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The Little Thread Which Grew - the Apollo '73 to Everything But

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lkwdblds

Crusader
I put the pot their and stirred it but...........

Nah...Lakey. If that happens it'll all be your fault...you're the one that put the pot on the stove and keeps stirrin' it. We're just fillin' it with our garbage.:D:thumbsup:

Face:happydance:

I put the pot there and stirred it for a long time alone, and then for a long time with a lot of help from Carmelo. I put it there and kept stirring only because that is all I could do, except for adding a little seasoning here and there. You guys, Ted, Roger and yourself brought in the big guns, the Big Bertha's and Howitzer's, I talked about Yvonne not promoting me to Treas Sec back in '72. That's a human interest story with some interest in it but compared to the stuff you guys are writing, its a pop gun or water pistol in a parade of heavy artillelry.

I appreciate your kind words for the part I did play.
Lakey
 
Hi Veda!

I'm not part of this conversation, but I couldn't help but notice that when the "tech" is described as faulty, that is not heard, but, rather, becomes the "Church" is faulty.

Why not hear what's actually being said and, then, if one disagrees, honestly express that disagreement? Why pretend to hear something else and gloss over the actual issues?

A good reality check there, buddy. :) Applies to everything in life. See and hear without internal distortions, additions or denials. Are you a therapist? :D

In my humble opinion, aspects of both "tech" and "church" are faulty...and considering that the church's business is selling the tech, the two are pretty well entwined. We'll never all be in total agreement over all this, but I do think we all see aspects of it.

I'm still o.k. with Indies and Freezoners, it's really the multiple abuses of the "church" that I'm against. People are free to explore whatever philosophies and spiritual practices they choose.

Veda, I have nothing but respect for you and your opinions. Go ahead and be part of this conversation! :thumbsup: A good call for us to to look at and consider something you've observed here.

At least we're not rolling around in the dirt and slinging mud at each other like some of the other threads have done...:whistling:
 
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Quick thought on evil being real or not...

I agree with you on this Rog except for your use of the term "evil". I attribute much of Hubbard's reputed "evil" to the likelihood of his suffering a lifelong mental illness and thereby being unstable & frequently irrational.

I'm not a believer in "evil". That is too moralistic a concept for me to accept. To me it makes a great deal more sense that individuals are acting to promote what they see as somehow "good". The conflict which is described as "evil" arises from warped & mistaken perspectives resulting from adherence to irrationalities & ignorance.

For me "evil" does not exist.

Hell, as much as I dislike him, I don't even see Dick Cheney as evil, merely criminally insane.


Mark A. Baker

Dear Mr. Mark A Baker,

I don't necessarily think that people, beings or entities are "evil", but evil actions and intentions surely do exist. I would say it is just the willingness to do harm to another, on any and all levels. That's evil to me.

P.S. I agree with you about LRH, he clearly had mental, emotional, and substance abuse issues that were never fully or properly addressed.
 
Yummy! New stories!

I think I am reading new "look"s to this topic of Scientology, that I haven't heard or read before. My favorite kind of story telling - where everybody adds to the pot.

Now if we only had some home made wine, some cheese, some crackers, and a salty breeze blowing across our little group of clam diggers.

I will make the cheese fondue for all us clamdiggers! :thumbsup: With fresh baked bread! :D

I think we have a new motto for this thread: "Blowing zorches one mind at a time!" :D

:hattip: to Rog! :D
 
Now if we only had some home made wine, some cheese, some crackers, and a salty breeze blowing across our little group of clam diggers.

That should be non-alcoholic wine with microbial/vegetable rennet cheese on whole grain crackers. I'll let the clams pass, as long as they aren't the aquatic kind. :whistling:


Mark A. Baker
 

Leon

Gold Meritorious Patron
I heard this on the radio yesterday. It is one of my favoritie pieces of music by Mozart. There are several small blips in the recording but they do not ruin the performance. There are other performances on youtube without the blips but there is no live performance going on plus I just love the diva, Cecilia Bartoli of Italy. Mozart wrote this in Salzburg at age 24 and it was first performed there for his patron, the archbishop, for a Vespers service.

People who do not like classical music very much, such as my wife, liked this very much. It can be used sort of as relaxation music if you don't lke clasical - you know, if you had a hard day at work or someone cut you off in traffic or gave you the finger, this should put you back together again.

This is pure music just for the sake of music plus for Catholics, it is meant to honor God. The composer knew music backwards and forwards, upside down and inside out. I believe he only had one equal in this regard and that was the great J.S. Bach. Others may have excelled more in melody or rhythm or some specific facet of music but in just compositional knowledge alone, I think Mozart and J.S. Bach had no equals.

Aethestics is at tone 8.0 but I think this music is much higher in tone that just aesthetics. I don't know the tone where its at. Its not games or action, maybe there is a spirit of play. I don't know how Mozart was able to achieve tone levels of this elevation. In life, he was a sort of sex crazed, jokester type of guy. His personal life and his music were totally detached.

Okay Carmelo, if you want to do a Mad Magazine overlay of this article using rock musicians, I would be honored. You have more than earned the right by helping me so much.

Lakey
P.S. - I believe I was there at the opening performance in Salzburg in 1780 in the Dom Kirche (Domed Cathedral, still standing there). I was a 16 year old
lad by the name of Franz Xavier Gerl, or so I believe.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LzVvC6NXXBA

If you'd like to hear it without sound distortions, there are two other versions on youtube with perfect sound, Emma Kirkby's and Lucia Popp's.


Not bad. Bartoli is a favourite of mine, especcially those duets with Bryn Terfel. But the ultimate never-surpassed Laudate Dominum was sung by Ely Ameling. Hard to get hold of these days.
 

lkwdblds

Crusader
Thank for commenting Leon!

Not bad. Bartoli is a favourite of mine, especcially those duets with Bryn Terfel. But the ultimate never-surpassed Laudate Dominum was sung by Ely Ameling. Hard to get hold of these days.

Thanks for commenting and thanks for the tip on the Ameling performance, I have never heard that. Good old Leon, you liked Goethe and his poems and the Horst Wessel military song and now Mozart. I figured that you had a lot of time track in Germany and/or Austria and was really surprised when you said you didn't.

I am a Kraut at heart but I think more an Austrian or Bavarian. I always rooted for Germany to win and be more important in the World. When World War II came along, it kind of makes one re evaluate. Of course everybody wanted them to lose WWII but the fact that Hitler was able to gain power there seemed to seriously compromise and demean the German people. I no longer feel that way.

Austria is quite different, I just was there last June to visit Karl Braunsteiner of this Board. Some of the last battles of World War II in Europe were fought around where Karl lived in the St. Polten area about 40 miles West of Vienna in the large hills and woods near Vienna. The Soviets came in and apparently the Austrians put up a hell of a fight for quite a while but ultimately the Russians prevailed. Austria was going to be divided just like Germany, between the allies, and Vienna wqas going to have 4 sections just like Berlin but they tell me that very early on, maybe after a couple of months or so, beyond the war's end, the Russians pulled out and let the Austrain's resume control. I asked Karl why and he said that economically and politically, it was not worth the expense and the effort for the Soviet union to control Austria and compete with the West there. The Austrians wore Nazi uniforms then but pretty much by 1945 with a Nazi defeat apparent, they were mainly resisting the Russians. For hundreds of years they have been defending themselves agains attacks from the East, especially the Russians and the Turks. In 1945, things were no different.
 

Leon

Gold Meritorious Patron
Ah but the old Austrian Empire that was is no more - since the 1st World War. It was the world capital of music and culture.
 
story from NBC news Miami (not a joke)

http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local-beat/TSA-Fracas-After-Body-Scanner-Reveals-TMI-92971929.html


Suspicious Package: TSA Worker Jailed After Junk Joke
MIA worker assaults colleague who made crack at genitalia after walk through machine
By WILLARD SHEPARD and BRIAN HAMACHER
Updated 10:02 AM EDT, Fri, May 7, 2010

Miami-Dade Police
Perhaps the new airport body scanners are a bit too revealing.

A TSA worker in Miami was arrested for aggravated battery after police say he attacked a colleague who'd made fun of his small genitalia after he walked through one of the new high-tech security scanners during a recent training session.

Rolando Negrin, 44, was busted for assault after things got ugly at Miami International Airport between Negrin and some of his fellow Transportation Security Administration workers on Tuesday.

Sources say Negrin stepped into the machine during the training session and became embarrassed and angry when a supervisor started cracking jokes about his manhood, made visible by the new machine.

According to the police report, Negron confronted one of his co-workers in an employee parking lot, where he hit him with a police baton on the arm and back.

"[Negron] then told victim to kneel down and say 'your sorry,'" the report reads. "Victim stated he was in fear and complied with [Negron]."
Negron was arrested the next day when he arrived for work. He told police he had been made fun of by coworkers on a daily basis.

"[Negron] stated he could not take the jokes anymore and lost his mind," the report reads.

Negrin was arrested and booked into Miami-Dade County Jail. His arrest photo (above) shows him wearing his blue TSA shirt at the time of the arrest.

The attack may be the first piece of proof that the new scanners may be leaving too little to the imagination.

The $170,000 machines, which were introduced last year, took some heat from fliers who weren't quite ready to show their bod to government employees.

But if this latest incident is any indication, the scanners sound like good news for anti-terrorism and bad news for less-than-average men.
First Published: May 6, 2010 10:48 AM EDT
 
and from Heathrow

http://www.barcelonareporter.com/in...lm_star_shahrukh_khan_printed_circulated_by_/

Naked Body Scanner Images Of Film Star Shahrukh Khan Printed, Circulated By Airport Staff

“It is very important to stress that the images which are captured by body scanners are immediately deleted after the passenger has gone through the body scanner,” Adonis told the London Evening Standard


Naked Body Scanner Images Of Film Star Shahrukh Khan Printed, Circulated By Airport Staff

Claims on behalf of authorities that naked body scanner images are immediately destroyed after passengers pass through new x-ray backscatter devices have been proven fraudulent after it was revealed that naked images of Indian film star Shahrukh Khan were printed out and circulated by airport staff at Heathrow in London.

UK Transport Secretary Lord Adonis said last week that the images produced by the scanners were deleted “immediately” and airport staff carrying out the procedure are fully trained and supervised.

“It is very important to stress that the images which are captured by body scanners are immediately deleted after the passenger has gone through the body scanner,” Adonis told the London Evening Standard.

Adonis was forced to address privacy concerns following reports that the images produced by the scanners broke child pornography laws in the UK. When the scanners were first introduced, it was also speculated that images of famous people would be ripe for abuse as the pictures produced by the devices make genitals “eerily visible” according to journalists who have investigated trials of the technology.

However, the Transport Secretary’s assurances were demolished after it was revealed on the BBC’s Jonathan Ross show Friday that Indian actor Shahrukh Khan had passed through a body scan and later had the image of his naked body printed out and circulated by Heathrow security staff

“I was in London recently going through the airport and these new machines have come up, the body scans. You’ve got to see them. It makes you embarrassed – if you’re not well endowed,” said Khan, referring to how the scans produce clear images of a person’s genitals.

“You walk into the machine and everything – the whole outline of your body – comes out,” he said.

“I was a little scared. Something happens [inside the scans], and I came out. Then I saw these girls – they had these printouts. I looked at them. I thought they were some forms you had to fill. I said ‘give them to me’ – and you could see everything inside. So I autographed them for them,” stated Khan.

The story was carried by Yahoo News under the headline “Shah Rukh signs off sexy body-scan printouts at Heathrow”.

Khan’s reference to “girls” with printouts of his naked body scan can only refer to female airport security staff responsible for processing the images produced by the scanners, “professionals” who are supposed to instantly delete the images, according to Lord Adonis.

The revelation that airport security staff are completely abusing any notion of the professionalism promised by authorities by printing out and circulating images of naked body scans should set alarm bells ringing, especially in light of the fact that such images of minors break child pornography laws. British authorities have made it mandatory for travelers to submit to the naked body scanners when asked and have overturned previous rules that prevented under 18s from passing through the devices.

Within days of the devices being introduced at Heathrow, staff have abused their professionalism and printed out naked scans of a famous actor for their own titillation.

We were promised all along that the body scanners “increased privacy” because they were only accessible to a single staff member who had no personal contact with the passenger taking the scan, in addition to the assurance that the images could not be saved and were instantly deleted. It in fact turns out that airport staff have been saving, printing and circulating naked body scans in complete violation of these supposed guarantees.

Furthermore, we were told that the identity of the person undergoing the virtual strip search would also be kept private. The fact that Heathrow employees must have known that the actor was about to take the body scan in order to print out copies of the image also proves this claim to be a total fallacy.

The abuse of the naked body scan images in this instance is a total violation of every data protection law in the UK. Far from treating the story in a comical manner, Khan should be filing a very expensive lawsuit and preparing for a successful and lucrative outcome.

In the meantime, the revelation that the naked body scanner images are being freely printed out and circulated by airport security staff should prove to be the death knell for plans on behalf of governments worldwide to institute the scanners on a widespread basis.

Courts have consistently found that strip searches are only legal when performed on a person who has already been found guilty of a crime or on arrestees pending trial where a reasonable suspicion has to exist that they are carrying a weapon. Subjecting masses of people to blanket strip searches in airports reverses the very notion of innocent until proven guilty.

Barring people from flying and essentially treating them like terrorists for refusing to be humiliated by the virtual strip search is a clear breach of the basic human right of freedom of movement. Security experts agree that such scanners would not even have stopped the incident that has been exploited to justify their widespread introduction – the Christmas Day underwear bomber.

Not only have the scanners proven to be a total violation of privacy, but major international radiation safety groups are now warning of the health risks they pose.

Despite governments claiming that backscatter x-ray systems produce radiation too low to pose a threat, the Inter-Agency Committee on Radiation Safety concluded in their report that governments must justify the use of the scanners and that a more accurate assessment of the health risks is needed.

Pregnant women and children should not be subject to scanning, according to the report, adding that governments should consider “other techniques to achieve the same end without the use of ionizing radiation.”
 

Ted

Gold Meritorious Patron
http://www.nbcmiami.com/news/local-beat/TSA-Fracas-After-Body-Scanner-Reveals-TMI-92971929.html


Suspicious Package: TSA Worker Jailed After Junk Joke
MIA worker assaults colleague who made crack at genitalia after walk through machine
By WILLARD SHEPARD and BRIAN HAMACHER
Updated 10:02 AM EDT, Fri, May 7, 2010

Miami-Dade Police
Perhaps the new airport body scanners are a bit too revealing.

A TSA worker in Miami was arrested for aggravated battery after police say he attacked a colleague who'd made fun of his small genitalia after he walked through one of the new high-tech security scanners during a recent training session.

Rolando Negrin, 44, was busted for assault after things got ugly at Miami International Airport between Negrin and some of his fellow Transportation Security Administration workers on Tuesday.

Sources say Negrin stepped into the machine during the training session and became embarrassed and angry when a supervisor started cracking jokes about his manhood, made visible by the new machine.

According to the police report, Negron confronted one of his co-workers in an employee parking lot, where he hit him with a police baton on the arm and back.

"[Negron] then told victim to kneel down and say 'your sorry,'" the report reads. "Victim stated he was in fear and complied with [Negron]."
Negron was arrested the next day when he arrived for work. He told police he had been made fun of by coworkers on a daily basis.

"[Negron] stated he could not take the jokes anymore and lost his mind," the report reads.

Negrin was arrested and booked into Miami-Dade County Jail. His arrest photo (above) shows him wearing his blue TSA shirt at the time of the arrest.

The attack may be the first piece of proof that the new scanners may be leaving too little to the imagination.

The $170,000 machines, which were introduced last year, took some heat from fliers who weren't quite ready to show their bod to government employees.

But if this latest incident is any indication, the scanners sound like good news for anti-terrorism and bad news for less-than-average men.
First Published: May 6, 2010 10:48 AM EDT



Thanks to technology, the term "profiling" has new meaning.

Each technical advance opens the door to a new type of crime.
 
lessons in kissing that apply to life

I read this article, and I really appreciated tis guy's "work with" approach. He sounds like he could teach anyone anything.





http://www.yourtango.com/20087725/how-to-kiss-well?alt=4

How To Kiss Well
A guy who loves kissing explains why making out is special and how to deal with a bad kisser.

by Ben Van Heuvelen


I am an aficionado of the kiss. No other act is so simple and so intimate. The light suction, the flick of the lip, the playful nibble, the deep advance and retreat of the tongue—a good kiss is like jazz, an improvisation of melodies, flirtatious staccatos, and passionate brassy crescendos. A good kiss is a rapport enacted physically, like sex, but more erotic.

Many women don't realize this. I've been surprised at how many treat kissing like it really is "first base," just a step towards something better. And when I meet such women, I face a dilemma, like being a music lover who discovers that a new friend has bad taste. Do you break it off, or do you educate? And if you educate, how do you give lessons without giving offense?

My first encounter with such a kisser ended badly. Julie and I were 14, at the conclusion of our second date. She tilted her head, put her open lips to mine, and, using a combination of wetness and suction, established airlock. Then her tongue invaded. I imagined an eel or a water-dwelling snake, or perhaps a tapeworm, darting towards my throat, slithering around, and then withdrawing, only to strike again immediately. I tried to block her with my tongue, but she swirled and pushed me back. I could not breathe. Then I began to gag reflexively.

Being fourteen has its disadvantages; Julie had not learned the cardinal rule of kissing: it's a conversation. There's nothing inherently wrong with an all-out tongue invasion, but if your interlocutor hasn't asked for it, then you're more scary than sexy. I didn't even call Julie to break up with her, figuring that if a girl had literally made me gag, she would probably get the message.

I soon realized, however, that my modest adolescent social status didn't leave me much room to be choosy. Plus, it turned out that even some awesome girls were terrible at kissing. I would have to teach them.

I took my instructional inspiration from my first girlfriend, Christine—my gold standard when it comes to kissing. Our first kiss had been, to a boy on a first date, a small miracle. I had been terribly nervous as we approached her front door. My hands had begun to sweat. (How could I touch her with sweaty hands?) I became aware of my gangly height. (Could I reach her without bending awkwardly?) I began to doubt that I should kiss her at all.

But she made it very simple. She took my wrists and clasped my hands behind her back, rose onto her toes, and pressed her bottom lip between mine, drawing my top lip between hers, just until I returned the gesture. Then it was over, punctuated with a little smack of suction as we parted. For several days after, the kiss ran through my mind. What stood out in my replay, even more than her malleable lips and that hint of her tongue, was my own feeling of pride. Despite my adolescent fumblings, I somehow felt that I had acted—there was no other word—smooth.

A great kisser makes you feel like a great kisser.

The lesson here, for any would-be kissing instructor, is that you have to teach without suggesting something is wrong. In fact, your unsuspecting students should feel as if they are teaching you.

To make this happen, you first have to understand what makes people kiss poorly. The most common mistake of bad kissers is excessive frenching, that is, the over-use of the tongue. They're not sure what else to do; they confuse passion with penetration. Download: Passion Power For Women

In response, at first, you have to french back. If you make bad kissers feel self-conscious, they'll never improve. So you indulge them, switching the direction of the tongue-swirl periodically to keep the semblance of spontaneity.

Then, right before the monotony becomes a turn-off, go for a lip. Choose top or bottom; the more thickly fleshed is probably the best one. Once you've focused on just one lip, you create so many options: simple suction; the lip switch from top to bottom, or bottom to top; the sly addition of the tongue; escalation to a full-on frencher, then a teasing retreat; the nibble. The wonderful thing about a lip lock is that once it's established, any kissing partner with a modicum of creativity will discover the possibilities and try the combinations. All you have to do is reward them by returning the favors.

More important than any single technique, though, is a general principle: you have to awaken your bad kisser's creativity.

My proudest kissing conquest, for example, is my current girlfriend, Sarah. She was the ultimate challenge. When we first met, she didn't like to kiss. She thought it felt phony. If you were feeling so damn passionate, she reasoned, then why weren't your clothes off? Being the lucky object of her passion, I didn't much argue the point—at first. Instead, I just tried to understand how on earth someone could dislike kissing.

To my surprise, I found that Sarah had much in common with the overenthusiastic tongues of my youth. For all of them, kissing was nothing more than an intimation of sex. For the over-kissers, like Julie the tongue-invader, kissing was good to the extent it mimicked intercourse. For Sarah the under-kisser, it was just a step toward what happened next. As a result, she, like other kissing dilettantes, could not see the range of kissing possibilities.

In its fully realized form, kissing is an alternate language in which lovers conduct a parallel courtship—they tease, they connect, they discover an accord. In this second relationship, the kissing relationship, Sarah needed to take it slow. I found that she had no problem with playful kissing. She would always return a peck, and bite back if I nibbled her lip. She could enjoy a kiss that did nothing more than flirt.

For a couple who had initially sprinted past first base without touching the bag, this tentativeness might seem odd. But the body can be a blunt instrument, easy to use as an outlet for the passion of new love. On the more emotional terrain of the mouth, Sarah was a modest girl, wary of committing herself too readily.

After a time, the kisses started to last longer. A gifted if infrequent poet, Sarah began to appreciate how a good kiss, like a poem, suggests more than it says outright, expressing those feelings that lovers can share only indirectly. Her creativity was stirred. She, too, has become an aficionado.
 
I'll have to convert you to the true faith. The fifth dynamic game on this planet is we eat each other's bodies. No one is exempt.


Yes, but courtesy requires that you ask first and provide a pleasurable experience for the other party. :whistling:


Mark A. Baker
 
IRS calling all Scientology banking and treasury personnel

I read this, and realized that this needs to be somehow gotten to all Scientology financial workers. There is a gold mine of rewards for snitches.


http://www.forbes.com/forbes/2009/1...bs-irs-spondello-tax-informants-on-loose.html


Tax Informants Are On The Loose
Janet Novack and William P. Barrett 12.14.09, 12:00 AM ET


For 24 years Vincent A. Spondello toiled away as an accountant for a group of related companies known as Monex, a large Newport Beach, Calif. precious metals dealer. A trusted employee, he prepared tax returns and was given such tasks as overseeing the destruction of old corporate documents. It turns out that some records that were supposedly destroyed he took home instead.

In May Spondello sent 25 boxes of original Monex papers to the Internal Revenue Service--documents that could buttress the IRS' claim that Monex's owners fraudulently moved around assets to avoid a $378 million tax bill. He made his document drop after hiring lawyers and filing a claim for a whistleblower reward that could total $57 million or more. Monex denies it owes anything, has fired Spondello and is demanding back its documents.

"He's a good guy," says Spondello lawyer Robert D. Coviello. "But he is a rat."

Pay attention. There are Vincent Spondellos taking notes, taking names and taking documents across America, and beyond.

For years the IRS grudgingly paid stingy rewards to squealers who brought it mostly small cases; during 2004 and 2005, 428 informants received a total of $12 million--only 7% of the paltry $168 million all their leads brought in. But in 2006, hoping to entice insiders to rat out big-dollar cheats and corporate tax shelters and games, Congress directed the IRS to pay tipsters at least 15% and as much as 30% of taxes, penalties and interest collected in cases where $2 million or more is at stake.

The gambit seems to be working very well. The IRS continues to get thousands of small case tips a year. But in fiscal 2009, ended Oct. 30, the IRS Whistleblower Office also logged big case leads on 1,900 taxpayers, up from 1,246 in fiscal 2008, the first full year the new law was in effect. Dozens of these tips involve purported tax losses of $100 million or more. Sure, those are just allegations. But informants "often provide extensive documentation to support their claims,'' the Whistleblower Office noted in a report. The Treasury Inspector General for Tax Administration, in a separate report, added up all the 2008 tips and found that $65 billion in unreported income was alleged.

The slow-moving IRS has yet to pay any bounties under the new scheme, which the Inspector General report said still had "deficiencies" in its execution. But the government itself is already reaping big rewards.

In June 2007 Bradley C. Birkenfeld--motivated in large part, he now acknowledges, by the new reward law--came to U.S. officials with documents in hand and laid out how his former employer, UBS AG, helped wealthy Americans hide money offshore. So far the investigation he triggered has produced a $780 million payment to the U.S. government from UBS, Switzerland's largest bank; an unprecedented agreement by the Swiss to finger 4,450 U.S. taxpayers with secret UBS accounts; and criminal investigations of more than 150 American UBS clients. That, in turn, helped pressure 14,700 taxpayers to make "voluntary" disclosures of previously undisclosed offshore kitties during a special program earlier this year, yielding extra billions in tax for the Treasury. "The entire game has changed on international tax evasion," crows IRS Commissioner Douglas Shulman.

The Boston-born Birkenfeld is facing 40 months in the federal pen but could leave prison with millions in reward money. Stephen Whitlock, director of the IRS Whistleblower Office, won't comment on any specific cases. Yet asked if the IRS might end up sending reward checks to the government's own inmates, he responds: "It could happen."

That represents another big change. Before the new law, Whitlock notes, "if you participated in the tax noncompliance--you could have been the accountant doing the ministerial activity--you could be flat-out barred" from a reward. Now such a functionary is eligible for a full reward, even if he is convicted of, say, stealing from the company he squeals on. An informant who "planned and initiated" a tax scheme is still eligible for a reduced award--unless he's convicted for that planning role.

Birkenfeld pleaded guilty to helping billionaire California real estate developer Igor M. Olenicoff hide $200 million offshore and evade $7.2 million in tax--not to orchestrating the broader UBS scheme that began before he was hired as a UBS private banker and continued after he complained about it internally and then left.

Birkenfeld was indicted, prosecutor Kevin Downing said during his August sentencing, because while fingering UBS brass, he didn't come clean about his own role helping Olenicoff. As described in a 2006 FORBES story, the billionaire's offshore dealings had been investigated by the IRS for years. In December 2007 he pleaded guilty to filing a false tax return. The Forbes 400 member got a sweet deal, paying $52 million in back taxes, interest and civil fraud penalties but drawing no jail time. Had Birkenfeld revealed what he knew about Olenicoff in June 2007, "Mr. Olenicoff would be in jail," Downing told the court.

As a former tax counsel to Senator Charles Grassley (R--Iowa), Dean Zerbe helped draft the new whistleblower law. Now he represents Birkenfeld and other reward-seekers before the IRS. "It takes a rogue to catch a rogue" is how Zerbe explains the law's philosophy. He argues that jailing Birkenfeld could deter informants. "We have people in Switzerland who want to blow the whistle on other banks but are scared to because of what they saw with Birkenfeld," he says.

"I don't think what happened to him will deter anybody else," retorts Jack A. Blum, who represents another offshore informant in his claim before the IRS. Blum's client was a backroom functionary. After being hired by Liechtenstein's lgt Group, a bank owned by the tiny European tax haven's royal family, to help digitize client trust files, Blum's client walked off with a disc full of names. He sold a copy to the German government for $6 million and then filed an informant's claim with the IRS for a cut of the taxes owed by the 100-plus Americans whose financial secrets were on that disc.

The new willingness of governments to pay big rewards "has changed the game," says Blum, a longtime advisor to Congress and the IRS on the offshore world. "In the Caribbean there are people working in these offshore banks for next to nothing." Now they have a way to get rich.

Despite IRS processing that Blum describes as "slow as molasses," he expects the Liechtenstein whistle-blower to start getting reward money next year. Long term, he says, the informant law's "potential, particularly internationally, is huge."

The Caribbean looks like a fertile source for tips. In August business partners John DaCosta and N.B. Salty Miller sued the IRS in the U.S. Court of Federal Claims to collect a reward on what they said were tips that led the IRS to collect $30 million from the American-born widow of a Jamaican businessman. DaCosta worked for him, perhaps one reason many internal financial documents found their way to the agency. The IRS has asked the court to dismiss the men's complaint on jurisdictional grounds.

So squealing has already set the offshore world on its head. Less clear is what effect it will have on domestic tax avoidance. Whistleblowers' lawyers say that the presence of informants could eventually curb aggressive corporate tax practices and that the law's impact will grow over time--if experience with the False Claims Act, on which the tax law is modeled, is an indication.

Since Congress rewrote the Civil War-era False Claims Act at Grassley's urging in 1986, the government has collected $14.5 billion from whistleblower cases--known as qui tam suits, from a Latin phrase declaring that a suitor is acting on behalf of the king as well as himself--and paid out $2.7 billion of that to informers and their lawyers, calculates Joel D. Hesch, a former Department of Justice false-claims litigator. The biggest awards have come in recent years. In September, for example, a whistleblower was awarded $51.5 million for fingering Pfizer's illicit marketing of the painkiller Bextra.

Hesch, author of the 200-page how-to manual Reward: Collect Millions for Reporting Tax Evasion, predicts the tax program will eventually pay even bigger rewards. Why? Under false claims a whistleblower must have evidence a contractor intentionally ripped off the government. Under the tax informant program, however, the tax underpayer doesn't have to have fraudulent intent. Every company and every upper-income citizen is a potential target. (Tips about individuals whose adjusted gross hasn't hit $200,000 for at least one year covered by the tip are handled under the IRS' old, less generous reward system.) If a company pays more tax because the IRS disallows some strategy or deduction the company believed was okay, the informant can collect. Hesch cites some fairly mundane matters--say, misclassification of workers as independent contractors to avoid payroll tax--as potential targets for tipsters. He also points to the $3.4 billion GlaxoSmithkline paid to settle IRS claims it had improperly shifted income to foreign affiliates as evidence that a squealer might some day reap a reward worth hundreds of millions of dollars.

Birkenfeld told a colorful tale of encrypted laptops and smuggling diamonds into the U.S. in a toothpaste tube. Some of the biggest cases being flagged by whistleblowers are made of duller material: They involve complex corporate transactions designed to cloak a company's tax-avoidance purpose. Gregory S. Lynam, who left a corporate tax law practice to represent whistleblowers, says one case he brought to the IRS involved a 120-step transaction used by a multi-national to repatriate foreign earnings without paying U.S. taxes on them. Only with help from an insider could the IRS find the weak links in this structure, Lynam argues.

So far, Lynam says, he and three tax lawyers he works with have filed claims asserting, in total, $40 billion in additional taxes and penalties due. Even if a company is already under audit, he notes, if a whistleblower provides crucial information the auditor hasn't yet found, he is eligible for a reward.

There's yet another noteworthy difference between a tax and a false claims informant. The latter files a secret qui tam lawsuit, the government investigates and, if it finds the case has merit, takes it over, with the tipster picking up 15% to 25% of the eventual recovery. But whether the government intervenes or not, the false claims suit eventually becomes public and the identity of the informant is revealed.

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By contrast, the IRS aims to keep secret a tax informant's identity and even, if possible, his very existence. "If everybody does what they're supposed to do and is careful, taxpayers really shouldn't find out how it happened they were selected for an audit," says the IRS' Whitlock. That means a snitch could file his claim about a corporate tax ploy and quietly move on to work at another company or even stay at the target company.

The IRS process works like this: The informant (usually with the help of a lawyer) files a Form 211, "Application for Award for Original Information," describing what he knows and attaching documents. The Whistleblower Office screens the material to see if there's a plausible and big enough tax issue and to make sure papers that might "taint" the investigation--because, for example, they are protected from IRS discovery by the attorney-client privilege--aren't given to auditors.

According to the Inspector General's report, as of March, the Whistleblower Office had processed Form 211s alleging more than $2 million in taxes due from each of 1,800 taxpayers. Only 300 cases had been rejected, while 700 were pending in the IRS' Criminal Investigation unit and 800 in its civil divisions.

Zerbe and other private whistleblower lawyers argue the law permits continuing involvement by informants and their lawyers where their knowledge might help build a case. But ever protective of both taxpayer privacy and its own powers, the IRS plays its cards close to the vest. A whistleblower is told nothing about the progress of a civil case until it is closed or he's paid a reward. That can take years, since the IRS doesn't pay until the target has exhausted his appeals and anted up the cash. "I tell my clients, 'The IRS is like a glacier. It moves very slowly but with certainty destroys everything in its path,'" Lynam says. (His group of tax lawyers can afford to wait because they have joined a plaintiff firm that has fees rolling in from asbestos and other claims.)

Informants so far run the gamut. "We have people who are an ex-something--an ex-partner, an ex-spouse or significant other, an ex-employee," says Whitlock. "We have people who are current employees who are bothered by what is going on, people who had a potential business relationship [with the target] and decided not to pursue it."

Another source of informants: lawsuits and arbitration battles. "Anybody who is sophisticated could see this as an opportunity to fight back in litigation," says Chicago tax lawyer Robert E. McKenzie. He knows whereof he speaks. A disgruntled client of a national brokerage firm filed an arbitration claim over the handling of her account. During discovery the firm learned that the woman, a foreign national, had lived in a California mansion for years but had never filed U.S. tax returns. So the firm hired McKenzie to file a Form 211 (with its general counsel listed as the informant) reporting the client to the IRS.

Still, McKenzie, who mostly defends taxpayers, has some qualms about this new age of informants. "I think we should enforce the law. But do we want a Soviet-style society where neighbors turn in neighbors, friends turn in friends and employees turn in bosses?"

Or where, as a litigation tactic, heirs turn in heirs? Nashville lawyer William Prentice Cooper III, a son of a Tennessee governor and brother of Democratic Congressman James Cooper, filed Form 211 informant claims stemming from his efforts on behalf of an 11-year-old great-grandson of Dorothy Dillon Eweson and the youth's married-into-the-family mother in a raging probate fight. Eweson, daughter of famed financier Clarence Dillon, died in 2005 at age 92, leaving an estimated $300 million held personally and in trusts.

With himself as the plaintiff, Cooper has just started two lawsuits in U.S. Tax Court, primarily seeking a review of the IRS' decision not to pursue his Form 211 claims. His lawsuits suggest that one trust set up by Clarence 91 years ago and valued at $103 million was improperly left out of Eweson's probate and also that a hefty generation-skipping tax wasn't paid.

Cooper tells forbes he hopes his Tax Court actions will prompt the IRS to take a new look at the situation and generate some money for the heirs he's helping. "This was taken as a step of last resort," he says. However, experts doubt the 2006 whistleblower law created a legal right for someone to challenge an IRS decision not to pursue a Form 211 tip.

The Eweson estate and other members of the Dillon family are not named defendants in Cooper's Tax Court lawsuits. In a statement, a Dillon family spokesman says an IRS audit was already under way when Cooper filed his informant claims and that the estate tax return was later "accepted by the IRS and a closing letter was issued."

Still another family informant drama is playing out in the case of John M. Potter, owner of a Jackson, Mich. topless bar who was indicted in January on charges he underreported his taxable income by $2 million from 2002 to 2005. He was turned in to federal authorities by an estranged daughter contemplating a reward. She sent in an 11-page single-spaced statement that reads like a Sopranos script.

"Money is all important to him! If he found out that I turned him in I have no idea what he would do. He has a very short temper and can be violent," the daughter wrote. She then detailed how Potter, now 74, siphoned cash from his business; paid employees off the books; kept ledgers hidden under a seat cushion; and was assisted by her older sister who "wants to inherit everything" and his 23-years-younger girlfriend who "is no prize." (Neither was charged in the case.) In November Potter pleaded guilty to filing a false tax return. Stephen J. Dunn, his attorney, says he'll argue Potter should get probation based on his age, military service, lack of prior convictions and cooperation with the IRS after his daughter squealed on him. "She was motivated by the reward, a few pieces of silver,'' Dunn complains.

Joseph R. (Joe) Francis, the Girls Gone Wild video impresario, last year was convicted of child abuse and prostitution charges in Florida. He just pleaded guilty in Los Angeles to nonfelony charges of filing false tax returns, was fined $10,000 and paid $250,000 in back taxes but got no new jail time. Light punishment? In a pending civil lawsuit filed in the name of his company, Francis claims three now-ex-executives plotted to embezzle money from his company and "began contacting" the IRS on an informant basis hoping Francis would be convicted and jailed and their own frauds would go undiscovered. Francis' pleading says one defendant e-mailed another a copy of a news story headlined, "IRS Pays Informants to Squeal on Tax Cheats." With that civil case still in its early stages, defendants have not answered in court and couldn't be contacted.

For sheer fascination it's hard to beat the growing California litigation surrounding accountant Vincent Spondello and Monex, the company that employed him for nearly a quarter-century. Founded by Louis Carabini in 1967 and still run by his family, Monex has a long history of regulatory run-ins, consumer complaints and lawsuits against it by its own (often former) employees. In the mid-1990s the IRS disallowed Monex's use of a 1980s tax shelter involving London Metal Exchange straddle transactions. Monex agreed in 1998 that it owed the IRS $134 million, a sum that with interest and penalties is now nearly $400 million.

In June 2008, just before expiration of the ten-year statute of limitations for acting on that debt, the IRS filed a lawsuit in federal court in Santa Ana, Calif. essentially alleging that the Carabini family had moved all its business assets, including its 800 number, into other legal entities, leaving the feds with a claim against worthless shells. The IRS asked the court to enforce the assessment against the new entities. Denying wrongdoing and liability, Monex argued, among other points, that its ability to defend itself was hampered by the fact that the IRS had waited so long.

As Monex lawyers began preparing their defense, an astonishing informant tale emerged. Here's what court records show: Instead of carrying out orders to dispose of old records in 1996 and 1997, Spondello, a Monex accounting supervisor, had taken boxes of them home. In the same time frame--before Monex agreed to that $134 million bill--he anonymously fed information to the IRS about Monex asset transfers.

In May 2009 Spondello, who was still working at Monex, secretly requested a reward from the IRS by filing a Form 211, with an attached 33-page memo prepared by one of his lawyers describing the documents. Ten days later the boxes and their contents were turned over to the IRS. Monex officials, who by then had learned Spondello had squirreled away an unspecified number of old records, soon fired him. Eventually, Spondello's lawyers informed Monex that he was an IRS informant who had handed over 25 boxes--possibly upwards of 50,000 pages.

During a deposition for a lawsuit that Monex has filed against him, Spondello testified he kept the documents because he worried that Monex was engaging in tax offenses and he might be held personally liable. Spondello has filed a counterclaim against Monex alleging wrongful termination.

As you might imagine, Monex is crying foul, claiming the IRS and its lawyers from the U.S. Department of Justice violated attorney-client and other legal privileges and the government's own rules in their dealings with Spondello while he was still a Monex employee. Monex is desperately trying to get back and prohibit use in court of the documents, or at least get copies.

Last month a federal judge rejected Monex's efforts to dismiss the lawsuit as insufficiently precise in its allegations. The ruling would appear to increase greatly the evidentiary value of Spondello's many boxes.

One big issue in this case is the so-called one-bite rule, an IRS directive that says the agency can be a one-time passive recipient of documents an informant brings from a target but can't have him go back and take more documents. Monex claims federal agents knew the 25-box document drop was simply the latest bite in a long series of disclosures from Spondello. The feds say they followed the rules.

Are you ready for the new world of tax snitching? If you are chiseling, you can't trust anybody.
 
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You might be a player if ... if you think oral is first base.

Check out his entire list here. But I think we all know that women can be players too. How to tell? Ladies, you may be a player if ...

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You’ve been the guest star in more than one threesome.

You can tell if a guy is circumcised when his clothes are still on.
 
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