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Wow, this is all heavy ~ may I provide some humor?

Discussion in 'Staff "War Stories"' started by Arcangel, May 14, 2010.

  1. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron

    WOW...reading this I'm amazed.

    My story is a little different and I have a humorous take on Scn and some of the true nutjobs I met there. I do not mean to insult those that did call this a "religion" or even remote "business".

    Small town Pa boy moving to the big bad city of New York. Worked for only 8 months or so for the "Church".

    I was attending NYU for Acting/Performance and was looking for a part-time job to have some spending money. lol A friend, in a few of my core classes wanted to introduce and invite me into something "life changing". The people were nice enough and as I was finishing up my last semester before transferring I did some volunteering.

    Well, signed the "sign your life away for four years" org staff contract. I was to be hatted Com Officer. (Let's see my minor was in marketing and I was Dean's List figured I could do this in my sleep.)

    Moved in with she and her b/f who was also a fellow staff member. At least it was comfortable and had my own room.

    I was stuck in an "office" on the 6th floor (or something like that) and worked w/ a wonderful, but tired, obviously poor and depressed woman named Kathy and an old elderly black gentleman (and that's what he was in all words a gentleman).

    Oh, the times lol Worst thing was was going to the file room to get those folders to do the letters to ensure "stats were up". Can someone (with some humor) explain to me how a Ms. V. Gina (say it fast) who lived somewhere in Brooklyn in 1973 was going to receive my letter in black pen, it HAD to be BLACK, that said "We miss you at the org. Can we expect to see you sometime soon?" I've never gone to Barnes & Noble and had them write me a letter saying "we miss your business". lol

    Talk about unsafe working conditions:

    My favorite part of my job was working the front desk and answering the phones. At least I could see people outside walking past on 45th Street, the marquee to the Richard Rodgers and happiness.

    Well, they decided to have 3 brain cells among them and decide to use high pressure epoxy (almost like glue w/ stone flakes) paint to redo the lobby since shabby chic wasn't selling books or "services". They handed me one of those flimsy, sold for a quarter, masks to wear all the while allowing me to inhale this nasty junk into my lungs.

    Needless to say, I came down with a serious bronchial and throat infection that turned nearly into bronchitis and pnumonia. Well, after a day of coughing my brains out and spitting a little blood I went to my superior and the ethics officer (a woman who had the personality of a wet mop left outside on a few consecutive hot days). They recommended that I goto a Scn doctor. I told them "No" and got on the first bus back to my hometown to see the family doctor that had seen me since I was a small child.

    Oh did they pitch a fit but I was home, in my own bed and under medical supervision not in a damp stuffy office. I took 10 days to me to recover. I swear my folks got easily 100 calls that week asking me when I was coming back, that I was off-lines, out of ethics and all that crap.

    Wait, let me get this straight: You pay me next to nothing, I'm not eating properly b/c of pay rate and YOU GOT ME sick which in a "real" business OSHA would shut you down but I'M at fault?

    Well, I went back, was put on ethics (don't remember what because it was a joke) and had my hand slapped.

    About a month later my favorite Great Aunt passed away after a long battle with cancer. She was probably one of the sweetest, warmest human beings God put on this planet. Raised her family with 3 wonderful children, a marriage of 50+ years, etc.

    I found this out from my family calling me and a letter from my grandmother. I told my "boss" and the ethics officer that I needed to attend this funeral and would be back in three days.

    Immediately, I was put on the cans. I got asked what did I recall about her. I recall this vividly. I usually spent a weekend during the summer with them as a child and she and my Great Uncle grew their own vegetables. She made the most wonderful tomato sandwiches.

    "What do you remember negatively about her?"

    I repeated for easily an hour, nothing. She was a mentor, a confidant and I'd never could or did have anything negative with her but somehow I was "out of ethics" b/c of nothing but the warm memories.

    I was allowed to attend the funeral. Well, I went home the day before the viewing was scheduled. The day of the viewing was the blizzard of '94 which dumped over 36" of snow. Well, the Governor of our state closed down the roads and we didn't see a plow on our street. Called up to the org, "if there isn't a way make a way". I asked back if I should call the Governor to lift the driving ban just so I could write some more letters and hung up. lol

    2 days later the roads were passable to attend the viewing but they couldn't open the grave to place her. All-in-all was "insubordinate" for a total of 6 days this time. Mind you, my professors and such at NYU were very lax about this and understood a family situation.

    I got back and was on forced labor beyond normal duties to "make up the time and the stats we lost bc of your absence".

    I got to know Kathy very well and we'd have amazing conversations about life, etc. I said to her one day what was odd was I was used to going out after work and having a beer or pizza with the people I worked with. I said, I never see anyone having fun, socializing, talking about movies. So, Kathy and another employee made a big show to go out for a few beers and games of pool. It was obvious, this would be a large financial hit and time away from sleep for them but the other employee said, "well, see we Scn's can have fun away from work too". Someone explain that as well.

    Last one for now. Got the opportunity to get one of my union cards by auditioning for and getting on a major motion picture. Time rolled around for the weekend of filming. I asked for the weekend off (just post Easter) and there was going to be 3 wks away a "HUGE" IAS event and launch and we needed to "really make it happen" to go "Saint Hill size".

    I argued this was MY future and part of MY life goals and plans. "Well, don't you believe in the tech and LRH?" I said, yes but if this were the org that I had been presented that increasing and changing your life positively why is this bad for me?" My boss, who was a former modern dancer and actress said but your duties are equally important.

    Yet again, I won the fight, they couldn't do their oppressive guilt trip on me b/c I could think for myself and didn't immerse myself in the tech too much. Again, was out-ethics but I got my S.A.G. card. lol

    Enough for now. Hope you'll enjoy my stories.
    Free Will likes this.
  2. Smilla

    Smilla Ordinary Human

    :) Welcome :)
  3. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron


    right? I have much humor of the SO members I met during my time which I'll say with humor at a later time.
  4. Zinjifar

    Zinjifar Silver Meritorious Sponsor

    welcome aboard, and, yes, we love stories :) Especially ones with happy endings.

  5. FoTi

    FoTi Crusader

    Welcome Arcangel and good for you standing up for yourself and your own life. Looking forward to reading more of your stories.

    Are you still acting?
  6. Wisened One

    Wisened One Crusader

    :laugh: What a hoot you are, Arcangel! Love your writing style. :yes:

    :welcome: to ESMB! And I'm ready for more, whenever you are...:drama:

    IMMORTAL Patron Meritorious

    Very funny. Thanks for sharing this with us. It's typical Scio think. I was staff, too. I know how it goes. Gawd. Glad you're out. Welcome here!
  8. Type4_PTS

    Type4_PTS Diamond Invictus SP

    Welcome Arcangel!

    I'm enjoying the stories. :yes:
  9. HappyGirl

    HappyGirl Gold Meritorious Patron

    :welcome: Arcangel!! I love it! It's rare to meet another that was as lame a Scn as I was!!! :D
  10. GreyWolf

    GreyWolf Gold Meritorious Patron

    Wow! According to policy, they were the out ethics one's. As soon as you had your SAG card they should have sent your happy ass to the CC.
  11. Mest Lover

    Mest Lover Not Sea Org Qualified


    The 6th floor of the NY Org used to be the CMO floor before the CLO EUS renovations. there was a button lock on the door.
  12. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron

    Was I on the 5th or 7th? Truthfully, it's been 15 years and have had a great journey in the "real" world to recall. As I said, I am not attempting to offend but it really was more of a p/t job then my spiritual life.
  13. Mest Lover

    Mest Lover Not Sea Org Qualified

    As I remember the 5th was the CLO floor for regular SO and the course room was on one side in the back. The 6th floor was CMO, it was the floor before the roof. The elevator rarely ever ran and we would have to climb the stairs up and down all day.

    During the CLO EUS renos they piled all of the personal belongings in one huge giant heap in the old course room.

    I had to go through that pile to find the few pairs of pants I had and a few other things I had brought with me.

    There was all kinds of personal stuff in that pile including diaries that showed up later that whomever found them passed around for general reading fodder.

    Was Chris White still around when you were there, he reminded me of Nosferatu with suspenders.
  14. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron

    Yeah, I recall someone that looks like that, I recall a Ray (sweet man), the ED and EO, Judy or Janet was my "boss" and the guy who ran the course room who looked like a reject from Spinal Tap. lol

    So, what floor was the kitchen on b/c that's where my office was and the 3 of us worked. You remember dear Leon (I think was his name elderly black gentleman who had to have been a jazz man along the way.)
  15. byte301

    byte301 Crusader

    Keep talking Arcangel, loving it!:p
  16. Mest Lover

    Mest Lover Not Sea Org Qualified

    The kitchen I was aware of was the Sea Org kitchen in the basement.

    During the renos I wound up sleeping in a small room that had a tiny door in the book sales room in the basement. That tiny room was actually under the sidewalk and had a grate that went up to the street. CLO renos kept some tools in there, I found it better than sleeping on the hardwood floor of a closet in a condo down on 5th avenue with all the other 30 SO members that was on loan to the Renos mission or the William Jefferson Mothtel. I would get some odd looks from the people in the book room when I came out to go back to CLO.

    During the last few days of the renos mission this wacked out crazy bastard, Mike Finley (he looked like Mel Gibson with a goatee), was positive there was a hidden pool beneath the dirt in that room. He was determined to find it and had a small project made of digging the hell out of the floor.

    He found some old matchbook in the dirt and what appeared to be a small staircase leading further down but I don't remember any pool treasure ever being found down there.

    Ray Baiardi (SPelling)? Kind of bald? Nice guy I remember.
    Last edited: May 15, 2010
  17. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron

    Yeah MEST something like that maybe 50s balding very fatherly. Sweet human being. No, we were up around 4 or 5, something behind lock and key was on 6 you are right about that.

    The stairs to the roof were behind the stage in the auditorium. Used to love going up there in the mornings and have my breakfast sandwich and coffee.
  18. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron

    The kitchen was in the basement but never used. I was in another on a higher floor, crawled up the steps and they could never afford to repair the elevator.

    Secondary, that was unfinished, cramped, mildewy and sweaty and the room had an opening on the end w/ the grating on 45th Street. More power to you. Used to scare the shit out of me armed w/ a flashlight and nothing else.
  19. Mest Lover

    Mest Lover Not Sea Org Qualified

    Ah the bugs in there were better company than the SO members. There were some huge multi legged centipede type things with giant antennae living in there with me.
  20. Arcangel

    Arcangel Patron

    More humor from NYFD (and we're not talking the Fire Department lol)

    Took some time to read some of the humor, the horror and the confusion to remember stuff. Since I have a few moments I'll type some further musings.

    I want to start off with something serious but a compliment to both Bea and Scooter for sharing their equal horror stories. Scooter esp since I worked in just an "Ideal (Ideal? Really, but more on that below) Org".

    As I said, I was at NYU during the day LOVED my coursework and had some amazing prof's that challenged me emotionally, mentally, physically with serious training and POSITIVE (what a concept) criticism, encouragement and enthusiasm.

    How does this relate? As Alex said best in "Clockwork Orange", "that dear brothers is the height of the story".

    Fast Forward in my usual day to 6 p.m. "Muster". I used to jokingly call it Mustard b/c it was just like the condiment full of vinegar and not my favorite on a hot dog.

    We lined up in those idiotic rows b/c Eron was in the Navy. And we'd be told about the never-ending "Birthday Game". Read a quote that made absolutely no sense at all ~ I have wonderful memory retention yet I cannot for the life of me remember anything b/c most of it didn't make educated sense ~ only weird rambles. Though I do recall a few times where we got the (excuse the not recalling the exact quote) "People believe what they read in books. People don't believe in people. So, make people believe what is in the book".

    HUH? That doesn't make sense. Guess ole Enron never went to a medical doctor for treatment or if he did the Doc must've been doing it on a wink and a prayer. HMMMMM??? I mean, it's quite obvious that he never read a business administration book.

    So, then like you Scooter, I'd be biting the inside of my cheek putting on a blank face yet laughing inside.

    Camera pans across the room: Disolve into scene, extras rejects from Day of the Dead, wearing out of date clothes, bad hairstyles. Focus on: Woman with a jacket from the 70s with a sagging sown on fabric flower with mussed hair. Fade out.

    We'd do the "Hip Hip Hooray 3x" thing. Thank God we were out of that stuffy room.

    Now, I've been to plenty of business meetings even at that young green age in business but I've never been screamed at like that at the start of my "work day". We weren't "upstat"? Really? How's that? With the "greatest tech in the world" making a business plan or a marketing strategy was that inconceivable? I knew peers in high school who used 9th grade business classes who could do this.

    Sooooo....out to Times Square we went. Not into Broadway or other tourist direct areas. This was 645-715 EVERY night. Set up the table to sell a book or hand a bookmark. The old Times Square con artists, vendors and hustlers knew better marketing. It was VERY rare that we "body routed" people into the Org (though next to a Broadway theater and the side door of not one but two major hotels) and if they did they were tourists looking at the thrill.

    Someone PLEASE explain this to me?

    working in the fun ~ NOT ​

    According to all this "Tech" for happiness and all that. Everything had some positive sounding adjective but I've never seen people with scowls on their faces.

    Because of NYU and my pursuits of a Broadway career I was exposed to many corporate execs, as well as, producers, directors and others (none who were "with" the "Church" but REAL businesses). Though I was green and had yet to finish my Bachelors I impressed many with my Moxie and corporate networking skills.

    None of this was important only Thurs @ 2 p.m. and "upstats" and "sell the services". I had an internship where I had to raise money and we strategized as a team. Made a plan. Rocked it out! Yet again, this didn't matter. I've never seen more people who were supposed to be on the "Path to Happiness" or whatever to get the "Key to Life" who were more negative and arrogant than the Broadway Legends I had the opportunity to meet and/or work with.

    Scowls. Slumped shoulders. Chain smoking habits. Body Odor. Toxic Personalities. These folks were on the "Path to Happiness"? Really, you haven't eaten a balance meal in 3 days, changed your suit jacket, don't work as a team, have clearcut goals yet you're the "Happiest" people on earth?

    I used to get handled left and right b/c I tried to tell the "wins" I had at University, with my coursework at NYU. I had to PRIVILEGE through my day job to meet the gent who created MANY dedicated now legendary shows both working on the book, directing or producing or all three who was working on his last show at age, get this, 104. Of course, I was talking for days and got "handled" by "well we have celebrities who are famous in Co$". No shit, you can't miss their faces on the posters throughout the building but how's your little "sell" to me relating to something most have envied even today. I was "out-ethics" b/c it wasn't a Scn. FUCK THAT LOL

    The worst was the condescending screaming and "talk down" culture that permeated. I retreated to my office, which like you Scooter I decked out in stuff I could relate to, had life and happiness. Thank God I had a radio and tuned into K-Rock and was known for the humor of rocking out while writing letters or doing other things. I rarely got caught b/c I was on a high floor and the elevator was broken. lol

    Best part of the gig was on Saturday's I'd be asked to run errands. Staples for office supplies (didn't they know they delivered FOR FREE) and had to goto the Post Office to get stamps amongst other things.

    This was heaven even on the cold, windy snowy days. I learned the LONGEST ways to go taking in the architecture, learning lines for calls or just being a 21 yo kid in this city of dreams. I learned where the farthest Staples was and got to know the staff well with my sense of humor and then went crosstown to the Post Office.

    On the way back got my lunch, to-go on my dime and from savings certainly not from the pay. lol

    I did this for about 2 to 2.5 months until we had gotten sent a SO guy to oversee I think it was GAT and Enron's B/day Celebration. This guy was always in the "service whites" (though I thought he looked like something out of the Village People in both costume and demeanor). I never heard this guy say anything positive, laugh or away from the task of "saving the planet".

    I got sat down and got a whole lecture about the "need to rush" b/c the "tech was so important" and the public needed to "be handled". Really? Me getting fresh air, a little exercise and a few minutes away from the drama though I was there from about 9am-9pm on a Saturday the "entire planet" will collapse all because little old me took my time?

    Most in the business worked are given an hour lunch and maybe an occasional 20 minute break. In his mind, my mindset, education and other were skewed or whatever the word was for that.

    More to come soon. Hope you like. If any have some humor to add on this b/c you can relate please add it on to this. lol