since Tommy and his wife are children of friends, I am more than a little interested. What do you *think** is going on?
What would a friend, a real friend, say to Anne or Cindy? (this is not a rhetorical question)
I think maybe he is in "the hole" or at least on the RPF. As far as what to say to his family, if he really is on the RPF, that is tough.
I think you have to "tell them the truth in love" - sorry to drag the old Christian thing out again. Make them aware very gently babystep by babystep - because deep down they must be gutted about it, even if they toe the party line. And I think it's one of those things they have to realise themselves after being pointed in the right direction, like a talented teacher gets you to see things.
But who knows? Maybe his mother's celebrity saved him and he was fitness boarded out. Or maybe he's working on some different post that was deemed more suitable - kind of a demotion.