I wish I could say an obvious consensus was reached and the answer is clear to me. I really do appreciate everyone's feedback. If nothing was actually resolved at least we all had a chance to get some things off our chests.
One thing I do know for sure is that one board cannot possibly please all of the people all of the time. Just ask Andreas
.
ESMB was born as an alternative to OCMB and ars. I had earlier tried to change OCMB and it was a disaster. I went about it all wrong and it wasn't "mine" to do that to anyway. I made enemies left right and centre. Just ask Arnie, or Ladybird or Roan. We were bitter enemies. OCMB had a culture that was all it's own. It had evolved into a stable, highly critical board which suited a LOT of people just fine. In fact that was fine by me too, BUT I wanted it to make it more friendly to those exiting the cult who still had some good things to say about the tech without getting beaten down. This was the wrong thing to do. OCMB is not about a nurturing environment. That's not to say it can't be that - it can and has been at times, but primarily it's a hard edged, critical message board.
ARS had turned into a spam ridden war zone that frightened me for years. ARS was definitely not a safe place for exes who needed support as they worked their way out of the trap. Again there are some great posters on ars, but the general feel is not exactly welcoming.
So when it came time to launch the board, I had to make a decision about who it was aimed at. I thought a lot about who should be excluded. I thought about making it exclusively for exes but realised that some of the wisest and most experienced people who could offer support and information to exes are people who have never been in a cult. So I decided against that.
Then I had to make a decision about the Freezone. I've learnt a lot since I started the board but originally I had guys like Alan Walter and Mike Goldstein included in my loose definition. I didn't know Mike very well back then but from all I had read about him and Idenics I knew I respected him and knew he had a very rich history in Scientology that would make for fascinating reading (if he ever decided to join, so when he did I was really pleased). I had known Alan Walter for years and remembered how unbelievably helpful he had been to me when I was a terrified, newly out ex who still thought there was a lot of merit to Ron's Tech. And the stories he told! I didn't want to leave the likes of him out either. So to leave out "The Freezone" was not an option for me either.
Then when I wrote my original FAQ, I worded it as follows:
What is the purpose of the board?
The board is for Ex Scientologists of all "denominations" to get together and talk things over.
Some leave the church because they are forced out by some insane ethics order yet remain true believers; some left of their own accord because it stopped making sense; some find the tech truly workable but management corrupt; some find the earlier tech workable but call the Golden Age of Tech the "work of squirrels"; some don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater and some feel that there is no baby at all.
Some practice Scientology alternatives, some practice Freezone Scientology, some use bits and pieces in their daily lives and some want nothing more to do with it.
It is likely that most people are happy where they sit in regards to Scientology. They have their minds made up about it and no amount of discussion will change that. This board is not meant to be a vehicle to plead your case, reconvert the fallen or preach your brand. It is designed to allow people to connect up, gain some understanding of our differences, learn to respect each others opinions and find some peace with it and hopefully within ourselves.
Who is considered an "Ex Scientologist"?
Anyone who has broken free of the restraints of the Official Church of Scientology and is "allowed" to read & post to the internet.
Another reason I didn't want to exclude anyone was that I wanted ESMB to be the opposite of the church. I wanted people to feel comfortable to be able to accept or reject any belief or belief system that they chose to. I never wanted to be Big Brother or the Thought Police.
So that is a bit of history and where my head was at when I started the board.
So what changed?
Nothing really.
Like everyone else I'm human and can tend to be swayed or influence by popular opinion and criticism. I had a lot of people in my ear about the perceived direction ESMB was taking. So I thought I'd throw open the question and see where it went.
I realised a few things over the course of the last few days. I also did a little bit of research on ESMB and came up with a few statistics. Your milage may vary with this "analysis" but it was surprising to me to discover the following:
There are 4580 threads on ESMB. 70 of these are in "The Freezone" section and 104 in "Independant Field" section.
Combined this is 3.8% of the total threads on ESMB. ESMB has been online for 539 days meaning there is an average of 8.5 new threads every day or 59 per week. Of these 59 new threads, an average of 2 are started in the combined FZ and IF sections.
I also looked at the top 100 posters to ESMB. I counted maybe 15 of those who I would consider "hardcore" FZers and none of them in the top 5 posters.
So the argument that ESMB is a Freezone board is statistically false.
So why is there this perception?
I think it sometimes goes like this.....
Poster A makes a post.
Poster B makes a reply that mentions the FZ or the tech in some way.
Poster C counters the argument.
poster D counters the argument
Poster B defends their position
Posters E, F, G, H & I jump in and counter the argument.
So what do we have? A whole thread that was turned into a tech discussion by the people who don't want to discuss the tech.
There is nothing wrong with this. It's how things work. But when I see this happen and I see people complaining about "techies" on the board, I have to shake my head. Out of the 9 imaginary posters in the above example, there was 1 who wanted to promote the tech, yet the perception is that all we talk about it "the tech!" I do realise that this isn't always the way it goes, but it does happen a lot.
The only way to prevent this is to disallow anyone having a positive word to say about LRH or "The Tech". This is EXACTLY what I started ESMB to avoid! Can you see the problem?
Another thought that occured to me is that FZers can be extremely "restimulative" (excuse the scientologese but I can't think of a better word).
We all lost our religion. For me at least it was devistating. I lost my profession, my philosophy on life, my understanding of the human condition, my friends, my social life and ultimately my marriage. I think most people experience similar losses when leaving Scientology.
So to have FZers still talk about "life with The Tech", can stir up a LOT of unresolved feelings & emotions. There are two sides to this coin.
As FZers, you need to understand how hurt and damaged exes are. They have read the data and come to a (sometimes) painful decision that Scientology is not for them. This DOES not mean that they are not feeling the loss of something major in their lives. They may also be feeling betrayed and used and conned. These are some pretty powerful emotions to have stirred up on a daily basis. FZers have made the decision to continue along a certain path and that is totally fine with me, but you must understand that flaunting that position on a board mainly filled with exes, is going to stir up a lot of stuff.
On the other hand, when us exes were Scientologists, we fought with all our might to be allowed that freedom. We WANTED to be Scientologists and resented anyone who told us we were mad. Now just because "we" changed our minds, doesn't mean that everyone else has to. Do you remember being a gung ho Scientologist? I do. I wanted to save everyone. I was as annoying as hell. So sometimes when you think a FZer is proselytizing and you want them to stop, maybe you are seeing a little of your old self in that person and you don't like it. I realise this is a generality and I'm not pointing the finger at anyone, it's just some thoughts I've had on the subject.
The Freezone isn't going to go away. Whether they have a presence on ESMB will not stop anyone who wants to go down that path. And IF a person who is seeking the FreeZone happens to stumble upon ESMB they will certainly be given every argument as to why this might not be a good idea. If they still want to go down that path I say they absolutely have that right.
So........
In summary, nothing is really going to change in structure or rules, but I hope that something more subtle will change. I hope the many exchanges below have allowed people to get a deeper insight into how people generally feel about freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom of thought etc. I hope each "side" can respect each other a little more and adapt their posts to be a little more understanding of others on the board.
This doesn't mean you need to be all sweet and agreeable. Hell no. But when you see a person who has just escaped the cult and are in a terrible state, the last thing you should be doing is advertising FZ services. The same goes the other way. If someone has just uncovered and resolved a huge problem in their lives with some processing, I think it's completely inapproriate to respond with "You're just a brainwashed cultie and it's not real and you are a moron".
Oh God. I've gone on and on. This was much longer than anticipated. There is only one more thing I need to tell you.
Alanzo & I are friends again.
