The part of my story I never tell (my wall of fire)

[Good twin]

Thanks Polly. Really.

 

[Good twin]

Has anyone seen Alanzo?

I'm expecting either a commendation or a cramming order.

 

[Sai Ninja 2000]

well done

good twin - thank you so much for having the courage to share this story. it was a real insight. that took guts, and i'm glad you did. you are a strong individual and you went through some trying times. i'm glad you got out.

well done.

 

[Alanzo]

Has anyone seen Alanzo?

I'm expecting either a commendation or a cramming order.

Your story kept coming back to me throughout the day today.

I kept thinking about how we completely forgot who we were, and did things our true selves would never do.

 

[SchwimmelPuckel]

Your story kept coming back to me throughout the day today.

I kept thinking about how we completely forgot who we were, and did things our true selves would never do.

Yes.. That is the salient point! - Implantology!

Scary shit!

It has to cease!

 

[Good twin]

Your story kept coming back to me throughout the day today.

I kept thinking about how we completely forgot who we were, and did things our true selves would never do.

Yes. But there was a very positive side to this too. I guess telling this story has helped me more than I realized. I realize that the fact that Scientology "boldened" me was at times dangerous, but also afforded me a tremendous wealth of experience. I really did do things that I most likely wouldn't have, if I weren't convinced my decisions were based on more than my own interests.

Becoming a Scientologist awakened my spirit of adventure and my ability to look forward more than back. I am truly grateful for that. I was part of a culture that believed that time starts now. Since the only consequence of any value was losing Scientology, I was willing to risk anything else I ever had. I really don't regret that. Of course I mourn the losses, but the experience really is priceless.

Because of the confidence I gained from the cult, I have great stories. (and totally shot adrenal glands)

 

[Alanzo]

Yes. But there was a very positive side to this too. I guess telling this story has helped me more than I realized. I realize that the fact that Scientology "boldened" me was at times dangerous, but also afforded me a tremendous wealth of experience. I really did do things that I most likely wouldn't have, if I weren't convinced my decisions were based on more than my own interests.

Becoming a Scientologist awakened my spirit of adventure and my ability to look forward more than back. I am truly grateful for that. I was part of a culture that believed that time starts now. Since the only consequence of any value was losing Scientology, I was willing to risk anything else I ever had. I really don't regret that. Of course I mourn the losses, but the experience really is priceless.

Because of the confidence I gained from the cult, I have great stories. (and totally shot adrenal glands)

That's correct. The idea that I was working for something larger than myself, bigger than the whole planet even, got me to do things I normally would have never done.

I am, more and more, looking back on my time in Scientology as an overall positive experience. (That is easier to do now that I am no longer being bankrupted and enslaved by it.)

There are people back here in my home town who have no clue about the life that I have lived. I set out to have a different kind of life, and I got one. I find that I don't judge myself by the same standards everyone else does. That is one thing that I always knew never to do.

This true self thing is an interesting concept.

If I look at my true self, I was always going to join Scientology, and I was always going to become a fanatic, work for free, become enslaved, and then break free from the slavery and have them chase me. And then turn around and let them have it with everything I've got.

It was one of many choices I had when I walked into the Champaign Mission that day on July 4th, 1984. I can even remember saying to myself "All right, this could go either way. But any way it goes, I'm going to have fun."

Scientology was my ticket out of a boring, milquetoast, middle class existence.

I'm glad I had the courage to do it.

 

[Panda Termint]

^^^ I like this viewpoint. ^^^

 

[EP - Ethics Particle]

Agreement

That's correct. The idea that I was working for something larger than myself, bigger than the whole planet even, got me to do things I normally would have never done.

I am, more and more, looking back on my time in Scientology as an overall positive experience. (That is easier to do now that I am no longer being bankrupted and enslaved by it.)

...snip...

Scientology was my ticket out of a boring, milquetoast, middle class existence.

I'm glad I had the courage to do it.

^^^ I like this viewpoint. ^^^

At the risk of being redundant - I like it too.

EP
Mike Horton

 

[Enthetan]

That's correct. The idea that I was working for something larger than myself, bigger than the whole planet even, got me to do things I normally would have never done.

I am, more and more, looking back on my time in Scientology as an overall positive experience. (That is easier to do now that I am no longer being bankrupted and enslaved by it.)

There are people back here in my home town who have no clue about the life that I have lived. I set out to have a different kind of life, and I got one. I find that I don't judge myself by the same standards everyone else does. That is one thing that I always knew never to do.

This true self thing is an interesting concept.

If I look at my true self, I was always going to join Scientology, and I was always going to become a fanatic, work for free, become enslaved, and then break free from the slavery and have them chase me. And then turn around and let them have it with everything I've got.

It was one of many choices I had when I walked into the Champaign Mission that day on July 4th, 1984. I can even remember saying to myself "All right, this could go either way. But any way it goes, I'm going to have fun."

Scientology was my ticket out of a boring, milquetoast, middle class existence.

I'm glad I had the courage to do it.

If you joined the Marines, you would also have had some life-changing experiences and done things you normally would have never done.

And it would have been cheaper.

I also joined the SO mainly because I wanted some adventure.

 

[Zinjifar]

Hey, me too.

I'd put it this way, the Scientology Experience can be valuable in discovering that you *can* change your life.

And, once you've dumped all the things you were told to change it into, eliminated the external steering and control, deleted the Cult run Remote Controls and laughed at the idea of giving credit to Ron for everything you accomplish...

Well, you get to *keep* that part.

Zinj

 

[FoTi]

I kept thinking about how we completely forgot who we were, and did things our true selves would never do.

YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN!!!!

 

[grinder]

Sounds to me like Rick "manned up" and did the right thing. I'd do the same, except for the kid maybe.

His lifes work made off limits, his life partner say fuck you and hands him a gun, and his friends help her.

Only fault I see is that he did it in front of others.

No church did this. Any of it. People did. Church is an idea people have to make themselves right without the full responsibility. People are the church.

Its a story needing to be told. Good on ya Good Twin. Now I know why it says sometimes evil. I know about that too.

 

[Kookaburra]

Sounds to me like Rick "manned up" and did the right thing. I'd do the same, except for the kid maybe.

His lifes work made off limits, his life partner say fuck you and hands him a gun, and his friends help her.

Only fault I see is that he did it in front of others.

No church did this. Any of it. People did. Church is an idea people have to make themselves right without the full responsibility. People are the church.

Its a story needing to be told. Good on ya Good Twin. Now I know why it says sometimes evil. I know about that too.

I don't agree with this statement at all. I see and act of total desperation after losing everything including your family and having the group you dedicated your life to and gave all your money to turns on you. But absolutely nothing "right" about it.

It's a horrible thing, but it is something that keeps repeating itself in Scientology. There is a very high suicide rate, after people have been subjected to the excesses of the cult.

Yes, people do it. People subject other people to ordeals that are too much for them to handle. There is also something inherent in the organization that brings out these traits in people. There is some sort of callousness that is considered an attribute in Scientology. A lack of empathy for others is a step towards sociopathy. A complete lack of empathy makes a complete sociopath. There are a lot of reasons to have no empathy. The person you are dealing with is out ethics, they have other fish to fry, they are disaffected, they are PTS, they are SP, they are a DB, they have overts, they are cutting across the only hope mankind ever had, you have to declare them to get them back, the church is only protecting itself, yada, yada, yada. This ethics "tech" manufacturers sociopaths.

 

[Zinjifar]

Sounds to me like Rick "manned up" and did the right thing. I'd do the same, except for the kid maybe.

His lifes work made off limits, his life partner say fuck you and hands him a gun, and his friends help her.

Only fault I see is that he did it in front of others.

No church did this. Any of it. People did. Church is an idea people have to make themselves right without the full responsibility. People are the church.

Its a story needing to be told. Good on ya Good Twin. Now I know why it says sometimes evil. I know about that too.

That's a pretty common excuse Grinder; that the 'Church' (or Scientology, or The Philosophy) didn't do it; people did.

There's some truth, but, the truth is also that there is no crime in the Scientology Organization that is not justified, promoted and celebrated in the 'Philosophy'.

Yes, while 'people' did things, it was the 'Church' that assigned them to do them. And it was the 'philosophy' that not only allowed it but promoted it.

Almost none of the people who commit crimes of Scientology would do so *without* Scientology telling them to do so.

Zinj

 

[Alanzo]

Sounds to me like Rick "manned up" and did the right thing. I'd do the same, except for the kid maybe.

His lifes work made off limits, his life partner say fuck you and hands him a gun, and his friends help her.

Only fault I see is that he did it in front of others.

No church did this. Any of it. People did. Church is an idea people have to make themselves right without the full responsibility. People are the church.

Its a story needing to be told. Good on ya Good Twin. Now I know why it says sometimes evil. I know about that too.

People are Scientologists like YOU.

Fanatical people.

People who have little evil pinheads who can only think in implanted pathways designed to destroy other people.

If you were scanning your environment for an SP, and you walked in front of a mirror, and found YOU, then you would certainly serve.

Surprise!

You are now an SP, for the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics.

Congratulations, Grinder.

Is this what you got into Scientology to become?

 

[Alanzo]

One of the things I loved about GoodTwin's story was how the fire-bombing of one of their missions became an income opportunity for the Church of Scientology.

The Church of Scientology is run by leaches who exploit the vulnerability of their fellow earthlings in order to enrich themselves.

Scientologists who begin to realize that, get out as soon as it becomes clear to them - despite all the leaches' attempts to hide it from them, or to coerce them to look away from that fact.

Anyone who stays in the Church of Scientology beyond the point of realizing this, belongs there.

 

[Good twin]

Apparently the message is different depending on your point of view. I didn't expect everyone to see what happened the same way. I know over the past 7 years I've changed how I feel about it and think of it many many times.

I tried to tell the story the way it was and is. Evaluation of why things played out the way they did, and who or what is accountable isn't even part of the story.

However, by reading more from others who are out and allowing myself to explore life from outside of the cult bubble. I can say that covering up tragedies like this one and Scooter's story and Neo's and TookMeAwhile's exwife's is obviously too common to be coincidence. It's doctrine. And having policy that prohibits Scientologists to take legal action against each other is a whole new level of creepy.

Take what you want from my story, but please keep reading. There is a running theme. Zinj was right.

 

[Good twin]

BTW- One of my boys is reading this thread now. Please be kind. We haven't cried together for years.

 

[Alanzo]

Apparently the message is different depending on your point of view. I didn't expect everyone to see what happened the same way. I know over the past 7 years I've changed how I feel about it and think of it many many times.

I tried to tell the story the way it was and is. Evaluation of why things played out the way they did, and who or what is accountable isn't even part of the story.

However, by reading more from others who are out and allowing myself to explore life from outside of the cult bubble. I can say that covering up tragedies like this one and Scooter's story and Neo's and TookMeAwhile's exwife's is obviously too common to be coincidence. It's doctrine. And having policy that prohibits Scientologists to take legal action against each other is a whole new level of creepy.

Take what you want from my story, but please keep reading. There is a running theme. Zinj was right.

I hate it when Zinj is right, but:

SCIENTOLOGY: It's always worse than you think.