The last time I disseminated or proselytized

Voltaire's Child

Fool on the Hill
I have been allergic to proselytizing (or "dissem") for years. I hated it. After doing the "everyone must believe in God because I believe in God" thing when I was in high school, I got as far away fro proselytizing as possible.

Unfortunately, that's right around the time I got more into Scn. And in Scn, they expect you to proselytize. For a very brief time when I was 18 or so, I was telling people about it. But then, again, as I realized in my sr year of high school, I saw this wasn't going to fly. After that, the only time I ever did it was when the mission where I was on staff FORCED me to sell books and I flat out hated every minute.

I've worked with evangelical types. I've had to drive behind people with little pictures of fetus footprints on their cars. I don't like any of it. I've been allergic to it since long before I even heard of computers, let alone had one and was posting to the internet.

I remember saying to a staff member who was suggesting I mention Scn to people I worked with "Are you kidding? I have to work with these people!"

Then I got into posting on critical forums. Even then, I never ever proselytized. I said who I was and what I was interested in, yes. Because I believe in candor. And also I noticed that netizens are extremely paranoid about being trolled and they always want to know who people are. So I told them.

I never told them "You should do this, too." EVER.

Then after a couple years on alt.religion.scientology, I left the cult. As ever, I was candid with my friends and with everyone else that I still had interest in some of the teachings. People on ars were used to it. Some of them didn't LIKE it but they were smart enough not to accuse me of trying to get them involved in my belief system. I went over to some other forums, was just as candid and met a whole mess of paranoid people who freaked out over this frankness on my part. Yet they were suspicious enough to ask me again and again why I was posting, although I always answered them every time.

So I was informed by a few people that saying I was interested in Scn was the same thing as trying to get people into it. (Hi, I'm Caucasian and now that I've told you this, that means I'm trying to get you to dye yourself pale beige! It does! Really! Remember the book Black Like Me? Wellll.... :lol: )

But, nooo, I really really hated dissemination. I hated it when I was in the cult, I hated it as a Freezoner and I hated it as an Indie. The only thing I like to disseminate is recommendations for books and movies and stuff. I can get a little fanatical about them, actually. But not about ideology. Not sure why that is. I'm live and let live on that stuff.

Some people thought I was posting a lot of pro Scn stuff. I could see saying that when I was still in the cult, but after I left it, I made a point of repeatedly telling people that I did not care to discuss my beliefs with them, having no desire to see them picked apart. And believe me, some people disagreed with my refusal to do that and said as much.
But, actually, for the past 10 years, I've posted very little pro Scn stuff. I did post procedural type commentary about Scn practices on many occasions, as do some others. I did say I liked some things like auditing, when asked. And there were, of course, the off topic type discussions- the least said about those, the better.

But when I was a Scn'ist, I was a very unusual one in that I didn't like "dissem". This dislike carried through and I still had it when I was an Indie. I thought it was interesting to discuss Scn practices from a procedural standpoint and, yes, if I agreed with something Hubbard wrote (like the fun thread where I said I could see where he was coming from about the difference between a small child and a psycho.) I said as much. But mainly, I never really wanted to get other people to do what I was doing.

When I was in the cult, I had a coworker ask me about Scn as she was looking for something and I remember thinking "as sensitve as she is and as worried about money as she gets, I won't be doing her ANY favors if I guide her over to CofS" and I steered her away from it.

When I was a Freezoner I told more than a couple people who asked me to read what they wanted to read on their own and to not be afraid to just do their own thing. I told one girl (we'll call her "Jane") that she should more think of herself as a Janeologist.

I guess if there's one thing I would try to get people to do, if I had to pick something, it would be to patronize their local library and to order books from there, if they don't already do so.

But not the ideology thing.

Voltaire's Child

Fool on the Hill
I just hated the hunted or amused expression I used to get back in my "you shouldn't be an atheist" days. I also hated the salesmanship aspect of CofS. I hate sales at the best of times and CofS ain't the best of times.

It has been a very long time since I worried about other people's souls and thought that I had a better ideological way than they.

Voltaire's Child

Fool on the Hill
So I now expect to never again see any post or anything else claiming that I disseminated, was a KSW Scn'ist, got people into it, jumped on people the minute they disagreed with Scn, touted the tech, advertised the tech.

I realize I'm beating an old old drum, but there are some old old false claims that are still recently being made.

And I'm gonna get as shrill about it as I like.