Handling the Ex-Scientologist Correctly and On Policy.

[Mest Lover]

I was just reminded of the way I chose my handle on here.

I am wondering if there is great thought that goes into your nickname, was it a chance event, something you planned ahead of time?

Did you reach down into the depths of your Scientology past and drag out some form of revenge?

Did you want a Scientology google search to lead to you?

My Story:

I woke up one day, went to work, got home, had a 5 liter mini-keg of Heineken outside cooling off.

​

Tapped into it and had maybe 2 glasses too many.
Got a bit nostalgic and either saw something on the net that reminded me I hadn't done a search in a decade for anything Scientology related.

Decided to do my regular searching, came upon an Anon site that showed pictures of CLO EUS and a "Raid." I had not heard that before, decided to do some more searching and a few clicks later found ESMB.

http://forums.whyweprotest.net/121-flash-raids/nyc-anons-flash-raid-clo-eus-rain-16596/
http://forums.whyweprotest.net/121-flash-raids/nyc-anons-troll-clo-eus-23595/

​

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCqeQq3fPcw

I read a few things and it dawned on me that I was not the only person who felt the things I felt about the Sea Organization. Being buzzed at the time I decided against, what was then my usual thing not to involve myself, only search and spectate and become an active person.

I figured what would one post with just the main points of my story hurt me, looks like an anonymous place to be...

I started the process by registering, hmmm then the problem of a name that nobody would know me by came up.

That stumped me for a bit, I couldn't think of anything so simple as a name for a 1 time post.

I can type as fast as I can talk and sometimes my fingers fly faster than I can think. I just stared at the screen and told my fingers to blast it out. Out popped "Mest Lover" I really have no idea why, beer, anger, anti-scn, revenge, rebellion, work ethic, I liked it though.

I can't believe I am still here, I never expected what happened to me after that post.

What is your nickname story?

 

[Good twin]

Even though I have no biological twin I have often been in relationships where I was the "other half of the coin". This was true of my relationship with Kathy who introduced me to the site. It was also true of my coaudit partner who didn't survive Scientology. Being Good twin with the disclaimer of sometimes being evil also represents the duality of my own individuality. I can't even begin to imagine being just one identity.

It was also true that I was every academy's favorite student and coach for many years. I could have done the "good twin road trip" easily by traveling from org to org prior to my exit from the cult. The good twin world tour and road trip as an Ex has been much more fullfilling for me and infinitely more enlightening.

As Good twin I've met squirrels and SPs and anonymous Exes and fully outs and Exes still in good standing and in hiding. I've recovered people from my past who I didn't even know were out and I've met people who I felt like I've always known. I've shared my adventures here on ESMB.

I didn't put a lot of thought into choosing the name. I was so anxious to log on I just picked it. I never really lurked. I just dove in. Once I started living the persona I came to realize how fitting it is.

 

[Smilla]

I chose my name because it's my name.

 

[Good twin]

I chose my name because it's my name.

How sneaky.....

 

[Mest Lover]

I just dove in. Once I started living the persona I came to realize how fitting it is.

Interesting, I wonder if we grow into our nicknames or if they are the part of us that help us grow out of Scientology and into what we were or maybe need to become apart from it.

 

[Good twin]

Interesting, I wonder if we grow into our nicknames or if they are the part of us that help us grow out of Scientology and into what we were or maybe need to become apart from it.

I like to think that it was intuitive of me to choose sort of randomly what I really needed to become. I did something I almost never would have done as a Scientology Staff member or student. I went with my gut. It felt good and rebellious and honest and pure.

I change my avatar all the time, but I never regret choosing that name.

 

[uniquemand]

I chose my name because it is representative of a philosophy I believe in where each person has to be taken on their own terms, assessed individually, and specifically met with what they are needing or wanting.

Variation on person-centered ethos and Bodhisattva Vow. Latinized.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtKhakSmwhA

 

[Tiger Lily]

Interesting thread.

Actually I put a lot of thought into mine.

The Tiger was easy:
Ron said it himself in KSW series 1– it’s a rough universe. . . .you know the rest.

But in addition: I’ve loved tigers since I can remember; even decorated my room with them as a kid.

In Tibetan Buddhism, the tiger symbolizes unconditional confidence, disciplined awareness, kindness and modesty. It is relaxed yet energized; resting in a gentle state of being that has a natural sense of satisfaction and fulfillment, referring to the state of enlightenment.


The Lily:
There’s personal significance for me of a Lily, so it was easy for me too, but also the lily symbolizes abundance and renewal as well as vulnerability, and the freedom to be ourselves, as well as allowing others to be as they are as well, which I feel epitomizes ESMB.

In particular the Tiger Lily symbolizes female courage.

My first Avatar:
Scientology experience is something of a baptism by fire. You either are consumed by it or you come out refined. I made it, and I will never be the same again.

-TL

 

[Kathy (ImOut)]

I came up with ImOut because I was out of Scn. Then I added the Kathy in front of that, since that's my name and I was sick of any reference to having been a Scn. I kept the ImOut just not to confuse anyone around here.

 

[Mest Lover]

Interesting thread.

Actually I put a lot of thought into mine.

The Tiger was easy:
Ron said it himself in KSW series 1– it’s a rough universe. . . .you know the rest.

-TL

I remember seeing your avatar for the first time and realizing it was a squirrel, I thought that was the coolest idea.

I love Zantedeschia

​

Easter Lilly, rebirth...


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zantedeschia_aethiopica

 

[Tiger Lily]

I remember seeing your avatar for the first time and realizing it was a squirrel, I thought that was the coolest idea.

I love Zantedeschia

​

lol -- that came from when HCObringorder? called me "Tiger Squirrel" in the 2 word limit thread -- so I found a photo.

What a gorgeous flower!

-TL

 

[Tiger Lily]

Interesting, I wonder if we grow into our nicknames or if they are the part of us that help us grow out of Scientology and into what we were or maybe need to become apart from it.

I like to think that it was intuitive of me to choose sort of randomly what I really needed to become. I did something I almost never would have done as a Scientology Staff member or student. I went with my gut. It felt good and rebellious and honest and pure.

I change my avatar all the time, but I never regret choosing that name.

I have always loved your nic, GT -- it's perfect. And it's fun to see what went behind it.

Mest Lover -- that is so cool that it just came up -- very rebellious for a Scientologist to say something like that!!

I chose my nic both based on what I was feeling at the time and what I wanted to eventually become. At first it was mostly an f-u to LRH -- about what "only the tigers survive" really meant. . . .but when I looked up the sympbolism of the Tiger and the Lily,(and the "Tiger Lily" itself) I knew that had to be my name because it was what I knew I wanted to become, and what I knew was somewhere inside me.

I think we choose our names to be descriptive in some way -- to give the board some information about ourselves, an "identity" that somehow lets people know who we are or what we value, or something about our experience.

I would love to hear everyone's stories -- I hope people post them!

-TL

 

[Ted]

I have always loved your nic, GT -- it's perfect. And it's fun to see what went behind it.

Mest Lover -- that is so cool that it just came up -- very rebellious for a Scientologist to say something like that!!

I chose my nic both based on what I was feeling at the time and what I wanted to eventually become. At first it was mostly an f-u to LRH -- about what "only the tigers survive" really meant. . . .but when I looked up the sympbolism of the Tiger and the Lily,(and the "Tiger Lily" itself) I knew that had to be my name because it was what I knew I wanted to become, and what I knew was somewhere inside me.

I think we choose our names to be descriptive in some way -- to give the board some information about ourselves, an "identity" that somehow lets people know who we are or what we value, or something about our experience.

I would love to hear everyone's stories -- I hope people post them!

-TL

I am Ted. That's my nick, real name Theodore, but no one knows me by that.

I have been posting to the internet since the early to mid-'90s. I decided to post as my self so as to show no fear or repercussion from the church, or from speaking out in general. I am also locatable by anyone whom I have worked with in the past. They are free to contact me to say, "Hey man, you really screwed me up," or just a simple, "Hello," or "Thank you."

My avatar is a statement. It says I am free and I do not run with the pack. Sometimes I am pro-scientology, sometimes not; almost always anti-church and anti-management.

As always, best wishes,

Ted

 

[Wisened One]

My nick just kept popping into my head while trying to think up a Nick, so...

At times I want to change it, but don't know to what...'Wisened One' just keeps sticking...as that's what I feel has happened to me when realizing the con of scn...

 

[Mest Lover]

I chose my nic both based on what I was feeling at the time and what I wanted to eventually become.

-TL

Also, have you seen this movie?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/What's_Up,_Tiger_Lily?

Probably the only Woody Allen movie I have ever liked or laughed at.

 

[TG1]

Good question, MEST LOVER.

My TG1 nick here was assigned to me by the software, and I don't yet know how to change it. I thought at some point I'd change it -- and Emma told me she'd help. But in the meantime, I'm enjoying the total anonymity I feel in posting here.

I post somewhere else under another nick, so this handle is even anonymous to that anonymous handle. I'm grumpier, less social here than I am on other 'servs, boards, blogs. I feel more suspicious here, less get-along'y -- attitudes I enjoy exploring.

It's obvious this is a community with unique rules and politics. But I don't yet have relationships here to speak of and, as a consequence, feel no major obligations to anyone or my even prior and changing ways of thinking. It feels quite free'ing.

At least that's how I see it for now.

When I first started lurking here I saw people and behaviors here that irritated me quite a bit, which no longer bug me because now I understand a bit more than I did then. And I see new people show up here I think are trolls of various ilks, but I don't feel comfortable hollering at 'em. I suppose you old-timers are inured to all that by now and don't sweat it much.

Mainly, I'm trying to catch up by reading old posts and old material. There's so much info out there I haven't seen yet. Am focusing on old reading and material lists for now.

Mainly -- this board feels like a reality show where I'm mostly backstage. I don't mean that at all as an insult to anyone. Just don't know how else to put it. I've never been anywhere like this before.

 

[Ladybird]

My nick is the name of my beloved dog "Ladybird" who was my best friend throughout my childhood.

One day Ladybird was sitting under the apple tree in our yard and an idiot woman who was walking by came in to our yard and tried to pet her puppies so Ladybird bit her. It wasn't a bad bite, barely broke the skin and the woman was tresspassing, but being a jerk she threatened to sue. Ladybird was a purebred with all her shots and very much loved and she was just being a good mom, but the county dog catcher came and took her away, along with her puppies.

I was only 12 at the time, but it has affected me ever since. I still raise dogs but I keep them protected.

 

[Arthur Dent]

I lurked for some time. I was very busy all the time and never had time to figure out a nick or figure out how you folks got all those very impressive smiley thingies going and, to be honest, I was quite intimidated by it all. Sounds silly or lame, I know. But some things can't be helped. Contrary to the ever popular "you are responsible for your own condition." I claim no responsibility here. Just totally inexperienced the the ways of the posting world. I was just a virgin poster... (Yeah, yeah, well we know how that story goes...)

So, how the hell did I pick my nick?? (Gee that sounds awful!)

I'll be honest. I can't remember what led me to it! It wasn't that long ago and I should remember but I just can't now. I must have been searching along some whim of an idea and came across it and thought it would be fun and was Oh! so pleased that I found a matching Hitchhiker sign!!! This was cool as new shoes! Then the avatar.... Well does that go or what??
But for the life of me I cannot remember the thought process that led me to my AD character. I was just so anxious to post or I was going to burst. Maybe it was the thought of galaxy and one thing led to another...yeah that was it! (Some free association there! Whew!)
However, I think my name has confused many. And to those I say let google be your friend. ...and sorry.
The name does not identify my personality in any real way except I do like books and I like this character. So, in the end I feel my nick is not really fitting and although I thought it clever (oh, do say it's so!) and it was done with fun, it was also done in haste.
I may want to change my nick at some point but perhaps with this explanation it now won't be necessary...(now that I've gotten the WRONG ITEM off!!!) which is good because, again, I have no idea how to do that!!
Oh, God, now I'm out list!!! Where's my L4??
Meanwhile, before I come up with an item, these describe my personality:

and of course there is the dark side:
Oh, it's not that dark!!

GT, I loved your nick story. Beautiful!
Fun thread, ML!

 

[Mest Lover]

Good question, MEST LOVER.

My TG1 nick here was assigned to me by the software, and I don't yet know how to change it. I thought at some point I'd change it -- and Emma told me she'd help. But in the meantime, I'm enjoying the total anonymity I feel in posting here.

I post somewhere else under another nick, so this handle is even anonymous to that anonymous handle. I'm grumpier, less social here than I am on other 'servs, boards, blogs. I feel more suspicious here, less get-along'y -- attitudes I enjoy exploring.

It's obvious this is a community with unique rules and politics. But I don't yet have relationships here to speak of and, as a consequence, feel no major obligations to anyone or my even prior and changing ways of thinking. It feels quite free'ing.

At least that's how I see it for now.

When I first started lurking here I saw people and behaviors here that irritated me quite a bit, which no longer bug me because now I understand a bit more than I did then. And I see new people show up here I think are trolls of various ilks, but I don't feel comfortable hollering at 'em. I suppose you old-timers are inured to all that by now and don't sweat it much.

Mainly, I'm trying to catch up by reading old posts and old material. There's so much info out there I haven't seen yet. Am focusing on old reading and material lists for now.

Mainly -- this board feels like a reality show where I'm mostly backstage. I don't mean that at all as an insult to anyone. Just don't know how else to put it. I've never been anywhere like this before.

What a great post! Your software made your nick? I would run with that!

Odd thing with me was that I lurked for 10 years, completely forgot for 10 years, then upon finding ESMB I felt at home.

It has only brought me out more since arriving, I was so non-out when I first posted. ESMB changed me, and I even fought it at first. I am no longer fighting it, free speech is something I hold dear as a conservative, but SCN was something with a blanket smothering me about my time in the Sea Org.

I can now see the day when my name, much like Kathy (I'm Out) has done, showing up with my nick.

 

[Mest Lover]

I lurked for some time. I was very busy all the time and never had time to figure out a nick or figure out how you folks got all those very impressive smiley thingies going and, to be honest, I was quite intimidated by it all. Sounds silly or lame, I know. But some things can't be helped. Contrary to the ever popular "you are responsible for your own condition." I claim no responsibility here. Just totally inexperienced the the ways of the posting world. I was just a virgin poster... (Yeah, yeah, well we know how that story goes...)

So, how the hell did I pick my nick?? (Gee that sounds awful!)

I'll be honest. I can't remember what led me to it! It wasn't that long ago and I should remember but I just can't now. I must have been searching along some whim of an idea and came across it and thought it would be fun and was Oh! so pleased that I found a matching Hitchhiker sign!!! This was cool as new shoes! Then the avatar.... Well does that go or what??
But for the life of me I cannot remember the thought process that led me to my AD character. I was just so anxious to post or I was going to burst. Maybe it was the thought of galaxy and one thing led to another...yeah that was it! (Some free association there! Whew!)
However, I think my name has confused many. And to those I say let google be your friend. ...and sorry.
The name does not identify my personality in any real way except I do like books and I like this character. So, in the end I feel my nick is not really fitting and although I thought it clever (oh, do say it's so!) and it was done with fun, it was also done in haste.
I may want to change my nick at some point but perhaps with this explanation it now won't be necessary...(now that I've gotten the WRONG ITEM off!!!) which is good because, again, I have no idea how to do that!!
Oh, God, now I'm out list!!! Where's my L4??
Meanwhile, before I come up with an item, these describe my personality:

and of course there is the dark side:
Oh, it's not that dark!!

GT, I loved your nick story. Beautiful!
Fun thread, ML!

I remember fondly the day that hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy showed up on WGBH channel 2 in Boston.

The wrecking ball scenario to your concept of the Universe.
Babblefish later...

Funny how the Panic dude was stolen, much like the rest, for Ghost Busters.