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Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology - PART ONE

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GoNuclear

Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

Here's how Scientology gets cult members to stupidly surrender up all their possessions, assets and money to the "church".





THE TRICK: Convince Scientologists that they don't need to own MEST to "have" it. Then take away their MEST and give them a certificate that boldly proclaims their high havingness.

I believe it was Gordon Gekko in the original "Wall Street" movie who summed it up best ... "It's all about the money. The rest is just conversation."

Pete
 

HelluvaHoax!

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Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

..

When I was a Scientologist, I used to read Hubbard's words and search for profundity and wisdom. My mind grew accustomed to imagining powerful dense layerings of truth within his precious words.

Now, when I read Hubbard, it is mostly nonsensical.

Just read what he actually says. Without adding or detracting anything. It is absurd and stupid.

Here's a promo piece that CC International sent me today, bragging about Ron's "incredible" wisdom.


Dear (HelluvaHoax!),

Please read this incredible LRH quote and answer the one question below for me!

“... we provided a route. Now, that route is a double route. It’s a route by study — it’s a route by processing. And we haven’t begun to explore or exploit what can be done by study alone. ...

“The fact of it is, you could probably study somebody right up these levels and straight up through to the top. ...

“It’s the ideas you get, the looking at the rules and the laws, and adding them up to your life and cogniting on them, becoming wiser, smarter along these particular lines. You suddenly look at that and blow that, and you understand something else and boom, that goes, and so forth. This is not something that you should neglect as a case advance.

“Yes, it’s always an advance in wisdom, but have you ever really looked at it as a straight case advance?”

— LRH, HANDLING THE PTS, 8 June 1965

So, with that in mind, I would like to know — how do you feel this quote relates to your progress on The Bridge?

Lv, Milan


My God! Those words of wisdom are completely vague and incoherent ramblings!

But, nonetheless, I'd like to answer Milan's question about how this quote relates to my progress on The Bridge.

Dear Milan,

Thanks for sending me those "incredible" quotes by Ron. In answer to your question, it was "incredible" quotes like this that changed my progress on the Bridge. When I read enough of those things that Ron said, it actually stopped me entirely from being on the Bridge.

Because, what he said was in fact "incredible". Just not the definition that you are using.

Please keep sending those quotes out. You are helping people more than you imagine.

ML,

HelluvaHoax!
 

Gadfly

Crusader
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

..

When I was a Scientologist, I used to read Hubbard's words and search for profundity and wisdom. My mind grew accustomed to imagining powerful dense layerings of truth within his precious words.

Now, when I read Hubbard, it is mostly nonsensical.

Just read what he actually says. Without adding or detracting anything. It is absurd and stupid.

Here's a promo piece that CC International sent me today, bragging about Ron's "incredible" wisdom.

My God! Those words of wisdom are completely vague and incoherent ramblings!

But, nonetheless, I'd like to answer Milan's question about how this quote relates to my progress on The Bridge.

I learned to notice this about great bullshitters, such as Hubbard and a few on this board. They speak endlessly in generalities. They speak in vague abstractions that connect to very little in terms of details, they provide few specifics, and they refer to even less that can be observed or experienced.

These people often sound "intelligent", because they can go on and on, adding words upon words. They are GREAT at "significance", and endlessly spinning ideas and endless connections of ideas. But, there is little there of "substance". The ideas often do not relate to anything "actual" or "real" - not outside of over-active imaginations. In the words of Korzybski, there is little or no existing terrain for the map. People like Hubbard require people who will "contribute to the scam" by feeding the vague, fictional & over-generalized Scientology ideas with their own imaginative details. In other words, Hubbard needs the dub-in of the flock to continue the charade.

:yes: :ohmy: :omg:
 

HelluvaHoax!

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Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

I learned to notice this about great bullshitters, such as Hubbard and a few on this board. They speak endlessly in generalities. They speak in vague abstractions that connect to very little in terms of details, they provide few specifics, and they refer to even less that can be observed or experienced.

These people often sound "intelligent", because they can go on and on, adding words upon words. They are GREAT at "significance", and endlessly spinning ideas and endless connections of ideas. But, there is little there of "substance". The ideas often do not relate to anything "actual" or "real" - not outside of over-active imaginations. In the words of Korzybski, there is little or no existing terrain for the map. People like Hubbard require people who will "contribute to the scam" by feeding the vague, fictional & over-generalized Scientology ideas with their own imaginative details. In other words, Hubbard needs the dub-in of the flock to continue the charade.
:yes: :ohmy: :omg:

Cool post!

Scientology is the world's only
Chinese Finger Trap of the mind
that you not only get to wear--


Millennials_The_Chinese_Finger_Trap_for_Marketers.jpg


--but you get to manufacture for yourself too.
 

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

You suddenly look at that and blow that, and you understand something else and boom, that goes, and so forth.

- John Madden on Scientology






:hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:

That was freaking hilarious!!!

For those not familiar with John Madden, here is Frank Caliendo's impersonation of him....

[video=youtube;XBW7ysPcbT0]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBW7ysPcbT0[/video]
 
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Boojuum

Silver Meritorious Patron
Bulk Mail

Bulk mail a la Scientology is near the top of my stupid list.

Bulk Mail is a religious rite in Scientology.

I remember the sacred bulk mail campaigns that the org would conduct. Witness the miraculous 6 or 8 week lag between bulk mail out and income. I've also seen that there was some truth to sending out a ton of mail and seeing income go up. But it was a paltry money. 100's of hours and $ spent to increase GI by a few thousand dollars--maybe and doing it week after week, month after month, year after year. Was it really effective or just one of those LRH things that got overused because that's what the tech said to do.

Mass mailings is one thing but a true Scientologist disconnects thinking from bulk mail. Bulk mail is a religious rite. An org sends out mail and money comes in. Simple as that, read the PL. But look at the results!!! Oh, the GI went up because we kept sending out mail.

The stupid is this: if you're trying to save lives and clear the planet, why don't the orgs contact people face to face instead of blasting them with STALE, MEANINGLESS, POORLY DONE promo. Some of the stuff we sent out was barely readible! I didn't meet anyone who got in because of the promo. I've heard of people coming in after years of being bombarded with promo but I have to believe it's the exception.

The notion was to apply the magical incantation of sending out mail--to anyone about anything of any quality and money will come in.

I cringe to think that I bought into the Bulk Mail scripture like the dupe that I was. The reason why orgs are empty is that Scientology exploits people and uses high pressure sales tactics and demeans people and that's exactly what LRH wanted.:omg:
 

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Bulk Mail

Bulk mail a la Scientology is near the top of my stupid list.

Bulk Mail is a religious rite in Scientology.

I remember the sacred bulk mail campaigns that the org would conduct. Witness the miraculous 6 or 8 week lag between bulk mail out and income. I've also seen that there was some truth to sending out a ton of mail and seeing income go up. But it was a paltry money. 100's of hours and $ spent to increase GI by a few thousand dollars--maybe and doing it week after week, month after month, year after year. Was it really effective or just one of those LRH things that got overused because that's what the tech said to do.

Mass mailings is one thing but a true Scientologist disconnects thinking from bulk mail. Bulk mail is a religious rite. An org sends out mail and money comes in. Simple as that, read the PL. But look at the results!!! Oh, the GI went up because we kept sending out mail.

The stupid is this: if you're trying to save lives and clear the planet, why don't the orgs contact people face to face instead of blasting them with STALE, MEANINGLESS, POORLY DONE promo. Some of the stuff we sent out was barely readible! I didn't meet anyone who got in because of the promo. I've heard of people coming in after years of being bombarded with promo but I have to believe it's the exception.

The notion was to apply the magical incantation of sending out mail--to anyone about anything of any quality and money will come in.

I cringe to think that I bought into the Bulk Mail scripture like the dupe that I was. The reason why orgs are empty is that Scientology exploits people and uses high pressure sales tactics and demeans people and that's exactly what LRH wanted.:omg:


Great post! I was recently thinking about bulk mail and wondering how much money has been spend since 1950 on worthless promo.

If only 10% of the GI was allocated (I don't know the actual percentage) that would have to be a half-billion dollars right there.

$500,000,000 on drawings of waterfalls (purification r/d) and rocketships hurtling thru space (OT). All because people said "waterfalls" and "rocketships" when they were surveyed.

Sure, they said "waterfalls" and "rocketships" because they had received a half million pieces worth of junk mail with those pictures on it. All of which they promptly threw out and which had nothing to do with their coming into the org in the first place.

I tend to think that if Hubbard had been a plumber instead of a sci-fi writer, the graphic depictions in Advance! magazine would have been different.


Follow the Road to Total Freedom

new-copper-plumbing-system.gif


And......

toilet-flush.jpg


flush away your charge!
 
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guanoloco

As-Wased
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

So I posted this on another thread but it merits posting here...

Here goes...

When you have a cavity the place to go to is the dentist who has the "tech" on cavities, their prevention and cure.

When you have a legal problem you seek out a lawyer.

Auto engine is knocking means it's time to see the mechanic.

A medical issue is usually best solved by a medical professional, yadda, yadda, yadda.

How come then when one is "PTS" one gets a declare and sent away from the "Church"? The one place that is even aware of PTS as a condition and has the tech to discover it and fix it and all that?

How stupid is that?

Seems to me that if a person was "PTS" the right and correct place to be would ulitmately be the Church of Suppressive MESTology.

Instead, a person gets declared and pariahed like they suffer from terminal halitosis or something (which, I guess, would be a condition of being stuck in Ron's valence...just sayin'...have you seen those teeth?).

Here's some of the latest completions displaying their wins from Ron's teeth tech.

rotten-teeth-8.jpg


image.php
rotten-teeth11.jpg
 

Stat

Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

Ron's teeth tek sucked because it's none of our business why.
(It might be explained in the not released yet OT levels.)
But the rotten teeth pics you posted are just plain scary! :omg:

r26alc.jpg
 

Stat

Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

Stat(istics) Correction term is Scientology Admin is another stupid moment.

While pretending to be a merely corrective something for insignificant changes,
that happened somehow, it really is another tool to cover up the fact that false
stats is a common phenomena in the Scientology's "straight up and vertical" expansion.

It might sound a bit general, but people who were on staff/Sea Org know what
I am talking about.

Think about it, why would there be a need to even come up with a Stat Correction
term in the first place? It's the most ethical group on the planet! Yet, I believe it's even in an Admin Dictionary.

Hmm...
 

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

Celebrity Center International has made a huge technical breakthrough and discovered the ruin of "celebrities".

Well, errr, it must be a big ruin because they have sent me this promo piece 2 times in the same week.

I don't know about you, but this sure as hell handled my ruin!!


Dear (HelluvaHoax!)

Here is a great quote from LRH on that funny feeling you get when you miss a stair... Certainly answered it for me! Is this phenomenon real to you?

Lv, Milan

“A thetan would rather hit something than hit nothing any day of the week. If you’ve ever stepped off a bottom step that wasn’t there, into emptiness, and you knew you were going to walk out on the level from that bottom step, yet there was another step present, boy, that was a terrific jar. You stepped into nothing. It wasn’t the impact at the end of it, it was the nothing you hit. But if you try to walk on the extra step and there’s just the floor there, it stands you up a little bit, but you don’t mind it as much. A guy really can go practically to pieces by stepping off that extra step when he didn’t think it was there.”

— L. Ron Hubbard, 1st American ACC, Anesthesia in Bodies, Part II


This explains everything! Why COB "hits" Scientologists. Why registrars try to "hit" me up for money and why Ron's music did not become a "hit".

OMG, Scientologists have "wins" on anything that Hubbard says. It's so so so so so stoopid!
 

Stat

Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

OMG, Scientologists have "wins" on anything that Hubbard says. It's so so so so so stoopid!

Yeah, like in that London Congress on Dissemination and Help, where Hubbard said
something about 25% of population will get better no matter what you do or say in
trying to help them (while collecting their cash). I think he was right about that and
cleverly used it. And some Scientologists still don't get the irony.
 

guanoloco

As-Wased
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

One of the stupidest things about Scientology and something that is truly backwards about it is the whole "help" button and the countless lectures, PLs, HCOBs and yap about it - it's even the subject of the deadly quartet and all about Help and Dissemination and other crap.

The main thing to know is that a being's ability to help is an index to their sanity. Same goes for groups.

If a person or group can still help then they are sane. If they cannot help then they're completely bonkers. It's the last button to go "out" per Scientology.

First is interest - it can go out and the entity is still sane.

Then communication - it can be out but you still may have a sane entity/terminal.

Then control - that may be out and you still have a sane thing.

But finally when the help goes out - well, brother, you're bonkers...come a cropper...appetite over tincup and up the pole, so to speak.

Now, compare that with the consensus of ex-Scientologists who consider the term Depraved Indifference a very fitting description of Scientology as an enterprise.

Scientology is completely devoid of help and can merely sell books and courses and other crap. It advertises help and as soon as you show up for help it flips the table and asks for help as in what are you going to do to help Ron Clear the planet? What are you going to do to help the org?

When asked for help it will demonstrate depraved indifference in the face of the most severest straights a person can go through.

I know...I've been there, done that.

Depraved Indifference: To constitute depraved indifference, the defendant's conduct must be 'so wanton, so deficient in a moral sense of concern, so lacking in regard for the life or lives of others, and so blameworthy as to warrant the same criminal liability as that which the law imposes upon a person who intentionally causes a crime. Depraved indifference focuses on the risk created by the defendant’s conduct, not the injuries actually resulting.

How's that for help?

Talk about a complete and total 180 degree reversal...just ask Lisa McPherson.


PS. Here's a quote from Ron the Humanitarian: I also, the last month I was there, was following Hubbard's orders, and I read this one that - I don't know how many times I had to read it before it could really sink in - was that Elaine Wright was going to commit suicide. And Hubbard -- this is what the order said, "I don't care if Elaine Wright is going to commit suicide or not, but get her off of my land before she does." Where was the help?
 

guanoloco

As-Wased
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

More on Scientology and Hubbard help (or should it be MORON Scientology and Hubbard help?:biggrin:)...this is from that same Ron the Humanitarian and it is so fitting I wanted to let one read the whole thing here:

Testimony of Mrs. Hartwell. To view the RealMedia® testimonies from this trial, look for the "Clearwater Hearings" page at Xenu TV.

[....]

L. Ron Hubbard believed that anybody that was ill was a double threat to him: number one, he couldn't --- they couldn't produce, so they were no good to him; number two, he was terrified of a germ of any kind, and so they were locked up in, I'd say, about a ten by twelve room. And at one time there was thirteen boys and girls in this room, running high fevers and all of them smoking. I mean, you could hardly see within there, it was so terrible. And you were treated -- they were treated like an enemy in this room, and because they were. Hubbard, I saw him throw fits. I actually saw him take his hat off one day and stomp on it and cry like a baby. I have seen him just take his arm like this and throw it wild and hit girls in the face. And one girl would follow him with a chair. If he sat down, that chair had to be right where he was going to sit. One girl missed by a few inches; he about fell off of it, and she was put in the RPF. [The Scientology prison, where inmates are put to forced, slave labor.]

And the other girl would carry an ashtray, catching his cigarette ash. They had to pop the cigarettes in his mouth when he wanted it. He had one man that would just wash his clothes and tended them, changed his clothes for him. He had a nurse. He had one woman who did nothing but clean the house. And he had one man that did nothing but cook his three meals a day. It took him from about six in the morning till about ten at night to get those three meals prepared.

I was with Hubbard every day for about a month. I should say, every night. We would start -- our daily job would start about twelve o'clock, and we would go at noon, and we would go until the sun came up the next morning, and a lot --- most of the time without anything to eat after six o'clock at night. And so, we were working almost around the clock, except for the evening meal.

They said that they couldn't -- no way could they give me any auditing because of my illness, because Ernie was upset and had me upset and that, as soon as Ernie left, why, then, they would start and give me real auditing and get me to the doctor.

By the way, when they came to sign us up, I explained to them my trouble and I told them that I needed a good doctor and I did think that, maybe, auditing. would help, and which they promised me both. And -- so this is one of the -- they showed me a picture of-the hotel and said that "Do you think-that Hubbard would live in anything any worse than this?" So, naturally, that's where we expected to come.

Okay. The RPF down there didn't function like it did over here because they had no place for the RPF. Another thing, when we went out days, we were schooled that we had to -- it was a bad place for rattlesnakes, scorpions, and, of course, black widow spiders. We had to wear boots and carry flashlights at night. The RPF had their clothes in boxes, and their mattresses were thrown out on the ground with the spiders and the scorpions. They had to run everywhere; you couldn't talk-to them. I was written-up several times for talking to Fredawn.

I also saw her one day -- every time I would go by on my way to work, I would see her dragging her mattress from one shade tree to the other. I said, "Why are you doing this?" And she was ill and she couldn't be in with the others, and so she was hunting shade and keeping out of the sun; it's 117 degrees, and she was hunting shade because she was ill.

I was worked one day -- ironed out in the heat -out in, I mean, in the shade. And it was 102 degrees then and without any food the whole day. And by five thirty I just got deathly ill, and I told them I had to leave. And I staggered quite a ways -- it's about three blocks from where we were shooting to where we -- up to where we -- where the dorm was. And I was staggering. I fell first in the -- then, in the ditch; it was like I was drunk. But anyway, I made it to the bunk and just crashed.

They came in and woke me up and said at seven o'clock I had to go down because Hubbard was going to be on the set. And I wouldn't do it. And I was written up because I took a three-hour nap. So, this -- and another time I complained I had to go home because I wasn't being treated. I was thin and bleeding and in quite severe pain, and they took me right in and put me on the Meter, said I could go home -- or go right to the doctor. And the next night they had us scrubbing the barn. We started at six o'clock and we scrubbed that barn until four o'clock in the morning, and they had me carry the buckets of water.

And this -- nobody -- anybody that run a fever was immediately put out of commission. But anybody that was ill and. not running a fever, they were made fun of and ridiculed because they thought more of their body than they did of Hubbard's work.

There was no unity; there was no working together. It was, like, if you were going over here and somebody was coming this way, you couldn't stop and say, "Hello," because, then, that would stop you and slow you down so you might not get your work done.

And one day we were laughing and joking on the job, and the supervisor told us if she ever caught us doing .that again we'd go in the RPF. It was strictly work, no pleasure.

If you were in the lower conditions, all money stopped coming in, what little of it there was. You didn't get any pay and you didn't get any lib; you were just held prisoner.

While I was there -- when we first got there, about two days after we left home, which was about a five-hour trip, my nephew drowned. And we didn't get word -- it took ten days for them to notify us that my nephew had died. And this was by a letter from my sister that went to Clearwater and then back to where we were, because they wouldn't give us a telephone call. All our mail was read before it got to that base. I wrote three letters to Ernie before I got through, and I finally said everything was going great because everything else came back and I had to rewrite it. All the mail, like I said, had to come here and then go to Clearwater.

Nearly every time I went to the phone after Ernie' left, I had to be -- there was a guard with us. I could never be alone after that.

Oh, by the way, too, when my nephew did die and I got word of it, I demanded that I go into Palm Springs and make a phone call to my sister. And it took us from seven o'clock in the morning till-about six-thirty that night. And they finally give us this broken-down truck. We had to buy the gas. They gave us two hours. if we weren't back in two hours, they were going to call the police and have us arrested for stealing the truck.

I saw a man -- I don't know how many were at the base while I was there, but it was quite a few. I saw a grown-man, such as my husband -- he cried for days, maybe two to three days. And they were under constant guard before they were allowed to leave. They drove people so close to suicide before they were allowed to leave that base. The women was just constantly crying, and it was -- it just tore me up.

I also, the last month I was there, was following Hubbard's orders, and I read this one that - I don't know how many times I had to read it before it could really sink in - was that Elaine Wright was going to commit suicide. And Hubbard -- this is what the order said, "I don't care if Elaine Wright is going to commit suicide or not, but get her off of my land before she does." Where was the help?

You know, where was the religious counseling?

The only time that the word "God" was used was in vain, and I mean, it was used constantly. There was no civil talking to each other. It was all cussing and swearing.

I know one night I had to cry, and crying would take me into Ethics. So, I laid out on the diving board where I could see all around me and I had me a cry.

Another thing that was shocking, too, was that Ernie wrote me a most wonderful letter, and I was so thrilled because he was taking -- he was on the horse and he was doing so great, and I thought, "Well, gee, I'll show them." So, I showed it to one of the girls, and she said, "You can go right down into Ethics." And she said, "And you get this straightened out right now." They don't want you to be happy. They don't want you to be united; it's just individualism.

[....]
 

HelluvaHoax!

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...

How to get un-stupidl (cross-posted from another thread on Debbie Cook)


"It is a scientifically proven fact that an individual's
ScIQ goes up one point for each hour of Internet lurking."

- Hell Ron Hoaxard - Creation of Human (gul) Ablity




ScIQ -noun. (sigh-que) The intelligence quotient (IQ) of a Scientologist regarding the subject of Scientology. No known cases exist where a Scientologist's ScIQ has been charted higher than 110, because the moment it exceeds the average range (90-110) the person departs Scientology.
 

guanoloco

As-Wased
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

Hey...remember all that yap about exchange and how it keys in the bank?

You know...that's the reason Scientology has to charge so much so that the being stays in exchange and doesn't get their bank keyed in.

Well now, with all the ex Scionos and other critics obviously stewing in their wretched banks and all nattery and such...seems to me that Scientology should "up" their prices to keep that bank off the thetan.

How's that for "clearing"? Merely charge enough and the "charge" comes off. Looks like if you factually paid enough it would remove the bank off the thetan.

Thanks, Ron, for your masterful tech and being mankind's greatest friend!

ML,

guano
 

HelluvaHoax!

Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

---snipped---

Thanks, Ron, for your masterful tech and being mankind's greatest friend!


What great timing because I just pulled in the most amazing invitation to celebrate 101 years of "Mankind's Greatest Friend".

I wanted to share it with you because I can't make it that night due to some other greatest good I am making go right. So, you can use my ticket!!

I'll expect some exchange so you don't go crime because not all the big beings who want to attend can possibly fit into that tiny MEST auditorium.

And, OMG, there are only 25 days left!!! Get on it buddy!

Unknown-7.jpg


Sad closing thought. Somewhere there are Scientologists right now who "can't wait" to go to this event and give Ron a standing ovation. And they are really, really hoping that he will be there without his body watching them flow power to him.

Isn't it one of the tests of stupid to go to an event and celebrate the birthday of a dead man who stole money from you?
 

Moosejewels

Patron Meritorious
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology

What great timing because I just pulled in the most amazing invitation to celebrate 101 years of "Mankind's Greatest Friend".

I wanted to share it with you because I can't make it that night due to some other greatest good I am making go right. So, you can use my ticket!!

I'll expect some exchange so you don't go crime because not all the big beings who want to attend can possibly fit into that tiny MEST auditorium.

And, OMG, there are only 25 days left!!! Get on it buddy!

Unknown-7.jpg


Sad closing thought. Somewhere there are Scientologists right now who "can't wait" to go to this event and give Ron a standing ovation. And they are really, really hoping that he will be there without his body watching them flow power to him.

Isn't it one of the tests of stupid to go to an event and celebrate the birthday of a dead man who stole money from you?


:yes::yes::yes::yes::yes::yes: And what's with the "Space Shades" anyway ? Alien influence !
 
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