Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology - PART ONE
- Thread starter HelluvaHoax!
- Start date
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Victoria
Patron Meritorious
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
He told Jessie they were just going to take him out to dinner. But as they drove down Sunset? Blvd. Jessie saw a whole billboard that said "Happy Birthday Jessie!"
Jessie said he was in awe of it all, having never had such a fuss made about him for a birthday.
But there was more!
Jessie IIRC didn't really name many names of who was there, but all top management were on board and they had rented an entire resturaunt for the evening.
The gang got really drunk and smashed the place up, and yes there was at least one naked woman "being a serving platter", (I think that's a tone level.)
Not surprisingly he was suffering a bit of cognitive dissonance over this behavior.
Jessie said back then during the conference that he was finishing up his book, and that was in June so I'm assuming any day now.
He did indeed have some titillating tales of caligulaic proportions and I can't wait.
It was Jessie's birthday. And, Miscavige I assume decided to throw him a birthday bash.
He told Jessie they were just going to take him out to dinner. But as they drove down Sunset? Blvd. Jessie saw a whole billboard that said "Happy Birthday Jessie!"
Jessie said he was in awe of it all, having never had such a fuss made about him for a birthday.
But there was more!
Jessie IIRC didn't really name many names of who was there, but all top management were on board and they had rented an entire resturaunt for the evening.
The gang got really drunk and smashed the place up, and yes there was at least one naked woman "being a serving platter", (I think that's a tone level.)
Not surprisingly he was suffering a bit of cognitive dissonance over this behavior.
Jessie said back then during the conference that he was finishing up his book, and that was in June so I'm assuming any day now.
He did indeed have some titillating tales of caligulaic proportions and I can't wait.
WildKat
Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
Is he self-publishing? Can't wait, I know he'll have many fascinating tales to tell.
Is he self-publishing? Can't wait, I know he'll have many fascinating tales to tell.
Victoria
Patron Meritorious
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
Im hoping it comes out within the next couple of months, and then in early 2016 the Dad of Dave book hits the shelves.
This would be awesome.
Yeah, I can't find any new info on it.
Im hoping it comes out within the next couple of months, and then in early 2016 the Dad of Dave book hits the shelves.
This would be awesome.
Victoria
Patron Meritorious
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
A $cientologist graces Art Bell with a clarifying telephone call into his Midnight In The Desert Show. 11/20/15
AB; (Answers line)... Dave, make a point. (Silence) Dave?
Dave; Hi Dave, oh Art. Yes, I was... You caught me unexpected.
AB; Well, when you get through, you hear the audio on Skype, it means you're coming up so better get ready.
Dave; Very good. Ahhh, Um you've had all sorts of people on your show, but maybe you haven't had one of me.
AB; Ok um, I will consider that, why should I have you, you mean as a guest, like a...
Dave; Yeah, or even just as someone you're talking. I'm a $cientologist!
AB; Really? Ummm, isn't there new antibiotic for that?
Dave; Say again?
AB; Nothing.
AB; Go ahead.
Dave; Uhhh, we have it all. The past lives, the body out of body experience, all that stuff which is all covered on your shows. Not so much UFO's but I have some comments on them, if you want.
I'm willing to talk a little bit of shop on all this stuff. So, as they say; "Wanna take a ride?"
AB; Sighing. Weeelll, not a $cientologists ride really, but I'm willing, I wouldn't bar you from talking about it.
Dave; Sure, ummm, specifically, well Uhhh there's an awful lot of stuff that you've talked about that is stuff that WE cover. As far as that goes.
Like uh, like the hypnotist that you talked about that, that you had on a couple of weeks ago that talked about past lives and so on?
AB; Yes?
Dave; The, those tricks that HE used sounds like it's straight out of Dianetics and other related books.
AB; Well who? Yeah but why would you want tricks used on you?
Dave; I-I, no, I'm saying that tricks and stuff that HE used.
Art; Ohhh, that HE used, yeah.
Dave; Yeah.
AB; So similar though to Dianetics, you said.
Dave; Yeah, yeah very similar to that, ummm, I do have a couple small critiques though. For example, you had asked him how do you know if the guy is faking it or not.
AB; Yeah?
Dave; Right?
Dave; The thing is that he said that he used his own ability, spiritual ability to verify that someone was actually looking at something versus making it up.
AB; I prefer another mode, um what you do...
Dave; Yes, exactly!
AB; What you do is you tell the person that you've got hypnotized that they can't feel anything in their leg. And then you start at them with a sewing needle... and pretty quickly you're gonna know if they're really under or not.
Dave; Well, it the, the thing is, is that, that if you grant him the credibility that yeah he could do that?
AB; Yeah?
Dave; Uh, is the thing is, is the ability to have that kind of perception is pretty rare, as far as that goes. Uhhh, and you would basically want a system that ANYone could use, as far as that goes.
Uhhh, and it's, it's so itsa, its...a... similar type of technique, but you're working with the idea of you want people to be more consciously aware be aware of it as far as that goes, instead of going into a oh, a hypnotic trance, as far as that goes.
The other the he use---
AB; You say that a lot, as far as that goes.
Dave; Well. Well, I could go into a lot of DETAIL, but I don't wanna get so technical.
AB; Ohhhh, noooo, no no no don't. Very BROAD brushes please.
Dave; Yeah.
One thing he did not use is a thing called, you'd could call it a canceler, that is a command that says, when you start off at the beginning of session, Uhhh, when I'm done with all the stuff that were talking about, any suggestions that I may have made to you accidentally during the course of our discussion are canceled!
He doesn't use that. And that is kind of a, a critique, and that's a thing that is in
Dianetics.
AB; Alright, well listen-
Dave; As a safeguard!
AB; Were way short on time, and you know, callers can only get so much time. So rather than have the entire Dianetics thing (sounding pained) unveiled in front of us tonight, uh, I think we'll move on for now...and say hello to. Call ended.
So, I hope you guys are clear on Daves important points now!
A $cientologist graces Art Bell with a clarifying telephone call into his Midnight In The Desert Show. 11/20/15
AB; (Answers line)... Dave, make a point. (Silence) Dave?
Dave; Hi Dave, oh Art. Yes, I was... You caught me unexpected.
AB; Well, when you get through, you hear the audio on Skype, it means you're coming up so better get ready.
Dave; Very good. Ahhh, Um you've had all sorts of people on your show, but maybe you haven't had one of me.
AB; Ok um, I will consider that, why should I have you, you mean as a guest, like a...
Dave; Yeah, or even just as someone you're talking. I'm a $cientologist!
AB; Really? Ummm, isn't there new antibiotic for that?
Dave; Say again?
AB; Nothing.
AB; Go ahead.
Dave; Uhhh, we have it all. The past lives, the body out of body experience, all that stuff which is all covered on your shows. Not so much UFO's but I have some comments on them, if you want.
I'm willing to talk a little bit of shop on all this stuff. So, as they say; "Wanna take a ride?"
AB; Sighing. Weeelll, not a $cientologists ride really, but I'm willing, I wouldn't bar you from talking about it.
Dave; Sure, ummm, specifically, well Uhhh there's an awful lot of stuff that you've talked about that is stuff that WE cover. As far as that goes.
Like uh, like the hypnotist that you talked about that, that you had on a couple of weeks ago that talked about past lives and so on?
AB; Yes?
Dave; The, those tricks that HE used sounds like it's straight out of Dianetics and other related books.
AB; Well who? Yeah but why would you want tricks used on you?
Dave; I-I, no, I'm saying that tricks and stuff that HE used.
Art; Ohhh, that HE used, yeah.
Dave; Yeah.
AB; So similar though to Dianetics, you said.
Dave; Yeah, yeah very similar to that, ummm, I do have a couple small critiques though. For example, you had asked him how do you know if the guy is faking it or not.
AB; Yeah?
Dave; Right?
Dave; The thing is that he said that he used his own ability, spiritual ability to verify that someone was actually looking at something versus making it up.
AB; I prefer another mode, um what you do...
Dave; Yes, exactly!
AB; What you do is you tell the person that you've got hypnotized that they can't feel anything in their leg. And then you start at them with a sewing needle... and pretty quickly you're gonna know if they're really under or not.
Dave; Well, it the, the thing is, is that, that if you grant him the credibility that yeah he could do that?
AB; Yeah?
Dave; Uh, is the thing is, is the ability to have that kind of perception is pretty rare, as far as that goes. Uhhh, and you would basically want a system that ANYone could use, as far as that goes.
Uhhh, and it's, it's so itsa, its...a... similar type of technique, but you're working with the idea of you want people to be more consciously aware be aware of it as far as that goes, instead of going into a oh, a hypnotic trance, as far as that goes.
The other the he use---
AB; You say that a lot, as far as that goes.
Dave; Well. Well, I could go into a lot of DETAIL, but I don't wanna get so technical.
AB; Ohhhh, noooo, no no no don't. Very BROAD brushes please.
Dave; Yeah.
One thing he did not use is a thing called, you'd could call it a canceler, that is a command that says, when you start off at the beginning of session, Uhhh, when I'm done with all the stuff that were talking about, any suggestions that I may have made to you accidentally during the course of our discussion are canceled!
He doesn't use that. And that is kind of a, a critique, and that's a thing that is in
Dianetics.
AB; Alright, well listen-
Dave; As a safeguard!
AB; Were way short on time, and you know, callers can only get so much time. So rather than have the entire Dianetics thing (sounding pained) unveiled in front of us tonight, uh, I think we'll move on for now...and say hello to. Call ended.
So, I hope you guys are clear on Daves important points now!
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
..
Cross-Posted from another thread about Tom Cruise giving a cringey Hubbardian pep talk. ("Insane Video of Tom Cruise Speaking Spanish, Opening Madrid Center")
[SUP]1[/SUP] exception (humanitarian deed): By Mr. Cruise's own extraordinary & exemplary actions as a goodwill ambassador for the technology of L. Ron Hubbard--singlehandedly lifting the 4th Dynamic veil of ignorance about Scientology in a manner that brought about its status as the single most rejected, reviled & ridiculed religion on this planet. One must admit, that was sublimely (and inadvertently) humanitarian in the sense that he's been provably instrumental in helping destroy the decidedly anti-humanitarian cult.
..
Cross-Posted from another thread about Tom Cruise giving a cringey Hubbardian pep talk. ("Insane Video of Tom Cruise Speaking Spanish, Opening Madrid Center")
[SUP]1[/SUP] exception (humanitarian deed): By Mr. Cruise's own extraordinary & exemplary actions as a goodwill ambassador for the technology of L. Ron Hubbard--singlehandedly lifting the 4th Dynamic veil of ignorance about Scientology in a manner that brought about its status as the single most rejected, reviled & ridiculed religion on this planet. One must admit, that was sublimely (and inadvertently) humanitarian in the sense that he's been provably instrumental in helping destroy the decidedly anti-humanitarian cult.
Enthetan
Master of Disaster
Re: Top 100 Stupid "Big Lies" in Scientology
In the very early 1980's, when I was at Flag Bureaux, I read the eval on the price increases. The problem was that people had put themselves totally in debt in order to secure their bridges. Even paying credit card rates was seen to be cheaper than not buying now, and having the price be much higher later.
The problem was that management knew that if they STOPPED the price increases, then Gross Income would CRASH. People would no longer have an incentive to take out debt to buy bridge if prices were stable. They would instead work to pay off debt, and take delivery of services already purchased.
Orgs would then be expected to deliver services, on crashed GI.
Nobody really wanted to be the one to suggest "biting the bullet", and stabilize prices, at the cost of months of crashed GI. Even though everybody in management realized that if prices escalated beyond the average Scientologist's ability to pay, that people would just go into despair about it and stop bothering to try to buy services.
In the very early 1980's, when I was at Flag Bureaux, I read the eval on the price increases. The problem was that people had put themselves totally in debt in order to secure their bridges. Even paying credit card rates was seen to be cheaper than not buying now, and having the price be much higher later.
The problem was that management knew that if they STOPPED the price increases, then Gross Income would CRASH. People would no longer have an incentive to take out debt to buy bridge if prices were stable. They would instead work to pay off debt, and take delivery of services already purchased.
Orgs would then be expected to deliver services, on crashed GI.
Nobody really wanted to be the one to suggest "biting the bullet", and stabilize prices, at the cost of months of crashed GI. Even though everybody in management realized that if prices escalated beyond the average Scientologist's ability to pay, that people would just go into despair about it and stop bothering to try to buy services.
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
...
Cross-Posted from another thread discussing the SuperPower Rundown, Ideal Orgs, Old St. Hill, the release of OT IX and OT X....and other things that are magically supposed to "make planetary clearing a reality".
Any time a Scientologist says the words "planetary" or "on this planet", you just know it's going to get really stupid, really fast. LOL
Excellent points!
But that would be sane and sincere, not Scientology. LOL
One of Scientology's greatest successful actions is ambiguity. It provides the necessary wiggle room so that whatever happens, good or bad, the COS can always either:
* (WHEN SOMETHING SUCCEEDS): Take full credit for something they didn't do.
* (WHEN SOMETHING FAILS): Indignantly blame & harshly punish the innocent, the uninvolved or those foolish enough to have complied with policies or senior management's orders.
Hubbard's/Miscavige's grandiose proclamations about the magical requirements to release OT IX, OT X and the other "first real OT levels" are ludicrous on their face.
Example: "All Orgs Old St. Hill Size". Let's assume for a moment that there was an actual spiritual state called an "Operating Thetan" that was "total cause over life". And let's further assume that Scientology's goal of "A Clear Planet" was in fact their goal. Then, the way to achieve that goal would be to create OTs, right? Because OTs can be "total cause" and therefore bring tens or hundreds of millions of new people onto the Bridge, correct? But, that would be sane. Now, let's imagine what an insane person/organization would do that was attempting to sabotage the goal of "A Clear Planet". Their first objective would be to prevent the creation of OTs, right? But they couldn't come right out and say that because Scientologists might possibly sense that there was an outpoint in that. LOL. Instead, Scientology would create a 50-year marketing campaign that essentially said this:
Hey, I didn't say it was sane. This is Scientology we are talking about on this planet, right? LOLOTP (laughing out loud on this planet)
...
Cross-Posted from another thread discussing the SuperPower Rundown, Ideal Orgs, Old St. Hill, the release of OT IX and OT X....and other things that are magically supposed to "make planetary clearing a reality".
Any time a Scientologist says the words "planetary" or "on this planet", you just know it's going to get really stupid, really fast. LOL
Excellent points!
But that would be sane and sincere, not Scientology. LOL
One of Scientology's greatest successful actions is ambiguity. It provides the necessary wiggle room so that whatever happens, good or bad, the COS can always either:
* (WHEN SOMETHING SUCCEEDS): Take full credit for something they didn't do.
--or--
* (WHEN SOMETHING FAILS): Indignantly blame & harshly punish the innocent, the uninvolved or those foolish enough to have complied with policies or senior management's orders.
Example: "All Orgs Old St. Hill Size". Let's assume for a moment that there was an actual spiritual state called an "Operating Thetan" that was "total cause over life". And let's further assume that Scientology's goal of "A Clear Planet" was in fact their goal. Then, the way to achieve that goal would be to create OTs, right? Because OTs can be "total cause" and therefore bring tens or hundreds of millions of new people onto the Bridge, correct? But, that would be sane. Now, let's imagine what an insane person/organization would do that was attempting to sabotage the goal of "A Clear Planet". Their first objective would be to prevent the creation of OTs, right? But they couldn't come right out and say that because Scientologists might possibly sense that there was an outpoint in that. LOL. Instead, Scientology would create a 50-year marketing campaign that essentially said this:
WE DESPERATELY WANT TO CLEAR THE PLANET BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE
AND NUCLEAR WAR OR OTHER COSMIC DISASTERS BEFALL MANKIND.
IN ORDER TO CLEAR THE PLANET WE NEED EXPANSION OF OUR ORGS.
EXPANSION JUST LIKE THE EXPANSION OF OLD ST. HILL IN THE MID-1960S.
THUS, TO ACHIEVE THAT EXPANSION WE WILL NOT
ALLOW ANYONE TO DO THE UPPER OT LEVELS.
BECAUSE OT LEVELS WILL MAKE BEINGS "TOTAL CAUSE" WHICH WOULD
RESULT IN ALL ORGS EXPANDING TO THE SIZE OF OLD ST. HILL.
THEREFORE WE WILL MAKE IT OFF POLICY TO CREATE UPPER LEVEL OTS
AND IMMEDIATELY BEGIN DOING SOMETHING ELSE CALLED "IDEAL ORGS"
AND WE THEN CONVINCE ALL SCIENTOLOGISTS THAT IT IS "IDEAL"
TO NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO ATTAIN THE UPPER OT LEVELS.
AND THEN SCIENTOLOGISTS WILL STAND AND APPLAUD AND EUPHORICALLY
CHEER ABOUT DONATING ENOUGH MONEY TO INSTALL "IDEAL" MARBLE FLOORS IN
THE "IDEAL" ORGS--BECAUSE THAT WILL MAKE PLANETARY CLEARING A REALITY.
AND NUCLEAR WAR OR OTHER COSMIC DISASTERS BEFALL MANKIND.
IN ORDER TO CLEAR THE PLANET WE NEED EXPANSION OF OUR ORGS.
EXPANSION JUST LIKE THE EXPANSION OF OLD ST. HILL IN THE MID-1960S.
THUS, TO ACHIEVE THAT EXPANSION WE WILL NOT
ALLOW ANYONE TO DO THE UPPER OT LEVELS.
BECAUSE OT LEVELS WILL MAKE BEINGS "TOTAL CAUSE" WHICH WOULD
RESULT IN ALL ORGS EXPANDING TO THE SIZE OF OLD ST. HILL.
THEREFORE WE WILL MAKE IT OFF POLICY TO CREATE UPPER LEVEL OTS
AND IMMEDIATELY BEGIN DOING SOMETHING ELSE CALLED "IDEAL ORGS"
AND WE THEN CONVINCE ALL SCIENTOLOGISTS THAT IT IS "IDEAL"
TO NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO ATTAIN THE UPPER OT LEVELS.
AND THEN SCIENTOLOGISTS WILL STAND AND APPLAUD AND EUPHORICALLY
CHEER ABOUT DONATING ENOUGH MONEY TO INSTALL "IDEAL" MARBLE FLOORS IN
THE "IDEAL" ORGS--BECAUSE THAT WILL MAKE PLANETARY CLEARING A REALITY.
Hey, I didn't say it was sane. This is Scientology we are talking about on this planet, right? LOLOTP (laughing out loud on this planet)
Last edited:
Operating DB
Truman Show Dropout
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
LOLOTPASFYS (Laughing out loud on this planet and so forth, you see?)
LOLOTPASFYS (Laughing out loud on this planet and so forth, you see?)
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News *
We interrupt this thread for the following SP Announcement:
There is an opportunity in Present Time to "contribute to the motion" of releasing another Hurricane on Scientology.
Yes, the media outlets are free from fear of Scientology and their fair game tactics....
There is another documentary on Scientology getting created as we speak and you all have the chance to contribute to the motion of enturbulating Scientology and the dick-tator David Miscavige.
You must be a proven SP to participate...:wink2:
(sorry OSA..you will have to wait for the new release....oh, and fuck you).
PM me and I will get you the data.
Remember - only PROVEN, died in the wool, true group member - SP's need apply!!
This ain't no namby pamby panty waist dilletante game we are playing here....
We are taking down the evil cult of Scientology.
All Lives Matter!
Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News * Breaking News *
We interrupt this thread for the following SP Announcement:
There is an opportunity in Present Time to "contribute to the motion" of releasing another Hurricane on Scientology.
Yes, the media outlets are free from fear of Scientology and their fair game tactics....
There is another documentary on Scientology getting created as we speak and you all have the chance to contribute to the motion of enturbulating Scientology and the dick-tator David Miscavige.
You must be a proven SP to participate...:wink2:
(sorry OSA..you will have to wait for the new release....oh, and fuck you).
PM me and I will get you the data.
Remember - only PROVEN, died in the wool, true group member - SP's need apply!!
This ain't no namby pamby panty waist dilletante game we are playing here....
We are taking down the evil cult of Scientology.
All Lives Matter!
Last edited:
Karen#1
Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
I have Cathy's permission to cross post
It probably should go on Cathy's thread but there is so much utter stupidity here that I am compelled to post here.
FRIENDS DONT MAKE FRIENDS DE-FRIEND FRIENDS ON FACEBOOK “THINK FOR YOURSELF”
It probably should go on Cathy's thread but there is so much utter stupidity here that I am compelled to post here.
FRIENDS DONT MAKE FRIENDS DE-FRIEND FRIENDS ON FACEBOOK “THINK FOR YOURSELF”
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
The wacky-wacky world that Scientologists live in!
I loved that your post captured the essence of stupid with with that Scn jingle headline "THINK FOR YOURSELF" LOLOL
Just "A DAY IN THE LIFE" of a hyper-obedient Scientology zombie who gives up lifelong friends, abandons their own parents/spouse or disconnects from their own children on the slightest whim or rumor of someone being "Declared" or (gasp!) "Not in Good Standing", lol.
I have Cathy's permission to cross post
It probably should go on Cathy's thread but there is so much utter stupidity here that I am compelled to post here.
FRIENDS DONT MAKE FRIENDS DE-FRIEND FRIENDS ON FACEBOOK
“THINK FOR YOURSELF”
The wacky-wacky world that Scientologists live in!
I loved that your post captured the essence of stupid with with that Scn jingle headline "THINK FOR YOURSELF" LOLOL
Just "A DAY IN THE LIFE" of a hyper-obedient Scientology zombie who gives up lifelong friends, abandons their own parents/spouse or disconnects from their own children on the slightest whim or rumor of someone being "Declared" or (gasp!) "Not in Good Standing", lol.
I read the Declares today, oh boy
About a lucky man who did the grades
And though the disconnections were rather sad
Well I just had to laugh
I saw the text messages
He blew his friends off in a flash
He didn't notice that the times had changed
A crowd of internet users sat and stared
They'd seen his case before
Nobody was really sure
If he was OT or DB
I saw a Scientology film today oh boy
The Salvation Navy had just Cleared the Planet
A crowd of NCGs turned away
But I just had to look
Having read Ron's book
I'd love to help you blow....
About a lucky man who did the grades
And though the disconnections were rather sad
Well I just had to laugh
I saw the text messages
He blew his friends off in a flash
He didn't notice that the times had changed
A crowd of internet users sat and stared
They'd seen his case before
Nobody was really sure
If he was OT or DB
I saw a Scientology film today oh boy
The Salvation Navy had just Cleared the Planet
A crowd of NCGs turned away
But I just had to look
Having read Ron's book
I'd love to help you blow....
Last edited:
Anonycat
Crusader
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
Thank you, Karen. It really shows proof that not only disconnection is a huge part of "being in", but also that the lines are blurred between a formal SP declare and "not in good standing". And what a crazy game of having to get orders from an Org, that you can no longer be Facebook friends or in any way be connected or talk to someone. And to take the crazy to an even higher level, she's suggesting a wild goose chase of disconnection examples! If that note she sent wasn't enough to make anyone quit the cult, I don't know what would! All the "what ifs" that lead to disconnection!
Edit: And leave all those thousands with us, just in case.
Thousands of dollars in our hands, for pre-paid classes you don't want to take = you get to keep your family.
Thank you, Karen. It really shows proof that not only disconnection is a huge part of "being in", but also that the lines are blurred between a formal SP declare and "not in good standing". And what a crazy game of having to get orders from an Org, that you can no longer be Facebook friends or in any way be connected or talk to someone. And to take the crazy to an even higher level, she's suggesting a wild goose chase of disconnection examples! If that note she sent wasn't enough to make anyone quit the cult, I don't know what would! All the "what ifs" that lead to disconnection!
Edit: And leave all those thousands with us, just in case.
Thousands of dollars in our hands, for pre-paid classes you don't want to take = you get to keep your family.
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
xx
Scieno-Scenario: A Scientologist gets routed to the "Ethics" department.
xx
Scieno-Scenario: A Scientologist gets routed to the "Ethics" department.
ETHICS OFFICER
I have a Knowledge Report here that one of your
family members is invalidating your wins.
SCIENTOLOGIST
Wuttt? I don't know what you're talking about.
Let me see the report.
ETHICS OFFICER
Well, I can't do that because it is from OSA
and their lines are confidential. But someone
in OSA actually overheard the conversation
where a family member came in the Ideal Org
and said very loudly that --and I quote:
"SCIENTOLOGY IS VERY STUPID!"
SCIENTOLOGIST
LOL, are you serious? That was
my daughter that said that.
ETHICS OFFICER
Is your daughter on lines here?
SCIENTOLOGIST
No, she was with my wife who
was picking me up from course.
They came in the org and had
to wait a really long time because
I got pulled into a reg cycle and they
wouldn't let me out of the room.
ETHICS OFFICER
Is your wife in agreement with the entheta
your daughter is putting on org lines?
SCIENTOLOGIST
No, my wife is on on course here weekends
and also getting auditing as a paid PC.
ETHICS OFFICER
I see. Well then, you need to disconnect from your daughter.
SCIENTOLOGIST
LOL, she's only 4 years old, she was
getting bored waiting. She's a little kid for God's sake!
ETHICS OFFICER
Ron states that there are no little kids. They are trillion
old thetans in small bodies. It sounds like you
are being very reasonable about the suppression.
I am giving you 48 hours to disconnect.
SCIENTOLOGIST
This is madness! She hasn't been Declared an
SP, right? Why should I have to disconnect from her?
ETHICS OFFICER
Well, if she hasn't been declared, then she is, minimally,
not in good standing as a Scientologist.
SCIENTOLOGIST
Where does it say that? Where is that written?
ETHICS OFFICER
It doesn't say it anywhere. I'm just saying...
SCIENTOLOGIST
Just saying? What ever happened to Ron stating
that "...if it's not written it's not true!"?
ETHICS OFFICER
Now you are violating another LRH policy...
"Using Policy to Stop"
SCIENTOLOGIST
Wuttttt? Stop what?
ETHICS OFFICER
Stop me from giving you verbal data
to disconnect from your daughter.
I have a Knowledge Report here that one of your
family members is invalidating your wins.
SCIENTOLOGIST
Wuttt? I don't know what you're talking about.
Let me see the report.
ETHICS OFFICER
Well, I can't do that because it is from OSA
and their lines are confidential. But someone
in OSA actually overheard the conversation
where a family member came in the Ideal Org
and said very loudly that --and I quote:
"SCIENTOLOGY IS VERY STUPID!"
SCIENTOLOGIST
LOL, are you serious? That was
my daughter that said that.
ETHICS OFFICER
Is your daughter on lines here?
SCIENTOLOGIST
No, she was with my wife who
was picking me up from course.
They came in the org and had
to wait a really long time because
I got pulled into a reg cycle and they
wouldn't let me out of the room.
ETHICS OFFICER
Is your wife in agreement with the entheta
your daughter is putting on org lines?
SCIENTOLOGIST
No, my wife is on on course here weekends
and also getting auditing as a paid PC.
ETHICS OFFICER
I see. Well then, you need to disconnect from your daughter.
SCIENTOLOGIST
LOL, she's only 4 years old, she was
getting bored waiting. She's a little kid for God's sake!
ETHICS OFFICER
Ron states that there are no little kids. They are trillion
old thetans in small bodies. It sounds like you
are being very reasonable about the suppression.
I am giving you 48 hours to disconnect.
SCIENTOLOGIST
This is madness! She hasn't been Declared an
SP, right? Why should I have to disconnect from her?
ETHICS OFFICER
Well, if she hasn't been declared, then she is, minimally,
not in good standing as a Scientologist.
SCIENTOLOGIST
Where does it say that? Where is that written?
ETHICS OFFICER
It doesn't say it anywhere. I'm just saying...
SCIENTOLOGIST
Just saying? What ever happened to Ron stating
that "...if it's not written it's not true!"?
ETHICS OFFICER
Now you are violating another LRH policy...
"Using Policy to Stop"
SCIENTOLOGIST
Wuttttt? Stop what?
ETHICS OFFICER
Stop me from giving you verbal data
to disconnect from your daughter.
Karen#1
Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
Great work by Mike Rinder, Gary Jackson Morehead and Sinar Parman, for some great revelations to the Daily Mail.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...vige-secretly-recorded-movie-star.htm[/SIZE]l
Great work by Mike Rinder, Gary Jackson Morehead and Sinar Parman, for some great revelations to the Daily Mail.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...vige-secretly-recorded-movie-star.htm[/SIZE]l
Karen#1
Gold Meritorious Patron
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
The Cult of Scientology in the biggest "most dense"population of Scientologists (Los Angeles) is reduced to level of Hare Krishna at airports, or Jehovah's Witnesses knocking on your door. These shots taken a couple of days ago.
It is *LURING* in off the streets and these hospital guests could be at a vulnerable moment in their lives..
On the corners of Sunset and Vermont soliciting staff and public of Children's Hospital and Kaiser hospital. This is 8 hours a day.
Recently all these Body Routers "changed." No data on what happened to the previous crew.
3rd image is pc and auditor doing "Survival Rundown" on the street.
It is *LURING* in off the streets and these hospital guests could be at a vulnerable moment in their lives..
On the corners of Sunset and Vermont soliciting staff and public of Children's Hospital and Kaiser hospital. This is 8 hours a day.
Recently all these Body Routers "changed." No data on what happened to the previous crew.
3rd image is pc and auditor doing "Survival Rundown" on the street.
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Top 100 Stupid Admin Tech Moments in Scientology
..
Perfect!
Dozens of "BODY ROUTERS" working around the clock.
Still, for unknown reasons, the Ideal Org simply cannot interest anyone in spending $500,000 to receive two (2) pieces of papers. An OT certificate and (shortly thereafter) an SP Declare.
That photo pretty much says EVERYTHING there is to know about org staff members. . .those supernaturally powerful OTs who are making it go right to clear this mudball.
THE CAST
THE SCRIPT
..
--snipped--The Cult of Scientology in the biggest "most dense"population of Scientologists (Los Angeles) is reduced to level of Hare Krishna at airports, or Jehovah's Witnesses knocking on your door. These shots taken a couple of days ago.
It is *LURING* in off the streets and these hospital guests could be at a vulnerable moment in their lives..
On the corners of Sunset and Vermont soliciting staff and public of Children's Hospital and Kaiser hospital. This is 8 hours a day.
......
Perfect!
Dozens of "BODY ROUTERS" working around the clock.
Still, for unknown reasons, the Ideal Org simply cannot interest anyone in spending $500,000 to receive two (2) pieces of papers. An OT certificate and (shortly thereafter) an SP Declare.
That photo pretty much says EVERYTHING there is to know about org staff members. . .those supernaturally powerful OTs who are making it go right to clear this mudball.
THE CAST
DOWNSTAT BODY REG: 14 year old Central American girl who has been on staff two weeks. They closed her on signing a billion year contract by convincing her that when she got paid each week she would be able to buy tons of designer clothes--and still have plenty of money left over to wire back to her family in Honduras.
SENIOR EXEC: Work experience prior to Sea Org was a part-time job as Walmart clerk in the sprinkler and garden hose section. Been in the SO 24 years. Highest training level attained--FEBC Product Officer mini hat. Highest auditing level attained--Grade III (bogged on Grade IV for 7 years, while waiting for an available auditor who knows how to handle Service Facs)
HCO MUSCLE: Main duty, to tag along with Senior Exec for additional "ethics presence" which he gains by never saying a word and gazing off into the distance with an vaguely annoyed expression. In fact, being from Uzbekistan, he doesn't actually even speak or understand a word of English.
SENIOR EXEC: Work experience prior to Sea Org was a part-time job as Walmart clerk in the sprinkler and garden hose section. Been in the SO 24 years. Highest training level attained--FEBC Product Officer mini hat. Highest auditing level attained--Grade III (bogged on Grade IV for 7 years, while waiting for an available auditor who knows how to handle Service Facs)
HCO MUSCLE: Main duty, to tag along with Senior Exec for additional "ethics presence" which he gains by never saying a word and gazing off into the distance with an vaguely annoyed expression. In fact, being from Uzbekistan, he doesn't actually even speak or understand a word of English.
THE SCRIPT
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
Oh, but Miss Judy, I working so hard
15 hours each day. But the people--they
no interested in Mister Hubbard. I try
tell them about a bridge to freedom
but they laugh and don't take my
free movie ticket.
SENIOR EXEC
I don't want to hear your goddamn justifications
any more. This is the third time I've
had t come down here today and
you still haven't body routed one
fucking person into the org all day.
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
I try so hard Miss Judy. But...
SENIOR EXEC
But nothing. You've either got MU's
or you've got fucking counter intention!
Which is it?
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
I don't know. Whichever you think is best, Miss Judy.
SENIOR EXEC
Do you even know what is going to happen
to this planet if you don't get more fucking
bodies in the shop?
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
Yes, you told me before Miss Judy. The whole
planet, she is blow up and everybody dead.
SENIOR EXEC
Is that what you want?
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
No Miss Judy. I no want.
SENIOR EXEC
Okay, then take your fucking postulates out
of your ass and start using them! And
do whatever you have to do to make it go right!
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
How I can make it go right, Miss Judy?
SENIOR EXEC
Well do something! You can start by
unbuttoning your uniform's top 2 cocksucking buttons
and smile and pretend you like them, like we drilled.
Oh, but Miss Judy, I working so hard
15 hours each day. But the people--they
no interested in Mister Hubbard. I try
tell them about a bridge to freedom
but they laugh and don't take my
free movie ticket.
SENIOR EXEC
I don't want to hear your goddamn justifications
any more. This is the third time I've
had t come down here today and
you still haven't body routed one
fucking person into the org all day.
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
I try so hard Miss Judy. But...
SENIOR EXEC
But nothing. You've either got MU's
or you've got fucking counter intention!
Which is it?
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
I don't know. Whichever you think is best, Miss Judy.
SENIOR EXEC
Do you even know what is going to happen
to this planet if you don't get more fucking
bodies in the shop?
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
Yes, you told me before Miss Judy. The whole
planet, she is blow up and everybody dead.
SENIOR EXEC
Is that what you want?
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
No Miss Judy. I no want.
SENIOR EXEC
Okay, then take your fucking postulates out
of your ass and start using them! And
do whatever you have to do to make it go right!
DOWNSTAT BODY REG
How I can make it go right, Miss Judy?
SENIOR EXEC
Well do something! You can start by
unbuttoning your uniform's top 2 cocksucking buttons
and smile and pretend you like them, like we drilled.
Jump
Operating teatime
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
Art department is ready with the poster collateral on this planet, Sir.
We're still undecided, either "the original nightmare that threatened the world" or "saving the planet with mankind's greatest friend".
Can you check the spelling of 'insouciance of the body routers' please? I know the graphic of people rushing into the orgs to pay for services is really theta.
Art department is ready with the poster collateral on this planet, Sir.
We're still undecided, either "the original nightmare that threatened the world" or "saving the planet with mankind's greatest friend".
Can you check the spelling of 'insouciance of the body routers' please? I know the graphic of people rushing into the orgs to pay for services is really theta.
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
..
Cross-Posted from a thread about a Scientology grandmother who disconnected from her grandchildren.
SCIENTOLOGY PARADOX #497:
--The highest ethics condition a Scientologist can attain is "POWER".
--Ron's first law of Power is: "Don't Disconnect"
--Therefore Scientologists wishing to remain in Power never disconnect! Unless someone
disagrees with Ron, in which case the Scientologist is promptly ordered to Disconnect (in
order to remain in Power).
Scientologists see nothing even slightly unusual about this because of Hubbard's Law of Commotion[SUP]*[/SUP].
[SUP]*[/SUP] Hubbard's Law of Commotion: A curious cultic corollary of Newton's 3rd Law of Motion, stating that: For each and every Scientology policy, code or piece of tech--there is an equal and opposite policy, code or piece of tech.
..
Cross-Posted from a thread about a Scientology grandmother who disconnected from her grandchildren.
SCIENTOLOGY PARADOX #497:
--The highest ethics condition a Scientologist can attain is "POWER".
--Ron's first law of Power is: "Don't Disconnect"
--Therefore Scientologists wishing to remain in Power never disconnect! Unless someone
disagrees with Ron, in which case the Scientologist is promptly ordered to Disconnect (in
order to remain in Power).
Scientologists see nothing even slightly unusual about this because of Hubbard's Law of Commotion[SUP]*[/SUP].
[SUP]*[/SUP] Hubbard's Law of Commotion: A curious cultic corollary of Newton's 3rd Law of Motion, stating that: For each and every Scientology policy, code or piece of tech--there is an equal and opposite policy, code or piece of tech.
HelluvaHoax!
Platinum Meritorious Sponsor with bells on
Re: Top 100 Stupid Moments in Scientology
...
Also Cross-Posted from that thread, where the OT Grandmother disconnected from her grandchildren. She also mentioned that she had dutifully waited for her "ethics officer" to render a ruling whether she had permission to send her own grandchildren Birthday Cards once a year.
...
Even though we all know too well the delusions & insanities of Scientology, this story is still shocking.
But there is a silver lining and good news after all. OSA has approved birthday cards to be sent to the grandkids.
OSA APPROVED BIRTHDAY CARD:
Dear Timmy,
Happy Birthday darling grandson!
I wish i could have sent a present
along with this birthday card, but
I got crammed on the LRH references
on out-exchange and criminals and had
some really huge wins on how totally spun
in and psychotic you now are. Sure, I know
you are only 7 years old but you are a
4 quadrillion year old being who should know
better than to sabotage Ron's 'world without insanity'
WTF were you thinking to blow Scientology?! Dear, I still
postulate that you come to your senses and knock
off your fucking DB case dramatization!
I mean, get a fucking sec check you little
out ethics cocksucking SP!
I mean that in a theta way.
Much Love,
Grandma
...
Also Cross-Posted from that thread, where the OT Grandmother disconnected from her grandchildren. She also mentioned that she had dutifully waited for her "ethics officer" to render a ruling whether she had permission to send her own grandchildren Birthday Cards once a year.
...
Even though we all know too well the delusions & insanities of Scientology, this story is still shocking.
But there is a silver lining and good news after all. OSA has approved birthday cards to be sent to the grandkids.
OSA APPROVED BIRTHDAY CARD:
Dear Timmy,
Happy Birthday darling grandson!
I wish i could have sent a present
along with this birthday card, but
I got crammed on the LRH references
on out-exchange and criminals and had
some really huge wins on how totally spun
in and psychotic you now are. Sure, I know
you are only 7 years old but you are a
4 quadrillion year old being who should know
better than to sabotage Ron's 'world without insanity'
WTF were you thinking to blow Scientology?! Dear, I still
postulate that you come to your senses and knock
off your fucking DB case dramatization!
I mean, get a fucking sec check you little
out ethics cocksucking SP!
I mean that in a theta way.
Much Love,
Grandma
Last edited:
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