What's wrong with this Scientology Ad?

[Infinite]

Dear (Hoax),

Right now I have the last Ruby Red E-Meter for sale. It is a nice, shiny metal red with gold trim . . . <snip for brevity> . . . And they all lived happily ever after until the next day, when the IAS came into town and had to turn Bill into a Patron Meritorious with 8 maxed out credit cards and no assets. They did it though. Until next time.....

The End

Hehehehehehe!!!

 

[Feral]

This is a piercingly true and hysterically funny thread!

It made me remember that just before the new quantum VII meter was released there was a massive push to sell the collector edition signed mark VIs.

I smell a new meter coming. You know, sniff, sniff, it smells like......horseshit!

 

[Nicole]

This is a piercingly true and hysterically funny thread!

It made me remember that just before the new quantum VII meter was released there was a massive push to sell the collector edition signed mark VIs.

I smell a new meter coming. You know, sniff, sniff, it smells like......horseshit!

There it is:

The very exclusive Yellow Black version is $10,200 (plus 9.75% sales tax if delivered inside CA).

 

[Nicole]

I forget to mention that the package includes:

and BLiPs wonderfull book:

 

[Ogsonofgroo]

Deep-fried Jebus onna crutch Hoaxy they had me at 'To make this easy...' (what, they didn't offer to help ya get a line of credit backed by your sterling personality? wtf!)
Orly?


It a joke? Right?

Now, the icing would be for several others who got this blarge to post their "It be de lastest one evah!" e-mails.

Me just shakin' my head inbetween mirthful laughters!

 

[SchwimmelPuckel]

WTF!? - A towel!!??

The guy who made this ad is an undercover mole SP hiding out in Scientology's marketing office!

That towel is a blatant hint that 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy' is the real cosmology and Space Opera.. Which implies that Hubbard's cosmology is rubbish and make believe.. We all know this of course, but to see subliminal advertizing right there in Scientology's official material is shocking, to say the least!

Another possibility is that this is just a lame attempt from Scientology to lure galactic hitchhikers to take a towel with a scientology logo on it. Which would be a horribly evil thing to do! -Just think of the bureaucratic difficuties the poor hitchhiker would get entagled in if the Vogon's ever saw that! - Why he'd risk having Vogon poetry read to him until his untimely death!

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

It a joke? Right?

All depends....

The spam email ain't no joke, it's a verbatim copy of what I received in my inbox today.

But, people buying this useless gadget to navigate a non-existent bridge which pretends to erase make-believe charge and fictional bts---that's no joke either. It's the PUNCHLINE to a joke called Scientology.

Scientologists are acting out the joke's punchline. I guess "dramatizing" would be an appropriate description, for once.

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

SCIENTOLOGY FUN THEN
Once upon a time, someone actually told the truth about the E-Meter...
"A New Fun-Provoking Stunt for Parties."

SCIENTOLOGY FUN NOW

"If you don't buy two of these meters now, you will be
trapped in the nightmarish hell of the MEST universe
where you will suffer untold tortures for eternity. And
remember, if it's not fun it's not Scientology!"
​

 

[Infinite]

And, for those extra large engrams, see our in-store sales consultant and ask about the Industrial E-Meter, it'll have you blowing charge by the kilowatt in no time . . .

 

[Panda Termint]

Its the embossed twin triangle red towel,
thats gotta be worth $5k on its own.I bet you dont get the towel with it though!!!
Miscavige would sue that towel cause its got no TM stamp on it,
that towel is an sp..

WTF!? - A towel!!??

The guy who made this ad is an undercover mole SP hiding out in Scientology's marketing office!

That towel is a blatant hint that 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy' is the real cosmology and Space Opera.. Which implies that Hubbard's cosmology is rubbish and make believe.. We all know this of course, but to see subliminal advertizing right there in Scientology's official material is shocking, to say the least!

Another possibility is that this is just a lame attempt from Scientology to lure galactic hitchhikers to take a towel with a scientology logo on it. Which would be a horribly evil thing to do! -Just think of the bureaucratic difficuties the poor hitchhiker would get entagled in if the Vogon's ever saw that! - Why he'd risk having Vogon poetry read to him until his untimely death!

Whilst the towel meme is very funny stuff, I'd like to point out that it is NOT a towel.

What you see there is a very expensive red velvet, drawstring bag; custom designed with individual pockets (double-stitched, I might add) the express purpose of which is cosily holding the very expensive silver-plated cans used with the ruby red meter. It features an exquisitely embroidered scientology symbol, just in case you forget its purpose.

It's just another one of those clever little value-added extras that somehow help persuade the buyer that he may just have got a good deal. It's the same sort of idea as those branded floormates they throw in for free with the new car you just bought. At least with the car you know you're gonna get somewhere.

 

[Nicole]

http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Secrets/E-Meter/Mark-VII/index.html

10000 $ ??? ​

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

And, for those extra large engrams, see our in-store sales consultant and ask about the Industrial E-Meter, it'll have you blowing charge by the kilowatt in no time . . .

lololololol lololololol

Is that device part of the SuperPower Rundown?

Helps develop the perception of being electrocuted? What's the EP? Oh yeah....

EP is that you suddenly disappear and a dwarf in a naval costume gives a speech about how you
are doing research in space.

 

[Sindy]

Whilst the towel meme is very funny stuff, I'd like to point out that it is NOT a towel.

What you see there is a very expensive red velvet, drawstring bag; custom designed with individual pockets (double-stitched, I might add) the express purpose of which is cosily holding the very expensive silver-plated cans used with the ruby red meter. It features an exquisitely embroidered scientology symbol, just in case you forget its purpose.

It's just another one of those clever little value-added extras that somehow help persuade the buyer that he may just have got a good deal. It's the same sort of idea as those branded floormates they throw in for free with the new car you just bought. At least with the car you know you're gonna get somewhere.

Very funny!

 

[OTBT]

crossposted to WWP

Tax deductible e-meter

 

[HelluvaHoax!]

And for those busy OT's on the go who want to keep their own ethics in... here's the newest technical breakthrough!

Handy Super Sleuth
SOLO LIE DETECTOR

"What are my Crimes?"​

 

[Nicole]

With that Solo - Lie - Detector you get for free a velvet bag sponcered by the German pharmaceutical companies!

 

[Sindy]

With that Solo - Lie - Detector you get for free a velvet bag sponcered by the German pharmaceutical companies!

but wait, there's more..........

 

[Infinite]

EP is that you suddenly disappear and a dwarf in a naval costume gives a speech about how you are doing research in space.

Like this, you mean . . .

 

[Lurker5]

rolling on the floor

Like this, you mean . . .

 

[Gus]

Something is wrong.

Something is very wrong with this ad.

Something is very very wrong with this ad....

I like this ad better:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rt=nc&nma=true&_rdc=1&item=280586467196

90% off!