org terminals - ethics officers - in Scientology. I looked at this and decided that when I got done with KTL, maybe it would be a good idea to get the charge off of Scientology and all the crap I'd experienced in connection with Scientology. (A friend of mine did this recently when she got stuck on the Solo Course on study and said it helped her a lot to clean that stuff up.) Then the course sup called a break for lunch and we had to quit the session to go to lunch so they could lock up the courseroom over lunch time. I never could understand just stopping clay table in the middle of the session for lunch.
One didn't stop other kinds of auditing sessions for lunch in the middle of the session....to be resumed for the rest of the session after lunch. :confused2:
Welll, my twin/auditor didn't show up for roll call after lunch.
She comes sauntering in about 10 minutes late. Where have you been? I was cleaning LRH's Office. Okay, I was pissed now. I'd had enough of her crap, so I wrote a note to the C/S explaining that I'd had enough of this person's nonsense and could I please have a twin that wanted to do this course and would come to course on time and be a twin because this lady was too distracted with being the LRH Comm and taking care of her kid, etc., etc. to pay attention to doing this course. I just wanted someone who would be there for me as an auditor and to be my twin on this course. I didn't think that this was too much to ask for, since I was there for my twin.
We were both pulled off course. My twin was sent to Athena Cramming where she spent the next few months and when I later saw her, she said she really needed that, that it helped her out a lot.
Meanwhile, I was told that they were going to FES my folders.
They have to FES my folders because my twin can't get her act together? Oh, well. So I sat in the hallway, awaiting my fate.
To be continued.