trepidatious

CB, I like you, but I think it's time you had your meds adjusted.

brilliant!

i've been getting by on short rations of nicotine and pot so...

rum, crack, the wholesome refreshing goodness of crystal methedrine and some lsd

plus...

a batshit crazy bluesed-out junkie artist punker chick

i told her "you don't know how comfortable this bed is" she said "sure i know, i sleep in it" i said "yeah. you do. i've been sleeping on the sidewalk"


p.s. thanx cowboy...
 
Phil Valinsky dying in session at SU and the contortions to hide the truth... and then seeing a copy of his official granting of 21 years of leave, with orders to report back to duty in his new body... I remember thinking how come he got 21 years to live childhood in his new body before reporting back to duty, yet I started working at about 12. He get's a childhood and I don't? BTW, did Phil ever report back in his new body?
What does SU mean? Mimsey
 

uncover

Gold Meritorious Patron
What does SU mean? Mimsey
SU = Special Unit

From Aug 5, 2012:
http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?27909-trepidatious&p=714247&viewfull=1#post714247
cowboy said:
Veda said:
....
SU? "SU" doesn't ring a bell. Please explain "SU."
....
SU is Special Unit. Top of the CMO echelon. This would have been around 77. Average age of the messengers, 16 or 17 I'd say.

From the first post of this thread:
http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthread.php?27909-trepidatious&p=707202&viewfull=1#post707202
cowboy said:
Many years ago, within the structure of the C of S, Flag was paramount. But removed and cloaked in secrecy was the special unit, hidden in various places, primarily southern Calif. .....
 

Enthetan

Master of Disaster

Expanding upon this a bit, in late 70's/early 80's, Flag ( Flag Bureau plus ED Int and Int Strata) was perceived by lower orgs as being the top of the command hierarchy. But EVERY order coming out of Flag had to be submitted "uplines" through the "Authority & Verification Unit" (AVU) for approval before going out to the field.

The purpose of Flag was to appear to be in control, while shielding perception that LRH (via the CMO) still exercised control.

ADDING: about that time, we had CMO units located in the FOLOs (Flag Operations Liaison Office, located in each continent to manage the orgs in their continent) , I assume to keep an eye on the "official" command lines through the FOLO.
 

AnonKat

Crusader
Many years ago, within the structure of the C of S, Flag was paramount. But removed and cloaked in secrecy was the special unit, hidden in various places, primarily southern Calif. However, removed and hidden from those at the special unit was a series of smaller bases, where Hubbard worked with a trusted few. Many of their names are known. Some are not.

I spent thousands of hours over many years in daily contact with the man. I experienced first hand more than most could even imagine.

Only the very tip of the iceberg is talked about here.

Few can truly understand what went on in the final days.

I'm still uncertain if I want to even discuss it.

In Scientology onley 1 guy gets all the presents:


oibyT.jpg
 

dchoiceisalwaysrs

Gold Meritorious Patron
There is so much in this thread. I just had to read some of it over again. This is is why the RTC and other Scientology entities fight so hard in court. They don't want the truth out. This is their Fair Game practice and now since it is not working well they are using staff contracts to completely shut off any negative information from coming out of scientology organizations.

Thanks for the question. What did I get from Ron? An insight into, in my mind, the nature of religions and deification of normal people. What people do to fill the "God sized hole" that some religions teach, perhaps correctly, that we all have. How crazy it was that numerous people could all see the same thing, draw the same conclusion, but refuse to voice it to one another. After all, they didn't want to be the odd man out. Everyone else says it... so it must be true.

I spent thousands of hours with him, most of them alone. I saw him strong and scathing, and as frail as a cat, needing help getting out of bed and going to the restroom. I saw him so weak he couldn't speak above a whisper, forced to use a bed pan, unable to remember every day details about conversations or things he had written only weeks earlier. I saw the myth people imagined, contrasted with the reality of the aging, largely demented man I saw almost daily.

I also saw moments of insight. Brilliance. I learned how to communicate. How to shoulder responsibility greater than that most people had at my age. My vocabulary grew. I learned how to live in an adult world, as a teenager. I learned from others the dedication that normal people could have, the sacrifices that they could make, in their desire to make the world a better place. I learned of all the human characteristics, those good, and those not, played out in the soap opera of his life.

I learned apologetics, how to foster belief, skirting lying, but not giving all the truth to those who followed his every word. How to twist facts to avoid uncomfortable truths.

I learned who was not the creator of Scn, but of a man who had learned how to delegate, wield a whip, place the carrot in front of people (OT), and the stick of expulsion, or eternal damnation.

I learned how myths were created, which gave me a tremendous insight to human nature and the rendition of historic events and what might have actually been the truth of those historic events.

I saw selflessness, a true inspiration to me, of those around him.

I saw children with adult like determination, who gladly donated their childhood. And I saw other children crying, shells of what a child should be, craving attention from their parents who couldn't be with them because they were busy trying to save the world.

I felt comradry. The bliss of being in a unit striving to make a difference. While blinded for years that the goal didn't mesh with the reality. Is this, I wondered, how the followers of Hitler might have been blinded to, or justify the heinous actions of their group? How could children disconnect from their parents who had raised them? How could a husband watch a wife in rags in the RPF? Tolerate weekly time with their children measured in minutes?

I learned the definition of the blind following the blind.

I understood how it was that people, and whole groups, could use the end to justify the means, whatever harm might be caused by the means.

I learned what it was to be human. To live life in the now.

Now, as I've spoken outside of this forum to a few who were in the trenches with me, I feel like a survivor of Aushwitz, or one of the few surviving soldiers of an epic battle, knowing, as we look at one another, that there is truly no way to communicate to those who were not there exactly what we experienced.

And most of all, I learned to hold up every philosophy, every tenet, polictics, every conclusion, to the cold, clear light of unbiased reason, rather than blind faith.

I saw the aged die, for lack of medical care. The elite of Scn with teeth rotting in their mouths for lack of money to receive dental care. I saw people gap toothed but smiling, proud of yanking their own teeth.

I saw the frailty of those who had dedicated their lives to a false dream reach the realization that the dream was false, but they could not extricate themselves, for they had nothing. No social security. No resume. No health insurance. Lives that were largely unimaginable to the vast majority of people outside the church.

I saw modern slavery.

It is difficult to try to explain the emotions that I still experience as I recall these things.

Thanks. I believe that, after this weekend, I'll be fading away again. But maybe, some day, I'll check in again.

Wow, quite a load of questions. You're making me earn my keep.

Self doubts. Yes. He struggled, realizing that not only was the damn breaking and he finding out that others weren't getting gains like he promoted, leading him to develop the next level, but none of the old tech, or new stuff was doing a bit of good on his own case. He was physically ill from many issues, as well as memory issues. He leaned on others to find tech answers, using the principals of Scn, and save him. The only trouble was the underlying foundation of tech didn't work. There were no clears. There were no OTs. He'd blame others wherever possible. Even when it came to his case. Everyone that has ever audited or CSed him is out. So they were easy targets.

About future levels, when I left the old man had discussed several other upper levels, to be further developed later. Unfortunately, the fact that old standbys like Dianetics wasn't working pushed development in the direction of redoing Dntcs (NED) then NOTS, etc.

For years he had no idea what OT 8 should be.

Re: List One; Paulette was the scapegoat. The real flaw was meters. They were being changed, tinkered with, "upgraded". The meter of the day was different than ones of the past. It behaved differently. Paulette did nothing wrong. She's a great lady. I believe the fact that he was not getting case gain himself with her as his CS made it easier to blame it all on her. Paulette was absolutely innocent. Period.

Was he a true believer, well, yes, in the order of things as he'd structured it, OTs, BTs, Engrams, etc. sure. However, did he believe that he had processes that could achieve results he'd promised? I don't believe so. He would never have admitted it. But I have some evidence that he knew his premises just weren't shaking out.

You see, tech makes sense. It's logical. However it doesn't prove out. Doing everything Hubbard said doesn't deliver the promised results. So any new tech that others were writing in his name was based on flawed principals and thus it didn't produce results either. There were good and bad bulletin writers. Mayo was awesome. Wonderful, well intentioned man. Soothing. Tech might not work, but just his calmness, his listening, his sympathy alone was enough to help Hubbard through some of his worse times.

Hubbard knew there were no clears, or OTs, not in the sense of the word he promoted.

Well, there's a few crumbs....

It is my personal, first hand knowledge that in the early 70's EL Ron was contemptuous of CL VI Org Execs/Staffs/CS's, SO Execs/Staffs/CS's, and early Dianaticists and Scns that were still around.

EDIT: KSW was trotted out (Reissued) off and on as one of the Program Targets from yet another of a series of El Ron "Eval's" over the years aimed at "Fixing Everything".

Face:)

:biggrin:

I've written about the following a bit before on ESMB.

I got into Scn in a time, place and situation wherein I was able to chat about El Ron, the "Tech" and the Early Days with "Old Timers"...Julia Salmon, Verne Townsend, Don Breeding to name a few. Very early on I knew that the "Tech had been worked out backwards" and through conversations with "Old Timers", the fact that I was a voracious and curious reader, and naively/honestly thought I needed to understand the "Old Days" to fully Grok Scn and "OT", I began a private personal "quest" to know and understand just how all "This" happened and, as best I could, to understand and appreciate what it was like for El Ron to walk in the magic "Boots in the Sky" and how Hisself found "Them".

Over my years on the Apollo and personal interaction with El Ron I realized that Hisself did not act like and was NOT the "OT" I had envisioned, read about in Hisself's works and heard stories about from others. But, for some reason, I kept thinking that there was, or some day would be, "Pie in the Sky". As I look back on it now, what reaffirmed and reinforced Scn to me during those years was my respect, interaction and adoration of many--but not all--of my fellow Crew/Scns, the here and there "Wins" I'd had and my personal desire to "be a better person", help others be "happier" and be part of the foundation for something "Good" that would "Change the World".

face:)
 

AnonKat

Crusader
The real truth about Xenu and "touch assists" as told by L Ron Hubbard

[video=youtube;8hB7KJYIBwc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hB7KJYIBwc[/video]
 

Free Being Me

Crusader
why doesn't someone gather cowboy's writings like this...

it wasn't to memorialize face, it was to make cowboy's body of writing readily accessible

i'm toulouse low tekk face and don't know how to take posts thread to thread but perhaps i'll learn as i have had many thoughts of what an editor might do with these writings...

a well edited "best of helluvahox"; he's always readable but his best stuff can be gutbuster

the Fing here is being done by the-poster-who-may-not-be named who recognizes gathering cowboy' stuff will be thought a boon to many and said poster does not wan anyone to think well of commander birdsong, his writing and his work

who of course soured the affection between you and i saying i had viciously attacked you when i had id in so many words "m'lady doth protest too much" in that you have lived quite well

While I agree this is an important and valuable thread all you're accomplishing is filling the recent post section burying other posts. The thread is already available for all to read in context with other people's posts sharing their input.

*Pro-tip: Multiquote is there for a reason.

I'm not responsible for your decisions and actions. Blaming me for them is hilarious. In fact now that I ponder another See-BS escapade to dilute ESMB with meaningless recent post filler, I doubt you're aware of your decisions and actions either. Such is the life of an OT
 
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I'm not responsible for your decisions and actions. Blaming me is for them is hilarious. In fact now that I ponder another See-BS escapade to dilute ESMB with meaningless recent post filler, I doubt you're aware of your decisions and actions either. Such is the life of an OT

?????

can the first sentence be deciphered?
 

Free Being Me

Crusader
I think capturing Cowboy's stuff in one place is a great idea. However, I wouldn't want Commander BS to be my "Editor" (although he personally sees himself as being a Literary Genius) and it certainly is, IMHO, very disrespectful of Cowboy to F around like this with his Thread.

I really don't know whether or not Cowboy will return. He's very busy and has said all he feels comfortable saying at this point.

I've reported this activity to the Mod's and it's up to them to decide what to do. I'd like to see this thread cleaned up and the more than 40 Posts BS has posted in the last few hours be put in a new Thread where BS can put whatever he wants from this Thread and others can participate if they so wish.

Face:)

:thumbsup:
 
While I agree this is an important and valuable thread all you're accomplishing is filling the recent post section burying other posts. The thread is already available for all to read in context with other people's posts sharing their input.

*Pro-tip: Multiquote is there for a reason.

TSTO...

the entire thread remains there in context for those who would read it so

but to gather all of cowboy's posts gives those new to the thread a great introduction to it and many of those who have been here all along will enjoy seeing his recent exceptionally well written posts in the light of his entire body of work and can have as well a research tool

boy that's a good one...

launching an assault on the pretext that if a condensed version is produced the original will disappear...

well...

no one can say you aren't spirited and persistent
 

Free Being Me

Crusader
TSTO...

the entire thread remains there in context for those who would read it so

but to gather all of cowboy's posts gives those new to the thread a great introduction to it and many of those who have been here all along will enjoy seeing his recent exceptionally well written posts in the light of his entire body of work and can have as well a research tool

boy that's a good one...

launching an assault on the pretext that if a condensed version is produced the original will disappear...

well...

no one can say you aren't spirited and persistent

I never said it was a bad idea so the assault (what a drama filled illusion) is nonexistent. You're spamming the recent post section and this thread burying other people's posts. Collectivize as you will with multiquote on a new thread. Problem solved. Rewriting people's personal history to fit your image of Elcon seems to be your passion.
 
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I never said it was a bad idea so the assault (what a drama filled illusion) is nonexistent. You're spamming the recent post section and this thread burying other people's posts. Collectivize as you will with multiquote on a new thread. Problem solved. Rewriting people's personal history to fit your image of Elcon seems to be your passion.

no...

there is no assault here; certainly not...

obviously commander birdsong is rewriting people's personal histories to fit his own image of ron so it is not an assault to state this obvious fact

however...

i have no idea what you mean by "rewriting" as i was merely collecting the entirety of cowboys posts (not my own favorites. the posse comitatus appealing to the moderator impressed him to erroneously title the new thread as my favorites so as to publish their false charges). my passions include graceful and intelligent women, baseball, harley davidsons, the haight ashbury literary journal, ("drinking platonic absinthe in a wildfire mannequin of argentine cafes i range the moccasin rose for seven jackknives to fiddlestick my golden owl out his rhetoric complex" gary johnston) and auditing

now as you know how to do multi-posts (certainly highly preferable to hitting rwq on each post as i was doing) and you didn't say it wasn't a good idea why don't you do it?

indeed, if you will notice, i began this thing with cowboy's OP and the question "why doesn't someone..." and then started doing it to the best of my ability...

so...

taking what is known in our trade as "personal responsibility" i figured either i would gather cowboy's body of writing...

or...

someone would say it can be done much better

which is TRUE!!!

so...

perhaps you or someone will do it better
 
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