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The Conditions

Clay Pigeon

Gold Meritorious Patron
It was about ten PM and I'd finished the admin and returned the folders to Tech Services after a day's auditing in our bedroom. Ive never had the time and wherewithal to be a voracious reader and as you all know this is even more so for a staff member but I was in a mood for reaing. We had a bookcase with many things piled on it including maybe twentyfive non scientology books and half a dozen of Ron's works including a fresh SOS and an old worn first edition DMSMH. I looked them over and it was all books I'd read, most of them prior to joining staff except...

Hmmm...

What's this?

A paperback titled "Inside Scientology" by Kaufman. Pukey yellow orange cover with note "40 Million Scientologists are forbidden to read this book" Forty million Scientologists? I don't see 40 million Scientologists.

Kathie was getting ready for bed and I asked if she knew anything about the book. She asked if recalled a young woman named Robin with bobbed dirty blond hair who had been on staff about three months and had split six weeks back. I said I did and she said she and some other staff had picked through the things she left behind and she had grabbed the book and our bedside AM/FM clock/radio.

I sat back and began to read...



:cake2::popcorn: anyone?

I read a few pages that night and a few more the next. After I brought my morning PC to the examiner the Qual Sec, the charismatic, fierce, dynamic and abrasive Bobby Wisner CLVI, OTVII, one of a half dozen superstars of perhaps the most upstat CLIV org ever stopped me at the bottom of the stairs to the HGC just inside the front door of the 1812 building. "i'd like to take a look at that book you're reading," he said. "Sure," I said and trotted up the block to our apartment then back down to the org and handed it over. This was a few years before Star Wars hit but one can get the image of him drawing a light sabre and raising a glowing goldenrod blade vertical calling me to attention as if I were a recruit and he a Parris Island D.I. "I'm assigning you a condition of Liability" he said...



:scnsucks::ripped::strike::notworking::scnsucks::itstrue::scnsucks::readrules::strike::readfaq::scnsucks:
 

Clay Pigeon

Gold Meritorious Patron
Wiz marched me down the back stairs to HCO. I protested, citing the First Amendment. No response. I rephrased my objection and repeated it. Again no response.

One thing anyone who wishes to have even a modest understanding of this entity, known by most as "Bird", caught within the thrael of mortal existence is I am jam up and jelly tight with The Constitution of The United States of America most particularly The Preamble and The Bill of Rights. I fell in love with it on sight when I studied it in Fifth Grade and have not blinked since. Moreover, when I took one step forward at the Manchester N.H. Induction Center 16:05 EDT 26 Jun 68, I swore an oath to "...protect and defend The Constitution of The United States of America against all enemies foreign and domestic..."

Furthermore...

(to be continued)
 

phenomanon

Canyon
There was this new thing . They called kit The Past Ethics Repair.
I had delivered several of them in ASHO's HGC when AOLA's MAA, Gary Jabobs, said to me "Have you ever been assigned an ethics condition that you didn't work out of?"
I said No.
Gary said O You must have !
Game on.(fooking EO trying to fooking audit me!)
So I said well OK, one time Alan Walter assigned me the condition of no condition, and I never worked out of it because I never knew the Formula.
So Gary sends me off to find the formula for the condition of no condition.
I went over to the Archives and spent a day or two reading policies, but I couldn't find anything so , I went over to ASHO's EO , who was an old timer) and asked about the formula, but she had never heard of the condition.
I went to Peter Gillham, a dear friend and colleague, and asked him about the condition, and the formula for it. Peter didn't know.
So I went to my old Bud, John Sanborn, and asked John about it. John said that Yes, he knew of the condition. He said that he knew the formula.
I said O Wow! What is the formula/
John said The formula is kiss L Ron Hubbard's ass!
I went back to the AO and told MAA Gary that I knew the formula! Gary said Great What is the formula?
I said the formula is Kiss L Ron Hubbard's ass!
Gary was not amused.
That's when he asked me to help him out with the little problem they were having with a psychotic break in the HGC.

another story.

I do not type. Tonight I can't be bothered with quotation marks, and punctuation and proper caps etc etc etc. I'm tired.
Mea Culpa.:notworthy:
 

NoIdea

Patron with Honors
The lower conditions were brilliant. You've got a staff member who is given impossible quotas to make week after week - selling things that nobody really wants, hiring people to jobs with no pay at 80+ hours per week, getting people to take time off of work to come in and complete courses and auditing and then spend thousands of dollars to buy more of the same.

Naturally, most of them fail to meet their quotas most of the time. And they are told that this is their fault. That's only going to last so long. They get beaten down and continue to fail and feel bad and worse and worse and eventually they're going to give up and leave. That's not maintainable.

But now, you assign the person a lower condition. They sit in a room and admit to being a confused, treasonous, and enemy. They do the doubt formula and say, "Yes! I can make it go right!" The do an all-nighter or two painting some walls or cleaning up some old filing or something. They suffer, but they are getting back in good graces! Everyone signs their liability formula and they are back on the team. They are fresh! They are rejuvinated! they do their non-existence formula and they're all gung ho for a week or two.

Notice that through this entire period, they still have not improved their stats or made any quotas. They may have even been taken off post while they complete the formulas, or sent to the local CLO to do the conditions. Nothing has actually improved except their outlook. They're good for another month or two or three. Their stats probably won't do any better long range, but they're really trying hard for a while, so they might bump up a little bit. And when they go back down again for too long, another round of conditions.

Brilliant.
 

F.Bullbait

Oh, a wise guy,eh?
The Condition of Nonsense (from Ethics for Regs)

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Clay Pigeon

Gold Meritorious Patron
I clearly recall the day the HCOPL "cancelling" Fair Game was issued. The 21st of October 1968 was my nineteenth birthday; the Monday that began our eighth and final week of Armor Recon training at Fort Knox. We "dropped our cocks and grabbed our socks" and fell out for reveille in the pre-dawn bluegrass light of Kentucky.The Field First, an SFC called us to attention and announced he'd just seen a blanket order in the CP. The three quarters of us who had not yet received individual orders would all get orders for Viet Nam. I proceeded to have an intense spiritual experience. I do not believe I was the lone ranger in that regard.

Two days later we were on break from a class. I was puffing on a Marlboro at the rear of the formation and I heard our buck sergeant say "...and Birdwood too." I said "And Birdwood too what?" He said "You're going to Korea." Well I can't begin to tell you how disappointed I was. Two other young troopers were also ticketed for duty in "The Land of the Morning Calm", my buddy Carlucci and some kid from Guam, both of them seventeen years of age and it was the rule one must be eighteen to be ordered into harm's way.

After two weeks leave we flew Ft. Lewis to Yakota and a great view of The Sacred Mountain, Fujiama and picked up a pair of scooters for escort into Kimpo whose landing strips were tipped with pairs of quad 50's with gunners in place. All the comforts of home. We were sent up to Tongduchon and the bayonet bereaucrats punched our papers for Un-Chon-Ni, Camp Kaiser home to the van for Seventh Division; two battalions of mechanized infantry and a squadron of armored cavalry; 2d of the 10th, "Buffalo Soldiers"

Yes I digress...

But the sideroad impinges on and against a light sabre with a goldenrod blade in the bilgewater bottom of FCDC

To be continued...
 
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