Telepathic Sex?

[The Sloth]

Re: LOCATED!

Could you please just tell me what it says to do? I really don't feel like chasing down a lecture and listening to it right now.

Helena

There is quite a bit to distill from this lecture...it isn't just a single quote. If you can PM me an email addy, I will see what I can do...

Some further thoughts:

Apart from two verified occurrences of astral sex this LT, (co-exisistence of being, both during the time the body was 'asleep') there have been other instances that were unverifiable. They started around age 14 (puberty) and have continued to this day. Despite best efforts to locate the "other terminal", I am toying with the idea that these may be generated by spiritual entity from the "joiner" area of track to keep me interested in the "mortal state" through reminders of how good it can be.

I have experienced "Native State", and apart from the incredible bliss involved, it was kinda boring from an "immortal" perspective. No randomity. Pure ARC.
So the joiner mechanism was an early effort to inject randomity via control by aesthetics. Which then led to adventures of identification and mis-identification of others in quests to find the source of this 'garden of eden'. I am thinking this may be the phenomenon that was mentioned by Sarge in his last encounters with LRH. He had a being that "zapped" him, and wanted a meter rigged to zap them back. Not the way to go imho, as it is just further not-is-ness. One has to recognize the survival value of such a connection, and find the underlying earlier postulates that make one want to desire such situations and randomity.

Just some random thoughts...

 

[Helena Handbasket]

Re: LOCATED!

One thing about guys. We generally can't be "just friends" with a woman we are attracted to. We can suppress our desire to get in her pants, but the desire is there. If he's married, it may be best to stay away.

I've thought about that. If I choose to do that, it would be extremely hard.

My stomach muscles are tightening up even as I write this.

Helena

 

[The_Fixer]

Re: LOCATED!

I've thought about that. If I choose to do that, it would be extremely hard.

My stomach muscles are tightening up even as I write this.

Helena

Um, what would be extremely hard, Helena?

Fixer being a little shit, as usual.

 

[The_Fixer]

Re: LOCATED!

Well, I've done it. I've had someone do an investigation and it turns out he IS alive, and I have his addresses and phone numbers.

He is not single.

I'm beside myself wondering what to do next. If I could just forget all about him and move on, I would have done so a long time ago. Perhaps we could be "just friends".

And there's still that "visitation" -- I still wonder what that was all about.

Life doesn't get any more complicated than this.

Helena

Learn to let it go Helena.

Life isn't about going back to old stories. It only pulls you down further.

Whenever I went back to old things, it was never what it was as I thought it was then. Something within myself (as I guess would be typical of most) changed and the experience was disappointing.

He has moved on, made no contact and showed no interest by now. it would be a recipe for heartbreak for you if not him as well. You could put him in a very awkward position, inadvertently.

If you can't move on, you may need some help with that. It's all very sad and pulls at the heartstrings, but no good will come of pursuing it. For you, especially.

 

[Leland]

My heart goes out to you Helena. What ever you decide to do, I wish you the best.

 

[Helena Handbasket]

Re: LOCATED!

One thing about guys. We generally can't be "just friends" with a woman we are attracted to. We can suppress our desire to get in her pants, but the desire is there.

And the problem with that is? (Just joking; I know what you're saying.)

My life has suddenly become A LOT more complicated than it ever had been.

Helena

 

[DagwoodGum]

In the late 1980's I had a really hot blonde girlfriend that believed in a lot of various spiritual philosophies without being dogmatic or anything like that. She could pick up on what I was fantasizing about during sex and ask me "WHAT WERE YOU JUST THINKING ABOUT"??? And I would tell her or she would tell me what she picked up on and it was really uncanny how spot on she'd be. Generally she was the one doing the most fantasizing as she was really wild sexually and all the more so when she was blasted off on her IV cocaine. She was from Hemet and later became a prostitute that I saw working the Blvd. in San Diego when I was there on business. And she once even wanted to do my dog, she just had zero sexual filters. No I did NOT let her.
But the reason I bring it up is that I realized that when I would mock up that she was a hot Latina or hot Asian she knew I was having sex with someone else in my mind and not her. She felt left out of the sex as the intimacy was gone during my leave from reality. She was also bi and she said "every time you're visualizing another woman I'm seeing images of hot women and it kicks my longing for a woman in. "Makes me wonder if that's where my initial desires to be with a woman came from". Made me wonder too if that's how it happens. Or conversely if she was fantasizing about a dude, wouldn't I then pick up confusing imagery and feelings of sex with a dude that could confuse my orientation? I mean if there's ever a moment that we would key out on a psychic level of telepathy it would be during sex even if we are out in fantasy land during. I could also see that whatever you like to fantasize during masturbation, nothing at all wrong with it by the way, trains your body to want that as the imagery and feelings you've mocked up trains the body to want that as it all becomes associated with the orgasms by the body. Ever since I've been more careful about what I fantasize about not just in sex but in my over all life as I need to be cognizant of what I'm mocking up for myself and my lover before fantasy attempts to become a reality that I'm unprepared for! Has there been any studies about related phenomena?

 

[DeeAnna]

What an absolutely amusing, amazing thread. It has everything - sadness, pathos, romance, jokes, heart-rending, touching emotions, friendship, support, advice, inquisitiveness, candidness - and perhaps best of all, a few other Gone With The Wind junkies!

One of the few books I've ever read numerous times. About once every ten years, ever since I was 14. Oh, and I watch the movie every time it is broadcast that I catch it. Plus, my sister and I quote dialogue to each other.

As in: "But I don' know nuthin' 'bout birthin' babies, Ms. Sca-lett!!" spoken by Prissy to Scarlett when Melanie goes into labor with Scarlett and Prisssy the only ones at the house.

____________

Helena, if you should decide to call or write to the old boyfriend (I'd write, but that's just me. After 25 years, I think a letter could be digested more easily that an unexpected phone call out of the blue. And phone calls can often come at a wrong time. A letter can be set aside and read in privacy later.) All you need to do is to ask and answer the question "What's the best and what's the worst that could happen?" Consider all the possible answers to that question and then proceed from there.

Some possibilities:

1.) Nothing happens. The letter could get lost in the mail. Or his current wife/partner could get it before he does and dispose of it without him ever seeing it. Or he could receive it, read it, laugh at it and throw it in the trash, having decided not to respond to it.

2.) He writes back or even phones you, as a courtesy. But does not want to become involved in any way.

3.) He reads the letter, calls you immediately and says the relationship he's in stinks and he was wanting to get out of it anyway. He wants to get togethr as soon as possible.

4.) His wife or partner gets the letter and reads it. Turns out she is a jealous maniac who has suspected for some time now that he is cheating on her. She has vowed to him that if she ever finds out he's seeing another woman she will hunt her down and murder her! (Perhaps a fake return address would be in order?)


You will surely think of even more scenarios.

 

[JustSheila]

Re: LOCATED!

Learn to let it go Helena.

Life isn't about going back to old stories. It only pulls you down further.

Whenever I went back to old things, it was never what it was as I thought it was then. Something within myself (as I guess would be typical of most) changed and the experience was disappointing.

He has moved on, made no contact and showed no interest by now. it would be a recipe for heartbreak for you if not him as well. You could put him in a very awkward position, inadvertently.

If you can't move on, you may need some help with that. It's all very sad and pulls at the heartstrings, but no good will come of pursuing it. For you, especially.

This is wise advice, from one who is a true friend to you, Helena.

I've experienced what he's saying. People change. Going back to old boyfriends has nearly always been a disaster for me. When it's not, the initial attraction (on my end) just disappeared when I met the older, different version.

People can be far more wonderful in our minds than in reality. At least for me, that was true of old boyfriends. Since then, I leave the sweet memories intact. The experiences were perfect just the way they were.

If you need to see him again to move on, then do it. Bottom line is, it's your life, your choice. You do what you need to feel good about the past and move on.

Wishing you all good things in life,

Sheila

 

[Helena Handbasket]

What an absolutely amusing, amazing thread. It has everything - sadness, pathos, romance, jokes, heart-rending, touching emotions, friendship, support, advice, inquisitiveness, candidness - and perhaps best of all, a few other Gone With The Wind junkies!

One of the few books I've ever read numerous times. About once every ten years, ever since I was 14. Oh, and I watch the movie every time it is broadcast that I catch it. Plus, my sister and I quote dialogue to each other.

As in: "But I don' know nuthin' 'bout birthin' babies, Ms. Sca-lett!!" spoken by Prissy to Scarlett when Melanie goes into labor with Scarlett and Prisssy the only ones at the house.

____________

Helena, if you should decide to call or write to the old boyfriend (I'd write, but that's just me. After 25 years, I think a letter could be digested more easily that an unexpected phone call out of the blue. And phone calls can often come at a wrong time. A letter can be set aside and read in privacy later.) All you need to do is to ask and answer the question "What's the best and what's the worst that could happen?" Consider all the possible answers to that question and then proceed from there.

Some possibilities:

1.) Nothing happens. The letter could get lost in the mail. Or his current wife/partner could get it before he does and dispose of it without him ever seeing it. Or he could receive it, read it, laugh at it and throw it in the trash, having decided not to respond to it.

2.) He writes back or even phones you, as a courtesy. But does not want to become involved in any way.

3.) He reads the letter, calls you immediately and says the relationship he's in stinks and he was wanting to get out of it anyway. He wants to get togethr as soon as possible.

4.) His wife or partner gets the letter and reads it. Turns out she is a jealous maniac who has suspected for some time now that he is cheating on her. She has vowed to him that if she ever finds out he's seeing another woman she will hunt her down and murder her! (Perhaps a fake return address would be in order?)


You will surely think of even more scenarios.

DeeAnna, you are totally clairvoyant. I did consider the possibilities, and wrote them up. I reproduce them here:

Well, I've decided. I'm going to write him an innocent sounding hi-how-are-you-let's-get-caught-up type letter. I've yet to compose it, but here are four potential responses I may get back, in order from the most to the least optimistic:

(1) I'm glad you wrote. The truth is, things have not been going too well here lately, and I've been thinking of you. If you ever get to ******* or ******, I'd like to see you again.

(2) Nice to you to write me. Yes, I would like to exchange letters with you and stay caught up. Here's what's been happening with me lately ... .

(3) I have a stable life and responsibilities now, and under the circumstances, I think we shouldn't be in contact any more. Whatever we had is OVER.

(4) HOW DARE YOU!! It's a good thing I intercepted this letter before he saw it. I'm monitoring his mail, his e-mail, and the phone, and I guarantee he will never see anything you write. You leave me and my family ALONE.

I rejoice in the fact that he's still alive, but no one lives forever. If I do nothing at all he WILL die, then I will never know.

It's a dangerous game I'm playing, but I can't help myself. A girl has feelings.

And JustSheila, I didn't read your post ^ but I'm sure you said something absolutely unkind and unhelpful (I'm keeping you on ignore).

Helena

 

[Helena Handbasket]

Re: LOCATED!

Learn to let it go Helena.

Life isn't about going back to old stories. It only pulls you down further.

I've tried for decades to forget him, my only accomplishment being denial.

Whenever I went back to old things, it was never what it was as I thought it was then. Something within myself (as I guess would be typical of most) changed and the experience was disappointing.

Who knows? He may have changed so much that I'd no longer be interested. That would actually be welcome.

He has moved on, made no contact and showed no interest by now. it would be a recipe for heartbreak for you if not him as well. You could put him in a very awkward position, inadvertently.

By that logic, I shouldn't contact him because he hasn't contacted me and he shouldn't contact me because I haven't contacted him. Besides, with all my moving around (I'm really good at running away) I'm probably very difficult to find.

If you can't move on, you may need some help with that. It's all very sad and pulls at the heartstrings, but no good will come of pursuing it. For you, especially.

I've had YEARS of therapy, both in and out of the Church/Freezone. I have very little hope left that I can be simply "cured" like that.

At the very least I'd like to run into him again in the next lifetime.

Helena

 

[Helena Handbasket]

SENT THE LETTER

Well, I did it. I sent the letter. I kept it very "3D", trying hard to conceal how I really feel about him.

This has a good chance of ending in disaster, but you never know.

I expect the usual trolls to trash me. Whatever defamatory nouns or adjectives they come up with, they're right.

At least I'm out of denial. It's debatable whether or not I was better off before or now.

Soon it will be ONE YEAR since the telepathic "visitation" that started all of this.

Helena

 

[Helena Handbasket]

NO REPLY

I've avoided posting on this thread until I had some definite new news. That time has come.

It's been ONE YEAR since the telepathic "visitation" that started all this and FOUR WEEKS since I sent the letter. There was no reply to the letter, and now doubt there will ever be one.

This project has failed, and it's time for me to put it on a back burner and forget about getting in contact with him again. But I cannot forget him. Without him, life holds very little interest for me -- I'm just going through life's motions, wasting away.

It's surprising that an Aspie like me, who grew up seemingly without emotions, should suddenly be so passionate about a man who wants nothing to do with me. Or is it? I've lost him before (whole track), under tragic circumstances, and the pain of losing him has made me retreat into a world free from the vagaries of human emotion. Perhaps that's where Asperger's Syndrome comes from in the first place.

I will always love him, even if I get nothing back, except perhaps in my fantasies. I expect to pine for him for until the day I die.

Helena

 

[JustSheila]

^^^

Good post, Helena.

You have plenty of heart. It shows in that last post - it was straight from the heart. Thanks for being unafraid to be yourself, to say what you really feel. I wish you the best.

 

[Helena Handbasket]

HELENA'S MIDNIGHT CONFESSION

It's midnight here in this time zone and high time for me to make another post to this thread, which will be winding down soon. I call it:

HELENA'S MIDNIGHT CONFESSION

It was a month ago now that I wrote him the letter and there has no reply. He wouldn't even give me the courtesy of writing me to say don't contact him any more.

The "telepathic sex" occurance that started this thread was a sign, I thought, that perhaps he wanted to find me too. But I can see now I was mistaken.

At least I have a (very) small amount of closure on the matter -- he doesn't want to get in touch at all.

On another forum, where I have spoken about this extensively, they were all rah-rah and we support you until I told them I actually wrote and mailed the letter. Then they turned on me, saying I was making "bad choices" and asking me to leave the forum. They did everything except quote the Ten Commandments at me.

For countless years, women (and maybe a few men, for all I know) have asked themselves this question: is it better to be with someone you love (more than they love you) or with someone who loves you (more than you love them). I believe I now have the answer to that question. The first is definitely better, but it's more difficult to accomplish. If you're strong and lucky enough, go for it. But for those who don't have what it takes to obtain the first, the second is more likely to actually happen. In my case, perhaps it's time I stopped aiming for the best possible outcome (the first) and just try to find someone who'll do (the second). But I'm not really looking forward to that.

There will always be a "hole in my soul" waiting in vain for the man I love to fill it.

A hug and some cake for someone who explains to the others the hidden pop music reference.

Helena

 

[Two Cents]

Oh, Helena. To me, love is always good. No matter the outcome, you were brave and just felt it.
It is good to love, even better to love and be loved in return.
You can let go of that person, if you need to, and still feel all the love you have for them, if you want to.
I know it's really difficult sometimes, but, take heart and keep going, okay?
The whole world needs love, and you obviously have some to give.
And receive.
Love,
Two Cents

 

[Sidney18511]

Helena..you might find this book interesting. It's by Robert Monroe and containes the experiences he had while "out of his body" and he describes some some of his sexual adventures. I thought about your situation when I found it and wanted to pass it on to you.

As far a your contact with your former love, give it more time. As long as you kept it light and conveyed that you just happened to think about him while strolling down memory lane you might still hear from him. You don't know his situation. He or someone in his family could be ill or he might of been out of the country or maybe he just needs some time to think of what he wants to say.

if I was you I would give it one more shot, a holiday or some other special occasion card would be good. What do you have to lose?

http://www.ghostcircle.com/ebooks/Robert Monroe - Journeys Out Of The Body.pdf

 

[Helena Handbasket]

Well, it's happened. The other online support group, the one that opposed the idea of my writing and sending the letter, has finally banned me.

I basically told them I was right to send the letter, and any one of them would give a toe or a tooth for a letter back from their "dearly departed" and they know it. The mods took exception to that. Apparently, they are all "good Christians" who feel that any action that might disrupt his marriage is to be strictly avoided. (Not will, just might.) I clearly stated, time and time again, that I was not wanting to do anything to hurt anybody but apparently the remote possibility of that happening was more important than any peace or closure I was seeking on the matter.
Oh, and I saw my shrink recently (from C of S: ) and she basically agreed with everything I said.

I predict that someday he and I will get back together, we will enjoy each other's company, and we will be happy. But I also predict that will not be in this lifetime.

Helena

 

[The Sloth]

[video=youtube;2kJj_L8zzZE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2kJj_L8zzZE[/video]


Needs no explanation..

 

[Helena Handbasket]

Right you are, Sloth.

"In my midnight confessions, when I tell all the world that I love you
In my midnight confessions, when I say all the things that I want to
- - - - - - - - I love you!
There's a little gold ring you wear on your hand
That makes me understand, there's another before me
You'll never be mine, I'm wasting my time"

I'm thinking that maybe the end of the story has been reached. I will always love him, and he will always ignore me. And this is the way it has to be until the day I die.

Helena, just what are we going to do with her?