This isn't an esoteric question about beingness, it's about ESMB. I come here and lurk sometimes and occasionally I post. I have been out of Scientology for 30 years, so I really should be free of all this. I'm a granny, I could be sitting in front of the fire with my cat asleep on the sofa and I could be knitting a blanket for the soon-to-be-born baby.
So why am I coming onto ESMB endlessly, reading and sometimes posting? Can it be that I am behaving obsessively, that I am unable to let go of the past?
You know, I think my time in the SO came at what should have been the peak of my life's activity, from age 20 to 30, and that could be true of many of us, as we were recruited when we were most likely to be looking for answers to the meaning of life, or disillusioned by society's failure to give us fulfilment.
Also, I recognise that one of the things the SO gave me was a massive group to belong to, and I have never got over the loss of that. I constantly look for news of people I knew back then. Even though I have many other friends from before and after Scientology, none of them share that overwhelming reality.
So. That's why I'm here, I'd like to be here if and when it all comes down, because I do hold Scientology responsible for the loss of some of the most important years of my life. And yes, I want to help anyone who is thinking of leaving, because they need our support.
But mostly I am here because my people are here. Whether I know you personally, or if you have long since forgotten me, I was just another little SO member, trying to get my stats up and find the meaning of life. We are all important, whatever happened to us and whatever we have done since Scientology.
Solo
So why am I coming onto ESMB endlessly, reading and sometimes posting? Can it be that I am behaving obsessively, that I am unable to let go of the past?
You know, I think my time in the SO came at what should have been the peak of my life's activity, from age 20 to 30, and that could be true of many of us, as we were recruited when we were most likely to be looking for answers to the meaning of life, or disillusioned by society's failure to give us fulfilment.
Also, I recognise that one of the things the SO gave me was a massive group to belong to, and I have never got over the loss of that. I constantly look for news of people I knew back then. Even though I have many other friends from before and after Scientology, none of them share that overwhelming reality.
So. That's why I'm here, I'd like to be here if and when it all comes down, because I do hold Scientology responsible for the loss of some of the most important years of my life. And yes, I want to help anyone who is thinking of leaving, because they need our support.
But mostly I am here because my people are here. Whether I know you personally, or if you have long since forgotten me, I was just another little SO member, trying to get my stats up and find the meaning of life. We are all important, whatever happened to us and whatever we have done since Scientology.
Solo