My friend I am going to have to dissect this as much as I can because if there is one thing I can't stand it is flagrant generalities and absolutism. This is based on experience, nothing more.
1) Unitarinism (pretty lame and reasonable)
-No, not very reasonable and not very religious either. The UUA is a liberal, political and religious humanist society. It is not a church or religion, rather a place where all people can get together. It is disgustingly politically correct organization with no mention of God just in case Charlie atheist gets offended. The UUA claims to have no creed yet it is more a gathering place for the questioning and non-believing. Most people are Humanists and agnostic with no talk or worship to any kind of God. Humanism itself, especially Secular Humanism holds exactly all form of life cycles events (births, naming, weddings and funeral events) as any other religion would offer and deifies humanity to the point of Godlike. This is way scary, sorry to say and the biggest reason why I left Secular Humanism after only a few months of checking it out and attending meetings; same goes for skeptic societies. I myself have been to three Unitarian churches throughout North America and they are all basically the same.
2) Bhuddism (not too crazy)
There is a great debate amongst scholars especially as to how secularist and atheists see Buddhism, which is seen somehow as a non-theistic religion but this is very bad terminology. Buddhism believes in an ultimate reality, known as Nirvana. This ultimately reality is not a deity or a creator God, which is the westernized idea of an ultimate reality. Rather Nirvana is an impersonal experience but it is also spiritual so when I see and hear fundie atheists like Sam Harris take up Zen meditation, I simply shake my head and wonder why. There are gods, demigods, vega god, spiritual dimensions and other higher beings in all forms of Buddhism. There is also something in Buddhism similar to that of exteriorization in Scientology or out of body experiences in New Age groups. Theravada Buddhism is Transtheistic meaning that these gobs are imperfect and not the purpose of the religion. Mahayana, which is very pantheistic and sees Buddha hood, Bodhisattva hood as well as Nirvana as omnipresent and obtainable without necessarily being a monk; unlike Theravada. Buddhists do not deny the existence of ultimate reality but merely see it in another way, which is different from the west. If a Buddhist does deny ultimate reality then he or she needs to switch religions. Rather Buddhists do not believe in a creator God. This does not make them atheists or agnostics, it makes them non-monotheists but they still believe in things, which are above our reality and therefore false according to materialism. I myself have been affiliated with three Buddhist organizations off and on for over 10 years including Thai Theravada, Chinese Pre Land, Tibetan Buddhist and Japanese Soto Zen.
3) Christianity (substantially more crazy)
-A pretty strong statement seeing is how there are over 4,200 churches and denominations within Christianity alone. Which version are we looking at, the racist, homophobic Westboro Baptist Church or the woman ordaining, gay marrying, pro-life United Church of Christ? Let’s get specific before we generalize.
4) Catholicism (incrementaly more crazy)
-The same as Christianity and Catholics also have splits that are not homophobic and allow nuns and priests to marry. These liberal or modern churches also bless same sex unions.
4) Judaism (more crazy with matzo balls)
-I am Jewish and if there is one thing I know is that I am sure you probably no nothing or very little about Judaism. In fact I will take a wild guess and say you grew up a Christian, probably Roman Catholic but I may be wrong. Judaism is not understood well by the Christian world. It is in fact grossly misinterpreted. Judaism and Christianity are completely different regardless of what the Evangelicals tell you.
Judaism for the most part believes that this life is meant to be enjoyed and unlike Catholicism, we are not living in this life in order to score points to get in heaven. That is 100% Christianity. Jewish people of all kinds dance, sing and celebrate life in a very positive way. If you have never been to a Shabbat at the kotel, you will never understand. Please do not say anything about my religion unless you are making a valid argument, which does not reference matzo ball soup. This is something not all Jews eat by the way.
Also if you are a fan of Religulous you know even less about all religions, but particularity Judaism since the only Jew he interviewed was an Anti-Zionist, which is a political movement just do not tell the Orthodox that, supporter of the President of Iran and a Holocaust denier. Yeah great research there Bill boy.
6) Islam (getting pretty crazy)
-Again which part? You mean the Muslims of Turkey who have had a secular government with equal rights for all religions since the time of the Ottoman Empire? Or how about those nonexistent terrorists from Albania, or Bosnia committing the horrible act of re-estasholishing Christian churches and Jewish synagogues since after they were ban by the truly totalitarian state atheism. Sure, Iran and Saudi Arabia are effed up, but come on. There are 1.5 billion Muslims in the word and by 2025; Islam will be the most populated religion on the Earth thus taking over Christianities 2000 plus rule.
7) Mormonism (clearly in the damn crazy)
-By beliefs it is hard for me to believe that Jesus was revealed in the Americas, that Adam and Eve lived in Jefferson country, Missouri and that the Native Americans are coloured red because of a curse. I know my friend Dana from Cincinnati is a Mormon one of the greatest human beings I have ever met, so who cares if I think he is wrong? He is a great guy and totally sane. Unlike some Scientologists I have met.
8) Scientology (about as nutty as it gets) (sorry !)
-Don't be sorry to apologize for having your beliefs. You have the right to think as you wish. You are a very courageous person and I tip my hat to your fight against Scientology but I think that being an anti-religious, absolutist called Scientism simply makes one, not necessarily you, think with the same mentality of the people one hates.
Most of the people you listed above sound crazy because they believe that they are right 100% of the time and know life in and out 100%. This can also apply to science, atheism, secularism, humanism and materialism.
I had the great pleasure and displeasure of being a Scientologist. I am 100% totally skeptical of anyone who speaks with the same mentality; meaning that they or their little group knows everything and everyone else is wrong. I especially can’t stand generalities and absolutes regardless of whether they are political, social, religion or secularist, atheistic, “skeptical” or materialistic.