Snarky Slate review of "The Mummy"

Type4_PTS

Diamond Invictus SP
"The Mummy" got lots of bad reviews.

My favorite quote from the NY Times Review:

Long story short: An ancient evil has been unleashed upon the world. Its agent is a long-buried pharaoh’s daughter, Ahmanet (Sofia Boutella), who is covered with mysterious tattoos and convinced that Nick [Tom Cruise] is her secret lover, or the god of death, or both. She gets inside his head, which is awkward both because he’s kind of sweet on Jenny and because it’s such an empty place.

Review: ‘The Mummy,’ With Tom Cruise, Deserves a Quick Burial

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/07/movies/the-mummy-review-tom-cruise.html?_r=0
 

Type4_PTS

Diamond Invictus SP
Some other reviews:


IndieWire Review: ‘The Mummy’ Is The Worst Tom Cruise Movie Ever
http://www.indiewire.com/2017/06/th...tella-russell-crowe-dark-universe-1201838756/

The Mummy Movie Review: An Unimpressive Tom Cruise Stuck In A Poor Story
http://www.koimoi.com/reviews/the-m...nimpressive-tom-cruise-stuck-in-a-poor-story/

‘The Mummy’ Review: Tom Cruise Kicks Off Universal’s ‘Dark Universe’ With Epic Monstrosity
http://www.thewrap.com/the-mummy-review-tom-cruise-dark-universe-2017/

Those are just a small sample.
 

Jump

Operating teatime
Some other reviews:


IndieWire Review: ‘The Mummy’ Is The Worst Tom Cruise Movie Ever
http://www.indiewire.com/2017/06/th...tella-russell-crowe-dark-universe-1201838756/

The Mummy Movie Review: An Unimpressive Tom Cruise Stuck In A Poor Story
http://www.koimoi.com/reviews/the-m...nimpressive-tom-cruise-stuck-in-a-poor-story/

‘The Mummy’ Review: Tom Cruise Kicks Off Universal’s ‘Dark Universe’ With Epic Monstrosity
http://www.thewrap.com/the-mummy-review-tom-cruise-dark-universe-2017/

Those are just a small sample.


I see. So from that I can only deduce the movie is thriving and prospering.


:duh:
 

Type4_PTS

Diamond Invictus SP
I see. So from that I can only deduce the movie is thriving and prospering.


:duh:

Too early to tell as today is when it is officially released. But the early response as measured on Rotten Tomatoes doesn't look good. :no:

In the past two hours the movies score on Rotten Tomatoes has dropped from 28% down to 17%. :ohmy:

https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/the_mummy_2017/

Click to enlarge:
mummy.jpg

I'd say we'll have a much better of how it will perform at the box office 9 days from now (at the end of the second weekend). Even if it has a halfway decent opening weekend once the word gets out from those who go see it we'll see how much it falls off from there.
 
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TheOriginalBigBlue

Gold Meritorious Patron
So the 1st Jihadist, while shooting at Nick Morton, says to the 2nd Jihadist, “Hey, do you know how to tell a Scientologist from a fanatic?”

2nd Jihadist: “No, how?”

1st Jihadist: “A Scientologist is always right.”
 

Jump

Operating teatime
If it goes down any further in Rotten Tomatos there might be an uptick with people wanting to go and stare at the unfolding train wreck...
 

arcxcauseblows

Patron Meritorious
it's always hard watching movies with brainwashed scientologists, you just want to pop their little bubble

that comment about him playing the same character for 30 years is so right, he doesn't even really act it's just mr "i'm cool" over and over ad nausea

this interview explains a little about why he lets scientology/miscavige run his life and choose his wives, or more accurately help him ditch his "sp" wives so he can be a player

deep daddy issues and women issues and a big fat god complex, go to 6:50

https://youtu.be/O0uy8oiRSI8?t=6m45s

scientology would be more accurately called narcisistology

when he pauses he's got crazy eyes

i have a feeling his "prayers" were a lot like hubbards affirmations
 

TheOriginalBigBlue

Gold Meritorious Patron
I like this review making the Lestat association. Will Cruise do an older more complicated Lestat? One can only hope.

https://www.theguardian.com/film/2017/jun/07/the-mummy-review-tom-cruise

///
The Cruisemeister himself is left high and dry by plot lurches that trigger his boggle-eyed, WTF expression. In one scene, he is nude so we can see what undeniably great shape he’s in. The flabby, shapeless film itself doesn’t have his muscle-tone.
///
In the end, having encouraged us to cheer for Tom Cruise as an all-around hero, the film tries to have it both ways and confer upon him some of the sepulchral glamour of evil, and he almost has something Lestat-ish or vampiric about him. Yet the film really won’t make up its mind. It’s a ragbag of action scenes which needed to be bandaged more tightly.
 

Operating DB

Truman Show Dropout
I get the feeling Cruise is done. His heydays are over.

On another note my gaydar went off watching him in that 1984 interview.
 

Type4_PTS

Diamond Invictus SP
If it goes down any further in Rotten Tomatos there might be an uptick with people wanting to go and stare at the unfolding train wreck...

Rotten Tomatoes gives two scores, one from the "approved critics" and another from the "audience score".

Over the past 18 hours the critics score seemed to have gone back and forth between 17-18%.

Here's a couple excerpts from the comments made by critics:

Peter Travers - Rolling Stone:
"How meh is The Mummy? Let me count the ways. For all the digital desperation from overworked computers, this Tom Cruise reboot lands onscreen with a resounding thud. Epic Fail."

Colin Covert - Minneapolis Star Tribune:
At one point in "The Mummy", Tom Cruise is threatened with doom by a ghoul who warns him, "There are some fates worse than death."
Starring in a film like this is one of them.


The audience score is 45% (meaning 45% of those who voted gave the move 3 1/2 stars or greater out of 5) so a significant number of them did like the movie.

At the box office it's doing horrible here in the U.S. but doing excellent in China and Korea. It's opening in 60+ international markets this weekend so in the coming days and weeks we'll have a better idea.
http://variety.com/2017/film/news/mummy-box-office-wonder-woman-winning-weekend-1202459998/
 

Type4_PTS

Diamond Invictus SP
I get the feeling Cruise is done. His heydays are over.

On another note my gaydar went off watching him in that 1984 interview.

The budget for "The Mummy" was $125 million and it's expected to make $35-40 million it's opening weekend here in the U.S., after which it will in all likelihood drop off sharply.

It's got to do good in the international markets for it to make a profit for Universal, and it did get off to a good start in some of them. In China and Brazil it was the strongest opening ever for a Cruise movie.
 

Jump

Operating teatime
The budget for "The Mummy" was $125 million and it's expected to make $35-40 million it's opening weekend here in the U.S., after which it will in all likelihood drop off sharply.

It's got to do good in the international markets for it to make a profit for Universal, and it did get off to a good start in some of them. In China and Brazil it was the strongest opening ever for a Cruise movie.


I remember the marketing for the last Cruise movie here (whatever that was) it was saturation. Every bus, magazine, talk show and billboard shreaked Tom Cruise.

The Mummy movie? Crickets.


That budget must have been spent in Brazil and China.
 
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