Sallydannce's Story

[sallydannce]

What a great thread.

The threads created by people telling their stories on this board are so much better than anything Hubbard every wrote, and it's not even close.

They are genuinely honest and come from the heart, which is some thing Hubbard knew absolutely nothing about.

This is probably one of the main reasons it is so difficult for some people to break free of Scientology,

Breaking free from Hubbard's Mind fuck requires being honest with yourself, painfully honest in fact.

It can be extremely difficult for some, if not most, since Scientology programs you to believe being honest will put your eternity at risk.

In fact it is the main tenet of Scientology .... only think and do what benefits Scientology

This requires disconnecting from reality, constantly lying to yourself, and constantly lying to everyone you come in contact with.

Once you can break though the facade of fear created by Hubbard and can freely tell your story, you realize just how small of a man Hubbard real was and how evil the cult he created really is.

Thank you for taking the time to read my thread.  I sincerely appreciate it.  

Yep. It takes some deep digging for sure!  The self-honestly is, at times, excruciating.  No more denial. No more lying to self.

My biggest “betrayer” was myself. I was so good at shifting “reality”, bending it to please others, to hide from my own dark spots and my own fears.  Letting others convince (manipulate) me into believing they held the answers to my freedom, my sense of myself. "You hearing me laughing at you yet Hubbard?"

Along the way of digging into my darkest self, facing all the pain and betrayal (and single-handedly contributing to some very profitable years for the tissue manufacturing industry), I have found a way to love myself for being that silly, for being that innocent, for being that God damn human!

Proudly, loudly, in your face, unashamedly mind-control free!  (yes I accept there may still be nasty barbed bits lurking deep within but I know how to deal to it!) Life ain't perfect but it is perfectly imperfect. Very very like me!

Is there a mountain I can go stand on to celebrate?    

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cA46ZNjrzeY

 

[Free Being Me]

I love your thread Sallydannce! Thank you for sharing your experiences, reading your words has taken me on a journey as though I saw it through your eyes. Your story has lead me to rethink my past and cult history, not to mention looking at core beliefs as tangible valuable inner qualities, such as love, compassion, and forgiveness. Thank you ever so much! I hope you dance freely everyday!

:dance2:​

The cult... getting outta that place:
[video=youtube;TpNWSW49IBM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpNWSW49IBM[/video]

 

[JustMe]

Glenda honey thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you have shared. What an amazing story you share and what a wonderful, wonderful loving heart you have. You are a beautiful person in every way and I feel you deeply in my heart right now.

You’ve told me before that I have helped you but I want you to know that it is you who have helped me so very much.


As you told your story I could see my own unfold in ways I had not yet inspected and it is greatly helping me in ways I can share with you privately if we Skype.


In May at her place, Nancy Many and I will be doing what will be a wonderful ceremony to help celebrate a sort of divine femininity, a sisterhood and the major changes in our lives as we put behind what was wrong in the past and cerebrate ourselves and where we are going to be more ourselves and to make a more beautiful future.


In doing so it will help me put behind me a life that I tried to live that was not my own. As a small part of the ceremony, while thinking of the element of “fire” representing“change”, I plan to burn a small picture of LRH as it was LRH and his scientology that most represented to me my having to try to be something I was not. The burning is not of hate, it is a symbol of the lies I am putting behind me. You have so beautifully covered those kind of lies in your story through many examples told right from your heart. I will be thinking of you when I do this and hoping that you too can put them fully behind you.

We are each of us wonderful people who have been hurt by an evil that was scientology but we are rising above it now as we discard the lies and regain ourselves..


I want you to know Glenda that you will be part of our ceremony as you and your beautiful heart represent everything we celebrate in a sisterhood where we love and are all joined at the heart. Glenda you have a Mother’s heart which makes you “Mother”in the best sense of the word.


Here is a link to one of the poems I wrote when my daughter was pregnant. It lists a few simple but beautiful lessons I have remembered because of having my daughter. I consider them lessons in love as seen through the eyes of motherhood. And I see these views in you so I wanted to share them with you.

http://www.witchvox.com/vn/vn_detail/dt_po.html?a=usnh&id=41491


Everything that is good contained in the above is in you right now Glenda. The world is a better place because you are in it. Families are and will be better off because you told your story.


Lastly Glenda, this is for you. I consider it a mother’s dream. With your love you and the love of others with the heart of Mother you will help make that “someday”happen……someday



[video=youtube;VqgqmCJP_iM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqgqmCJP_iM[/video]



I love you.

 

[sallydannce]

Glenda honey thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you have shared. What an amazing story you share and what a wonderful, wonderful loving heart you have. You are a beautiful person in every way and I feel you deeply in my heart right now.

You’ve told me before that I have helped you but I want you to know that it is you who have helped me so very much.


As you told your story I could see my own unfold in ways I had not yet inspected and it is greatly helping me in ways I can share with you privately if we Skype.


In May at her place, Nancy Many and I will be doing what will be a wonderful ceremony to help celebrate a sort of divine femininity, a sisterhood and the major changes in our lives as we put behind what was wrong in the past and cerebrate ourselves and where we are going to be more ourselves and to make a more beautiful future.


In doing so it will help me put behind me a life that I tried to live that was not my own. As a small part of the ceremony, while thinking of the element of “fire” representing“change”, I plan to burn a small picture of LRH as it was LRH and his scientology that most represented to me my having to try to be something I was not. The burning is not of hate, it is a symbol of the lies I am putting behind me. You have so beautifully covered those kind of lies in your story through many examples told right from your heart. I will be thinking of you when I do this and hoping that you too can put them fully behind you.

We are each of us wonderful people who have been hurt by an evil that was scientology but we are rising above it now as we discard the lies and regain ourselves..


I want you to know Glenda that you will be part of our ceremony as you and your beautiful heart represent everything we celebrate in a sisterhood where we love and are all joined at the heart. Glenda you have a Mother’s heart which makes you “Mother”in the best sense of the word.


Here is a link to one of the poems I wrote when my daughter was pregnant. It lists a few simple but beautiful lessons I have remembered because of having my daughter. I consider them lessons in love as seen through the eyes of motherhood. And I see these views in you so I wanted to share them with you.

http://www.witchvox.com/vn/vn_detail/dt_po.html?a=usnh&id=41491


Everything that is good contained in the above is in you right now Glenda. The world is a better place because you are in it. Families are and will be better off because you told your story.


Lastly Glenda, this is for you. I consider it a mother’s dream. With your love you and the love of others with the heart of Mother you will help make that “someday”happen……someday



[video=youtube;VqgqmCJP_iM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqgqmCJP_iM[/video]



I love you.

Wow! Just wow! Denise you have just moved me to the core and I'm sitting here with tears rolling down my face. They are not tears of sadness, they are tears of triumph and (possibly) wisdom and wonder and love and a sense of everything and everyone.

And I love you too!

I will write more later when my eye-glasses aren't full of this watery stuff.

 

[The_Fixer]

Glenda honey thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you have shared. What an amazing story you share and what a wonderful, wonderful loving heart you have. You are a beautiful person in every way and I feel you deeply in my heart right now.

You’ve told me before that I have helped you but I want you to know that it is you who have helped me so very much.


As you told your story I could see my own unfold in ways I had not yet inspected and it is greatly helping me in ways I can share with you privately if we Skype.


In May at her place, Nancy Many and I will be doing what will be a wonderful ceremony to help celebrate a sort of divine femininity, a sisterhood and the major changes in our lives as we put behind what was wrong in the past and cerebrate ourselves and where we are going to be more ourselves and to make a more beautiful future.


In doing so it will help me put behind me a life that I tried to live that was not my own. As a small part of the ceremony, while thinking of the element of “fire” representing“change”, I plan to burn a small picture of LRH as it was LRH and his scientology that most represented to me my having to try to be something I was not. The burning is not of hate, it is a symbol of the lies I am putting behind me. You have so beautifully covered those kind of lies in your story through many examples told right from your heart. I will be thinking of you when I do this and hoping that you too can put them fully behind you.

We are each of us wonderful people who have been hurt by an evil that was scientology but we are rising above it now as we discard the lies and regain ourselves..


I want you to know Glenda that you will be part of our ceremony as you and your beautiful heart represent everything we celebrate in a sisterhood where we love and are all joined at the heart. Glenda you have a Mother’s heart which makes you “Mother”in the best sense of the word.


Here is a link to one of the poems I wrote when my daughter was pregnant. It lists a few simple but beautiful lessons I have remembered because of having my daughter. I consider them lessons in love as seen through the eyes of motherhood. And I see these views in you so I wanted to share them with you.

http://www.witchvox.com/vn/vn_detail/dt_po.html?a=usnh&id=41491


Everything that is good contained in the above is in you right now Glenda. The world is a better place because you are in it. Families are and will be better off because you told your story.


Lastly Glenda, this is for you. I consider it a mother’s dream. With your love you and the love of others with the heart of Mother you will help make that “someday”happen……someday



[video=youtube;VqgqmCJP_iM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqgqmCJP_iM[/video]



I love you.

My God. That was a wonderful posting Denise. Go girl!

 

[Free Being Me]

to all the people posting on this thread.

 

[JustMe]

...........They are not tears of sadness, they are tears of triumph and (possibly) wisdom and wonder and love and a sense of everything and everyone..........

And once again that beautiful divine femininity in you shines through

 

[Lurker5]

Oh Girls, you got me crying with you. Bless you.

 

[freethinker]

I really hope you have found peace for yourself because you have provided it for many who might otherwise not have found it.

How's the present going?

 

[Abletu]

Ya, same here, same story, same phobias

What the church scientologists are practicing right now is real mind fucking.

I am different from most. I squeezed and squeezed until I got the few tidbits that work out of LRH's thousands and thousands of hours of verbal and written diarrhea.

When I use these basic facts life happens, freedom happens and good stuff happens.

1. the pre-clear is always the pilot in the session.

2. the auditor is only the navigator. the clearer and more precise and positively expressed the directions, the smoother the session.

3. in session requires a 2 way communication atmosphere is always present between auditor and pre-clear.

4. 8-C is about positive "command" altitude and attitude.

5. when delivering objective processing in a 2-WC atmosphere, the pre-OT is always in the pilot's seat.

6. The pre-clear/pre-OT is fully responsible for piloting their own life, the auditor is fully responsible for getting the pre-clear/pre-OT to the pre-known physical or mental objective, and ensuring the physical body is protected fully when the pre-clear is time travelling (dianetic auditing).

7. no-case-gain really means "no-auditor & no--2WC atmosphere" it is always the auditor and only the auditor that is f**king up.

8. The pre-clear pre-OT will only succeed when the auditor maintains and remains in their navigator role.

 

[The_Fixer]

Ya, same here, same story, same phobias

What the church scientologists are practicing right now is real mind fucking.

I am different from most. I squeezed and squeezed until I got the few tidbits that work out of LRH's thousands and thousands of hours of verbal and written diarrhea.

When I use these basic facts life happens, freedom happens and good stuff happens.

1. the pre-clear is always the pilot in the session.

2. the auditor is only the navigator. the clearer and more precise and positively expressed the directions, the smoother the session.

3. in session requires a 2 way communication atmosphere is always present between auditor and pre-clear.

4. 8-C is about positive "command" altitude and attitude.

5. when delivering objective processing in a 2-WC atmosphere, the pre-OT is always in the pilot's seat.

6. The pre-clear/pre-OT is fully responsible for piloting their own life, the auditor is fully responsible for getting the pre-clear/pre-OT to the pre-known physical or mental objective, and ensuring the physical body is protected fully when the pre-clear is time travelling (dianetic auditing).

7. no-case-gain really means "no-auditor & no--2WC atmosphere" it is always the auditor and only the auditor that is f**king up.

8. The pre-clear pre-OT will only succeed when the auditor maintains and remains in their navigator role.

^^^^Thank you for the lesson in Chinese.

What was that in English please? I am fluent in English and bad language.

Picked up a few crude phrases in Russian, Croatian, Maori and Samoan.

Chinese fucks me around a bit, though.

 

[sallydannce]

I really hope you have found peace for yourself because you have provided it for many who might otherwise not have found it.

How's the present going?

Yes I have found peace. God did I say that out-loud? Yes I did. I don't have the words to describe this deep inner sense of myself and my connection to all of life. Most days, I love myself with unconditional acceptance. There are days when storms blow in and I cling to the edges of life, wondering what the fuck to do, what to think. I do not seek perfection. Perfection will find me when it is ready.

I have explored what life means - to me. Life, death, misery, bliss, love, hate, agony, ecstasy - every nook and cranny I could poke into, I tried to go there. Perhaps this may be considered to be a type of self-indulgent madness...I do not care what others think. I have consulted wise people, medical people, masters, the arrogant, the ignorant, the cruel, the loving, and many others, and it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for, was deep within me. It has been a truly inspiring fascinating exploration.

The name "Sally Dannce" came about when I was so lost and listening to Lou Reed "Sally can't dance". I really felt, at that time, my heart could not dance, that I had lost my essence - that carefree buoyant light feeling which makes one want to get up and dance. I had so little joy and comprehension. In defiance of that, I threw away the "can't", threw in an extra "n" into "dance" ("dannce" sounded a little French and I have a bit of French blood) and began to share this story. I was so frightened, so full of fear, so broken.

As I have gathered up all that makes up this woman, re-defined myself, bit by bit, I have discovered a type of richness that stuns me. Resilience, capacity to suffer, capacity to suck the joy out of the simplest moments (I try to not take anything for granted for to be alive is all), a true love of others, a type of connection to life that words don't capture.

My life is way more spiritual than it ever was when I was in scientology. I have a very (private) spiritual life but I follow no pathway(s) of others. I am truly grateful for every moment, even the crappy ones.

I went to the abyss coming out of the mind-controlling cult of scientology. It was terrifying. I have sufficiently pieced together the "tricks" used to control human beings. I have found my peace resulting from that intense spiritual betrayal. I made it out! All the way home, to myself, to my heart.

Home!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vpc3lFR0AwY

 

[freethinker]

You really need to get published.

Yes I have found peace. God did I say that out-loud? Yes I did. I don't have the words to describe this deep inner sense of myself and my connection to all of life. Most days, I love myself with unconditional acceptance. There are days when storms blow in and I cling to the edges of life, wondering what the fuck to do, what to think. I do not seek perfection. Perfection will find me when it is ready.

I have explored what life means - to me. Life, death, misery, bliss, love, hate, agony, ecstasy - every nook and cranny I could poke into, I tried to go there. Perhaps this may be considered to be a type of self-indulgent madness...I do not care what others think. I have consulted wise people, medical people, masters, the arrogant, the ignorant, the cruel, the loving, and many others, and it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for, was deep within me. It has been a truly inspiring fascinating exploration.

The name "Sally Dannce" came about when I was so lost and listening to Lou Reed "Sally can't dance". I really felt, at that time, my heart could not dance, that I had lost my essence - that carefree buoyant light feeling which makes one want to get up and dance. I had so little joy and comprehension. In defiance of that, I threw away the "can't", threw in an extra "n" into "dance" ("dannce" sounded a little French and I have a bit of French blood) and began to share this story. I was so frightened, so full of fear, so broken.

As I have gathered up all that makes up this woman, re-defined myself, bit by bit, I have discovered a type of richness that stuns me. Resilience, capacity to suffer, capacity to suck the joy out of the simplest moments (I try to not take anything for granted for to be alive is all), a true love of others, a type of connection to life that words don't capture.

My life is way more spiritual than it ever was when I was in scientology. I have a very (private) spiritual life but I follow no pathway(s) of others. I am truly grateful for every moment, even the crappy ones.

I went to the abyss coming out of the mind-controlling cult of scientology. It was terrifying. I have sufficiently pieced together the "tricks" used to control human beings. I have found my peace resulting from that intense spiritual betrayal. I made it out! All the way home, to myself, to my heart.

Home!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vpc3lFR0AwY

 

[Abletu]

On 28 Jan 2013 I to connected with my inner self.

I am working my way out, happiness is possible, love is possible.

Thank you for sharing.

I sometimes wonder if Ron purposely created this abortion to bury the gold, the stuff that really works in so much pain no person in their right mind would be willing to go their again.

If this is true Ron did meet his hidden agenda. He himself hinted he had another agenda you know nothing of.

Strange, I worked the last 35 years to separate Hubbardism from actual scientology and dianetics.

I tried to create an other path an other way, he covered all the bases and buried in Scientology ethics a self-enforcing abortion-pain loop of suppressing imaginary people who instinctively fought against betterment. A thorough investigation over 35 years is, every person who rejected scientology was really rejecting Hubbardism.

After reading esmb posts and comments, the trend is clear, Hubbardism.

The scientology and dianectics I have use worked, worked every time. Every time I added Hubbardism I regretted it.

To me, your story expresses the effects of Hubbardism very clearly.

Thank you again.

 

[ChuckNorrisCutsMyLawn]

Yes I have found peace. God did I say that out-loud? Yes I did. I don't have the words to describe this deep inner sense of myself and my connection to all of life. Most days, I love myself with unconditional acceptance. There are days when storms blow in and I cling to the edges of life, wondering what the fuck to do, what to think. I do not seek perfection. Perfection will find me when it is ready.

I have explored what life means - to me. Life, death, misery, bliss, love, hate, agony, ecstasy - every nook and cranny I could poke into, I tried to go there. Perhaps this may be considered to be a type of self-indulgent madness...I do not care what others think. I have consulted wise people, medical people, masters, the arrogant, the ignorant, the cruel, the loving, and many others, and it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for, was deep within me. It has been a truly inspiring fascinating exploration.

The name "Sally Dannce" came about when I was so lost and listening to Lou Reed "Sally can't dance". I really felt, at that time, my heart could not dance, that I had lost my essence - that carefree buoyant light feeling which makes one want to get up and dance. I had so little joy and comprehension. In defiance of that, I threw away the "can't", threw in an extra "n" into "dance" ("dannce" sounded a little French and I have a bit of French blood) and began to share this story. I was so frightened, so full of fear, so broken.

As I have gathered up all that makes up this woman, re-defined myself, bit by bit, I have discovered a type of richness that stuns me. Resilience, capacity to suffer, capacity to suck the joy out of the simplest moments (I try to not take anything for granted for to be alive is all), a true love of others, a type of connection to life that words don't capture.

My life is way more spiritual than it ever was when I was in scientology. I have a very (private) spiritual life but I follow no pathway(s) of others. I am truly grateful for every moment, even the crappy ones.

I went to the abyss coming out of the mind-controlling cult of scientology. It was terrifying. I have sufficiently pieced together the "tricks" used to control human beings. I have found my peace resulting from that intense spiritual betrayal. I made it out! All the way home, to myself, to my heart.

Home!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vpc3lFR0AwY

I just finished surfing about an hours worth of Lou Reed and The velvet Underground on Youtube because of this post. I feel pretty good right now, thanks

 

[Free Being Me]

Yes I have found peace. God did I say that out-loud? Yes I did. I don't have the words to describe this deep inner sense of myself and my connection to all of life. Most days, I love myself with unconditional acceptance. There are days when storms blow in and I cling to the edges of life, wondering what the fuck to do, what to think. I do not seek perfection. Perfection will find me when it is ready.

I have explored what life means - to me. Life, death, misery, bliss, love, hate, agony, ecstasy - every nook and cranny I could poke into, I tried to go there. Perhaps this may be considered to be a type of self-indulgent madness...I do not care what others think. I have consulted wise people, medical people, masters, the arrogant, the ignorant, the cruel, the loving, and many others, and it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for, was deep within me. It has been a truly inspiring fascinating exploration.

The name "Sally Dannce" came about when I was so lost and listening to Lou Reed "Sally can't dance". I really felt, at that time, my heart could not dance, that I had lost my essence - that carefree buoyant light feeling which makes one want to get up and dance. I had so little joy and comprehension. In defiance of that, I threw away the "can't", threw in an extra "n" into "dance" ("dannce" sounded a little French and I have a bit of French blood) and began to share this story. I was so frightened, so full of fear, so broken.

As I have gathered up all that makes up this woman, re-defined myself, bit by bit, I have discovered a type of richness that stuns me. Resilience, capacity to suffer, capacity to suck the joy out of the simplest moments (I try to not take anything for granted for to be alive is all), a true love of others, a type of connection to life that words don't capture.

My life is way more spiritual than it ever was when I was in scientology. I have a very (private) spiritual life but I follow no pathway(s) of others. I am truly grateful for every moment, even the crappy ones.

I went to the abyss coming out of the mind-controlling cult of scientology. It was terrifying. I have sufficiently pieced together the "tricks" used to control human beings. I have found my peace resulting from that intense spiritual betrayal. I made it out! All the way home, to myself, to my heart.

Home!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vpc3lFR0AwY

Dannce Eternally!​

Truly inspiring Sallydannce! Shedding hubbard's psychological mind control scientology to claiming and a re-rediscovery of self. What a beautiful thread of cult recovery you have given ESMB. I'm so happy for you finding your own inner peace! A book of your journeys is definitely worthy of publication. Please remember I will ask for an autograph.

 

[JustMe]

Yes I have found peace. ........... I don't have the words to describe this deep inner sense of myself and my connection to all of life. Most days, I love myself with unconditional acceptance. ................ I do not seek perfection. Perfection will find me when it is ready.

I have explored what life means - to me. ........................... and it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for, was deep within me. It has been a truly inspiring fascinating exploration.
..................................

As I have gathered up all that makes up this woman, re-defined myself, bit by bit, I have discovered a type of richness that stuns me. Resilience, capacity to suffer, capacity to suck the joy out of the simplest moments (I try to not take anything for granted for to be alive is all), a true love of others, a type of connection to life that words don't capture.

My life is way more spiritual than it ever was when I was in scientology. I have a very (private) spiritual life but I follow no pathway(s) of others. I am truly grateful for every moment, even the crappy ones.

I went to the abyss coming out of the mind-controlling cult of scientology. It was terrifying. I have sufficiently pieced together the "tricks" used to control human beings. I have found my peace resulting from that intense spiritual betrayal. I made it out! All the way home, to myself, to my heart.

Home! .......................

Glenda that was truly beautiful in every way, everything you wrote above even though I quote just some of it.

I could not agree with you more

Without doubt your amazing journey and writings to show it will help many others greatly

QUOTE=sallydannce;793870] .....it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for,was deep within me.......................[/QUOTE]

Oh my, how true.

You have pretty much summed up my feelings and perspective on life and about the incredibly beauty that is in all of us if we are but able to find it.

Welcome home honey, to an inner peace.

 

[In present time]

Yes I have found peace. God did I say that out-loud? Yes I did. I don't have the words to describe this deep inner sense of myself and my connection to all of life. Most days, I love myself with unconditional acceptance. There are days when storms blow in and I cling to the edges of life, wondering what the fuck to do, what to think. I do not seek perfection. Perfection will find me when it is ready.

I have explored what life means - to me. Life, death, misery, bliss, love, hate, agony, ecstasy - every nook and cranny I could poke into, I tried to go there. Perhaps this may be considered to be a type of self-indulgent madness...I do not care what others think. I have consulted wise people, medical people, masters, the arrogant, the ignorant, the cruel, the loving, and many others, and it turns out all I ever desired, all I ever yearned for, was deep within me. It has been a truly inspiring fascinating exploration.

The name "Sally Dannce" came about when I was so lost and listening to Lou Reed "Sally can't dance". I really felt, at that time, my heart could not dance, that I had lost my essence - that carefree buoyant light feeling which makes one want to get up and dance. I had so little joy and comprehension. In defiance of that, I threw away the "can't", threw in an extra "n" into "dance" ("dannce" sounded a little French and I have a bit of French blood) and began to share this story. I was so frightened, so full of fear, so broken.

As I have gathered up all that makes up this woman, re-defined myself, bit by bit, I have discovered a type of richness that stuns me. Resilience, capacity to suffer, capacity to suck the joy out of the simplest moments (I try to not take anything for granted for to be alive is all), a true love of others, a type of connection to life that words don't capture.

My life is way more spiritual than it ever was when I was in scientology. I have a very (private) spiritual life but I follow no pathway(s) of others. I am truly grateful for every moment, even the crappy ones.

I went to the abyss coming out of the mind-controlling cult of scientology. It was terrifying. I have sufficiently pieced together the "tricks" used to control human beings. I have found my peace resulting from that intense spiritual betrayal. I made it out! All the way home, to myself, to my heart.

Home!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vpc3lFR0AwY

you are amazing Sally and an inspiration. You also helped me confront my inner coward, you helped me to see that my protective shell is a brick wall. But most of all I think you helped me get past one of my last vestiges of programming... That feeling real pain and writing it down just means you can't move on, or you are stuck in a dramatization, or you are not in pt or what the fuck ever. The cult LOVES artists, but does not understand what art is. Didnt his Ron-ness say it was the ability to communicate clearly? Yet, the only scn artists I ever saw we're doing the "this cult is GREAT" thing. What you have done here is real art; laid out a story that captures the light and dark of the human experience. Put a story forth that has made us see we are not alone. I will redefine art, although I do not own a religion: Real art is a cure for being lonely. Real art makes us clearly see the human condition and helps us admit that we are just one of "them"... IMO $cn. Is the opposite of art.

 

[The_Fixer]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvjrKySG2xI

Something about this video....

 

[Free Being Me]

[video=youtube;N_atFMCUJ1o]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_atFMCUJ1o[/video]

Alexander Ebert Truth (Song)
Lyrics:
Truth
"The truth is that I never shook my shadow
Every day it's trying to trick me into doing battle
Calling out "faker" only get me rattled
Want to pull me back behind the fence with the [cattle]
Building your [lenses]
Digging your trenches
Put me on the front line
Leave me with a dumb mind
With no defenses
But your defenses
If you can't stand to feel the pain then you are senseless

[Since] this
I've grown up some
Different kind of fighter
And when the darkness come let it inside you
Your darkness is shining
My darkness is shining
Have faith in myself
Truth

I've seen a million numbered doors on the horizon
Now which is the future you choosen before you gone dying.
I'll tell you 'bout a secret I've been underminding
Every little lie in this world come from dividing
Say you're my lover, say you're my homie,
Tilt my chin back slit my throat take a bath in my blood get to know me
All out of my secrets
All my enemies are turning into my teachers.
Because, lights blinding, no way dividing what's yours or mine when everything's shining
You darkness is shining my darkness is shining
Have faith in ourselves
Truth
Yes I'm only loving, only trying to only love
That's what I'm trying to do is only loving
Yes I'm only lonely loving feeling only loving
Till I'm feeling only loving
Ya say it ain't loving ain't loving my loving
But I'm only loving only loving only loving
Only loving the truth."